A Thessian's Whisper
by PMC65
Summary: A look at the early years of E.W. Shepard and Liara T'Soni: Starting in 2164 when Shepard is 10 and Liara is 87 the story focuses on their individuals lives before they meet in The Shepherdess and the Questing Beast. This story containes moments of light and moments of extreme darkness ... Please note M for mature themes. There are dark elements in this story as well as humor.
1. Grass Hockey Escape

_Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or storylines from the Mass Effect Universe._

_Story Updated: This story was updated in response to certain reveals in Mass Effect 3 such as Liara coming from Armali and Matriarch Aethyta being Benezia's former partner. There were also certain items that I wanted to add to EW Shepard as well. So if you have read this before and you see additions you are not going crazy ... well at least not as it pertains to your memory of this story. - PM Canales 5/18/2012 - _

_Author's Note: This story was started simply as a personal back story for my "canon" Shepard in Mass Effect. It was to focus only on E.W. Shepard to show what she had lost before her introduction on the Normandy. But as I started it, Liara T'Soni was over my shoulder wanting to be a part of the overall story. I've never written fan fiction before and wasn't planning on putting this out but here it goes. _

_I hope that you enjoy it ... at least a little._

* * *

"Well, what about Shepard?" Ricky asked, "She's pretty tough."

"She's also fearless," Tyler added, "I heard that she killed a wild hog last summer up by Timbersome Creek."

Ricky, all excited, cut him off "That's true! And she did it as it was charging at her! Kablam!"

"I heard that it was the Sheriff that killed it," Freddy argued.

"No," Ricky shook his head, "It was Shepard! The Sheriff had went off to ... to ... well, I'm not really sure why she went off but Shep was left there with the gun and that hog just appeared. Shepard grabbed the Sheriff's Winchester, aimed for a shoulder shot and ... bam! Down it went!"

"Aw, c'mon!" Freddy spit. "That's a bunch of bunk!"

Ricky turned to look at Broder, the oldest of the boys, "You remember that hog, don't cha Broder … Our families ate it at the barbeque her parents had last summer at their place."

"Ah, that's hog wash!" Freddy snorted. "Get it? HOG wash!"

"I don't know," Broder replied, as he rubbed the back of his neck. "I like Shepard, but she's a girl. She could get hurt and well ... cry."

Ewald agreed, "Yah, a girl. They cry easy. Besides, she can't be too tough … cuz she takes ballet with my sister. My sister! I ain't playing hockey with my sister!"

"Phhfft! How tough can she be?" Freddy asked to no one in particular as he lifted the front of his bike off the ground. "What … is she gonna play in a tutu?" His own joke made him snort harder pushing snot down his face.

Broder took off his Mindoir Tigers baseball cap and hit it across the back of Freddy's head. "Clean your face junior!" Freddy yelped and threatened to tell their mother if he did that again. Freddy was two years younger than Broder and they had come to Mindoir with their mother just 5 years prior. Their step-father had been hired by the Mindoir Nokeic Mining Company as a Process Control Supervisor (Second Class Power Engineer) and while typically the employees of the MNMC lived in the town of Moorland, their step-father wanted his wife and step-sons in a safer community. So he worked for two years on Mindoir, leaving his family back on Earth with his wife's parents in North Carolina, until he had enough money and a place. He should have been able to have them move off-world after a year but he needed approval by the Highland Falls Committee to purchase a small house in their farming community. That approval had been a struggle to get because the citizens preferred the mining personnel to stay in their own community of Moorland. He had almost given up hope when his struggle had come to the attention of the Immanuel Baptist Church pastor. Through that pastor's intervention he was approved, purchased the home and brought his family to Mindoir. The pastor even assisted in his wife getting a waitress job at the Comet Café. "I don't know Ricky; girls aren't as tough as us boys. If something happened to her … Nah, don't want no cryin' or hurt girl on our team. Who else can we get?"

The boys stood around at a loss on the street corner in front of Rurik's Grocers. Names were thrown about but knocked down for various reasons; away for the summer vacation, too weak, to short, ugly hair, not liked by one or more of the little group. As the minutes ticked on with no resolution, Ricky put his hands in his jeans. "Broder, we could be here all day and still not have one more player. If that happens, well … we forfeit."

"Forrrrfeit!" Ewald giggled. "You said a bad word!"

"Forfeit isn't a bad word, stupid. The word fu…" Freddy stopped midway as Mr. Rurik appeared with a broom to sweep the sidewalk. Mr. Rurik was a kind old man who had moved to Mindoir shortly after it was settled from Scotland. He would wear his kilt every Wednesday and at all community events ... bringing along his bag pipes when asked. He loved to tell how he could trace his lineage all the way to William of Orange and that had made the boys laugh. They started referring to Mr. AlasdairRurik as _Orangster_ ... but never to his face. As the old man smiled at the boys and commented on the heat they politely greeted the grocer and moved to the other side of the street.

Broder removed his cap again and used the back of his arm to wipe the sweat off his brow. "Balders! I guess we have no choice then. Go see if Shep will play and we'll meet ya at the park."

"Cool!" Ricky shouted as he ran down the street towards the Shepard home.

He was so glad that she would be playing with them; he ignored it when Broder yelled after him, "And if she cries, so will you!"

* * *

"Now doll. Why do you want to treat me this way? Haven't I been good to you? Please, please be nice to your boy and …" CLANK! "Damn it!" Pierce Shepard rolled out from under his 1943 Ford Jeep as Ricky came barreling down the street.

"Hi, Mr. Shepard," Ricky shouted as he came to a sudden stop against the Jeep, "Man, is this ole' thing broken down again?"

"What? This thing isn't broken down," Pierce Shepard replied as he grabbed the hose and tried cooling down by running water over the back of his neck and hair, "She just likes a little attention. You know how women are."

"That's not a woman, Mr. Shepard," Ricky laughed. "That's a piece of junk with wheels!"

"What? Don't hurt my gal's feelings," Pierce dropped the hose, put the boy in a headlock and drug him over to the front of the Jeep, "Now apologize to the lady, young man."

Ricky continued to laugh as he apologized to the Jeep. "I'm sorry ma'am. You are beau-TI-ful and very, very smart. And your wheels are very … round!"

Pierce let the boy go after giving him a quick hug and then turned off the hose, "That's better … I guess you're looking for Eli?"

"Yes sir," Ricky said as they both started walking up to the front porch, "we need Shepard to come play grass hockey with us at the park."

"Whoa, there boy," Pierce stopped Ricky at the porch steps, "Uh, if you go up in that house and say the word hockey in front of Mrs. Shepard …" Pierce whistled and pulled the young boy back to the curb. "This will take some delicate handling. You go to the park and Eli will meet you there."

"Yes sir, Mr. Shepard." Ricky laughed and ran off back in the direction he came.

Pierce Shepard walked back to the porch steps where his Swamp Fox beer was sitting and after wiping his hands on his official "work on Jeep" jeans, grabbed his Haakon Electrical & Plumbing Company shirt off the rail, picked up his beer and took a gulp before heading into the house. As Pierce passed through the living room he noticed his Gibson guitar leaning against the couch ... It appeared that his daughter had been strumming on his guitar again and instead of putting it back on the stand she had carelessly laid it against the couch. Pierce shook his head and placed the Gibson back where it belonged. He liked his day job as the manager of HE&PC but he really loved his side gigs with the band he had put together with his best friend Birgit Hallestrøm called _The Live Sprockets_.

He had been playing in bands since he was fourteen and living just outside Savannah, Georgia at a place called Tybee Island. Pierce considered himself just a good ole' Georgia boy, who had a very traditional upbringing, with his father a fireman and his mother an elementary schoolteacher. His parents kept him and his two sisters focused on education, sports and family. When he wasn't in school, fishing with his dad, playing high school baseball, surfing or making music, he was chasing girls. As the years passed, Pierce moved around with friends still playing music while doing odd jobs and chasing girls. He had no particular "type" of gal … heck, he loved them all.

"Elizabeth, wipe your feet before you enter this house." Pierce heard his wife say to their daughter as the backdoor was opened. He stopped in his tracks and quickly headed back outside to the mat on the front porch. He looked at his boots and saw the mud that was a result of his cool down treatments with the hose and saw the track on the living room floor. _Shit! This is not good!_ Pierce thought as he took off his boots on the porch and looked at what he had done. Worried that his wife would come into the front part of the house, Pierce quickly took his shirt and began wiping any traces of mud off the oak floor in the living room. As he wiped up the floor, he couldn't help but smile as he thought, _Oh, brother … Is this what Casanova was doing in his 40's? _Who would ever have guessed that he would willingly be on all fours wiping up mud with one of his own shirts? _Isn't love grand!_ He thought as he heard his wife moving about in the kitchen.

A much younger Pierce had no desire to settle down, thought love was something for suckers and as his friends started to get married and have kids he made new friends who shared his very hedonistic lifestyle. He knew that love existed, he saw his parents overall happy marriage, but he couldn't see that kind of life for him. Not when there was so much out there to see and so many women willing to jump into his bed. But life is a funny thing … it moves people in different directions than they themselves would have planned ... one step at a time.

The first step to move Pierce to where he was now happened as he was touring Europe with a band called _The Morphine Drip_. It was on that tour that he met Birgit Hallestrøm in Sweden. They had a brief fling but given that she preferred women and he preferred being single, they quickly moved into the friendship category. Birgit, who had been on her own since she was fourteen, was ready to start her life over so she applied and was accepted to the new colony being established on a planet called Mindoir. She had started there in construction and within a few years she was part of the new Highland Falls Police Department that was established after an ugly incident occured between a miner and a farmer. Pierce had laughed at her for becoming a _trailer park colonist_. Despite the long distance, the two kept in contact over the years and it was Birgit who talked Pierce into going on vacation with her to Costa Blanca, Spain. They both loved rock climbing and she had wanted to try her hand at it there. Nearing the end of the vacation and while taking a break from climbing, Pierce and Birgit were sunning on the beach in Alicante. Birgit couldn't help but notice the beautiful woman staring out to sea. She must have watched the woman for twenty minutes before she nudged Pierce who was half-asleep. "Have you ever seen a woman so beautiful?" Birgit asked just loud enough for him to hear. Beautiful didn't even start to describe her in Pierce's eyes. He had never seen anything so striking and quickly realized that he was among many admirers. Normally, he would have gone over to her and worked his moves but for the first time in his life found himself paralyzed. It was more than her beauty but also the way that she held herself and the way that she moved that made him stupid, so he just watched her without speaking.

"Momma, can you get the blue bowl for me? It's too high." The words brought Pierce back from his daydream. That same woman was now in his kitchen telling their daughter a story about when she was just able to walk. "You would try and build steps using chairs, tables, boxes … even your stuffed animal, just about anything to get to the cookie jar." This was followed by both of them laughing in the kitchen, then a small voice piped up, "That was when I was a baby, momma. I'm grown up now." Pierce smiled at his little kid's response and couldn't agree more when he heard his wife say, "Is that so? Well, you are still my baby at ten and you will be my baby at thirty and at fifty and at-" Pierce could tell that Hannah was tickling their daughter as giggles and pleas of "Momma, stop!" were heard.

Their baby … Elizabeth Whisper Shepard. She was the blessing that cemented the marriage of Pierce and Hannah. Her first name was that of his mother and her second was Hannah's choice, "All that is good in my life, came as a whisper. Quiet, soothing and without vanity … she is the greatest blessing in my life. She is my whisper." Eli, as Pierce called her, had her mother's features and build, everything but the lips. That was where his genes kicked in. He had inherited full lips from his mother and had hated them. They weren't Mick Jagger full but they were "plush", as one girlfriend called them. He still didn't know what the hell that meant. All he knew was that they were a little too feminine for a guy as far as he was concerned, but after seeing his daughter smile, smile like his own mother; it made it all worth it. Living with those "plush" lips had paid off if it meant handing them off to his daughter.

Pierce remembered the beer and slid it behind his oversized leather chair and then strolled into the kitchen where he found Shepard in the kitchen shelling the garden peas that she had just picked with her mother. Hannah was nowhere to be seen, but Pierce knew that she had to be close since he hadn't heard the back door open. So he quietly walked up to Shepard, bent down where she was sitting and whispered in her ear, "Ricky has asked if you could join him and a few others to a hockey game at the park."

Shepard looked up at her dad with a grin and clumsily put the bowl on the table spilling peas on the floor. Pierce waved her to stay seated, while he retrieved the runaway peas and in a loud voice said, "Where is your mom?" then whispered, "I'll divert preacher woman … but you owe me."

Shepard grinned and in a voice just as loud replied, "She went in the laundry room. Do you want me to get her, daddy?"

"What's with all the shouting?" Hannah asked as she came back into the kitchen.

Pierce took two long strides and scooped his wife up in his arms, "Come here woman!"

"Pierce," Hannah struggled against his embrace as well as the grease on him from the Jeep, "You have muck on you and you stink of sweat. Put me down!"

"Muck? Stink? Hmmmm, then why don't you come take a shower with me?" Pierce teased as he raised an eyebrow, "You could baptize me clean, preacher woman."

Hannah placed her hand across his mouth, looked at their young daughter and back at her husband, "Pierce, hush and put me down!"

Pierce laughing, let her down and patted her behind, "You make me think sinful thoughts preacher woman."

Preacher woman was Pierce's name for his wife. She was, after all, the pastor at the Immanuel Baptist Church in Mindoir. After being in the community for over twelve years the Shepards were well liked and Pierce was now proud to be a "colonist". He was the town's all-around good joe who would lend a hand if your vehicle was broke down, help you build a barbeque pit or barn on your property, meet you at a local fishing hole, hunt in season, play poker, B.S at the local pub, coach the local little league team, but rarely would you see him at church. People commented at times on the fact that he didn't attend church but his wife was so respected and loved that it never got past the observation stage. In fact, you would have been hard pressed to find anyone, churchgoer or not, who didn't like and respect the pastor. She was kind and caring to everyone. When she wasn't focused on the church, she taught piano and helped out at the elementary school that young Shepard attended. Neighbors could rely on her for spiritual guidance, gardening tips, minor nursing needs and a warm smile of comfort. Hannah always appeared confident and calm to everyone around her, a woman above reproach.

At this moment, Pierce knew that he was frustrating this highly respected woman and as she started to walk away from him, he playfully pulled her back to him, hugging her from behind, "What is wrong with you Pierce?" Pierce began whispering sweet nothings as Hannah tried pulling away, "Mr. Shepard, behave yourself and mind your tongue!"

Pierce laughed, then gently pulled her closer and whispered in her ear, "Where would you like my tongue?"

Hannah blushed and quickly turned around to face him. She placed her hand back over his mouth as she became even more frustrated and began to scold him, "Pierce, your daughter is in the room. What is wrong with you this afternoon?"

"Daughter," Pierce laughed as he pulled Hannah's hand away, "I have fallen under the spell of a spiritual woman. Go play in the park for a couple of hours. I want this woman to heal me."

Shepard laughed at her father but waited for her mother to approve her leaving and once Hannah waved her on, she raced out of the kitchen, through the living room and banging out the front door as her father began serenading her mother with their song _Besame la Boca_.

It was this song that had brought the two together and was forever considered theirs. Two days after Pierce had watched this vision on the beach, he strolled past a restaurant which had a beautiful melody drifting out onto the street. The music pulled Pierce into the restaurant, where he found the same woman playing the piano as others sat around listening. He quickly ran to his cheap hotel room and returned with his guitar knowing that when words failed him, music was there to help. So he pulled a chair close to the piano, smiled at her and joined her in playing _Besame la Boca_.

The woman simply watched him as she continued playing and after they were finished Pierce asked her if she would have drinks with him. When she declined he realized that she was from France by her accent and asked if she was in Alicante on vacation. Pierce was shocked to learn that his "dream" woman was the pastor at the local Immanuel Baptist Church. Pierce had been raised a Baptist himself but had never really believed and was agnostic leaning towards atheistic. When she asked him what faith he was, he debated on lying. He knew that as soon as he said either A word that she would start to preach at him or walk out or worse, both. But Pierce was not one to be dishonest even in bedding women. So he told her how he felt, waiting on her to respond, but she was quiet as she looked at him. Pierce was almost at the point of speaking just to break the silence when she smiled and asked, "And you don't mind my faith?"

Here Pierce was expecting … no waiting for her to judge him and instead she was concerned about how he felt. It was a peek into the future with Hannah, who never seemed to put pressure or demands on Pierce; in fact he always seemed to be the one trying to get more of her. He started to attend church, not because she asked or expected it or because he was becoming a believer, but because he couldn't stand not being near her. Just a smile of approval from her or a moment of her attention made him feel important. In fact, she made him feel for the first time in his life that he really mattered. Pierce spent a year not trying to get her in bed, although it did result in many cold showers, but focused on getting a ring on her finger that said she was his. She had turned him down twice before she finally said yes and on their wedding day he cried. He didn't care who saw, he just knew that he had never felt so happy or grateful the day that Hannah Olivie Durante became his wife. Those that had known Pierce, from his family to his closest friends, were amazed at the change she had brought about in him. He still was not a believer in any god but he believed in her and with her influence started believing in himself for the first time. Maybe he could be a good man like his father. Maybe he could love only one woman. Just maybe.

With little Shepard out of the house, Pierce looked into his wife's dark green eyes as he became more serious in his desire for her. "Do you know how you make me feel, Hannah?"

Hannah placed her hands on his cheeks, softly kissed him and then whispered soft words in French.

This always pleased him and he lowered his hands to cup her _derrière,_ "What did you say?"

Hannah smiled as she pulled off his t-shirt, still speaking soft words in French, stopping short of removing the shirt completely off of him. He now found his hands caught in the t-shirt as she began pulling him towards the shower.

"Where are you taking me warden?" He pretended to struggle as they went down the hallway. "No warden, I'll be a good boy!" Hannah started to laugh as she pulled him into the shower "Help! I'm trapped! Can someone help me?"


	2. Holes & Hands

"Uh, hello? Can someone help me, please? Can you hear me out there? I'm trapped. I need help!" Liara was tired, hungry and slightly faint when she heard movement outside her double bedroom doors. It had been hours since the last time that she had heard any kind of movement on the 2nd floor and now she didn't care who knew what she had gotten herself into. Well, she was praying that it wasn't her mother but she was now so desperate, she was willing to risk it. The left door to her suite slowly opened and a young asari popped her head in. "Oh, thank the Goddess, it's you! Help me!"

Sibila's mouth dropped open as she saw her best friend and cousin sitting on a chair with her hands inside an odd wooden box on the bed. "What is that, Li-Li?"

"I'll tell you, but first shut the door." Sibila softly closed the door behind her and then walked over to the bed. "There should be a piece of paper with a diagram on the floor under my bed."

Sibila still looking at the odd box asked, "How did it get -"

"I'll explain everything but please get it and place it in front of me," Liara cut in.

Sibila shook her head and crawled under the bed where she saw the paper up towards the wall. Next to the paper was an oversized art book on elious. This was an asari technique of using three colors to create a feeling or mood. Typically the artist would choose the colors based off the individual who they were painting for. "Oh, elious! When was the last time that you painted using that technique, Li-Li?"

"What?" Liara sounded tired.

"When was the last time that you painted?" She shouted while crawling out from under the bed.

"I've started a new one just this week. I thought that I would make a companion piece for Mother to compliment the one that she has in her bedroom. You know the one to the right of her bed."

Sibila's head popped out and as she placed the paper on the box, she could see that her cousin was exhausted. "Oh, I love that painting! I wish that you would do one for me."

"Well, if I can get out of this," Liara motioned to the box. "You might get your wish as a birthday present."

Sibila began to rap on top of the box just as Liara's nose began to itch. "What is this anyway?" Sibila asked, but Liara was too busy rubbing her nose against the maroon bed spread to answer. The sight made Sibila laugh as she helped her cousin with the itch, "How do you get yourself in these messes?" Just then the door began to open so Sibila, in a panic, placed her hands in openings on the other side of the box and said, "This is a fun game, Li-Li."

Liara looked on in horror as Sibila smiled at her Theia entering the room.

As the Matriarch walked in she saw the two young asari with the box on the bed and their hands inside. "Hello Sibila, I thought that I heard your voice earlier. How is my beloved sister?"

Sibila tried to look casual, "Mother is splendid, thank you. She is on Illium at this moment preparing my new apartment, Theia."

Liara's mother, the Matriarch Benezia, slowly came farther into the room looking at the box. "Give her my blessings and tell her that she should visit once she returns home."

"Of course, I would be honored to deliver your blessings and invitation."

The Matriarch touched the box and Liara caught her breath, "Liara, what is this?"

"This?"

"Yes, this."

"Oh," Liara struggled to think of something but she was never one to outright lie to her mother.

Sibila on the other hand, "Theia, it's a human game called … uhm, holes & hands. I thought that Liara would find it interesting to play."

"I see." The Matriarch raised an eyebrow as she ran her finger down the side towards Liara. "Hmm. Well. I won't keep you two from your," The Matriarch looked at the box suspiciously, "game." As the Matriarch turned to leave, she stopped and without turning back said "Liara, please remember that for dinner we have a reservation at-"

"Yes, mother." Liara didn't normally cut her mother off, but she was so hungry that any mention of Korain, her and her mother's favorite restaurant, was just too much. "I promise to be there."

The Matriarch knew that something wasn't right but she left her daughter to work through it. The truth was that she knew that if she stayed any longer she wouldn't be able to keep from smiling at the dilemma her daughter and now her niece were in.

As the door closed behind the Matriarch, Sibila smiled with a Cheshire grin while Liara had a sick look on her face. "That was close," Sibila said as she tried to remove her hands from the box. "Sometimes I think I am the genius and not you!" The harder she tried to free them the tighter the box held them.

Liara watched her cousin trying to free her hands and couldn't help but place her chin down on the box and look up at Sibila as she struggled, "Having a problem, genius?"

Sibila frowned at Liara, "Ha-ha! Why can't I get my hands out?"

"Why did you put your hands in?" Liara asked as her head dropped on top of the box. "By the Goddess, now we are both stuck!"

"I panicked! I didn't want you to be caught with your hands stuck in this, this, whatever this is."

"So having us both stuck in this, this was better?" Liara mimicked her cousin.

"Li-Li! Get me out of this," Sibila said as she struggled to get free.

"Siby, don't move around or touch anything in the trap box," Liara instructed. "It is a replica of a prothean-"

"Prothean?" Sibila groaned. "That explains it. How did you get a prothean trap box?"

"It isn't an actual prothean trap but a replica," Liara corrected her. "It is designed after the X5 traps that are commonly found in some of the ruins. I am studying how to set them as well as extract myself if I get caught in one."

"And how is that working out for you?" Sibila asked sarcastically. "Oh. No. Wait. Let me guess."

Liara tried to answer as she used her mouth to turn the _how-to _paper around so she could review the design, "I khew cht em dig."

"I'm sorry, I don't speak paper. Let me see if I can find that language on my translator … oops, I need HANDS for that!"

Liara used her tongue to free her lips from the paper and answered "You don't need to be rude. I know what I'm doing, mostly …. I just have to find the internal trigger and turn it just so …" Liara drifted off as she went back to work inside the box.

"Well at least we have a couple hours for you to figure this out before my flight to Illium."

"Illium?"

"Yes, Illium. Remember? I leave in a few hours." Sibila was ten years older than Liara and had accepted a position on Illium in order to fly the coop. She adored her mother, was proud to be from Armali and had even played on the skyball team there along with Liara but she was ready to start experiencing life. Life away from her mother's watchful eye as well as the community ... It was not easy being a T'Soni in Armali. Expectations were high.

"A few hours?" Liara said without really listening as she continued to work on the box.

A holo of the greatest player, Marcella T'Loak, was on Liara's nightstand and her cousin's first true crush. "Oh, Marcella!" Both the cousins had hoped that the Armali team would go into the Cruor League but that had not happened. Liara was a bigger fan of the sport and adored the Serrice Delphinus team so much that it would have been a struggle giving that team up for the Armali Venitrux team during the Cruor season ... but she would have done it. That sacrifice, however, was not required as the head of the Cruor League disqualified the submission based off the design of the field. If the Venitrux wanted to leave the Fleo League and join the Cruor League they would need a stadium and the city of Armali rejected the proposal as they did not want to see the current field with its gardens, waterfalls, beautiful seating that was also used for the Armali Orchestra destroyed for a more sterile oversized stadium. So in the off-season the two along with their mothers attended games in the Armali Skyball Field and in-season they attended the Serrice Delphinus Skyball Stadium. "Did you hear that she has taken a bondmate? An actual daer!" Sibila frowned as her cousin was preoccupied ... "Li-Li! Go ahead and ignore me! After all, after today we will be worlds apart."

Liara stopped, looked up with a worried look, muttered "Is that today?" and returned her attention back to the box.

"You forgot? Li-Li, you will have us out, right? I mean …" It was then that Sibila realized her cousin was still wearing the same pale violet dress that she had on the night before when Sibila dropped her at home. "Liara, how long have you been stuck in this box?" Liara ignored the question and kept working on the trap, "Liara?"

"I can't talk right now," Liara dropped her head even lower so as not to show her concern.

"Oh, by the Goddess! We are going to die in this box!"

"It's just our hands, Sibila!"

"Okay, so our hands will die in this thing. I feel so much better now. After all, turians don't really want asari with hands." Just then the piece of paper floated to the floor as Liara struggled with the box. "Shall I get that for you? Oh,wait. Silly me, my hands are busy at the moment!"

Liara looked up at her cousin a little annoyed, "Siby, I am trying to focus. I think that I may be close to figuring this out. And what is it about turians with you?"

"At least turians, unlike protheans, still exist."

"Yes, but what you want with turians is not what I want with protheans."

"Thank the Goddess. That would be … well … is there even a name for that?"

Liara smiled as she continued feeling about the trap, "I would tell you but then I might find myself with a new name. I think I'll stick with Li-Li from you."

"So there is a name? Oh, tell me!"

Liara laughed at her cousin as she took a break to rest her hands. "No."

Sibila could see the fatigue on her dearest friend and knew that she needed rest. "I'm afraid to ask, but how long have you been stuck in this?"

Liara unconsciously stuck out her lower lip in a pout and whispered, "When did you drop me off?"

"Oh, Li-Li! You must be tired and … have you even slept?"

"Maybe a couple hours altogether, but what I really want is food and the bathroom."

Sibila had, after squatting on the floor for a quarter of an hour, rose up and stretched out on the bed with her hands in front of her. "Well I refuse to worry. Wake me when we are free," she had half-joked. As Liara moved about the box, Sibila closed her eyes and soon she was asleep. Sibila woke up after an hour to see her cousin fast asleep with her head resting on the bed between her arms. "Great. Miss scientist. Master genius. Hello?" Sibila shook her head as her cousin stayed sleeping so she began to feel around the box herself. "I bet I can figure this out." She could feel small little nubs, grooves, wires, wheels and a few minutes into her searching heard a click. "I got it!"

Sibila's triumphant shout woke up Liara, "What?"

"I figured this out!" Sibila grinned as she went to pull her hands out. They moved just slightly and then another click was heard on her side of the contraption. "What?"

"Please don't tell me that you turned … touched-" Sibila began to tear up and Liara softened her tone to try comforting her as best she could. "It's okay, Siby! Really. I promise that I will get us out."

"I was just trying to - " Sibila stopped talking as she began to feel a slight tingling in the tips of her fingers. "Liara, what is that tingling?"

"Tingling?" Liara asked.

"Don't you – ouch!" Something in the box pinched her. "Did you just pinch me?"

Liara tilted her head as she tried to look at the paper now upside down on the floor next to her. As she scanned down the paper, Sibila was making little squeal like noises as the box came alive on her side … Liara's eyes stopped on a portion of information and half-whispered, "Oh, no."

"Oh, no, what?"

"What?"

"Oh, no, what?" Sibila was starting to panic.

"Nothing." Liara tried to calm her.

"Nothing? Li-Li, is this thing about to take my hands?"

"No." Liara seemed to be focused even harder on the box. "Not exactly."

"Not exactly? Liara? Should I be worried?" Her hands were starting to sting and her eyes began to water. "Did you buy a trap that keeps fingers? Who does that?"

"I think I figured this out."

"Isn't there some kind of –ouch- safety release for things li-eek-ke, oh, Goddess. Please don't let me end –aaugh- life without fingers!"

"They don't have safety releases! Don't you think I looked? Why did you have to touch things that you don't understand?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. –ooh- This coming from –eek- the asari with her –ow- hands where? –ee- I think it is –oooh- getting wor-"

Downstairs Matriarch Benezia was in her reading room, curled up in her favorite lounge chair and reading the philosophy of the Matriarch Aello when she heard a loud scream followed by a cracking sound from upstairs. Benezia's biotics flared as she dropped the reading pad and headed up to her daughter's bedroom. As she ascended the staircase she gave a biotic push to Liara's bedroom doors knocking them open as she raced in to see the two asari rubbing their hands and sprawled on the floor. Sibila's hands were a darker shade of blue than usual and Liara was flushed.

"Mother?" Liara was shaken.

Sibila smiled weakly, "Sorry for disturbing your peace Theia. I got excited playing Holes & Things. I won."

"Don't you mean Holes & Hands?" The Matriarch corrected as she tried to hold back laughing. "Is that why you have the bluer hands than Liara?"

"Uh ..." Sibila smiled weakly and looked at Liara.

The Matriarch picked up the box and after examing it closer, "Isn't it funny how this human game looks so remarkably close to the prothean trap X5?" Liara looked down at her hands as her mother continued to turn the box around until she revealed a hidden slot on the bottom, opened it and pulled a latch. The trap's top opened up. "Hmmm, strange. Humans must be closer to the protheans than other species, what with their games mirroring traps. Liara, you might want to study a human when you get a chance. Who knows what prothean secrets you might find in a human's mind."

Both Liara and Sibila looked at the box now completely unlocked and splayed open as the Matriarch placed it back on the bed. She looked at both the girls with a smile and then left them alone with the defeated box between them.

Liara picked up the box and studied what her mother had revealed, "A safety release, of course."

Sibila punched Liara on the arm, "I could have lost my hands!"

"No, just your fingers," Liara corrected.

"I thought that you had checked for a safety release? Isn't that what you said?" Sibila then mimicked Liara, "Don't you think I looked?"

Liara ignored the impersonation and turned the box over, "It's good to know that there is a safety on this though. Although, I didn't really need it …" She grinned as she added, "I figured out how to set us free without it."

"I would clap for you but I still can't feel my hands," Sibila sarcastically praised. Liara shut the box up and re-set it, looking into one of the holes. "Please don't tell me that you are thinking about doing it again."

Liara moved the box over to her desk, where she kept her favorite sweets _Sokolatí_ and as she hungrily ate one tried to multi-task, "Fst ik msy-"

Sibila shook her head, "If I don't speak paper what makes you think I speak sokolatí?" She took the half-eaten sweet from Liara, placed it back on the messy desk, took her hand and started guiding her towards the bedroom doors. "Let's grab some real food in the kitchen before you faint. You look a little pale from your prothean dig trap site adventure."

Liara gave a little laugh and shove as she headed for her washroom, "Bathroom first, then the kitchen!"


	3. Zombie Dead!

In the kitchen Hannah was starting to prepare dinner and Pierce was on the front porch sneaking a smoke. Just as he lit his Djeram cigarillo he saw his kid coming down the street with her two friends, Ricky and Tyler. His smile faded as it became clear that she was limping while leaning on Ricky with Tyler busy circling his bike around the two as the trio slowly made their way. The boys sounded like they were returning heroes, with Pierce catching the words "awesome", "kablam", "bloody", "kick" and "face". Pierce began slowly walking towards the trio, picking up the pace, heart beating hard against his chest as her injuries became even clearer. Her clothes were torn with blood and dirt ground in, while her new Savannah Sand Gnats baseball cap was missing its bill. But it didn't stop there, she had a black eye, scratches on her right arm, blood was smeared under her nose, on her chin and in her hair.

"Eli, what happened?" Pierce asked as he dropped the thin cigarillo and carefully lifted his daughter up into his arms. "Who did this to you?"

"I said Shepard was fearless, didn't I Ricky?" Tyler shouted as Ricky grinned. "She whooped that boy! If Broder hadn't stopped her, pulled her off … I bet that boy would be in the hospital. Or maybe even dead!"

Ricky nodded, "Yah, dead. Zombie dead! Broken nose zombie dead!"

Tyler hopped around on his bike, "Broken face zombie dead with blood oooooooozing dead!" He lost his balance and tipped over onto the ground. Pierce looked down to see the boy sprawled under his bike but smiling up to show that he wasn't hurt. He got up, carelessly brushed the dirt off and then re-mounted his bike, "Shepard could'a put him the grave … zombie punch!"

"I'm okay daddy, honest." Shepard said above her friends' remarks, embarrassed and trying to calm her father's worried look, despite the injuries. She tried to smile, which unfortunately revealed a tooth missing, causing Pierce to grimace, "Oh, shit Eli! What's preacher woman gonna say?"

Her two friends continued their "really, really double dead with a zombie macaroni booger dead!" while Shepard went to pull out her missing tooth from her jean pocket carefully, causing her father to adjust how he was carrying her so she had access. The movement was hurting her but she was stubborn, and once she had the tooth she held it up and smiled. Pierce couldn't help but laugh and she clenched her hand shut and placed her head on his shoulder.

"..triple double dead with zombie goop and pizza worms for eyes dead!" Tyler laughed.

Pierce looked at the two little boys who continued trying to zombie one up each other and he couldn't help but teasingly whisper to his daughter, "These are really your friends, Eli?"

Shepard shifted her head on his shoulder, "My zombie goofy friends."

"Of course, I should have guessed?" He laughed as the four reached the Shepard property. What could he do? He knew that he and his daughter were about to face music that would not be danceable to, so he tried to lighten their dead man walking up to the house by sharing in the childish humor.

"Yep, Shepard is tough! She beat up a 14-year-old man!" Ricky cheered on the sidewalk. "He was as big as you, Mr. Shepard! Big with muskles! I mean muscles!"

"Na, don't fib Ricky," Tyler said as he rode around in circles on the street, "He wasn't that big, but he was big and Shep, she sure beat him good! Shep bloodied his nose with a really cool head butt!" Tyler mimicked the head butt and lost his balance again. Boy and bike were once again on the ground. Pierce understood why the kid's pants were dirty with small tears. It wasn't playing hockey, it was his riding skills, or the lack of them.

"What boy?" Pierce asked as he stayed at the edge of the property, putting off the inevitable.

Shepard put her arm around her dad and put her head closer to his neck as Tyler explained, "This goober from Chicago, Illy … nos?"

"Illinois," Ricky corrected.

"That's what I said," Tyler stuck out his tongue. "Anyways … he thought he was tougher than us, calling Shep names and then picking on E-wackie … She zo-"

"Zombie dead him," Pierce stopped him. "Yes. I get the point."

Just then Hannah came out on the front porch looking for Pierce. "Oh, double shit! Eli, we are toast."

Hannah saw Pierce holding Shepard and worry spread across her face as she left the porch towards them. Pierce told the boys to go home and quickly whispered to his daughter, "Just remember champ, we're in this together."

Shepard nodded against his neck as Hannah reached them, "Baby, what happened?" Shepard knew that her mother was worried and as she started to tell her that she was fine, she looked up and saw the worry in her eyes. Shepard hated it when her mother looked worried and felt crushed anytime she made her cry. Afraid to say the wrong thing causing the dreaded latter, Shepard lost her voice. She didn't need to say anything really; the blood, bruises, and black eye said enough … but Hannah lost it when her daughter smiled weakly revealing the missing tooth. "Oh, no! Pierce, her tooth?" Tears welled up as Shepard opened up her dirty hand and the missing tooth moved slightly towards Hannah.

"Well, tooth be told," Pierce tried joking, but Hannah was not impressed and she quickly got the two inside as her husband told her that their daughter had been in a fight. As he placed Shepard on the couch, Hannah raced to the first aid kit and was back by her daughter's side before he had taken two steps from her.

"Baby," Hannah whispered as she began cleaning the blood and dirt off her daughter. "Pierce, please go start a bath for Elizabeth while I take a look at her."

"Eli's okay, Hannah," Pierce said, unsure himself but hopeful that it was just one of those moments in a kids life of scrapes and bruises. He had plenty of those moments growing up in Georgia himself, fond moments actually. He still remembered the time he took on the local bully and paid with a tooth of his own. Yep, this kid was his, he grinned as he stood over the two on the couch. He watched his wife examining their daughter and then saw the beer still behind his chair. A beer would be nice right about now, he thought. _Who you kidding boy, a bottle of whiskey will be needed after all this is over!_

Shepard saw the tears on her mother's face and tried to reassure her, "Really, mom. I'm okay. It's not as bad as it seems. Some of these bruises are from the hockey game, not the fight."

Pierce flinched. _Run old boy, escape while you can!_ he thought as he began to slowly back out of the room.

"What?" Hannah asked, but before Shepard responded Hannah sensed her husband's movement behind her, "Pierce, don't move."

"What?" He tried to sound innocent but knew that she was already starting to piece things together, "I was just going to go sta-"

"Husband, think about where you are treading." Hannah said as she continued to minister to her daughter's injuries. "I would advise honesty if you want peace in this house again."

Pierce dropped his head and mumbled "I told Eli that she could play hockey with her pals this afternoon at the park." How this woman had so much power over him was a mystery. _I'm a grown man, dammit!_ he thought, _I've got just as much right to let my kid go and play! I'm her father after all!_ Pierce looked up to stand his ground when he saw his daughter's black eye, tooth on the coffee table and the preacher woman's watery eyes looking up at him. His head dropped again as he muttered, "I'm sorry."

"So this afternoon when we …" Hannah's voice trailed off as she looked up at her husband, tears forming in her eyes.

Pierce looked into his wife's eyes again and remembered her kisses and her body from earlier, "Woman, you know that what we did this afternoon was honest. I mean, it might have started as a diversion, but once I felt your -"

"Remember what it felt like," Hannah stopped him, wiping her eyes; "You won't be feeling it for a while." Hannah turned back to her daughter who had moaned, "Baby, where do you hurt?"

Shepard slowly raised the left side of her shirt to show bruises at her rib cage section. Hannah caught her breath and began checking her ribs. Pierce angry at himself for feeling guilt, letting his wife scold him like a child and at the fuckwit that hurt his child puffed out his chest and looked down at his wife, "I'm sorry Hannah, but I didn't think … hell, woman … she's a kid. She's supposed to get cuts and scrapes now and again. It's a rite of passage for every kid!"

Hannah removed the mutilated cap from her daughter's head, then held up her daughter's bruised, bloody and tooth missing face, "Is this your idea of cuts and scrapes? She looks like a boxer!" Shepard squirmed as Hannah's grip tightened.

"It's not that bad," Pierce weakly responded as his chest deflated.

"No? Well then let's send her to Pamplona to run with the bulls next year! Or better yet, stow her away on an Alliance ship so she can fight turians! Wait, rite of passage you say? Why stop with turians when there are those … oh, what do they call them? The quarians made them?"

"Geth?" Pierce asked confused.

"Geth! You can strap that old beat up rocket pack you have in the garage on her back and aim her towards the Perseus Veil! She might get a few more scrapes, burn marks, lose a limb even, but that's okay! It's her rite of passage!"

"Momma, fight geth?" Shepard looked confused. "That's silly. Why would I fight things called geth! Daddy, what are geth?"

Pierce couldn't help but laugh at his wife's outburst, "They are zombie aliens with glowing worm eyes and spikey teeth!"

"Pierce!" Hannah fought from laughing and looked back at her daughter who was starting to giggle, "You think that's funny too, my little hoodlum?"

Shepard saw that her mother wasn't laughing and lowered her head, "No, ma'am."

"I would not have approved you playing hockey, especially with boys," Hannah made it a point to look at her husband when she said _boys_, "But while hockey is one thing … fighting? You were fighting instead?"

"I'm sorry, momma. I was just going to play hockey with the boys, uhm guys," Shepard answered as her mother began wiping her face again, "We were beatin' this other team … You should see Broder play. Daddy, he can really -"

"The fight Elizabeth," Hannah would not be sidetracked; no matter how hard either Shepard tried.

"The fight," Shepard sighed, "well, one of the bigger boys on the other team started to pick on me. You know sayin' things like 'girls ain't good for nothin' and just stupid boy things."

"Elizabeth, that is no excuse to fight," Hannah instructed, "people with strong moral character and intelligence can handle ignorance without fighting. I am really disappointed in your behavior."

Shepard grabbed her mother's hand that was wiping her face, "But I did ignore what he was saying. And I guess because I wasn't fighting back the boy started picking on E-wackie … I mean Ewald. Telling him that he was ugly, stupid and …" Shepard stopped midstream and lowered her face.

Hannah raised her daughters face up by the chin again, "And?"

"He called him a bastard," Shepard half-mumbled with her eyes fighting back tears.

"Elizabeth that is no reason to resort to violence, you know that." Hannah responded. "And you are not to swear."

"Hannah, she was just …" Pierce started to defend his daughter, as he sat in his oversized leather chair, but the look on his wife's face shut him up. "Fine," he mumbled as he rose back up and grabbed the empty beer bottle, "I'll go start her bath, if you don't mind."

Hannah did a double take at the bottle in his hand, shook her head then turned back to her daughter and checked the area where her tooth used to be, "We'll need to see the dentist tomorrow as well as the doctor." The sound of running water from the bathroom was heard as Hannah continued checking out her daughter's injuries.

The room grew quiet and the light outside faded, the streetlights starting to come on and as the room began to darken, Hannah turned on the lamp behind Shepard. The young girl couldn't help but feel good as her mother nursed her but wished that she wasn't upset. There was something about Hannah that made Shepard want to protect her mother. Shepard was too young to really grasp what she felt, her need to make Hannah happy, to keep Hannah safe and at peace was always there. Her mother always appeared strong and in control, but Shepard even as a child sensed her mother's vulnerability.

As Hannah gently stood her daughter up and started stripping her down to her underwear in the living room, Pierce shut the curtains. "Her bath is ready, Hannah."

"Mommy," Shepard choked out, "I'm really sorry. I know that fighting was wrong, but it was awful. When Ewald started to cry … I don't know, the boy started to laugh at him and then so did others. The fuckwit even spit on him … I just couldn't …."

Hannah looked at her husband, "Nice … One of your words, husband?" Pierce rubbed the back of his neck, squinted and then sat in his chair. "Elizabeth Whisper Shepard, what that boy did was wrong, but you were also wrong in using your fists! I will not have a violent daughter. Do you hear me?" Hannah cupped Shepard's face in her hand, "Why do we not fight?"

Shepard looked at her mother, "They that take the sword shall perish with the sword."

"Don't ever forget that." Hannah admonished her and then gathered up her daughter's dirt and blood stained clothes. Shepard standing just in her underwear, bruises on her legs now also displayed, began to softly cry.

"Hannah," Pierce said as he sat forward. "She was just sticking up for someone weaker."

Hannah shook her head, "Pierce, she should have looked for another way to protect Ewald. Violence is not acceptable. What happens next time some-" Hannah stopped, realizing that her daughter was crying and when she saw the tears along with all the bruises couldn't help but soften her tone. "Shh, baby, please don't cry." Hannah got on her knees and looked at her daughter eye to eye, "I love you Elizabeth, and I understand that you were trying to protect a dumb boy!" Hannah normally didn't make jokes so it never failed to make either Pierce or Shepard laugh when she did. "I just don't want your life to be filled with bad things like violence. I want you to grow up and be a ballerina or a pianist or even a mechanic if you want … Anything but a soldier, boxer or zombie killer!" She kissed her daughter on the nose, wiped away the tears on her cheeks, "Now stop laughing and take your bath … my whisper that shouted today." Hannah smiled and then turned to her husband who was also laughing, "You and your daughter are grounded for a month for your dishonesty and her fighting. While you Ms. Shepard have trash duty for the next two weeks for swearing and you Mr. Shepard will sleep in the guest bedroom for the same two weeks … and don't ask why. Everyone understand?"

Both Shepards nodded and as Hannah tossed the dirty clothes at Pierce and collected all of the nursing items, she directed Shepard to take a bath again and then went into the kitchen. Pierce looked at his daughter, bruised, bandaged and contrite. He placed the clothes on his chair, went over to her and knelt down on one knee, "Eli," he whispered, "I am very proud of you. You stood up for your friend and that is important."

Shepard still had tears coming down her cheeks and as she wiped them away she whispered, "Mom is mad at me … I've disappointed her."

"No Eli," Pierce kissed his daughter on the forehead, "She just doesn't want you to think that violence is the answer. Your mom wants you to look for other ways to stop people from being ugly. I know that sometimes words just aren't enough, but you should use your wits first and your fists last. Understand?"

Shepard nodded as she could hear her mother in the kitchen opening the oven, "Dad, I couldn't stop punching him. I was so mad! I'm sorry that I lost my temper, I'll try and do better next time."

"Pierce, please help me get dinner prepared." Hannah called from the kitchen. "Baby, go take your bath."

Pierce gave his daughter a butterfly kiss on her cheek, causing her to giggle as she pulled away from him. "Preacher woman and I are very proud of you Eli … don't you ever doubt that."

As he walked out of the room, Shepard limped over to the big picture window. She could hear her parents whispering in the kitchen and she hoped that her mother would not be upset for too long. As their whispers continued, Shepard peeked out the curtains to look at the stars which were shining bright this evening and just as she was about to turn away, a shooting star raced across the sky. Shepard closed her eyes and made a little girl wish.


	4. Sitruuna & Confessions

"I wish …" Liara stopped as Sibila raised the pot of sitruuna over her cup. Liara slowly turned the cup counter-clockwise as the warm amber liquid filled it while the girls recited a poem of a lover's caress as the liquid fell. Just as her cousin raised the spout, Liara picked up a silver mallet and gently tapped a chime that sound like a stone skipping water followed by both girls removing their head bands, worn specifically for the ritual, then lowering their heads as they whispered "L'mangoe Athame Perasks". Sibila then placed the pot between them and said a word of respect to her cousin before she sat. Both girls lit candles that were sitting in holders of adama, which resembled diamonds but with flecks of blue that moved. Liara as the youngest also lit the incense hanging over the table. Then she picked up the pot and the ritual repeated with her pouring liquid into her cousin's cup.

The cousins had decided to stop at their favorite sitruuna house, Pikria, which also happened to be just a few steps from the Armali port entrance. Sitruuna, an asari tea known for its soothing powers, was traditionally shared by asari about to mate and had strict rituals in the name of the goddess Athame to be followed. With the asari now mating with other species the ritual was now shared on a much less intimate term, but still followed out of tradition. Both the girls loved the ritual as much as the tea.

The bulk of Benezia's wealth came from this commodity. She was the owner of six sitruuna leave plantations scattered around the asari galaxy that produced the highest quality due to the soil and the T'Soni process. Such was the reputation that sitruuna houses that carried the tea of T'Soni were considered the finest and getting reservations at these houses were made months in advance. Liara and Sibila didn't need reservations at Pikria because Sibila's mother owned it. As Liara finished pouring tea into her cousin's cup she recited a poem of a lover's taste while Sibila lit the candles surrounding the incense and the girls settled into their seats.

Sibila slowly sipped her tea as she looked at her hands which were starting to return to their natural color, "Okay, what is your wish?" She prodded her cousin.

Liara put down her cup, stretched and after a few minutes, "I would love to find Ilos."

Sibila laughed, "Ilos? You have one wish and it is to go somewhere musty and dusty? Liara, you are 87 years old and here you are still focused on the protheans. When will you finally get bored with the past and fascinated on the present? I mean, what has your studies gotten you except numb hands, a bloody tongue and remember the time-"

Liara remembered every setback but the bloody tongue really didn't really count, sorta. It happened 10 years prior when she had found an old prothean piece of jewelry on a dig site. It was quite intricate and was to be worn in a head dress, but somehow as she tried to set it in place on her head it had come undone and not only busted her lip but her tongue as well. "Oh Sibila, that was an accident that could have happened with any piece of jewelry."

"Uh, right … I've been attacked by regular old asari jewelry," Sibila teased. "I'm just saying this whole prothean fixation that you have may be the death of you."

"Well, maybe." Liara smiled, "But no one has been to Ilos since the protheans. I know that it will probably never happen, but just think of the history, the art ... the knowledge ... the secrets that must be waiting there."

"I know what's waiting there. Bigger box traps!"

Liara couldn't help but give a slight laugh as they both rubbed their hands. "I'm serious!"

"So am I!" Sibila couldn't help but see poor Liara trapped in a big box or worse. "I can just see your future. Somewhere you are stuck in some prothean trap to rot! I can see that happening! And you will never meet some glorious creature there to seduce … like you would on Illium."

"Sibila, you are being silly! Ilos could advance our understanding of them and maybe even explain why they went extinct."

"Oh, Liara," Sibila said, "The protheans probably went extinct because they were boring. B-O-R-I-N-G! Or they were killed by one of their jewelry pieces or worse, they were unable to use their hands!"

If anyone else talked to Liara the way that Sibila did, she would have been upset, but Sibila had been her best friend since she was little. Her best friend was not only the daughter of Benezia's sister, Tatiaria, but the keeper of many of Liara's secrets. It had been hard on Liara since she was not only the off-spring of the Matriarch, but also a pureblood. Up until her 40th birthday there were asari that seemed wary around her, worried that she may be an ardat**-**yakshi until she passed the age of "knowing". Both her and her cousin also shared the burden of just being a T'Soni ... the asari in the corallium circle, twelve families of extreme privilege and wealth, were held to the highest of standards and the T'Soni's were part of that circle.

Now here they were about to say goodbye as Sibila had accepted a position in sales for an asari pharmaceutical company called Oneiroi on Illium. As she had earlier informed Benezia, her mother had already flown there from Armali to Nos Astra and purchased a nice apartment for her only daughter. She was still there purchasing furniture and setting up a fund while Sibila stayed behind to spend a few days with her best friend and cousin.

"Why don't you come with me?" Sibila asked. "We could be roommates again like when we attended the University?"

This idea did not appeal to Liara. She adored her cousin but they were polar opposites with Sibila being outgoing, party-loving and pleasure seeking while Liara was more reserved, studious and slightly aloof. During the six years that the cousins studied at the Serrice University together ... Sibila studying business management and economics while Liara studied bioengineering and environmental sciences with an additional course in elious they shared an apartment. Sibila didn't know how her cousin could carry the work load that she did and was constantly telling her to drop some classes. There were times that Liara hid in her bathroom to study while Sibila threw a party, banging on the door for her cousin to come out. It was during these times that she wished that she'd stayed at the Matriarch's small villa located in the exclusive area of Serrice called Politia. She had contemplated using the residence but her cousin had talked her out of it as she reminded her that both the Matriarch and Tatiaria used it quite frequently … well, she finally chose to live with her cousin in a two-bedroom apartment located near the University instead. Liara had found that she loved the sense of freedom, coming home whenever she wanted, not living up to being Matriarch Benezia's daughter with all the acolytes roaming the house or saying the blessing at dinner … ok, she still said the blessing but it wasn't in front of the Matriarch and guests.

She loved that freedom but every weekend she was heading back home to the Matriarch and spending her academic breaks from the University on holiday with her mother. The fact was she hated being away too long from her mother. Once Sibila had graduated and moved back home to work at the BioFlux, an asari company that researched and developed high end bio-amps, Liara moved into the Politia villa for her remaining four years but more times than not she took the three-hour shuttle back to Armali and the Matriarch's primary home located on the hills of Consilium. When her mother had commented on the time spent to travel back and forth, Liara said that she used it to study. That was true … Liara also took a private car in the shuttle and with a cup of sitruuna or kaffee she would either do her studies or sketch. After she had graduated she returned home and the following year she was sent to the premier T'Soni plantation located on Lusia to learn the process. For the next seven years she lived there with the Matriarch joining her every other season. Once when the Matriarch had arrived to find her daughter covered in dirt she had laughed and reminded her of the time that she had scolded her for digging in the Serenite Park across from the T'Soni estate. "Siby had told me that there were people that lived underground," Liara half giggled as she placed a hand on her cheek. "You gave me a book after that on the protheans ... remember? You said that they were here before us and not the ... oh, what did she call them? The wiggleers?" Benezia laughed at the mention of Sibila's made up people and hugged her daughter as they headed into the main house.

Liara had enjoyed learning how to properly identify source plants to create new tea seedlings, and then develop those seedlings in the nursery for two years to protect it from the elements … Once they were strong enough; they were planted in open fields where they grew carefully tended for the next cycle. Liara loved how there were huge shade trees scattered about to give relief to the plants and she would take her sketch book and sit under one as she sketched one of its sisters shading rows of these tea plants. These sketches were some of her mother's favorites and were put on display in her reading room next to other sketches of trees from Luisa. Liara had once asked her mother where those sketches came from but the Matriarch would just smile and change the subject.

Once the leaves were ready they would be handpicked, dried, rolled and depending on if it was to be used as a tea or medicine it would be either ready for market or allowed a longer fermentation and then re-dried. The first tea crop of every year was celebrated in the asari world with the Chaironton Festival. Liara had always loved this holiday the most but now that she had participated from beginning to end in the tea with its wonderfully rich flavor and aroma she was dancing even more joyously with her mother downtown on the streets of Armali. This was the end of her apprenticeship as well but she begged her mother to work through the next cycle from seedling to table and the Matriarch had laughed as she approved. Liara might have stayed on but her mother had other training sessions in mind so she had packed up and returned to Thessia.

As Liara remembered standing on the porch of the main house looking out at the fields and trees with her mother, Sibila snapped her out of it with "Think about it … we could go dancing at all the clubs and maybe seduce a few turians?"

Liara shifted in her chair nervously, "You know that I have my work, my studies here. Besides, I could never see me living on Illium."

"You at least have to promise to visit," Sibila pouted. "Maybe on your way to your next dig site? Can you at least promise me that?"

As Liara was about to promise, Sibila touched her arm and leaned across the table to whisper "Don't look now, but the professor T'Lemk just walked in."

Professor Nicia T'Lemk taught Asarian Heuristic at the University of Serrice and was a follower of Matriarch Dilinaga's writings. Almost a half of a century ago she had been one of Liara and Sibila's professors at the University where Liara had developed a mad crush. Sibila was glad to see that her cousin could actually like someone, but just wished that it wasn't this person. The professor kept many lovers and was a staunch believer that the asari were the only species that mattered and that the other species were only to be tolerated. She had once said in her class, "When two asari mate their off-spring make the brightest, strongest and … well, even better lovers. Their minds are much stronger and have an amazing ability to go deeper into the body … into the mind of another." As she said the last part she ran her hand across her stomach as she looked down at Liara who blushed.

Sibila who was seated next to her cousin asked, "What about ardat**-**yakshi's then? Aren't they a result from that type of mating as well?" She felt her cousin shift as she dropped her head and Sibila hated herself for asking, but it was too late to take it back.

The professor narrowed her eyes as she looked at Sibila, "The ardat**-**yakshi is a myth. Don't tell me that you believe in childish stories, Miss T'Soni." Sibila shot a fake grin at the professor but from that day on the lines were drawn between the two_._

Liara had felt her stomach heat up when the professor had looked at her and said those things. That moment quickly passed as her cousin threw the verbal water on her. She wanted to punch her, but instead all she could do was hang her head in embarrassment. _What does it matter_, she thought at that moment. _Why would Professor T'Lemk desire me, anyway? Don't be so foolish, Liara_. But if Sibila threw water on the possibilities, then the Matriarch hit it with a tidal wave. Matriarch Benezia after reading the professor's published works on her beliefs, publicly criticized the professor for writing such "drivel" and called her "foolish and irresponsible" for encouraging maidens to be more military driven and teaching the superiority of the asari over all other species.

"Liara T'Soni?" The professor smiled as she approached the T'Soni table. "It is so nice to see you again." As was custom in a sitruuna house, the professor stopped two feet from the table and waited for the words of acceptance. Had it been up to Sibila she would have stood there until she rotted but Liara stood and half-whispered the words of acceptance.

The professor smiled as Liara recited the words and when she was completed she walked to her and pressed her cheek to Liara's before she took an empty chair and sat next to her. _Any closer and you would be in her lap_, Sibila thought.

"Professor T'Lemk, how nice to see you," Liara said self-consciously as the professor placed her hand on Liara's leg. "What are you doing here in Armali?"

"I am visiting friends," Nicia smiled. "I heard that Armali had much lovelier views."

_Yes we do ... and you are not from here so you are not that lovely ... now go away_, Sibila thought as the professor smiled predatorily at her cousin.

"Speaking of which … You look lovely, Liara." Nicia slightly raised the hem of the dress to reveal Liara's thigh, "White always looks so nice on you … it seems to compliment your skin so perfectly."

"That is nice of you to say," Liara blushed as she pulled her dress back down and looked nervously at her cousin. "Nic-, I mean Professor T'Lemk, you remember my cousin."

"Are you busy later this evening?" The professor smiled as she raised the dress slightly up again, "I would love to get your opinion on a new elious painting at the Farinah Museum in Serrice."

Liara grabbed the professor's hand and placed it on the table, "I would like that but I have to meet the Matriarch after my cousin leaves for Nos Astra."

_You know, this cousin sitting here apparently invisible_, Sibila thought as the professor continued to ignore her and focus on Liara.

"Ah, yes. Matriarch Benezia," Nicia said, "And how is the Matriarch? I hope she is doing well."

_"_She's fine and still disagrees with your drivel," Sibila muttered under her breath as she raised her cup to her mouth.

Liara gave her cousin a quick scolding look before she turned back to the professor, "The Matriarch is doing well, thank you. Do you remember Sibila T'Soni?"

Nicia finally looked at Sibila, flashed a false smile and turned back to Liara, "So maybe we could have dinner together this week?"

"This week is quite busy, maybe next week?" Liara countered.

"Next week it is," Nicia grinned, "Shall I call you or will you call me?"

"I'll call you."

"That's fine; I'll be looking forward to hearing from you."

Nicia touched her cheek to Liara's as she slid her hand just below Liara's left breast, "How do you always smell so wonderful?" Liara stopped Nicia's hand from going farther, blushed and gently pushed her away. The professor got up, flashed another false smile at Sibila and then strolled away to rejoin the three matrons that she had arrived with.

Sibila gave a quizzical look, "What was that all about?"

Liara nervously picked up her cup and spilled her drink, "It's nothing."

"Oh, by the Goddess!" Sibila placed her hand over her mouth in disbelief as the light came on. "How long?" Liara ignored the question as she wiped up the spill. Sibila grabbed her hand with the napkin and repeated the question, "Liara, how long have you been seeing her?"

"Just a few weeks," Liara answered as she grabbed another napkin.

Sibila waited for more information but Liara went back to wiping up the spill. Sibila looked over where the professor was and saw the professor looking at Liara who was still focused on the spill. "Li-Li, we are cousins … no, we are best friends and I've told you everything and you didn't tell me?"

Liara looked into Sibila's eyes and saw the hurt, "It happened that day that we were to meet at Farinah Museum to see the Dilinaga exhibit, remember? Nicia was there when I arrived and started showing me some of the writings and …"

"And?" Sibila prodded.

"You were running late so we went for a walk together in the park and she was really interested in my work at in the Bioengineering department at the University … as well as my personal research into the Protheans."

"Bioengineering and research, I'm sure." Sibila had wondered if Liara would run into the Professor now that she was teaching at the Serrice University. Liara was the youngest person to ever teach there but with three masters and now working on her Doctorate ... she was more than qualified. Sibila just wished that her cousin would relax more, play more. Looking at her cousin she teased, "So, have you melded?"

"What? Why, we … no." Liara stammered. "Sibila, I am not even ... How could you even think that?"

Sibila laughed and shook her head, "Considering that you were seeing the professor these past few weeks and didn't tell me, do you blame me for wondering? How old is the professor anyway?"

"She is only 376," Liara answered. "Just 289 years older than me. But she doesn't really desire me, or at least she hasn't said that she does, not really."

Sibila looked over to see the professor still looking at Liara and turned back to her dearest friend who was sipping her drink and looking at a crumpled napkin. "Well, if you can't tell that she desires you it may be because you aren't looking in the right direction."

"Sibila," Liara said as she put down her drink, "I find her interesting and the way that she treats me is pleasant, but I don't want anything getting in the way of my work, my studies or my painting. She understands and shares my passion of history, which is all that we have shared." Liara didn't know why she wasn't being totally honest with her closest friend, but she wasn't. Liara and the professor had been intimate but Liara had stopped before it went past physical intimacy. She was attracted to Nicia, but her feelings were not intense enough to meld with her, at least not yet. The time that she spent with Nicia was pleasant and Liara had enjoyed her company as they discussed history, went for walks, kissed and touched, but her mad crush over the past few weeks had softened to a simple maiden attraction and curiosity. She told herself that the relationship was just part of her maiden drive and desire for learning and experiencing new things, nothing more. She didn't want the relationship to intrude on her studies, her everyday life or involve her mother. Maybe that is why she didn't tell Sibila. Liara went back to sipping the remainder of her sitruuna while deep in thought.

Liara finally looked at her dearest friend who was looking back at the professor again and took her hand to regain her attention. As Sibila turned to face her, Liara gently reassured her that the relationship was nothing and as such she didn't think that it warranted her telling her. "I'm sorry if I hurt you," Liara softly said. "I do trust you and if I ever meld, I promise that you will be the second person to know."

"Second? Why not the first?" Sibila pouted again.

"Siby," Liara laughed, "Unless you are the one I am melding with, I think that someone else will know first."

"Good point." Sibila smiled. "Well, I really want to meet that someone! But I will need to warn your lover about your dangerous toys."

Liara giggled, "So you forgive me?"

Sibila accepted the apology, "Just be careful, okay? The professor is a matron and a strong believer in asari dominance, not to mention someone that the Matriarch has publicly disapproved of. She might be doing this to get back at the Matriarch, or worse ... you could get so caught up in her that she turns you into some kind of radical asari-centric and then use you to have an offspring. You know that she is a believer of us rejecting other species and returning back to our own for all relationships and mating."

The thought that Nicia might use Liara against the Matriarch had crossed her mind. But she told herself that she would be careful. The fact that Sibila also had the same thought brought the concern back to the front of Liara's mind, but she just as quickly pushed it to the back. "That won't happen," Liara reassured her best friend. "My only desire is to continue my studies and research on the prothean. You should know that better than anyone."

Twenty minutes later as they walked to the shuttle the two spoke of plans for Liara to come and visit, as well as promises to vidmail each other often. They hugged, said a joint prayer of blessings and then Liara watched her best friend walk away.

Liara knew that she was going to miss her cousin. Sibila was one of the few confidantes that she had and the only one that was not one of her mother's acolytes. Liara then thought of Nicia and prayed that she had not followed her when a hand fell on her shoulder. She sighed, bracing herself for another interaction with Nicia, and as she turned around there stood the Matriarch with two of her acolytes.

Being in the presence of the Matriarch publicly had a way of making Liara feel small, vulnerable and somehow not good enough. Everyone admired and respected her mother, who was considered the leader in the ancient religion of the goddess Athame, revered for her wisdom in philosophy, as well as leading hundreds of acolytes. Benezia encouraged and trained her followers to exemplify all the best qualities of the asari with her extolling the need for them to continue to be the diplomatic voice of council races and advocating for them to take an even greater role in shaping galactic events. Standing in the Armali port, Liara was reminded how even strangers couldn't take their eyes off her mother. But while others had their eyes on the Matriarch, the Matriarch had her eyes on Liara. She was carefully studying her daughter's face and finally broke the silence, "Did Sibila make it to her flight on time, Liara?"

Liara stole glances around the area to see if Nicia was anywhere in sight, "Yes, mother. What has brought you here to the port? I thought that I was to meet you back home."

"There is a change in plans. I am here to greet Councilor Tevos," Benezia answered. "She is returning home from the Citadel for a few weeks to discuss certain political fires and how they should be addressed. Did you come with someone to see Sibila off?"

"No," Liara answered as she took her mother's hand that was extended to her. Benezia then guided her daughter through the busy port, wrapping her arm around her as they walked. "Is the Councilor coming to our home for dinner?"

"Yes," The Matriarch answered as she continued to study her daughter as they walked, "we are having a small dinner party for the councilor and her mate in three night's time. So we will need to have dinner at Korain's another time. I have too much to arrange before the dinner. I hope that you are not too disappointed."

Liara loved spending time alone with her mother but understood that the Matriarch had many demands on her. "No, mother … I understand."

The Matriarch stopped to face her daughter, "You know that I love our time together, don't you?"

Liara hugged her mother, "Of course."

The Matriarch hugged her back and then resumed their walk, "I will need your help in selecting the art to display in the great hall. Can we do that this evening?"

"Of course, mother … what time."

"Two bells after sunset?"

"Two bells."

"Please do not be late tonight."

"Yes, mother," It was considered not only rude, but disrespectful towards a Matriarch if you were tardy in your dealings with them. An off-spring was not exempt and Liara always tried to be early, although she had at times arrived a little late. Her mother would look at her, eyebrow raised and just shake her head. Benezia knew that she was a little too lenient with her daughter, but she adored her. "May I be excused? I have a few things that I need to complete before then."

As Liara started to pull away from Benezia, the Matriarch tenderly pulled her daughter back to her, kissed her on the forehead and whispered, "You are my light, Little Wing." before she turned to walk away. Liara watched her mother and the two acolytes continue on through the port, a path clearing out of respect to the Matriarch as they went. Liara knew that she could never be as admired or respected as her mother, no one could. But what she really wanted was to make her mother proud. Benezia doted on her daughter, but Liara wanted to do something that would earn her mother's praise and affection. To really one day make her proud.

"I don't suppose that you would invite me to this important social gathering?" Nicia whispered in the young asari's ear from behind.

Liara jumped then quickly pulled Nicia behind a pillar so her mother would not see the two together. "I'm sorry Nicia," Liara responded as they were securely out of sight, "But only the Matriarch can extend invitations to her social gatherings. I do not have that privilege or right."

"But surely as her daughter you can bring a guest?" Nicia whispered as she raised Liara's dress slightly and pressed her leg between her thighs.

"I'm afraid not," Liara answered as she caught her breath. "The Matriarch does not allow me to bring someone. I wish that I could invite you, but …" _Another untruth today, is this what growing up means? Keeping truths hidden?_ Liara thought as Nicia kissed her neck.

Liara gently pushed her away and Nicia smiled. "Well, I know how Matriarchs like controlling their environments, so I won't push … at least not in that way." She then massaged Liara's breast as she kissed her goodbye. _Oh by the goddess, if I could miss the party myself._ She thought as she walked through the busy port.


	5. Beauty &the Beast

The Mindoir Port was so busy that Pierce had the kid behind him and holding on to his belt just so he didn't lose her in the crowd and also to protect her. She still had a slight limp and her bruised ribs were still healing so he was careful to not walk too fast. Not that it was an option in the packed walkway. It was day three of their being grounded but they had received a day pass from preacher woman to pick up a package from Earth.

* * *

The previous summer, the Shepards had spent a holiday at Pierce's parents' home in Georgia and while there Grandpa Jack had introduced the two to an old television series called Firefly. Jack had said that he had found a dead ringer for his son and when they saw Mal Reynolds, Shepard cried, "Daddy! Look, it's you!" When they showed Hannah she looked at the actor, "Cute, but he doesn't have your lips." Pierce smiled until his older sister, Toni, grinned, "You mean no plush lips?" _Why did I tell my sister everything_, he asked himself.

He loved going back to Tybee Island ... back to his parents two story farmhouse located next to the Atlantic Ocean and just minutes from the Tybee Island Light Station. It made him smile to see his daughter run through his childhood home with her cousins ... gave him comfort to share coffee with his mother in the kitchen and help his dad on his latest model airplane. Holidays spent in Georgia saw his wife take time with his severely introverted younger sister while he was playfully abused by his oldest sister as her husband sat quietly reading. His sister's choice in a husband had caught everyone off-guard. Toni was an attractive, wild, athletic and loud gal who loved nothing more than to laugh, dance, do shots of tequila and talk shit. Her husband, Dr. Marvin Prescott, was not only a teetotaler but also shy, quiet and reserved as well as twelve years her senior. Pierce loved to tease her that she had married the male version of their sister.

As the evening fell with Toni and the kids going out back to watch falling stars, Jack asleep on the back porch, Marvin reading in the livingroom where Hannah was showing his younger sister, Melanie, how to play "Fur Elise" on the piano ... Elizabeth, his mother, called him into the kitchen.

The kitchen was the heart of this home and it was open to the dining room as well as the back porch. With the warmer breeze this evening his father had opened up the french doors and just shortly after crashed on the couch out there. "How is everything going for you on Mindoir?"

"Good, ma, Hannah's church is still growing, Eli is hitting straight A's and I just got promoted as manager." This made her give a slight smile, "Highland Falls is increasing ... you know that a family from France just moved there and are planting vineyards? Can you believe that? We bumped into them at the market and Hannah just lit up ... you know, talking with others in her native tongue ... So no complaints."

"I'm glad but ... well, I must confess that your old mother really wishes that you would reconsider moving home." She poured them both a cup of coffee. "I hear that it's not safe out there. What with batarians, pirates … Son, if anything happened to you, Hannah or Lil'Bit …"

Pierce hugged his mother as she choked up, "Now mom, nothing is going to happen to us. How many times do I have to tell you that? I would die before letting anyone hurt preacher woman or Eli."

"What weapon would you use? Your plush lips?" Pierce's older sister laughed as she wandered into the kitchen from the back porch and grabbed his cup of coffee.

"Can't you forget I ever told you that?" He laughed as he grabbed his coffee back. "And get your own damn coffee!"

"Mom, tell Pee-Pee to behave!" Toni cried out like a little girl. Mother Elizabeth laughed at her two children while Pierce grabbed his sister by her arms and threatened her life for using his old nickname. Pee-Pee was what she had called him as a little boy because he was constantly wetting his bed up until he was seven. "What's wrong my little Pee-Pee? Are your widdle feelings hurt?" Toni screamed with laughter as her baby brother wrestled her to the ground and began tickling her. "Pierce, stop! Mom!"

Shepard and her two cousins, Aaron and Timmy, raced into the kitchen and Pierce cried out, "Reinforcements! Eli, help me kill this ugly monster!" Eli jumped in as Toni cried out for her sons and then they came yelling into the mess. Jack awakened by the ruckus peeked in out of curiosity. Toni began crying out for Melanie who looked up from the piano in the formal living room.

Hannah laughed, "Do you want to join that mess Melanie?"

Melanie made a face, shook her head and laughed, "I've tried to stay out of their way since I was born. Toni and Pierce are a handful and put them together? No thanks!" Hannah laughed and they returned to the piano lesson.

* * *

"Flight Q-7575 to Nos Astra, Illium departing in 15 minutes at gate 5, Flight Q-7575 to Nos Astra, Illium departing in 15 minutes at gate 5" the announcement rang through the port. Pierce could just make out the Gax Postal Shop opposite gate 8 and he reached down and picked up his daughter. She wasn't as small as she used to be. _I won't be able to keep slinging you around soon_, he thought with a tinge of sadness as he carried her to the shop.

"Daddy, do you think that it will really look like the firefly?" Shepard asked as they maneuvered through the crowd that was starting to thin out in this section of the port.

"At the price your grandpa paid … it better!" Jack had asked Pierce if he had built any models lately and when Shepard told him that he hadn't had time, the old man shook his head. He then told Pierce that he needed to teach his only child how to build models. That it was part of the bonding process and a Shepard tradition. After seeing his father pull Eli in his workroom and tell her about the Red Baron while she assisted him on the replica of Manfred von Richthofen's red Fokker Dr. I triplane, it made him remember all of the times he spent with his dad. He had later told his dad that if he could find a model of the Serenity from Firefly, "pick it up and I'll pay you. I think that Eli would really like that."

A year later and the two Shepards were on their way to pick up their project. Pierce just hoped that the model wasn't too complicated. He didn't want to look too foolish in front of his kid. As if the kid read his mind she said, "Daddy, I hope this isn't too hard to put together. Momma might think we're not too smart if we can't build it right!"

Pierce laughed, kissed his kid and let her down as they entered the postal shop. He saw an empty chair at the big shop window looking out at gates 6-8 and motioned his daughter to take a seat. Shepard ran over and placed her knees on the seat facing the backrest so she could look out the picture window of the shop and watch the crowd passing by.

Pierce took a number, walked over to where his daughter was, stood in front of her seat and looked out the window with her. He had never seen the port so busy but Mindoir was starting to see more and more people migrating there. The Mindoir Nokeic Mining Company was expanding and offering good wages to get more people to transfer off-world, as moving from Earth was called. While it had increased the types of goods that were on Mindoir, it had also brought more of the _sourdoughs_, as the miners were called by the citizens of Highland Falls. The sourdoughs were a rough and tumble type of men that in their downtime loved to drink, gamble and fight. Without another way to let off steam the violence only increased so it didn't surprise Pierce that a whorehouse, called _the Knocking Shop_, had just been opened near the mining base. With the increase of population in Moorland, he just hoped that the seedier and violent part of that town didn't spill out into the quieter neighborhoods of Highland Falls.

Just then a group of whores arrived at gate 7 and as they passed by the window in their painted faces, tight mini dresses and 8-inch heels, Shepard mouthed 'wow' and turned to look at him, "Daddy, aren't those women pretty? But aren't they cold with those short skirts? And how do they walk in those shoes?"

An older man sitting across from them looked at the women and then at Pierce and smiled, "You gotta luv a child's innocence."

Pierce smiled back as he looked at his watch. He had told Hannah that they would be gone for just two hours but with all the traffic and the wait, his ticket was 133 and the counter read 88, it would be more like 3 hours, if he was lucky. _Maybe I should give the preacher a call_, he thought as he looked at his ticket. He told Shepard that he was going to give the preacher woman a call and to stay put, "Don't you go anywhere and if a stranger talks to you … Well, don-"

"I know daddy, I don't talk to strangers." She gave him a look that was a perfect frustrated Hannah look. It made him laugh that every now and then his wife's disapproving look was on his daughter's face. _You had to have that woman from the beach_, he laughed inside. He smiled at his wife's mini-me and then walked into the men's restroom where it was quieter. Shepard returned to people watching when she saw something weird standing by gate 8 counter. She had never seen anything like it before and she slid off her seat and started walking towards it. It was big, at least 8 feet tall, with red eyes and a hump reminding Shepard of the beast from _Beauty and the Beast_, but more reptile like. _It's a Jurassic Beast_, Shepard thought as she got closer to it. Shepard was so fascinated by the creature that she didn't notice how everyone else in the port was given it a wide berth.

The beast saw this little creature slowly limping towards him, black eye, scrapes. She was moving against the current of retreating people and he thought that either she was blind or the bravest little creature that he had ever seen. As she came to a stop in front of him his red eyes focused in. The two looked at each other with neither moving nor speaking for what seemed like 10 minutes. The beast, unlike the child, saw people around them trying to get the girl's attention to motion her away from him. The child instead finally walked closer to the beast, cocked her head in curiosity, reached out and touched its hand.

"Go away," the beast commanded in the deepest voice that Shepard had ever heard.

"You can talk," She marveled as she continued to hold its hand.

"So can you. Now show that you can listen as well. Go away." Shepard continued to hold the creatures hand and began to giggle. The creature sighed, "What is so funny?"

"I don't know. You just look funny ... You look like the Beast."

The creature shrugged and moved to the right. Shepard followed which made the creature move back to the left, which Shepard mirrored again. "Aren't you a human child?"

"No, I'm a kid." Shepard began inspecting the creature's armor. "I bet that's heavy."

"Well, kid. Shouldn't you be with a human adult?"

"My dad's on the phone in the bathroom. Do you have a kid?"

"I'm a krogan," the creature answered. "We don't have children."

Shepard looked up at the krogan with a confused look on her face, "If krakons don't have kids then how are you made?"

"Krogan, not krakons," he sighed again. "We were infected with the genophage -" The krogan stopped as he realized that the human child was too young to understand. So he simply finished, "I don't have children."

"But how are you made?"

"Some krogans have children," he surrendered. "Now go away."

"I thought you were foolin'," Shepard beamed. "Where do kra-, ugh … krogans come from?"

The krogan sighed again, "I don't really like to talk. Go somewhere else." The kid continued to stand in front of him with a curiosity that bugged him but her lack of fear, her courage … that he admired. Here the human adults stayed as far away from him but this child wouldn't move when he commanded it.

He gave a low growl thinking that would scare her away but to his own surprise she mimicked his growl and then giggled, "When you do it … it kinda tickles." The rumble that his growl had created had pushed people farther away, made a couple small kids cry but not this kid. "So, where are ya' from?"

As she continued to wait for her answer, he gave in again, "Tuchanka."

"Tuchanka" Shepard repeated, "I like that name. Tuchanka! I think I'll name my new fish that. Tuchanka."

The krogan smiled, if you could call it a smile. "Any more questions or will you go away now?"

"Are you moving here? My momma and daddy can show you around … and you can come visit our house. I could show you my fish and there is a great place to swim … uh, you do swim, right?"

"No." He responded.

"No?" Shepard squinched her nose, patted his gauntlet, "Well, I'll teach you!"

The krogan saw a human adult looking panicked. "I think that your father is looking for you."

Pierce had finished talking to Hannah just moments before and when he had come back into the shipping store he didn't see his kid. As he exited into the port he saw the krogan right away. Krogans were known to be the most violent and physically powerful of the alien species and everyone was staying as far away from it as they could … everyone but Pierce's 10-year-old daughter. She was clutching its hand and the krogan seemed to be talking to her. Pierce steeled his courage and walked over to where they were wishing that there was a police officer close by. He had never seen or talked to a krogan and he was scared.

"Uh, excuse me …. Uh, my daughter … well," Pierce was tongue-tied. The krogan stood at least a foot and a half taller than him and must have weighed a ton. He had scars on him that told Pierce he had seen some battles in his life and it made Pierce feel like his balls were crawling up into his stomach as the beast looked at him. The eyes were red and very reptilian, making Pierce now feel like he was being sized up for dinner and his balls crawled even higher … right into his throat.

Shepard saw her dad and still clinging to the beast, smiled up at him, "Hi daddy, this is my new friend. Can he come for dinner?"

"Is she yours?" The krogan asked.

"Yes … yes. She's … mine."

_The kid must take after the mother_, the krogan thought. Here this little kid hanging from his arm, rattling on about all the things that she would show him while her father was close to pissing his pants. The krogan took a step closer to Pierce, who instinctually backed up a few steps, "I have no quarrel with you," he said to try and reassure the human. "Do you want her back?"

Pierce felt sick. "I uh, yes please."

The krogan took two steps closer to Pierce as Shepard was now dangling from her new friend's gauntlet. "I need to locate a Sheriff Birgit Hallestrøm. She has a package for me."

"Birgit? Yes … I … of course. I'll call her …. Uh, you won't hurt …"

_Definitely her mother's off-spring, _the krogan thought as he looked down at the kid as she tried un-strapping his gauntlet. "I won't hurt her."

"Daddy, he won't hurt me. He's my friend … uh, what's your name?"

The krogan did not want his presence known on Mindoir so he simply answered, "Just call me Beast, pup."

Shepard giggled then extended her hand, "Hello Beast, my name is Eli and this is my daddy, Pierce."

The krogan carefully took her hand, "Hello Eli." Then he looked at the father, "Pierce".

Pierce debated extending his hand, but those red eyes … well, he excused himself and headed for the security office to call his friend. What package Birgit might have for him was a mystery and Pierce knew that later tonight she was going to have to spill the story. If he lived, that is. He thought about how his daughter was responding to the krogan and he had to shake his head in amazement at her lack of fear. He both admired and worried about her courage, especially when it saw her hanging on a krogan like it was a cute pet.

"I bet you've seen lots of fights," Shepard said to the krogan.

"A few."

"I was in a fight just recently."

"I gathered that." He responded as he looked at her black eye. "I didn't think that you were born with that eye and those bruises."

"Nope," Shepard replied as she raised her shirt to show her bruised ribs. "I got lots of bruises! But my momma was upset and I was grounded for a month."

"Grounded?" the krogan asked as he looked at the dark bruises on the child's ribs.

"I can't leave the house."

"You have a big house," the krogan said looking around the port as the child lowered her shirt.

Shepard laughed, "This isn't my home! Daddy and I were allowed to come here to pick up a model of Serenity, but then we have to go home again. Daddy is grounded with me."

_Yes, she definitely takes after the mother_. The krogan shifted his armor a little and he heard a few gasps in the crowd. With the history of the krogans even the slightest movement from him brought fear from the human colonists. It made the krogan very careful since he was there strictly on business and didn't want to kill anyone unnecessarily.

"So how do you know my Aunt Birgit?"The pup interrupted his thoughts.

"I don't."

"Then why are you asking for her?"

"She has a package for me."

"What is it?"

The krogan shifted again, "A package."

Just then Pierce arrived back staying at least 8 feet away from the krogan, "Sheriff Hallestrøm apologizes for her delay. She says that she should be here shortly. Uh, can I have my daughter now?"

The krogan looked at the girl, "I didn't realize that you thought that you couldn't take her."

"Can he come home with us, daddy? I want to show him my fish. Especially the new one, cause I'm naming it Tuchanka after his home."

"No, honey, he is just passing through." Pierce said as he held out his hand for her.

Shepard looked up at her new friend and hugged him, "Be careful, Beast. If you decide to stay longer … I live on 2001 Verne Street. My momma makes the best chicken dinner so if you get hungry." And with that she went to her father, waved goodbye and was led back to the postal shop.

The krogan watched the child disappear into the crowd and then began to fix his half-opened gauntlet. _I'd like to see you when you are full-grown_, he thought to himself. _You will surely be a sight then. Fearless … and a warrior I suspect_. As he thought of the child hanging from him as the rest of the port drew away from his bulk he made a sound that rippled through the port.

Rarely did his kind laugh when no blood was spilled, but today a krogan laughed.


	6. Dancing Drell

The laughter downstairs disturbed Liara's concentration as she tried to attach the prothean piece to her head dress. Her hands wouldn't stop shaking as she sucked in her lips. If the piece slapped her in the face again she was determined that it wouldn't cut her lip or tongue. She had just finished making up her face and wanted something to compliment her floor-length white dress. It had been made with earth silk and was open at the back, pulled in at her waist with a cerulean blue sash. She could hear guests arriving and wished that she could just stay in her room studying the trap.

She looked over at the box, thinking about the safety release when a soft knock was heard at her door. Liara gave a slight turn and invited the visitor in. One of her mother's acolytes peered in, "Liara, are you ready? The Matriarch says that you should come down."

"Shiala," Liara waved her in, "Can you help me with this?"

Shiala smiled and looked at the piece, "Isn't this the jewelry that …"

"Yes … My lip."

"And tongue, if I remember right."

"But it's so lovely and the history. I want to wear it at least once."

"Well, it's your mouth," Shiala took the piece, "If you bite me jewelry I'll break you in pieces," she warned and then began to adjust it into the head dress.

Shiala had been with the Matriarch almost two centuries as her acolyte and had loved Liara like a younger sister since she was born. She felt protective over the little wonder and missed the days when she could tickle her ... Liara had such a wonderful and contagious giggle but somewhere over the years she had grown a little more sober and Shiala wished that she would hear her giggle more often. But she understood the pressure that Liara felt; even the acolytes felt an intense responsibility to publicly meet the Matriarch's standards. But Liara was also in that Corallium Circle and a T'Soni. It made Shiala glad that she was born to lesser ... born to be a worker and not a leader. Shiala's mother was a field hand on one of Benezia's sitruuna plantations and when Benezia saw the young asari she saw something. Shiala would never forget that day. She had been out picking in the field when Benezia walked by ... Shiala had went down on her knees as she lowered her head causing Benezia to stop. She bent down, lifted Shiala's head with her finger beneath her chin and smiled.

"Shiala?"

"Uh-hum." Shiala with a pin in her mouth was daydreaming of that day as she also focused on the addition.

"Have you … uh, have you ever meld with someone?"

Shiala stopped and looked at Liara, "Whr oo skn?" Liara just looked at her until Shiala removed the pin, "Sorry. Why are you asking?"

"No reason, really."

"Little, I have known you before you were born. You never ask a question without a reason." Liara looked away and Shiala gently turned her face back towards her. "Talk to me."

"Promise to not tell mother?"

"Well," Shiala saw the concern in the young asari's eyes, "as long as it isn't something that will hurt you. I promise."

Liara let out her breath, "I am seeing someone. She is already a matron, desired by many and she is considered to be quite brilliant. She treats me like, well, she doesn't care that I'm a pureblood," Shiala flinched at the ugly word, "It's okay, I know how some people feel, or most really ... But not her. She… she likes that part of me. Really likes it and … and she – she wants to …"

"Meld?" Shiala pulled away from Liara as she thought about what that meant. Asari did not think of melding until they were well past their second century as a rule. Liara had not even lived a century. "Are you ready?"

"I know what you are thinking. I am still a child." She pouted as she pulled away.

"No, not at all … I just want you to be sure. I want your first meld to be special and with someone who you truly feel a spiritual connection to ... and who will not hurt you in the process."

"I do … I think … I mean … she really … oh, Shiala … I'm confused."

Shiala laughed, "Well that's a first. Who is this that you are thinking of melding with?"

Liara moved away and leaned against her desk, knocking a stack of books off. Both of them looked at the books scattered on the floor and Liara frowned. "I really need to straighten up."

"Later," Shiala said, pulling her away from the mess. "To meld is that one thing we do when there is no doubt and absolute desire for someone. A desire to embrace them ... to know them on a much deeper level ... feel them, please them exquisitely and when you are much older ... you can even use it in the process of mating if needed. It is the spiritual union that connects us to everything, a joining that brings you as one with the other. You see things in that person and she ... or he ... will see things in you that … well, it forever changes you. A piece of that person stays with you and a piece of you stays with them. I know I'm not saying this right, Little. The Matriarch would be better at explaining this."

Liara walked over to her bed and turned to her friend, "A piece of her?" her hand went to her throat. "And she would keep a piece of me?"

"Yes." Shiala moved closer, "Little, this is quite different than physical exploration. Physical explorations pleasure both but there is no real meaning behind it."

Liara thought of the times that she had been physically pleasing with others and she did not understand how other species put so much worth on it ... treating it as special as the melding. To her it was no more different then eating a delicious meal or sleeping in a soft bed. Enjoyable? Yes. Life changing? No. "No meaning."

Shiala smiled as she brushed Liara's cheek, "The physical union is … well ... pleasure. When you meld however ... it is you giving of yourself ... opening yourself up to another and risking the pain of rejection. Do you understand?"

Liara lowered her head, "I think so. Being with her physically is pleasing and I like the way that she touches me. But … I think that I should feel … want … Oh, I don't know how to say what I am thinking."

Shiala laughed at Liara's frustration. "Little, am I to assume that this is another asari? Or have you met someone while on one of your digs?"

"Someone else?" Liara questioned, realizing what Shiala was implying. "Oh by the Goddess, no! Anyone other than an asari? I don't find other species quite, well … attractive."

Shiala laughed, "Don't push away other species so soon. You might find someone interesting that isn't an asari. And attraction does go beyond the physical. If you find a strong smart mind in a hanar the union could be…" Shiala winked.

Liara shook her head, "No Shiala. The thought of being with another species," Shiala picked up the prothean jewelry and began trying to place it on the head dress again. "No. My mind is made up. No turians, krogans, salarians, drell-"

Shiala giggled, "Stubborn girl! What about that new species? The humans?"

Liara looked shocked, "Have you?"

Shiala laughed, "No. But I haven't met a human yet either. I've seen them on vids with their funny looking … what do they call that? Oh, yes. Hair. I wonder what that feels like. I hear that it is in other places as well."

"Other places?" Shiala looked down, "Shiala!"

"Mmmm, and their lips!" Shiala drifted. "I love kissing and they seem to have the most tempting shape of lips. Especially the ones with full lips. To place mine upon a human with wanton and lusty full lips … mmmmm."

"Shiala!"

Shiala laughed as she snapped the piece in place. "Little, my advice is to wait."

"You do think that I am too young!" Liara insisted.

Shiala took Liara by the chin, "Yes, Little … You are simply too young and the fact that you are questioning if you should or shouldn't tells me that … well, you are clearly not ready. Or do you disagree with my assessment?"

"How does it look?" Liara avoiding the question asked as she went to the mirror. It was seeing her own reflection that she realized that her lips were sucked in again. She slowly let her lips out and as she relaxed, the piece flew across the room breaking a little figurine of a dancing drell.

"Little, are you sure that you're not mistaking a weapon for jewelry?" Both Shiala and Liara started laughing as they saw the destroyed drell.

"I'm beginning to wonder." Liara went over and picked up the piece. "Sibila would have loved to have seen this."

Shiala laughed, "If Sibila was here, the piece probably would have hit her!" Both of them laughed even harder.

Liara looked at the piece closely, placed it on her desk and looked at the box, "Shiala, do you think the Matriarch would mind if I missed the party?"

"Liara," Shiala smiled, "The Matriarch loves having you at her social gatherings and you know that. It would not only disappoint her greatly if you weren't present tonight but it would also mean that I had failed in escorting you down."

"But I'm not very good at these things."

Shiala walked over to Liara and hugged her, "You are wonderful at these things and in this dress; you are absolutely the loveliest of lovelies tonight, Little."

Liara had been exceptionally tiny for an asari when she was born, which caused great concern in the T'Soni household but as time moved on her petite frame did not hold her back. This resulted in her being nicknamed _Little_ by the household. As she grew the household found her to be intelligent, curious, stubborn and accident prone … a dangerous combination. Once when she was just ten she had wondered how a park ride much like a see saw worked so she snuck across the street to the Serenite Park and started to tear the ride apart … as she removed a piece it came down on her pining her to the ground. She did not cry out but laid there hoping no one would notice as she tried to figure out how to get free. She had watched still as a mouse as she was passed by and once another asari sat down on her giggling ... it had hurt but she refused to scream out in pain ... as the mother of the other eight-year-old came closer Liara held her breath. She just knew that she was about to get in trouble. But the mother did not see her as she was too focused on her own daughter who was running away. When she was finally found hours later she was dehydrated and so ashamed that she would not talk or look at anyone. Benezia had watched as her daughter stayed in bed, hidden underneath the covers ... Benezia wanted to scold her daughter but she saw the shame on the little asari and so she would just sit on the bed next to her daughter. Quiet and waiting. It was days before Liara finally broke down and cried in her mother's arms.

Matriarch Aethyta had heard about the incident through mutual friends weeks later while she was on business in Armali and it had made her laugh, "Ah, what do you want? That kid is smart and curious … just like Benezia. She is going to stir up the dust now and again." But as Aethyta continued to think on the event she was brought back to the days that she was sharing her bed with Benezia. Aethyta was born and raised on Nevos where her parents had started their own bar on the boardwalk in Astella. With a krogan father she was greatly influenced by his gruff nature and salty tongue but her life was forever changed when her parents killed each other. She was quick to tell that story, to throw it aside ... but it tarnished her views on family ... family life. Throughout her maiden years she had danced and had numerous affairs until she met a hanar named Etera and settled down in Whitecap, Belan. For the next four decades she was content with her bondmate and daughter, Arena. Her daughter was her light and when she sent her off to Serrice, Thessia to train at the elite biotic training school Elibio Academy she had told her, "Just remember, Arena … no one fucks with a T'Louck!" With those words her daughter was set into the world and while she had minimal communication with her, Aethyta knew that her daughter was tough. She had made sure of that and no one … not a krogan, not an asari, not a hanar … not anyone would get one over on her daughter. The last message that she had received from Arena was to tell her that she had just had a daughter. That had been over a century ago.

After Etera had passed away, Aethyta moved on … from bartender to stripper to mercenary to miner to bartender and by 1800 she was working on the T'Soni plantation on Lusia. She had loved the work, loved the trees that brought relief to the plants and the feel of soil under her nails. One of her favorite times was early morning and she would sit under one of those trees and sketch ... her sketches tended to be dark, violent and cutting but here ... the trees made her hand lighter. It was while she was sketching one morning near the main house that her eyes fell upon the most beautiful vision standing on the porch. That was when she met Benezia T'Soni and lost her heart. She had done everything to conquer the Corallium asari over the next few months and when she finally took her in one of the drying houses she was quickly shown who was in control ... and it wasn't her. She had never had someone else overpower her and make her cry out until that day. As their relationship grew stronger she had traveled to Armali where she finally saw just how grand and expansive the T'Soni estate was. Hell, she was out of her league but the rack … no, she wasn't going anywhere. For over two centuries she was with Benezia but it was not easy … for either. Aethyta hated how others were drawn to her Nezzy and hated sharing her with them. Even pre-Matriarch stage Benezia had acolytes and all her classes and lectures at the Armali University were packed. Aethyta's father had always been possessive of her mother and she saw that as showing absolute desire so she also was possessive and jealous ... nature or nurture it didn't matter. She was never one to get too reflective ... she just was. This was not typical asari behavior but _you get raised by a krogan and see how you turn out_, she would tell others that would make that observation. There were many arguments and after she talked Nezzy into becoming her bondmate she thought that it would get better ... That her Nezzy would not need the acolytes, the attention, and the focus outside of her. But that did not happen and the fights continued … well, fights weren't really correct. Aethyta would yell, there were physical altercations with others that she saw as competition and Benezia would get colder and colder. If only Benezia would yell back … fight a little. But she could become a wall. This drove her crazy … so she would go away on trips to clear her head. After she had worked a few seasons in Luisa she returned to hear that her Nezzy was talking about having a baby. A baby? Aethyta felt herself getting angry ... waiting for Benezia to pick some non-asari but no … Nezzy wanted her child to be from another asari. Her.

"So you want a quarter krogan?" Aethyta kissed Benezia on the neck.

"What?" Sometimes Benezia did not understand her. Aethyta came from a place that was just as foreign to Benezia as the privileged society was to Aethyta.

"Well, I'm half krogan so …"

Benezia shook her head, "You know that it does not work that way."

"The hell it does," Aethyta disagreed with the current views on mating. "You have to admit that my mouth is a krogans!"

Benezia had laughed, "Yes … and so is your temper and possessiveness."

"Then you agree?" Aethyta grabbed a breast as she pushed Benezia against the wall.

Benezia knowing that it was a waste of time to argue with her bondmate, removed her hand, placed it on her backside as she kissed her deep. That is what Aethyta understood and how Benezia kept the upper hand.

They had went to the seaside resort of Messonia where Benezia had a beautiful summer home that butted up to the Crysta sea and while Aethyta wanted to just tear off Nezzy's clothes and taste her as they melded for a daughter … Benezia wanted to perform the sitruuna mating ritual. The set was placed outside in her courtyard facing the sea, sitruuna, candles, incense, pillows, sweets … Aethyta had never learned the ritual and so Nezzy had to show her. She cracked her cup in her first attempt but after Benezia replaced it she limped through the remainder and as Benezia calmed her lover, watched serenely as she made missteps, kissed her, touched her, invited her onto her pillow … they made her daughter beneath the stars of Thessia and to the sound of the Crysta Sea. But shortly after that night while still on holiday Aethyta had another jealous moment, head butted an asari that she thought was trying to pick up Benezia and … and the next morning when she awoke she was alone. She had wanted to try and beg for forgiveness but her pride stood in the way. Nezzy would have to come to her this time! She was always apologizing ... not this time! Nezzy was sure to beg her now that she was having a kid. Right? After all, if only Nezzy would not encourage such behavior from others. Aethyta knew that Benezia was not encouraging it … she was just simply inspiring it. As days turned to weeks, weeks into months, months into years … it became impossible to return to Armali … instead she returned to Nevos.

Now after hearing about Nezzy's daughter in the park ... She finally got the nerve to reach out and called her. She could hear the ice in her ex-bondmate's voice but as they started to talk about Liara the ice began to thaw. When Benezia shared her concerns of her daughter's recent misadventures and discussed Little's stubbornness she heard Aethyte laugh … "You're treating her like a baby bird, Nezzy, but she's going to raise one hell of a storm with those little wings." This had made Benezia laugh as she looked over at her daughter who was wrapping herself in a sheet and running through the house. "Little Wing," Benezia smiled.

Shiala saw Liara pouting as she pulled away from her, "Oh, what are we going to do with you?"

Liara kissed her friend on the cheek, then sat down on the side of her bed, frowning. "Please Shiala, tell mother that I am … I am …"

"Trapped in a box?" Shiala laughed.

"You heard?" Liara looked embarrassed.

Shiala continued to laugh as she nodded and then pulled Liara up from the bed. "Come on baby!"


	7. Poker & Cigar Night

"I'm not a baby!" Shepard said to her father.

"I guess you're not," Pierce laughed. "Okay, fine. You can go riding horses with B as soon as we are no longer grounded. Now get back to your job!"

Hannah was at church teaching the Thursday night Bible class while her daughter was mixing drinks and serving beer for her husband and his three closest friends. Pierce held a weekly "Poker & Cigar Night" in the Shepard garage and his daughter served as bartender until a half hour before the pastor's time to come home. Pierce knew that if his wife found out it would mean the doghouse but he loved seeing his kid grin ear to ear as she hung out with his gang. Or the "unrepentant four", as Hannah called them. The four would play poker, smoke cigars, drink and laugh until the wee hours. The friends were Rowan O'Hara the owner of the O'Hara Pub, Stu Aasen the local butcher at Rurik's Grocer and Pierce's former lover and now best friend, Birgit Hallestrøm, who had just been promoted as the Sheriff over Somerset County, while also playing drums in the 'Live Sprockets'.

Rowan downed a shot of whiskey, "How did you get the pastor to approve our night? I thought that you were grounded?"

"On a technicality, really my dear friend," Pierce leaned his chair back and exhaled a cloud of smoke. "We are grounded at the house, but nothing says that we can't have friends over." Pierce smiled.

"Uh-uh." Stu shook his head, "The truth old man."

Shepard dropped his chair down, "I have to attend church the next month of Sundays and play the guitar."

The unrepentant three laughed at him as Shepard put more pretzels in a dish as she moved her little butt around to _X Offender_ by Blondie.

"Speaking of guitar, now that Eli is grown up, maybe she can play in our band?" Birgit winked as she lit her cigar.

"Could I?" Shepard asked as she went over to the bar and began making her father's martini.

Pierce frowned at Birgit and looked at his daughter, "Eli, your mother would never let you play in my band … so get that thought out of your head."

"But dad, I'm almost grown up now."

As everyone laughed at that comment, Shepard frowned and handed her father his drink. "Eli, you are far from grown up, thank god! You still have many years left of school, exams, summer vacations, spankings …"

"Daddy!" Shepard pouted as she placed her hand over his mouth.

Birgit stopped laughing, took a drink of Brännvin and pulled Shepard to her, "Men, what do they know. We women age faster … and I bet none of them ever took on a krogan battlemaster!"

"Is that what he was?" Pierce asked as he patted his daughter on the behind, "My kid was crawling all over a krogan battlemaster? What was he doing here?"

"He was here to pick up a piece of shit," Birgit stopped to take another drink of Brännvin, "The old guy is a bounty hunter and I was hoping to meet him at the airport quick like so there were no troubles. Krogans aren't known for having patience with others and I've heard that this one has even killed a thresher maw." Shepard handed a bowl of pretzels to Stu and smiled at him as she slid one of his chips in her pocket.

"Thresher maw?" Rowan gasped.

"Crazy shit! That's how frickin' nuts and battle hungry those things are. Anyone willing to fight a thresher maw has got to be pure insane!" Stu added.

Birgit agreed as she softly punched Shepard. "But I got delayed in this crazy traffic. I swear it's starting to feel like I never left Earth with all these new arrivals."

"Isn't that the truth!" Rowan seconded. "But since it means my bar is getting more crowded everday ..." he raised his glass, "well, I'll drink to crowded!"

"Traitor!" Pierce bit down on his cigar. "Is that krogan still here?"

"Nej," she shook her head. "Once I handed off the prisoner to him he caught the next flight out."

"You were nice to Beast, right?" Shepard asked as she poured a beer for Rowan.

"Beast?" Birgit asked.

"That's what she called him … Beast." Pierce shook his head and began shuffling the cards.

"To his face?" Rowan asked as Stu whistled.

"You sure you're not a boy?" Stu laughed.

"Boy?" Birgit scoffed. "Hell, it takes ovaries not balls to be a real bad ass! By the time I was sixteen, I had been on my own for over two years. I was living on the streets, fighting every day, or fuckin' to stay alive."

"Fuckin'?" Stu prodded.

"Hell, once when I was 19, I was with this bartender in Västerås, oh what was his name? Kettil. That bastard had a 13 inch cock and thick as your fist. Couldn't walk for a week after our first time. And then in Stockholm there was this poet Saskia, she was-"

"Okay," Pierce cut in, "Birgit are you trying to get our weekly poker cancelled?" Birgit made the zipper gesture over her lips as she looked over at Shepard who had missed the whole exchange. She had her head in the garage fridge clanking bottles around trying to find a bottle of Guinness.

"What did Saskia look like?" Stu asked as he picked up his cards. "And what did you two do?"

Pierce threw chips at Stu who laughed as he tried to dodge them.

As Shepard placed the cold Guinness next to Stu, "Aunt B, did daddy tell you about the pretty women with the tall shoes at the port?"

Birgit looked at Pierce who mouthed whores. "Oh, the gals down at the mine … shit, between the protests scheduled this weekend and them trying to get a permit to bring asari out here. It's all fucked up."

"Asari?" Stu smiled.

"Put your pecker back in its place," Birgit flicked her cigar at him. "That ain't gonna happen and if I hear that any one of you idiots are over there … especially you Pierce ... No one cheats on my woman. Shit! If I can't have her, you best believe that I'll shoot your dick off if it strays!"

Pierce laughed nervously as he shot a look at his kid, who was now running the blender. "Birgit! The kid!"

"Just remember my words. I may be your best friend, but you know I'm madly in love with your wife! And no one is going to hurt her or our kid. Not even you!" Pierce laughed as they clinked glasses and took a shot together.

As the adults continued their game, Shepard looked at Birgit who was making the grown men blush, laugh and even made Stu spit his beer everywhere. Birgit was the best marksman in the town and had taken young Shepard to the shooting range on occasion to let her watch. She had just recently started letting Shepard fire the sniper rifle and Shepard not only loved it but she had the gift. "Daddy, that scope sure does bring things close!" Shepard had told her dad when she got home after that first time. Shepard looked up to Birgit and wished that she was older just so she could hang out with her at the pub and even go chase chicks with her. She didn't really understand why Aunt B was chasing chicks ... you couldn't eat them. They were too little ... she would have to ask her mom later why Aunt B chases chicks. Shepard's mind then started thinking about what B had previously said and after using her fingers to calculate ... she asked, "Aunt B, you were on your own at 14?" Birgit nodded yes as she dropped a few chips on the table. Shepard seemed to think hard on this, "But Aunt B, where was your parents?"

Birgit put her cards down, pulled Shepard close to her and softly said, "Butterfly, I wish that I had your parents. They love you so much and would never let anyone hurt you. That is a gift! But not all of us had that gift growing up. My parents were not nice people ... so I ran away."

"But weren't you scared?" Shepard asked, not believing that anyone would leave their parents.

"Very. But I was more afraid to stay." Birgit answered. Shepard started to tear up thinking of her aunt alone as a little girl and it touched Birgit. She hugged Shepard to her and slowly wiped away the tears, "Don't cry, butterfly … I have you to take care of me now. You, your dad, these two fools -"

"Hey, you be nice woman!" Rowan cut her off. "Or you will lose a fool!" Stu laughed and took a drink of the Guinness … "Why do you drink that crappy beer?"

"What?" Stu laughed, "And you an Irishman! This is an Irish beer!"

"No! This is an Irish beer!" he responded as he grabbed a Jameson whiskey bottle.

"I thought that was Irish wine?" Stu retorted.

"Butterfly," Birgit laughed, "Why don't you play us something while I take these bastards money?"

Shepard smiled, ran into the living room where her dad's guitar was cradled and returned with it as her father shut off the music. "What do you wanna hear?"

"Oh," Stu responded before anyone else "how about 'The Skies of Shanxi' to start?" Shepard spent the next hour playing music on the guitar as the adults gambled, drank, smoked and bullshit.

As Shepard started playing a song that she was just learning for her mom ... _Il Me Dit Que Je Suis Belle_, Hannah quietly walked up the driveway and stopped in the shadows. Hannah would have loved to just walk in, sit down and listen to her daughter, but she knew that her presence would make the party uncomfortable. So she stood back in the shadows and smiled at her little girl singing in her native tongue ... "You are beautiful, my baby," she whispered.

Everyone saw Hannah Shepard as some kind of saint, a woman who had never said a swear word, ever been improper or done anything lewd … but she had secrets. The secrets started with her birth to a whore, Ophelie Levasseur, in Paris and rolled into even darker secrets. Her mother, Ophelie was an angry, hate-filled and very violent woman who loved only money, drugs, alcohol and her man, Brice Reinard. He came from the same gutter of selfishness and they seem to take great pleasure in abusing, Marguex. By the time Marguex, as Hannah was called then, was ten she was being prostituted out. Throughout the years the young girl was beaten, used, torn down and despite the multiple times she ran away, Ophelie always found her, lied to her to get her back and then the cycle would start over. Her life would have been a bad romance novel, but there was no white knight that saved her. She lived through it all without anyone breaking down the door or rescuing her at the last minute. She just lived through it.

As her daughter finished playing, Hannah smiled and then slipped into the house and as the kitchen light came on, Pierce put down his cigar and excused himself. He instructed Shepard to say her goodnights and then go in the house as he opened the back screen door to the kitchen.

Hannah was putting on a kettle for her tea as he walked in. She smiled and started slicing a lemon, "Are you having a nice time?" Pierce smiled and went to kiss her. She smelled the smoke and alcohol on him and gently pushed him away, "Pierce, go play with your friends. All I want is a nice cup of tea and quiet to work on my sermon for Sunday."

"Eli should be in shortly," Pierce said a little dejected. Hannah always seemed to push him away when he had been smoking or drinking, "She's a preacher," Birgit would remind him, "She don't want you when you smell like sin. But hell, if she were my woman I would wax off all of my hair if it meant she would make love to me." Pierce figured that his friend was right, well about the sin not the waxing. The truth was much darker; it reminded her of the countless men that would pay for her when she was young. Filthy sheets, stale smoke, alcohol, unwashed bodies, bad breath, unshaven faces, just a few things that brought back bad memories. If Hannah could have had it her way, she would never have sex again, but she cared about her husband. He was always gentle and kind when they were together. And. She loved him.

Before him, Hannah in her new life had seen many admirers but her early years made her shy away from sexual situations. She was very distrustful of men, having seen the darker side of them and she didn't think that she could handle another man on top of her, inside of her. When Pierce showed up out of nowhere with his guitar she was amused by his smile and impressed by his musical ability. But she also knew that he was thinking of her in a way that made her uncomfortable. As the days went on, he would show up at public places with his smile and easy charm. She slowly began to open up to him and when he was upfront about his atheism; she couldn't help but respect his honesty. She needed a faith. He didn't.

Pierce didn't try and kiss her until they were on their 3rd date and when she informed him that she would not have sex until after she was married, she hoped he would run. He stayed. She had expected at some point he would try. That she would have to fight him off. But as the months went by, Pierce was a perfect gentleman, honoring her wishes and keeping his word.

On their honeymoon night in a beautiful bed & breakfast called The Gastonian in Savannah, he tried being a Don Juan in the bed but he had waited so long that when he finally had her, saw her stripped and naked ... touched her in places previously off-limits, felt her touch him back ... tasted her … Premature ejaculation was the word. He was embarrassed, while she was relieved.

Sometimes Marguex and the past would peek out and her dark secrets would bring pain, guilt, remorse … memories that sliced at Hannah. It would leave her emotionally cold from those around her momentarily as she tried to disconnect again from the past. She would look at her daughter and feel unworthy to touch her ... as if her old sins were a disease that would kill her child. Shepard not knowing would see her mother looking out the window and as she went over to give her a hug would be told to go away. She would push her husband away during those hours as well, leaving both confused, but she couldn't tell either what the darkness was. She couldn't tell anyone about her past. Pierce didn't push back … it was enough for him to know that she loved him, married him and gave him his daughter and Shepard just saw it as her mother's _moody day_.

"Hi Mom!" Shepard yelled as she raced through the kitchen to the living room holding the guitar over her head as she went.

"Elizabeth Whisper Shepard!" Hannah called after her, "No running in the house!"

Pierce was still looking dejected at his wife, bottom lip unconsciously pouting as he collected the trash.

"Sorry Mom!" Shepard responded as she stuck her head in the room. Hannah couldn't help but laugh at her daughter who was also sticking out her bottom lip but in a playful pout.

"Dear Lord, I have to deal with two pouting Shepards!" Hannah noted as she looked at her husband and daughter. Pierce looked up, realized his pout and looked embarrassed. He then stepped out the back door with the trash to continue his poker party after stopping at the trash can. Shepard then grinned and danced into the kitchen towards her mother. "You are a little mess, missy." Hannah laughed as she pulled her daughter to her in a warm hug. "You must be feeling better."

Shepard nodded her head as she pulled away from Hannah and picked up a slice of lemon off the counter. As she held it in her hand she looked up with a frown, "Momma, did you know that Aunt B was on her own when she was only 14 years old?" Hannah looked at her daughter, nodded as the kettle began to whistle. Hannah removed it from the flame and began making her cup of tea as Shepard continued, "How could someone be on their own without family or friends?"

Hannah thought back to her life at 14, pushed it away quickly and then looked down at her daughter, "Baby that is something that you won't ever have to worry about. I promise. Your daddy and I will always be here." Hannah tilted her daughter's face up, lemon peel over teeth in her mouth, laughed, bent and kissed her nose, "I'm not going anywhere and neither are you!" Then Hannah removed the peel from her daughter's mouth, kissed her on the lips, turned her around and as she gave her a swat on the behind, instructed her to "go take your bath and get ready for bed."

"Always, 'go take your bath' with you," Shepard grumbled.

"Elizabeth," Hannah scolded. "Don't act smart with me."

"No, ma'am." Shepard stood in between the kitchen and living room, "Did daddy tell you that I made a new friend today?"

"I heard," Hannah said. "A krogan?"

"Yes, ma'am … A krogan battlewaxer! I call him Beast though!" Shepard started twisting her shirt and moving closer to her mother, "He was so awesome looking mommy! And he had these cool looking things on his wrists. I hope that he comes back one day to visit, cause I invited him to dinner. I think that you would like him. He's a little grumpy, but I can tell he's really good. If he comes back I'll even teach him to swim!"

"Swim, huh?" Hannah laughed at the thought of her daughter teaching a krogan to swim, "Well, if you invited him to dinner … I'll have to look up what krogans eat." Hannah smiled and turned around to place lemon peels in the trash compactor.

As she heard her daughter singing, "His name was Beast, came from the East, his eyes were red, his enemies dead!" she laughed and remembered her daughter as a newborn, lying defenseless in her arms. Hannah had cried; something that her husband had never seen her do until the birth of their daughter. She vowed that no one would ever hurt her daughter, no one. She then said a silent prayer that God would keep watch over her child and that he would send someone into her life that would love her, protect her and care for her just as much as her parents. When she confided her prayer to Pierce later he laughed. "Honey, she has years before she is even old enough to date and already you have her married?"

After today, she couldn't help but laugh to herself … _If my daughter is already making friends with a krogan, I'm afraid to see who she brings home to marry._ As Hannah continued to laugh while she prepared to work on her sermon, her daughter was lost in bubbles as her song continued, "Beast my friend, till the end, by my side, till I die!" As Shepard jerked with her tune and played with the soap, it slipped from her hands and on to the floor. "Momma! I lost the soap!"

Hannah came into the bathroom and located the soap behind the door. As she rinsed it off in the sink she looked at her daughter, "Do you want me to wash your back?"

"Yes, please" Shepard was playing with her Aqua Girl doll, making her dive in and out of the bubbles. Hannah asked Shepard if she wanted music as well and Shepard gave out a loud YES! Hannah laughed, turned music on causing Shepard to start dancing on her butt in the tub as Little Richard was bopping out a tune. Hannah gave a short scream as water and bubbles splashed everywhere, putting out her hands to protect herself from the water. She then put her hand on top of Shepard's head to hold her still as she reached over and changed the radio to the local station that played classical.

"Settle down, now" Hannah laughed. "Your back will stay dirty if you don't stop splashing!"

Shepard giggled as she calmed down, squinted at her mom then kissed her on the nose.

Hannah laughed, "What was that?"

"I don't know," Shepard shrugged as she closed one eye, "Just love ya mommy."

And with that Shepard went back to her Aqua Girl while Hannah smiled at her odd daughter and began washing her back.

The sound of Chopin began to creep through the house while the sound of laughter spilled on top of it as the unrepentant four continued their night of revelry out in the garage.


	8. The Politics of Dancing

The sound of the strings, percussion and wind instruments filled the house downstairs as the Armali orchestra played in the ballroom. The piece titled "EtZev", was composed by the much beloved asari composer Akdhat around 200 CE. It was written after her asari bondmate had died during a battle in the rachni wars. The 22-minute piece reflected the Akdhat's next 100 years that saw her in deep sorrow over the lost lover. The strings captured her heartache, the percussions her bitterness and the wind her loneliness. This was Liara's favorite composer and her favorite piece since she was a few decades old ... the sweet bitternesss of it touched her and even though she did not understand the heartbreak she sensed a small portion of it. From the first time that she heard it she felt her eyes slightly mist. She stopped Shiala at the top of the stairs just to listen to the bitterness section before they became part of the crowd below.

As Liara and Shiala stood at the top of the stairs and listened to the music, they looked out over guests mingling in the main greeting hall. The sight below was something that only asari had ever witnessed. With no other species to upset the natural flow of their kind, the room resembled ice skaters floating around each other, touching, softly speaking, and flowing in time to their own unique rhythm that Akdhat music so delicately and sensuously captured. It was widely known that the asari were open in their sensuality but what that meant was often perverted by outside species. Without fear of misunderstandings or judgments, the asari were able to move and dress as they preferred when among their own kind. Some guests had on light flowing attire while others were simply wearing a piece of jewelry. Liara's dress was one of the less revealing while Shiala's had a sunflower yellow tunic top that cut off 6" from her knees and was open at the front, revealing a breast now and then as she moved.

Liara had always covered her breasts at the asari social events, using the covering as some kind of armor. She had on more than one occasion heard people discussing "purebloods" at gatherings and having even the thinnest of cloth around her breasts made her somehow feel protected. She knew that it would sound foolish to others but there it was … her reason for covering up. Of course, if she had worn this same outfit in a human social event she would have been noticed, since she wore no underclothes leaving her form visible below the silk.

As the asari moved gracefully around each other, soft touches and mutual glances were shared which carried more weight than words. These movements were mothers encouraging daughters, friends complimenting friends, lovers promising pleasures to come. There was so much being communicated in the smallest of movements. Despite Liara's protestations, she was both gifted and admired in these social gatherings. As she left the stairs and joined the gathering she moved from guest to guest with such grace that her form received just a slight more brushes of skin, caresses of the cheek and whispers of praise. If you were the one she was currently talking with, she would stand close, a hand placed just lightly as she touched your arm, blue eyes shining as they looked deep into yours, her head tilted ever so as she gave you her absolute attention. If what you said was touching, she would respond by brushing your cheek with hers or if it was humorous she would squeeze your arm and smile.

On the main terrace overlooking the city lights of Armali below the Matriarch was deep in conversation with three respected Matriarchs from neighboring cities as well as the Councilor Tevos and her mate Matriarch Lidanya.

Matriarch Benezia looked concerned, "And why did the batarians close their embassy and sever all ties to the council?"

Councilor Tevos had just taken a bite of the deleazo offered to her from the tray, "The batarians are furious about the humans settling in the Skyllian Verge. They demanded that the area be declared a batarian interest and the humans removed."

Matriarch Aleta shook her head, "Nothing good can come from this."

Councilor Tevos looked at Benezia, "We informed the human Ambassador of the potential backlash that they may encounter."

"Nothing more?" Benezia arched an eyebrow.

Councilor Tevos cleared her throat, "We did suggest that the humans notify their colonists to be vigil and that their own military take precaution. But the council is to meet when I return to discuss what our next step should be."

Benezia frowned as her finger circled the rim of her glass, "Without fully understanding the humans or their potential to the community … We cannot interfere at this time. At least … not this early in the conflict, it would require us to show approval where questions are still unanswered. "

Aleta agreed, "Very imprudent to side with the humans without really knowing what and who they are." The two remaining Matriarchs saw the wisdom in being patient, monitoring the situation and waiting to see the true nature of the humans. The Councilor looked at her mate who also nodded a yes and she sighed, "Then we will wait."

The five Matriarchs gathered on the terrace had all lived at least 700 years each and, as such, each had witnessed countless galactic wars and political shifts giving them insight into where this current event may lead. They understood how history had a way of repeating because they had lived through it. It was not something taught to them from a book or in a classroom, but through their own lives, their own personal experiences. They also had seen how new species when first encountered could appear to be one thing, only to turn and be the exact opposite. What you see was not always what you got.

Benezia turned to look out on the city lights, "Lives will be lost."

Matriarch Celandine noted in her gravel voice, "But not our daughters."

Just then Liara appeared on the terrace smiling as she pressed towards them. Smile here, a touch there, delicate laugh, swaying hips. "Benezia, your daughter is becoming quite the wisp."

Benezia turned to Tevos and smiled, "Yes. She is."

"How many lives?" Matriarch Nephele asked.

"Does it matter? They won't be our daughters." Celandine reiterated.

Liara had seen the anger below her mother's calm exterior as she kissed Tevos, gently brushed by Lidanya and then caressed her mother's face. Benezia smiled at her daughter, put her arm around her and then icily responded to Celandine, "Innocent lives of all species matter Cela."

Celandine withered under Benezia's cold stare and Tevos softened the moment, "We are hopeful that the humans understand the dangers and protect their innocent."

"What are the humans like?" Aleta asked.

Tevos motioned for another glass of thopevo, "They are very aggressive and have a sense of entitlement that I have never seen before. But they are also very resourceful and creative."

"They are bullies and appear to think only of themselves." Lidanya added.

"Thank the Goddess that they are weak then," Celandine responded. "Batarians, krogans … and now humans. Can't we find more species more docile like the elcor?"

"Or quiet like the keepers." Lidanya sighed.

Aleta shook her head, "Can't we protect the young? Or do humans start out in infancy?"

Tevos looked at her glass of sea green liquid, "Yes, they have infants that develop as we do and they are at risk …"

Liara touched her mother's arm and Benezia placed her hand over her daughter's and shook her head just slightly, _do not interrupt, daughter_. _Know your place_. Liara put her head down as the Matriarchs and Councilor continued to discuss the potential loss. Liara was concerned not about the human lives, but that her mother seemed stress. Liara did not have any attachments to the humans. She had never even seen a human child, and only one human. She was trying to get information on the relic Amoonuiza and a picture of someone named Moon Unit Zappa popped up on her screen. _Humans have odd names_; she had thought at the time and then wondered what the gender of this human was. But she was in a rush and had moved on to her studies, Moon Unit Zappa forgotten. She did not wish them harm, but unlike her mother she felt no connection. That type of connection or empathy was developed through years or personal investment and Liara was still a child with no human contact.

Benezia not wanting others in the party to hear what they were discussing, suggested that they continue it on her private terrace. As they turned to leave she instructed her daughter to play hostess and mingle. Liara watched them leave the terrace and as she turned around her breath caught and she found herself blushing, followed by panic. Professor T'Lemk was standing just 10 feet away from her wearing nothing but a gold belly chain and sandals. The professor was smiling at her and slowly winding her way over to her. Liara quickly looked to see if her mother was gone and then searched out Shiala, who was herself in a deep conversation with another acolyte, Alestia.

Liara made her way over to the two and grabbed Shiala by the tunic, "Good evening Alestia," she quickly acknowledged, clumsy brush to the waist, before pushing Shiala into her mother's reading room off the great hallway.

"Hey! What?" As Shiala found herself standing inside the room, both of her breasts out of her shirt, Liara quickly shut both doors. "Great, this look will not work." She readjusted the tunic to only reveal one breast and smiled, "That's better." She then looked at Liara who was now peeking out one of the room's double doors, "Uh, hello? Is there a reason that you dragged me into the reading room?" Liara was so focused on locating Nicia that she didn't hear her. Shiala frowned, pulled Liara from the door and shut it closed. "What's going on, Little?"

"Nothing." Liara responded as they moved to the reading table.

"Nothing? You greet Alestia with less grace than a volus," Shiala mimicked Liara's clumsy greeting, causing Liara to giggle "then you all but strip me as you force me into the Matriarch's private reading room. Something is going on!"

Liara put a hand on Shiala's waist and whispered, "You remember the conversation that we had in my room?"

"The conversation about whether or not you should meld with your secret lover?" Liara nodded and Shiala began to grin, "Where?" She asked as she ran to the door. Liara squealed as she tried stopping Shiala, but it was too late. Shiala had her head peeking out and simultaneously pushing Liara away and waving her to come. "Who? Who?"

"Am I coming or going?" Liara asked as she saw the confusing hand signs.

Shiala looked back in, "Who is she?"

Liara peered out and saw the professor just a few feet from them. She ducked back in and as she leaned against the other door whispered, "Professor T'Lemk."

The grin on Shiala's face slowly fell as she stood up, closed the door and looked at Liara, "Please tell me that I misheard you."

Liara looked at her and half-smiled, "No?"

Shiala leaned her back against the other door, "This is not good! The Matriarch will … Oh, Goddess! What are you thinking?"

Liara stood up, "What is wrong with her?"

Shiala looked at the young asari, shook her head and stood up herself. She opened the door and made a sweeping motion towards the exit, "Why nothing. Please go and introduce me to your new erotas."

Liara squealed again and hid behind a chair next to the room's terrace, "Shut it! Shut it!" She whispered as she waved her hand.

Shiala looked out the door, saw the professor talking to Alestia and then the acolyte pointed in her direction. "Oh, no!" Shiala bit her lip and shut the door.

"Oh, no what?" Liara panicked as Shiala locked the doors and backed up. "Oh, no what, Shiala?"

The doors rattled, both girls screamed and then knocking followed. Shiala mouthed, _what do we do?_ Liara looked around and then yanked down drapery that her mother had just had installed. Shiala's eyes went wide as she imagined what the Matriarch was going to do when she saw her drapes ripped down. She shook her head and then said, "Who is it?"

As Liara ran out onto the room's private terrace and began trying to throw the drapery up to the next terrace, Shiala rolled her eyes. The drapery was folding over Liara and the weight, plus the panic resulted in Liara lying on the ground with the drapery over her.

While the professor announced herself and tried to open the door again, Shiala ran out to the terrace. "I love the new look! A little overdressed but it looks good on you." Liara's right eye was visible as she looked up at Shiala.

Shiala over her shoulder yelled, "Who is there?" as she helped Liara get free from the heavy material. She walked over to where the drapery had hung, the rod now tilted to the ground and shook her head, while Liara continued to run around the terrace trying to find something that would help her climb up to the terrace above them.

"Professor T'Lemk. Can I come in?"

Liara noticed the bookshelf that wasn't attached to the wall and began frantically pulling the books out and upon hearing the door rattle again started dragging the half empty bookcase outside on the terrace. While books abandoned ship along the way, Shiala whispered, "Why don't you just say hello?"

Liara's eyes got wide as she pushed the almost empty bookcase over against the outside wall. "What? And have mother see me with her? Oh, by the Goddess! She would … No, no, no!"

As Liara placed a foot on a shelf, the door rattled again, causing Shiala to shout, "One minute please!" She then grabbed Liara by the arm, "So let me get this straight. You would rather the Matriarch see her reading room destroyed than you being social with the Professor T'Lemk?"

Liara shook her head, "Mother would know the instant that she saw us together. I'll just say that … that …" Both girls looked over at the torn drapery, hanging rod, scattered books. "I'll think of something."

Across the way on another terrace, Matriarch Aleta walked over to Benezia. "What are your daughter and acolyte doing?"

Benezia and the others turned to see Liara start climbing the bookshelf as Shiala could be seen running around below. As Liara got halfway the bookshelf started to slide. "Wait! Wait!" Liara stopped her climb as the bookshelf settled. She could hear Shiala moving about as the Professor was getting more assertive, "Can someone open this door?"

As Liara slowly started to climb again she thought, _Thank the Goddess that mother can't see me._

Benezia grabbed a glass of thopevo from a tray and as she sipped it she watched her daughter. As Liara made it closer to the top, the shelf began to slide again and her unknown audience drew closer to the terrace rail to get a better look as Matriarchs Aleta and Nephele gasped in unison as the shelf came sliding over. Liara had kicked herself up and grabbed the rail at the same time, causing Aleta and Nephele to comment on her quick save. With Liara's feet swinging as she struggled to hang on, Tevos leaned over and whispered to Benezia, "Why doesn't she just use her biotics?"

Benezia put her hand to her forehead, "That would be too easy."

Shiala not seeing Liara assumed that she had made it and unlocked the door. The professor walked in and looked around. She eyed the mess as she asked, "Is Dr. T'Soni in here?"

"T'Soni?" Shiala tried leaning against a reading table, but missed and crashed into another bookshelf. "Why, no. It's just me." She half shrieked as she steadied herself with her feet splayed out in front of her.

Liara heard the professor and froze. She heard the professor say that the acolyte Alestia had informed her that Liara was in the reading room, _when I get out of this … this will be the last time that Alestia tells someone where to find a T'Soni! She should know not to give dire- Oh! _Liara felt her hands slipping and began to struggle.

Benezia saw that Shiala was now talking to someone so she moved farther right to see inside the room. Her eyes moved past the destruction and saw Professor Nicia T'Lemk. Benezia's eyes turned into slits as she motioned to her private companion, Kyriake Alexakis, "Bring me Shiala at once."

Liara continued struggling as she tried to get her legs up and onto the terrace rail. _Just one more try!_ Liara groaned as she swung herself up, catching the rail with one foot and as her free foot kicked about, she slowly made it over. As she lay panting on the upper terrace floor she was unaware that across the way, her cheerleaders, Aleta and Nephele, clapped.


	9. Bacchus & the Stone

Hannah could hear the clapping and shouts of "Drink! Drink! Drink!" coming from the garage, as she worked on her Sunday sermon. At one point she heard Stu yell, followed by a crash and the other three howl with laughter. Hannah sighed and then took a sip of her tea as Stu swore up a storm and Birgit told him to "shut the fuck up! So you're bleeding, fuckwit! You want the pastor to hear your fuckin' mouth? Shit!" Hannah couldn't help but get tickled. As she adjusted her glasses, Shepard's bed started creaking and Hannah warned, "Elizabeth! Stop jumping on your bed and re-tuck in!"

The bed stopped creaking … "Sorry momma!" Hannah listened closer and heard her daughter talking to herself, "never get to do what I want. 'Take a bath Elizabeth', 'no jumping Elizabeth', 'brush your teeth Elizabeth'. Hello Beasley … Firefly stop hiding behind the ship … Tuchanka you hungry? … Boy, you guys are lucky! You can do whatever you want!"

Hannah shook her head at her daughter's impersonation of her and gave another warning for her to get back in bed, "You can talk to your fish in the morning! And don't feed Tuchanka!"

The bed creaked as Shepard got in and asked her Aqua Doll, "Why can she tell what I'm doing when daddy can't?"

_Because I'm your mother_, Hannah thought with a smile and went back to her typing.

* * *

Birgit realized that she was a little tight from the night's drinking but the pastor was the last religious figure in the community that she needed to talk to. Hell, she needed a few just to get the courage to speak to the pastor on the subject of whores. _Whores!_ Birgit thought to herself. _The first time I talk to the pastor as Sheriff and I'm talking about whores. God must have a perverse sense of humor … or he's showing me that I'm going to hell!_ The community was holding a protest against the Mindoir Nokeic Mining Company bringing a whorehouse to Mindoir. The Knocking Shop was placed next to the mining companies housing for the single men. The company was trying to ensure that the pack of rough men that they were shipping to Mindoir had a release away from the farming colonists. They were nervous that these men left on a planet without this type of service might do something that left shit on their face. Birgit understood this and she, like the company, also did not want shit on her face so she wanted to make sure that it was a peaceful protest … on both sides.

She also knew that there were a couple individuals that would try to turn the protest into a political or media event and Birgit was letting everyone know that her and her police force had a zero tolerance for anything other than a PEACEFUL protest. Birgit had been stern in all of her meetings, taking no shit and just laying down the law, but this was the Pastor. This was the very woman that she had fallen in love with under the Spanish sky … the woman who had seduced her simply by brushing her hair back as she looked out to sea. She must have watched her for over twenty minutes on that beach, not wanting to share her, but then she had to have someone confirm that she was real. If only she hadn't had to leave back to Mindoir the very next day. It might have been her and not Pierce sharing Hannah's bed. Okay, maybe not … but she could dream, couldn't she? When she found out that Pierce was seeing her … a part of her wanted to cry foul.

She didn't see Hannah again until the wedding a year later. She had thought that the sight on the beach that day was perfection, until she stood next to Pierce as his "best man". Pierce not only made her the best man, but had even let her wear a tux … damn she loved that man! But as she stood next to him that day, hell the two friends both sucked in their breaths when the church doors opened and Hannah appeared in her white wedding dress. Pierce started to tear and Birgit was about to tease him when she realized that she was tearing to. As the veiled woman slowly came down the aisle to the wedding march, Birgit felt her heart in her throat and a throb between her legs. She loved Pierce but in that moment she wanted to knock him out of the way and take his place. When Hannah had looked at her briefly as she took Pierce's hand, Birgit caught her breath again. When Pierce turned to her for the ring, she almost didn't let him have it. He had to gently but firmly yank it away as she fought back the strong desire to kick his feet out from under him and propose to the bride. When Pierce said I do to Hannah, Birgit said it too … Pierce and Hannah both turned to look at her, _shit Bacchus! I said it out loud, didn't I? Motherfuck!_ Pierce smiled and Hannah turned back to Pierce.

Now standing at the kitchen door she saw the pastor typing away and _shit Bacchus, she's wearing her glasses_ … Birgit groaned. _Why must you be wearing them now?_ Call it the librarian turn on but the pastor in her glasses was just too much for Birgit. _Focus! She is nothing more than a woman! A beautiful woman! The woman that you love! Shut up! _She took a deep breath and then softly knocked on the screen door. Hannah looked up and when she saw the Sheriff she gave a small smile as she removed them. Birgit opened the door, came into the kitchen but just a few steps in, "Good evening, Pastor."

"Good evening, Sheriff." Hannah motioned for Birgit to take a seat but Birgit declined and told herself, _just talk to her like the rest!_ Hannah waited and Birgit struggled to find her voice. She was even struggling to look directly at the Pastor. All these years and the two women rarely interacted together. It was Birgit that kept a respectful distance … Hannah was a lady and Birgit. _Shit, you ain't no good_. She always told herself. _You don't deserve to even be in the same room as her!_ Hannah could see that the Sheriff was struggling so she looked at her empty tea cup and stood to get more. Birgit flushed when the Pastor stood. She was wearing a simple white terry cloth robe that stopped just above her knees and as she stood up it had opened just enough that Birgit caught a quick glimpse of her breast. Hannah pulled the robe closer as she turned to walk to the stove and asked the Sheriff if she would like a cup. Birgit was looking at the back of Hannah's legs as she half choked out, "No thank you pastor." She felt hot as the pastor reached up for the tea in the cupboard, revealing more of her legs. _See, you ain't no good! You shouldn't be having these thoughts. God is gonna strike you dead one day._ Hannah placed the tea bag in her cup and the Sheriff looked at her hand that was dunking the bag, thinking about those beautiful hands touching her, the long fingers stroking her cheek and … and … _Shit Baccus! Hell, I'm telling you! Straight to hell! _

The guilt over where her mind had gone made her drop her eyes to the floor in shame _… Focus! Focus! Dammit!_ "Huh, pastor." Hannah looked over at her and Birgit cleared her throat as she took two more steps into the kitchen, "I've been meeting with all of the religious n-" _nuts_, she had almost said "… erh, people … well, about this weekend's planned protest." Hannah, as she stirred the cream in her tea, started walking back over to the kitchen table as she looked at the Sheriff. Birgit looked at the tea kettle, stood up taller and began her speech … to the tea kettle, "We don't want any trouble or people getting hurt. So you as the leader of your community have a responsibility to make sure that your church doesn't do anything out of line. I just want a nice peaceful …" The pastor had said something and it now had broken through her little speechmaking moment. "Did you say something?"

Hannah was looking at her Bible on the table, "I said that neither my congregation nor I will be at that protest, Sheriff." Birgit was at a loss for words. Every church, school board member, PTA committee member and politicians were going to be there. Hannah looked up from the table and saw that the Sheriff was confused, "Anything else, Sheriff?"

Birgit shook her head and turned to leave. _What the hell? I know that every self-righteous prick will be there, but also the decent folk will be there too._ As Birgit closed the door behind her she stopped at the foot of the steps. _If the pastor ain't there … people might talk. I'll fuckin' break their necks if anyone says a word!_ Two more steps toward the garage out back._ The community is going to be there, why not you?_ Hannah had sat down and waited. She knew that the Sheriff would be back. She knew that she had left confused. Hannah sat sipping her tea looking at the door. "Pastor," Hannah smiled as the Sheriff slowly opened the door again, "Uh, can I ask why your church won't be there to protest the whores?" Hannah flinched at the word, as did Marguex inside her. That damaged girl hidden away cried out as she crawled behind Hannah. Birgit saw that the word had upset the pastor, _You fuckwit! You don't use those words around the pastor!_ " Shit! I'm sorry pastor … fuck, I didn't mean to say shit … ah, damn …" _And there we have it, folks. I'm sliding into hell as fast as I can._

Hannah saw that the Sheriff was losing it and placed her hand on her arm, "It's okay Sheriff. Please." Birgit was breathing hard like she had just gone a few rounds in a boxing ring. "I have heard those words before," she smiled, "I am, after all, married to your best friend and have been for the past thirteen years. He has used those words a time or two." Birgit returned the smile as Hannah sat down. "Are you sure that you don't want a cup of tea?"

Birgit shook her head no as she looked down at the pastor. The only lights in the kitchen were over the stove and from the notebook. As the light from the notebook lit Hannah, Birgit felt butterflies in her stomach … strike that. Bats. She saw what her friend, Pierce, must have seen in their bedroom. Birgit imagined that they were in that very room and the pastor was sitting on the bed. As she felt herself slipping into her little fantasy, with the help of the alcohol, the pastor asked, "What baby?" Birgit almost answered, "I want you," when she realized that the words weren't meant for her. Shepard was standing just in the kitchen from the living room.

"Can I have a glass of water?" The little girl asked as she scratched her cheek. "Hiya Aunt B."

Hannah turned to her daughter and motioned her over to the sink. Birgit watched the two as Hannah poured her daughter a glass of water, then brushed back Shepard's hair as the kid gulped it down. Hannah whispered motherly words of love to her daughter as she guided her back to bed. Birgit had looked down at the glasses placed on the Bible and sighed. _I love you pastor … but you and Pierce, the kid … this is where you belong. If all I'm allowed is to be close … see you … that's all I deserve. And this is enough. _Birgit was about to leave when Hannah reappeared and stood before the Sheriff. "You asked why my church will not be there." Birgit nodded as the pastor picked up her glasses. "I heard a story about a man once," the pastor started as she sat down. "It seems that there was this woman caught in adultery by her community. Their law, their religious law, condemned this woman to death."

"Holy shit!" Birgit responded. Looking embarrassed at her slip up again, but relaxed when she saw the pastor smile.

"This law even gave them the right to personally do it by stoning." Birgit's eyes got bigger as she sat down at the table. "But that wasn't enough for their self-righteous, perverted and cold hearts. No. They wanted to put a holy man on trial as well by throwing the condemned woman, the Law of Moses and personal choices at his feet. This man ... this righteous man looked at these people; at their spiritual emptiness … their own sin and he challenged them with it. He said that the one among them who was pure, that person could throw the first stone."

Birgit shook her head and as she stood back up said, "That woman was lucky you weren't there." The Sheriff realized how that sounded and quickly added, "Not that you would have thrown the rock … only that you are -"

"Without sin?" Hannah finished the sentenced. She sighed, stood up and placed a hand on Birgit's arm, "I assure you, Sheriff, I least of all could pick up that stone." Birgit looked into her eyes finding that hard to believe. "It was that kindness, that forgiveness that I needed. That man ... that forgiving spirit is who I follow. So, no ... my church will not be there to carry signs or throw rocks." Shepard's bed creaked again and Hannah shook her head, "Please excuse me, my little girl is trying to push her mother over the edge tonight." Hannah took two steps toward the living room, stopped then looked over her shoulder, "Or she is here to ensure that I practice what I preach; Understanding and forgiveness." Birgit watched Hannah disappear into the living room as she headed for Shepard's bedroom and Birgit fell deeper in love with her. _Shit Bacchus! Even her sermons are beautiful. That was a sermon, right? Ah, hell! I don't care … I love her_.

* * *

As Birgit came back into the garage she was smiling. Pierce chuckled, "Should I be jealous? You were in there longer than I expected." He and the boys had been laughing at what was probably going on in the kitchen since she had left. They all knew how tongue tied she got around the pastor.

"I bet you 20 chits that B is stuttering right now," Stu had laughed as he checked on the cut on his arm.

"I bet 40 chits that she isn't even talking!" Rowan had raised the bet.

Pierce looked at the two, "I don't think the preacher understands her. I'm just glad that she doesn't know how B really feels about her."

Stu choked on his beer as Rowan added, "Who does understand her? That woman, as much as I love her, is crazy. Fickin' crazy!"

Stu shook his head, "If the pastor knew that B went into heat around her … I bet she would ban her from your home."

Birgit upon arriving back looked at the three men with their shit-eating grins and flipped them off as she went to her seat. "Fuck all of you!"

Rowan bent forward, "So Sheriff … did you lay down the law?"

As the men roared with laughter, Birgit smiled … "I was too busy listening to a sermon."

Pierce leaned back, took a puff on his cigar and teased, "And I bet, it was the sexiest sermon you ever heard!"

Birgit looked at her best friend. "Fuck you!"

* * *

When Hannah had walked into her daughter's room, Shepard's face was pressed against the fish tank and she was whispering to Firefly. Hannah swatted her behind, pointed to the bed, watched as the little girl crawled back in under the covers and then tucked her in, yet again. Shepard had her arms crossed over her chest, bottom lip pouting and eyebrows furrowed as her mother lectured her on the bedtime rules. As her daughter continued to look mad and defiant, Hannah directed the little girl to "pick up that lip and unloose your eyebrows, Elizabeth Whisper Shepard." Shepard softened her look and then squinched her eyes shut, hoping that her mother would go away. Hannah bent down next to her stubborn daughter's ear and teased, "No matter how hard you try Whisper, you'll always love me more than pizza." Shepard fought giggling and Hannah kissed her. Then as Hannah went to turn off Shepard's light she looked at the child and whispered, "And if I have to come back in here again, your bartending days are over. You hear me?"

Back in the kitchen, Hannah leaned at the back door listening to the noise from the unrepentant four. She knew that the Sheriff loved her in a romantic way. After all, Hannah understood more than her husband and his friends thought. She even knew how her glasses affected the Sheriff, so she always removed them when the woman was around. She was careful around Birgit, trying not to toy with her emotions or make things worse. When she had looked up and seen the Sheriff she had wished that she hadn't changed into her robe. But she couldn't change without sending some kind of message, so she acted as if it was nothing. She hoped that the Sheriff would find a woman that would bring comfort into her life; she even kept Birgit in her nightly prayers.

As Hannah sat back down at the kitchen table she thought of Lisa Hale. Lisa had just arrived to Highland Falls working for the New Horizon Hospital and began attending Hannah's church after she heard good things about the pastor around town. After attending for a month and seeing how kind the pastor was, she had asked to speak in private with her. She had shared her life story, including her sexuality, and asked if she would still be welcome at the church. Hannah saw that Lisa had a good heart so she had smiled and hugged her. This had made Lisa cry and Hannah began inviting her to dinner about three times a week. As she turned back to her notebook she thought Lisa might complement Birgit, but she had never played matchmaker. _Maybe ...hmm, I should talk to Pierce. We could have them both over for a barbeque or a small dinner party._


	10. Impetuous Dominoes

The party downstairs was muted as Liara curled up on her bed, exhausted from her little adventure. After lying for a few minutes on the terrace, she had slid carefully down the hall, crawling here, ducking there as she made her way to her bedroom suite. She had hoped that Shiala would come to her room but the acolyte had not made an appearance as of yet. _She's probably back to enjoying the party_. _Well, I'm glad that she can forget about this mess and have fun. _Liara's mind went back to Shiala in the reading room and ... _The reading room! Oh, Goddess! The reading room! _Liara's stomach turned as she thought of the destruction. _Mother is going to … to … oh! What am I going to tell her? _Liara got up in a panic, raced to the sink in her washroom, tapped the spigot and splashed the water on her face. _Calm down Liara! Mother … mother is with the Councilor … she is too busy with the Councilor, the party … I have plenty of time to solve this._ Liara dried her face, turned off the washroom light and stretched out on the bed, closing her eyes. _Just relax ... you can fix all this later._

* * *

The Matriarch was at that very moment standing in her reading room, Shiala standing next to her, inspecting the crime scene of her daughter's latest escapade. Shiala swallowed hard as she looked at Benezia who was saying nothing and showing no emotion. As they stood there the rod that had once so proudly held the expensive drapes finally gave in and came crashing down. This created a domino effect as the painting of Benezia's mother was knocked off the wall which in turn fell on a desk, scattering books and smashing a vase holding flowers. "Of course," Benezia frowned. She then began following the trail of books that were leading out to the terrace, stopping once to touch the tear in the painting of her mother. Shiala started to say something but the Matriarch held up her hand. She then walked out to the terrace and looked at the destruction of the bookcase and the ripped curtain. She looked back at Shiala, who was placing the torn painting against the wall on the floor. She licked her finger and tried fixing the tear, as the Matriarch rolled her eyes and frowned.

Earlier, while Liara was hiding behind plants, crawling under tables, pressed against walls on her way to her bedroom, the Matriarch was greeting Shiala in her private sitting room. A glass of thopevo was offered to her as she was escorted over to the Matriarch. The Councilor Tevos saw the young acolyte approach and she excused herself, smiling at the Matriarch. _Be kind. She is young_. The Matriarch tilted her head slightly to show understanding and then greeted Shiala. She inquired about the acolyte's evening and if she was enjoying herself. Shiala assured her that all of the acolytes present were having a wonderful time and thanked her for her kindness. "No, thank you," Benezia smiled. "I am so glad that you are having a nice time." She then escorted her acolyte out to the private terrace and as she pulled Shiala close, said softly, "I love this view … why the things that I can see from here can be so enlightening." Shiala looked around and froze when she saw the terrace to the reading room. The Matriarch smiled. "Shall we go for a walk?"

And walk they did … They walked all the way to the reading room with Shiala's heart beating faster and faster the closer they got to that place of destruction. Now here Shiala was, watching the Matriarch look at all the damage while Liara was off god knows where. "Do you know what might have happened here, Shiala?" The Matriarch asked as she bent down and picked up the expensive fabric torn from its place of honor.

Shiala knew that the Matriarch had seen something from her terrace, but wasn't sure how much. She debated on how much to reveal but when the Matriarch looked straight at her, the whole story spilled out. She couldn't have stopped it if she tried. From the conversation in Liara's bedroom to the professor's entrance in the reading room … Shiala rattled everything off. She even told the Matriarch about an incident of dishonesty from her own youth. _Oh, Goddess! What are you doing? Shiala stop before you tell her about_ … and yes, she kept going. The Matriarch just stood there as Shiala splattered everything, every little secret out … By the time that the young acolyte was finished, she had confessed everything from birth to that night, then prostrated herself at the feet of the Matriarch as tears continued to fall and begged for forgiveness.

The Matriarch shook her head at her young acolyte and told her to get up and dry her tears. She then walked over to the railing and sat down on a seat that gave her a perfect view of her and her daughter's suites. _Professor Nicia T'Lemk? Of all the choices and you pick Professor Nicia T'Lemk?_ The Matriarch was angry. _Liara what are you thinking? This … this is your choice?_ Benezia sighed. _How do I protect you? Oh, Goddess Athame, bless me with wisdom._ A loud crash came from inside the reading room as a row of books finally gave up the ghost and fell over. _And strength!_

The Matriarch went back into the reading room, eyed the latest disaster and then instructed Shiala and Alestia to locate the professor. "Shiala you will stay with the professor, since you two have history," Shiala shifted embarrassed, "and Alestia you will report back here." Benezia then instructed her private companion, Kyriake, to locate her daughter, "Hopefully she is not hanging from a terrace or destroying another room." She then went back to the seat by the railing and looked out again at her daughter's room. _How do I save you from this horrible choice? If only … _The Matriarch sometimes wished that she wasn't raising her daughter alone. Wished that she had someone to turn to when challenges arose. And with her daughter, there were challenges. Liara was bright but she was still young and the combination sometimes resulted in disaster.

The image of a very young Liara running through the great hall, fire trailing behind her as acolytes in a panic chased after her. Benezia had lost another fine drape, two tapestries, three hundred and six books, four paintings, two vases and a beautiful chair that day. That was known in the T'Soni house as "The Great Prothean Fire of 2127" ... A history book that Benezia had given Liara had included how the protheans had first learned to make fire. Liara had built her little tinder nest in the same reading room that she had once again left her mark in this very evening. "What is it with this room, Liara, that inspires you to destroy?" Benezia shook her head as the many "great experiments" that her daughter had performed throughout the years raced through her mind. But her daughter was destined for greater things and her mother just knew it … or at least believed it. Hoped for. But it all depended on Benezia making sure that her daughter survived her maiden years.

* * *

Liara had drifted off to sleep and was now dreaming … She was standing in front of a painting of Ilos that had beautiful shades of red, orange and yellow. As she admired the pillars, statues and waterfall, the colors began to move and swirl around. Then slowly the painting began breathing, pulling her towards it and she heard words coming from behind the waterfall. They were telling her that she needed to hurry. Time was short. She didn't understand and as she cried out the painting began to melt away. She tried stopping the paint from running down, saving it, but it kept running and began to cover her, to blind her. She started to scream as the colors buried her, the panic she felt was paralyzing … then a hand reached into the lake of paint, pulled her out and as she began to wipe away the paint from her eyes, the hand stopped her. "You don't need to see," a soft voice said with a hint of humor and then another voice ... a serious voice cut in, "Trust your instincts, Liara. Move carefully …Don't lose your way. She'll need you." As the hand let go of her, Liara went back to wiping away the paint from her eyes as the ground beneath her began to shake. She screamed as the second voice now farther away was heard to say, "You must be strong!" The first voice, still light in tone, whispered, "Shhh, be calm." Liara came to with a start and looked around her room. She slowly got up and went out onto her terrace.

Benezia shifted on her seat to hide in the shadows as she saw her daughter appear from her room. Liara leaned to look over at her mother's terrace as the Matriarch shook her head. Liara then appeared to be looking at various terraces in search of … _The professor? Or are you looking for me_? Benezia could only guess what her young daughter was up to and looked over at the torn painting of her own mother leaning against the wall. _You would have loved her Mother … She is just like you_. Dianthe T'Soni was soft-spoken and gentle in nature like Liara as well as fiercely stubborn. She had not found anyone who could turn her head until she met the huntress Lioneka and she followed the tradition of old and mated with her. She believed that daughters of the asari race alone were worthy of Thessia ... not the "diatheirós" as she called off-spring obtained using other races. Benezia adored her mother and even after death she made sure that her daughter was acceptable for her. But this had been a struggle for her younger sister who did not want that strike against her or her daughter. Benezia had given her sister approval to use an outsider saying that their mother would have understand. That wasn't really true but she loved her sister and could see that she would not be strong enough to take the potential backlash. Her daughter was even like Dianthe in that ... once when she had taken Liara to Palaven on holiday to visit an old friend, Liara was shocked and appaled that a turian had found her attractive. "How could he even think that I would find him pleasing?" she had asked. This made Benezia laugh at the memory even now.

Dianthe appeared to be looking back at Benezia accusatory which made her smile. _Yes, mother and a little like me_. Benezia also had never found another species attractive and like Dianthe had not found anyone to turn her head until later in life. It still pained her that it had not lasted ... that she could not make it last. She turned back to her daughter's terrace and it was now empty. Benezia sighed then slowly stood up, straightened her dress and headed for the door. _Matriarch and hostess first, mother later_.

Liara had returned inside to her private suite and was sitting on the side of her bed; looking at her dress … It had torn open down the front during the climb with dirt stains accusing her of her cowardice. _And I just bought this!_ She stood and stepped out of the torn and dirty dress. The night was a little warmer than usual and the sound of the party could be heard coming from the terrace now that she had opened up the doors. She thought of her dream and the words "She'll need you!" and she wondered, _Nicia? Does she need me?_ Liara heard a couple talking just outside her door about the Matriarch and the wonderful party. Then one of them mentioned her and Liara stiffened. She braced herself for the word _pureblood_ but the word never came. She heard the words "lovely", "graceful" and "delicate". She leaned against one of the doors and smiled. The voices slowly faded as the guests made their way back downstairs. Liara placed a hand on her bare breast, slid on her sandals and opened her door. _She'll need you _ringing in her ears.

Shiala was near the professor on the main terrace when she saw Liara. She had never seen Liara wear nothing to one of these events and it caught her breath. While other guests took no notice, the acolyte knew that this was a sign of change in her. Liara made her way towards Nicia and as she drew close, Nicia smiled and they touched. _No. No. No._ Shiala panicked as she saw them touch not as friends, but lovers. Shiala confused drew closer, holding her breath but not over the edge since she knew that the Matriarch was in the reading … _room?_ _Oh, Goddess!_ The Matriarch was standing just a few feet away as she watched her daughter remove the gold belly chain off the professor and the professor place it on Liara. Shiala began to hop around the guests waving her hand above the crowd trying to get Liara's attention. As Liara and Nicia kissed, Shiala fainted as she saw the look on the Matriarch's face. While the crowd nearby turned to face the young asari passed out on the floor, the Matriarch and her daughter looked at one another. Nicia followed her lover's attention and when she saw the Matriarch she slipped a finger through the gold chain around her lover and smiled at Benezia.

Liara started towards her mother, but the Matriarch shifted her body, tilted her head and Liara understood. _I am disappointed daughter. Approach carefully. _As the three faced each other, Shiala was being helped out of the room to a more private place by acolytes. As she passed Liara she could be heard mumbling to herself, "Run. No. No. Painting ripped. Trouble. Matria-"

Liara took a deep breath and took her lover by the hand, walked to her mother and half-whispered, "Mother, I would like to introduce Professor Nicia T'Lemk … my, my."

Nicia touched Liara's waist and with a smile finished, "…erotas."

While guests continued to mingle, unaware of what was happening; Matriarchs Aleta and Nephele were off to the side watching the event. The two asari knew by movement what was playing before them. Aleta whispered, "Isn't that the Professor T'Lemk?"

Nephele said yes. "It appears that she has set her desire on Benezia's daughter."

Aleta shook her head, "No. Her desire is the inner circle of the Matriarch. Liara is the key. This will not end well."

The Matriarch looked at the arrogant smile on the professor, the smile that said "I have her and there is nothing that you can do but accept me now." Benezia appeared calm but Nephele, Aleta and Liara all knew the storm raging behind that calm facade. The two Matriarchs looked at each other as they thought of the strategy that Benezia would take. "The matron thinks that she has the upper hand," Aleta shook her head. "Why do they always think that they can hold their own against us?" Then the two Matriarchs laughed quietly at the ignorance of the matron then clinked their glasses of thopevo together and began circulating.

_You think that you have her_. The Matriarch thought as she smiled. _Enjoy her while you can_. Liara could tell that her mother was not only angry … she was … _hurt?_ Liara had never hurt her mother, not that she could remember. Made her angry? Yes. Hurt her? No. She lowered her head as the professor enjoyed the attentions of the Matriarch. Nicia was so busy relishing in the fact that everyone could see the Matriarch giving her undivided attention to her … Professor Nicia T'Lemk … that she didn't notice Liara's head down, but the Matriarch did. Benezia seeing her daughter and sensing the shame, looked away from the professor and raised her daughter's face by her chin, brushed her cheek against her and whispered, "It's okay, Little Wing." But Liara knew it wasn't. She had made a terrible mistake.

Nicia purred, "You have a beautiful home, Matriarch Benezia … and a beautiful daughter."

The Matriarch smiled again, "Thank you, Professor T'Lemk. You are too kind."

Nicia, not seeing behind the wall of the Matriarch, relaxed, "I told her that you would see the wisdom in her decision. I wanted you to know that she had picked someone older and wiser than some silly maiden."

"Silly," The Matriarch looked at her daughter. "Yes, a maiden would be silly." Liara started to drop her head again but her mother stopped her. "Liara, show your … erotas around our home." _Because this will be the one and only time that this vile thing will ever set foot in our home again. And if she does anything that crushes your spirit ... I will crush her without hesitation!_

"Yes, mother" Liara took Nicia by the arm and led her away.

Benezia watched them move through the crowd … Councilor Tevos and her mate Matriarch Lidanya approached, "She is using her," Lidanya said simply.

"Yes." Benezia kept looking at her daughter.

"What is your plan?" Tevos asked.

"She wants my attention, my influence and the access to my home. She will have none."

"She will take it out on Liara." Tevos stated.

"Liara is stronger than she thinks." Benezia looked at Tevos. "If I thought that this would destroy her, the professor would not see tomorrow. As it is, Liara will need to learn a few lessons that include pain."

Tevos sighed, "If only we could spare our daughters pain."

"If only." Benezia agreed. "But to do so … it would just keep them weak and silly. Our daughters must suffer to gain strength and wisdom."

* * *

Later that evening, after all the guests were gone and the house was quiet, the two T'Soni females were each in their private suites.

The Matriarch sat on her terrace thinking about her daughter and about the pain she was going to experience. How Benezia could not help her this time. Feeling helpless, she cried.

Liara was in her washroom, where she had started her shower. She slowly removed the gold chain and looked in the mirror. Feeling ashamed of her impetuous act after her dream ... ashamed of the pain that she caused her mother ... she placed her hands on her breasts, feeling exposed and cried.


	11. Ghost & Mediation

She fought back the tears, fought back crying as he penetrated her, fought the desire to make him come too quickly. She had denied him for the past seven months and now on their 16th anniversary and just two days after her 47th birthday, Hannah couldn't keep denying him any longer. The look of hurt, frustration and even anger could be seen on her husband's face as she rejected him at every turn. He had even stopped coming home straight from work and she suspected that he had started visiting the Knocking Shop down in the mining community. This would not have bothered her, if she had thought that this would be something he wanted. _He has been lying with a whore every night for almost sixteen years_, Hannah had thought just two months prior. _So why not lie with one honestly, at least she will do the things that I ... I won't. Not with you. That would make you like them. _In their sexual life she had never been on her knees, never let him penetrate her anywhere but vaginally and he never complained. He always seemed content with anything that she gave him … and his willingness to accept her partially in everything, sometimes made her hate him. No, not hate him. She just wanted him to break through her pain, break down her walls. She wanted him to see Marguex, to see that part of her hidden away and bring her to the light … bring her to the light and say that he loved that part of her too.

He was struggling to not ejaculate too quickly. It had been so long that when she had kissed him, really kissed him and guided him to their bed he wanted to please her. He had always felt a capable lover with every woman he'd been with … every woman, except for her. He worshipped his wife ... just the way she would smile made his heart race ... even after all these years when she looked at him and brushed his cheek made him swell with pride that she had picked him. He watched as she walked down the street, saw how people admired her, loved her and it made him tear up. She had taken his last name ... given him a daughter and loved him. And when she wanted, she had a way of heating him up and just a shift in her hip, her hand sliding down his backside, her eyes looking into his, whispers in parle-vous never failed to result in the dreaded premature E. Tonight, he was intent on that not happening. Maybe if he could please her just once. Make her lose control. He wanted to please her, to be in charge this time. So he didn't look into her eyes, he tried humming in his head so that the sound of her voice didn't filter through and her hands, thank the Bacchus were pressed against his chest tonight. So he focused, painfully focused as he moved deep and hard. _Tonight, I will satisfy you Hannah. Tonight, I'll be the man that you deserve_.

She was trying to not use her tricks on him tonight. She knew how to make a man come quickly, a trick you learn when you spend time servicing them and little Marguex was a bright girl. She could read people and over time this gave her an advantage. She would read the response of the johns as she touched them. She would read them to get control ... Contrary to popular opinion, no man was the same; each required something just a little different if you wanted to control them. She even recognized and encouraged a politician's fetish of arm pits … Once she had encouraged him, all he wanted to do was smell hers while he jacked himself off. Understanding what sexually excited sometimes led her customers away from really touching her, at least down there. Yes, Marguex had been a bright girl. Now, years later she was trying to not make it quick. She was trying to let the man on top of her prolong his pleasure. She had her hands pressed against his chest as he pushed in and out, trying to at least keep some distance from him … no matter how slight. She was not whispering in her native tongue, not moving her hips, not touching him in his weak spots. And now as she had her head turned, fighting back the tears, she thought she heard him humming.

* * *

ARE YOU KIDDING ME? THEY HAVE TENTACLES ON THEIR HEAD! AND THEY ARE BLUE! Shepard typed to Ricky on her netbook. She took a drink of her tea and looked over at her model of the Serenity as she waited for his response. Normally they would do a vid-con but with it being so late and her head set torn to bits by her Gordon Setter named Moonie … they were just texting so neither of their parents would hear them chatting.

WHAT? ASARI ARE FRICKIN HOT! AND BRODER SAYS THAT THEY HAVE SEX WITH ANYTHING. ANYTHING!

Shepard laughed when the words popped up. "You frickin' dog," She whispered as she typed back, I DON'T THINK THAT THEY WOULD HAVE SEX WITH YOU RICKSTER. NOTHING WOULD TOUCH YOU! NOT EVEN KAY TRIPINSKI! HA! HA!

Shepard picked up her 13th birthday gift from her dad, a Gibson guitar, smiled and pulled the pick from beneath the strings of the neck, "What's that?" she looked over at her dog, "You say that you want to hear _I Wouldn't Treat A Dog (The Way You Treated Me)?_ Okay." She was strumming when her netbook blipped and Ricky's response popped up, I SAID ANYTHING! THAT MEANS THAT EVEN SOMEONE LIKE ME MIGHT HAVE A CHANCE. HECK, EVEN YOU COULD GET LAID! I CAN JUST SEE YOU WITH A BLUE BABE!

Shepard laughed, shook her head, and typed, NOT IN A MILLION YEARS! YOU ASS! I'LL STICK WITH HUMANS! She strummed a little more as she pushed back on her chair, foot on her desk. Moonie raised his head and barked, causing Shepard to jump up and hold his mouth shut. "Shhhh," she quieted her dog. "Momma can't know you're in the house." Moonie had been another birthday gift just three months prior from her Aunt and her partner of two years, Lisa Hale. Of course, this was only after they had received approval from Hannah. At the birthday party when they had brought the dog over Shepard excitedly promised that she would feed the dog, walk the dog and never let the dog in the house. Her and Pierce had built a really nice dog house next to the garage ... it even looked like the garage but it never used it. Nope. Moonie was either in her room or in the actual garage.

WAIT! WEREN'T YOU THE ONE WHO WAS GOING TO MARRY A KROGAN JUST A FEW YEARS AGO? AND MOVE TO TUCHANKA AS WELL? SO YOU WOULD RATHER BE WITH A BIG REPTILE INSTEAD OF A BLUE SQUID? SIZE DOES MATTER?

Shepard read the response as she held Moonie and laughed. She kissed her dog, told him to pipe down, picked her guitar back up and then resting against it began typing back; I WAS JUST A DUMB KID THEN! AND IT WASN'T JUST ANY KROGAN. IT WAS BEAST! HE DOESN'T REALLY COUNT. AND YOU ARE REALLY GROWING UP INTO A PERV.

RIGHT. I'M THE PERV? CAN I BE YOUR BEST MAN? HUH, KROGAN LOVER!

The clock on her netbook read 12:02 and Shepard realized that she was hungry. FINE. YOU CAN BE MY BEST MAN. SQUID LOVER! BE BACK – RAIDING FRIDGE.

GOOD IDEA! WE HAVE SPAGHETTI IN THE FRIDGE. YOU?

MOMMA'S ROASTED CHICKEN. YUM!

Shepard put her Gibson on the bed, slowly opened her bedroom door, peeked out and then carefully headed for the kitchen, leaving her dog to stand watch on the bed.

She thought that she heard her parent's bed creak, smirked and tip-toed faster to the kitchen. She hoped that her parents were "celebrating" their anniversary, but she didn't want to hear it. _Yuck-L-Frickin-Yuck!_ She thought. She had caught them once when she was around six. Someone had come to the door and so she had raced into their room to tell them. That was the first time that she had seen a male butt ... eck! She never again went into her parents room until she had knocked LOUDLY and heard a "come in" from them. Nope. Lesson learned.

_Hello chicken_, Shepard whispered as she pulled the plate of leftovers out. _Let's not forget your friends Mr. Cheese and Ms. Tomatoes._ Just as she placed them on the kitchen counter she heard a loud crash coming from her parents' room. Lesson learned forgotten at the sound of danger, she grabbed the butcher knife from the block and raced into the bedroom. She found her mother curled up and crying in bed so she rushed to her, layed the knife on the night stand and began cradling her, "Momma, what's wrong?" Her mother clutched on to her as she continued to cry which was scaring Shepard. She had never seen her mother cry ... not once. Well, she had seen her tear up out of pride, cry out of joy but not this ... she had never seen her cry in pain. Just as she stroked her mother's hair she heard movement coming from her parents' bathroom and as she continued to hold her mother, she grabbed the knife again. She pointed it towards the door without realizing what she was doing, only that she needed to protect her mother.

Hannah looked up, saw her daughter holding the knife towards the bathroom door ... pointing it where her husband was and pushed her daughter away. Shepard caught off guard, fell off the bed and Hannah yelled at her to get out of her room. Shepard struggled to her feet, confused and tried to touch her mother. "Elizabeth, get out of this room now!" She repeated, as she pulled the covers over her bare body.

Pierce opened the bathroom door, jeans barely pulled up, grabbed his boots and mumbled "I'm going out." As he headed for the front door Hannah, seeing the pain in her husband's face, curled up on the bed out of shame at what she had done. Shepard looked at her mother and knew that if her dad left, their life would forever be changed. That he wouldn't come back. That her mother would not be the same. That none of them would. So she told her momma that everything would be alright, that she would fix this as she dropped the knife and chased after her father.

The jeep jerked to life just as Shepard jumped in front of it, arms out … "Daddy!"

Pierce yelled at his daughter to go back in the house, "Eli! Go back in now!" He did not want her to see him this way and he really wanted a drink. He needed to clear his head ... he needed to get as far away from Hannah as he could.

Shepard refused to move, "Not until you tell me what you did to momma!"

Pierce looked at his kid, standing firm in front of his jeep and wished he knew. He had been trying to please her and then she started pushing him away, "Stop. Please." He thought that if he slowed down it might make her change her mind, but then he heard her crying as she continued to plead that he stop. Stop touching her. Stop loving her. He had quickly pulled out, but kept his body against her as he tried to comfort her. He had asked what was wrong but she wouldn't answer. She would only say "I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

Instead of just holding her ... calming her, hell he was hurt. So he had pushed her to tell him "what the fuck is wrong?" ... his frustration moving towards anger.

She could feel him holding her tighter, pressing against her, his jaw locked in anger and so she had found herself getting angry, seeing him as one of the soiled men of long ago and she cried against him, "I can't stand you touching me! Being on top of me! It sickens me!"

Those words stung him! He had moved quickly from her, grabbed his jeans and went into the bathroom. As he put on his jeans he saw his reflection. _You're 45 fuckin' years old! A fuckin' grown man and you can't please her. Still! She doesn't love you! Fuck! You sicken her! You sic-_ Tears began to burn down his cheeks and he picked up his bottle of aftershave cologne and threw it at his reflection … His face shattering into a thousand pieces. _Fuck this! Fuck all of this! I can find a woman who will want me! Any woman at the pub would say yes ... fuck this life!_

Hannah had tried to please him, but the pain was burying her. She had found the tears too strong, too heavy to keep inside and as they escaped she begged him to stop. When he wouldn't stop, when he kept stabbing her between the legs she cried out. "Stop! Please!" Then when he wouldn't just stop and give her space, but kept trying to get her to tell him what was wrong … she had struck out! She knew how to hurt him; she knew not only how to please a man but how to break a man. Telling him that she couldn't stand his touch … That he _sickened_ her! She knew that she might as well have put a knife into his heart.

Then when she saw her daughter standing there with a knife … the memories flooded back. She was the same age as her mother when she … when she had killed her. She had driven a knife over and over into that body that was a haven to a cold, black, corrupted heart. That body that had carried her ... gave birth to her. She had remembered the look of surprise that had replaced her mother's sneer in that moment. How many times she had brought that knife down before the blade broke she couldn't say. Her own heart froze up at the sight of her daughter holding a knife, ready to use it. She had wanted to shake her daughter. _You will never be like me! You will never be like her! You will never have blood on your hands! Never! _

As she lay in the empty room she heard her mother, _Poor, poor Marguex. I always said that you were a bright girl. You always knew how to manipulate when you wanted something. But tonight ... _Hannah saw the knife on the floor, _You thought that I was dead … Dead and buried. But I live just as sure as you still spread your legs. _She heard her mother laugh. _Yes, my pigeon … I live on in your daughter ... my granddaughter. We both do!_ "She's not like us!" Hannah fought. _Oh, but she is. She has my anger and your ability to kill … n'est-ce pas?_ Hannah sat up, placing her hands over her ears. _Even in hell I hear things … her fights, her temper tantrums. And tonight … she would have killed her own father. She would have killed him for you. _Hannah, no Marguex tried to block out the sound of her mother. Still her spirit continued, _You saw the look in her face. You should know it. You were … what? Only three years older than her and I was your age exactly when you sent me to hell … isn't that right? You were drenched in my blood ... drenched and laughing! Do you remember how you swore at me and laughed? And now you are a pastor! People see you as a ... a saint? Qui est inestimable! _Hannah could hear her mother laugh, that bitter laugh! As she had killed her she had thought it was her mother laughing that bitter ... that bit- but no. It was her laughing as her mother as she tore into her. _Just three more years and she will show her true side! Not even your empty god can stop her anger from taking over or keep her from killing! And she will kill. There is nothing you can do, my petit pigeon._ Hannah crawled out of bed and as she pulled on her robe whispered, "My daughter, my Whisper, is not like us. She is a good person, a loving person … she is Pierce's daughter. She has his blood to wash ours away. She is a Shepard not a Levasseur."

* * *

Pierce was still sitting in his jeep, demanding that his daughter go back in the house. But Shepard continued to stand in front of him. She didn't understand what was happening but she knew that she could not let him leave. "Daddy! Please don't leave. I need you here ... Momma needs you."

Pierce hung his head as he turned the jeep off and Shepard ran over to him, jumping up on the jeep just in case he tried to trick her. _If only she did need him ... want him,_ he thought as his shoulders dropped. _If only she loved me half as much ... hell, even a quarter as much as I do her_. He looked up at his kid, their kid and he swallowed hard before he croaked out, "It's okay Eli. Everything will be okay ... I promise." As he looked at his daughter he saw her ... his wife peeking out in her. The kid was already beautiful and he knew that if she continued to look more and more like the preacher ... she would need him to sit on the porch with a shotgun. She would need protection.

"Daddy, I'll be better," his mini-Hannah said, "I can help ... I'll be good and make momma happier." He saw the fear, the desperation in his daughter's face and he began to cry. _Shit Pierce! You can't let her see you like this! _Shepard put her arms around her father, "I can make it better, daddy. I promise!"

Hannah came outside and saw her husband and daughter holding each other. She saw the only two people in her life that had ever really mattered, that she knew she couldn't breathe without and she was hurting them. Betraying them by letting her past demons control her and invade their home. She stepped down from the porch, feeling the wet grass on her bare feet and the mist in the night air on her face. _Please Lord, help me be a better wife and mother. I can't hurt my two gifts from you like this,_ Hannah prayed as she slowly walked over to her loves.

Shepard looked up and saw her mother coming around the jeep and she began to cry. "Momma!"

"Shhh, my Whisper," Hannah said more huskily as she fought back tears ... and she kissed her daughter on the forehead, "Everything will be okay, I promise."

Pierce looked at Hannah as she put her hand on his cheek, "I am so sorry, Pierce. You must know that I love you. That you and Elizabeth are the best things in my life. That I can't live without either of you. Please forgive me for those false and unkind words ... please." Pierce grabbed his wife and as they held each other and cried, Shepard took the key to the jeep and left her parents.

* * *

HEY? SO DID YOU CHECK THAT ASARI SITE OUT YET?

HEY?

HELLO?

WHERE THE FRICK ARE YOU?

OK, STOP LOOKING AT THE SITE. OR ARE YOU LOOKING AT KROGANS? HA! HA!

FINE! IGNORE ME. I'LL CHAT WITH YOU TOMORROW ANTI-SOCIAL GIRL! REMEMBER THAT TOMORROW WE LEARN HOW TO PLAY SKYBALL. I STILL DON"T KNOW WHY SINCE THE ASARI OWN THAT GAME.

Shepard saw the messages from Ricky blinking on her screen and shook her head. Never one to share her fears she typed. YOU WERE RIGHT. I WAS LOOKING AT HOT WICKED NAKED ASARI. WHO NEEDS HUMAN MALES WITH BLUE ALIENS WAITING OUT THERE? WHERE CAN I PICK ONE UP? I'M SURE MY PARENTS WOULD LOVE ME BRINGING ONE HOME. NOT! SKYBALL WILL BE OURS ONE DAY! I'LL BEAT THE GOOBERS OUT OF AN ASARI AT THAT GAME ONE DAY! MARK MY WORDS! IT DOESN'T LOOK THAT FRICKEN' HARD!

Shepard turned off her netbook and desk light, turned on her KonStellation Light then pushed her dog over and crawled into bed. Moonie put his head on her legs as she looked at the planets and stars floating above her head. As she faded off she was worrying about her parents as she looked at the asari planet Aethoyner.


	12. The Turian Flywheel Position

"Aethoyner was hot and humid," Liara shared as she stepped into the shower, turning the cold water up. "But it was worth the discomfort. There were walls that simply took my breath away!"

Liara had just arrived back from her latest excavation and needed to start putting her findings together, which included her theory of the cycle of extinction. She had suspected it for the last 15 years as it peeked out and hinted shyly through papers, wall carvings, statues, even in the stars themselves. But the cycle had become solidified in her mind after seeing the wall of Kyuos. All she wanted was to take another look at the data and start putting the pieces together. But first, after 4 months of sheer heaven in prothean ruins, she wanted a shower, fresh Thessian fruit, a soft bed and sleep. Her plans were thrown off a bit when Nicia surprised her at the port. "I thought I would take the day off and we could go to Tsair for sitruuna and then stop at the University. Everyone there wants to see you." _And I want them to see you with me. Me with Matriarch Benezia's daughter. Even as a pureblood, you are still valuable. If that bitch had mated outside our species, how much more valuable you would have been. That selfish bitch!_

When Liara had seen her standing there, waiting for her, she had sighed, _So soon? I wanted time alone. Shower. Meal. Sleep. Studies._ Nicia wouldn't listen when Liara would tell her that she preferred to take a skycab home. She hated to be greeted at ports. She had been this way since her first excavation trip when she was just 51 years old. The Matriarch had been called away and Liara had arrived to a skylimo driver with her name floating above his head. She had thrown a little fit, sent him away and as she headed for the cab station started to calm down. She began to look around, grabbed a cup of Kaffee and a ritual was born that day … She loved standing in the port, collecting her bags, buying a cup of Kaffee from a stand, finding a seat, sipping the hot drink as she watched the people walk by, trying to guess their lives. She always loved a good mystery … and there was nothing as mysterious as people's lives to her. But like a good Matriarch's daughter, when she saw Nicia she just smiled. Emotions checked.

The professor loved the access that Liara T'Soni provided; the open reservation at all the exclusive sitruuna houses, membership to the Serrice Fitness, box seats at the Serrice Delphinus Skyball Stadium and the use of her sporty Amaranth skycar. For most, this would have been enough, but Nicia was greedy and vain. She saw what she could have in the Matriarch's world and wanted more. But that part of the T'Soni world was cut off to her and as she would read about parties thrown by, events attended by and speeches made by the Matriarch her self-important ego would cry out, _I should be there! People should see me there within her circle. Her daughter and I under her approval!_ She had become more frustrated … more demanding. But as the professor's desires and demands were increasing, Liara was feeling overwhelmed. The demands, the accusations, the tears, Liara had spent evenings watching the professor melt down as the Matriarch held yet another exclusive party without an invitation in their possession. Her rage increased when she heard that colleagues were attending, "colleagues, Liara! Both Professor Henell and Professor Tyrian are there right now! Henell and Tyrian! Do you know how foolish that makes me look! The Matriarch is doing this to humiliate me … humiliate you! I demand that you …you must do something! The Matriarch is slapping me in the face! And everyone knows it!" She would scream as Liara tried to calm her.

Now as Liara walked through the port she was secretly praying that there were no T'Soni events at home, _no Liara … the Matriarch's home. It's not your home anymore. When will you realize that? Mother does not want you_. Just barely back on Thessia and the pain of her separation was pulling at her again. At least while she was lost in the past, chipping away stone, reaching into dark places and smelling rot the pain was forgotten. Not being in the grace of her mother, not being in Armali, not being able to slip into her mother's private room and kiss her, hearing her voice as she lectured in the great hall while Liara painted just down the way ... not playing the onai in the ballroom as her mother and her private companion, Kyriake, danced together. Liara missed her bedroom, missed her childhood home … missed her mother. But she tried to push that to the back of her mind.

After twelve years in the bioengineering department at the Serrice University, the various prothean excavation teams that she had been involved with and the historical relics that she uncovered; Liara had been offered the master researcher position at the Thessia Guildhall. She was the youngest person ever offered the post which traditionally was held by a matron and occasionally a Matriarch and it caught her by complete surprise. The day that she had learned of the offer she had just earlier avoided a band of pirates, was covered in mud, her suit torn and bruises on her legs when she had squealed with delight at the offer blinking on her netbook. The post would give her access to manuscripts, artifacts and historical documents not available to the public. Already able to lose a day trying to decipher old Prothean data files, this position was about to open more files that would keep her busy for the next 10 years easy.

* * *

Now after tea and the University, Liara was in her Serrice home that she shared with the professor. It was a closet compared to the home she grew up in and the professor had been hinting that they needed to purchase a bigger place. Liara knew that the funds would come from her account and one thing that the Matriarch had instilled in her daughter … frugality. This restraint was further imbedded as Liara had to learn to be resourceful on digs with items already in her possession. Waste in her life was unacceptable. Everything had purpose and could be re-used as needed. When the Matriarch had cut her out, she had not touched the accounts already open to her daughter. Her daughter was more frugal than her mother and the Matriarch smiled knowing that the professor would reach a wall there as well … and not by her hand … At least not directly.

"Shall I wash your back?"

"If you want to," Liara answered as Nicia slipped into the shower. The water was colder than Nicia liked and as she reached past Liara to adjust the temperature, she shook her head no and blocked her off.

"Liara! If I'm going to wash your back, I need the water warmer." Liara looked at Nicia, handed her the tube of soap and turned her back to her. "Liara, you are spoiled!"

"Wash," Liara instructed.

As Nicia soaped up her back, shivering, she asked, "So, have you decided yet?"

"I have accepted the master researcher position," Liara answered as she lathered up her stomach and between her legs. "Can you just image what I will find? And it will open doors to further research. The Matriarch Eyto is there and she has a method of learning new languages that decrease the time that it takes ... as well as an exercise that helps improve your retention of data. I must contact her!"

Liara continued talking about the Matriarch Eyto, about the languages that she thought necessary to further her research … Nicia smiled lost in her own thoughts. Thessia Guildhall, was the prestigious center for asari learning and research. _See bitch, with me your daughter is successful. You will have to accept me soon. Accept me and give me access to your world! I deserve it! _That had been Nicia's goal since she first saw Liara in her class … access to the Matriarch's Corallium Circle of wealth, power, knowledge, prestige and respect. She foolishly thought that once she had Liara in her arms that the Matriarch would have to accept her. But since that fateful night three years ago, the Matriarch had refused to allow the professor in her presence. Nicia tried using Liara in gaining access and when her demands had left Liara crying and morose ... this resulted in the Matriarch cutting off access to her own daughter.

* * *

The day that Liara had moved, she carried the last of the items that she was taking to her skycar, looked up at her home, their home, hoping to see her mother, to have her mother stop her from leaving … instead the Matriarch was nowhere to be seen and so Liara drove away in tears. All she wanted was her mother to tell her no, send her to her room, to not let her leave. But the Matriarch had stayed in the reading room with the door closed, a deathly silence beyond. She had sat on the terrace knowing that she was letting her daughter leave … her very heart was breaking as tears rolled down her face. _Please Goddess Athame, protect my daughter_.

Benezia had given instructions earlier that day to her acolytes that Liara could take anything that she wanted ... anything. But after that day "she is no longer welcome with an open invitation to my home." The acolytes left and a few found private spots to cry. Shiala had gone into Little's room after helping her pack and watching the T'Soni door closed behind Liara, picked up the prothean jewelry and sat on the bed. She could see that a few items were gone but so much had been left. "Oh, Little, please be safe."

For over three years the Matriarch had stepped away from her daughter. It had been hard on her, shutting her daughter out, as though she had shut her own heart down. But as long as she was seeing the professor, the Matriarch was ensuring that there was no entry into her inner circle. No encouragement. As long as her approval was not given Liara would not move further into the union … or at least the Matriarch hoped. She had guided her and oh so carefully raised her to be a sensible and careful maiden. She had breathed a sigh of relief when Liara did not show an interest in some of the more traditional paths that other maidens had followed. She had no worries that her daughter would run off to join the Eclipse, run off to another world to bed whatever moved or bare her body for chits and giggles. She knew that part of Liara turning out more grounded was just as much the cloth of Liara as it was her guidance. Turning away from her daughter had been hard but the Matriarch had done this before in her life … cutting someone out, but it was hurting her beyond words this time. This time she did not want this separation to be permanent. She now waited to see if her daughter would fall under the control of the professor or if she would show that she was, indeed, a true T'Soni.

Liara had wanted to stop seeing the professor but after that night three years ago, she had set her own trap. Now that others had seen her publicly display a lover's touch, if she stopped seeing Nicia, people would think her open to invitation. If someone of importance advanced and she declined the offer it could, though not always, show her as shortsighted and that would fall back to the Matriarch. People would say that the Matriarch did not train her or guide her as was the expected standard. Liara did not want that blemish on the Matriarch. _It is better this way_, Liara thought.

* * *

The cold water felt good against Liara's skin. She placed her head under the shower of ice cold water and thought of the wall of Kyuos. The colors were so beautiful. Beautiful shades of red, orange and yellow. She had seen those colors before. But where? She had stood mesmerized looking at the wall and it had felt so familiar. Her thoughts were interrupted as her lover called her name.

"Liara! The Matriarch," Nicia spit out. "She never invited me once to her home for one of her social events. Not once! Even when I went to see her at the estate-"

"The Matriarch invited you to our … her home?" Liara turned around to face Nicia.

"No, I thought-"

"You just showed up without an invitation?" Liara sounded panicked.

"I'm seeing you, her daughter! Isn't that enough? I should have the right to call upon her!" Nicia was getting angrier, "She was at the Politia Villa and how would it look if your erotas did not welcome her to Serrice. I was doing it for you! That is how much I care about you!"

Liara turned around and placed her face under the water knowing that the reason given by Nicia was a ruse to just show up at one of the Matriarch's residences. After all, the Matriarch was occasionally coming to Serrice for events, lectures, parties. _Oh, Goddess! What must mother think! Okay, Liara. Be calm. This is not your fault. Nicia knows that she is not to go to my … I mean mother's home … Mother forbid it. Even if she were not unwelcomed, no one shows up to a Matriarch's home uninvited. No one! What if mother think's I … Ohhhh. Relax! Breathe! Everything will be okay. Okay. _

"Liara," Nicia sighed as she turned her around, "maybe the Matriarch would open her homes if you demanded it? You should just go there and make her accept me … us! It's been three years … You are her daughter ... her only daughter!"

Liara looked into her eyes, "Please. Everything must happen in its own time. I cannot see the Matriarch without her invitation. We cannot rush anything. Not the Matriarch accepting you ... Oh, Goddess, not the Matriarch accepting us."

Nicia put her hands on Liara's hips, "You should really defend me. You should want her to open her home to me … to us! She must be hurting. You could use-" Liara turned around trying to end the discussion. Nicia shifted gears, "I missed you these last 4 months and having your mother accept me and allow me to be in your home … it is _your_ home, Liara, and I was thinking ... We could move in with her if you really wanted. It would make me feel close to you when you are gone on one of your expeditions. The Politia Villa is beautiful and rarely used ... Politia!" Oh, if only she could live in that very exclusive part of Serrice.

Liara could feel the panic rising in her. _Breathe. Just breathe_. "Please Nicia. I do not want to discuss this right now. I need time … time to…" Liara raised her hand to her forehead.

Nicia brought her hand down, "Maybe if we took our relationship farther. Deeper. Can't you see that you are old enough now?"

_Oh, Goddess, she is not going to start again. Please no. I'm tired._

"I can make you feel pleasures if you would just open your mind. If you would just trust me and let me show you how much more intense, more …"

_Please ... not the M word._

Liara was exhausted from the trip home to Thessia and the last thing that she wanted to talk about was melding. Liara had remembered how Shiala had said that you left a piece of you in the other person and they in you … Those words put a brake on her ever melding with Nicia. She still was physically attracted to the professor, loved her mind when they discussed history, arts … but she also saw the coldness, the selfishness, the deceit. Not to say that Liara wasn't curious or not wanting to feel what it was like to meld. She had heard how spiritual, sensual, erotic and burning it could be. The thought of pushing herself inside another with her mind was what she sometimes thought of as she pleasured herself. Bringing someone to the heights of sexual release and having them under her spell. She blushed at the thought. She had even researched the proper way for mating as well as the many variations and heightened stages of melding. She found it all fascinating but very intimidating. She was very curious about the act, but she had quickly realized, once she lived with Nicia, that it would not happen with her. No. She had yet to meet the person that she would want to please that way. Seduce that way. Touch that way.

For now, she was content with learning and improving physical pleasures. That was enough. But that was not enough for the matron, "I'm not ready." Liara cut her off as she moved closer. "So can't this be enough … for now?" Liara kissed her on the lips as she pressed her body against the wall … Nicia caught her breath as her young lover placed her thumb at a pleasure point that she had not experienced before, pressed and smiled. Nicia let out a moan as Liara pressed even more. Yes, Liara was a quick study and had quickly passed the professor in the art of physical pleasures. She was now teaching her as she would try new things that she had read about.

"You don't fool me," Nicia said panting as Liara touched her again. The professor found her legs going weak as Liara pressed her in another area. The professor had started to breath in short gasps … _Hmmm_, Liara thought. _Not_ _what I expected. What if I …_ she started to move her thumb in hard circles and Nicia cried out, legs shaking. _Interesting. Just a little more pressure_. Nicia fell to the floor of the shower as Liara took a mental note of the response, turned off the water and asked her lover if she was okay.

"I think we need to do this in bed," Nicia panted.

Liara smiled, helped her shaken lover up and pulled her to their bedroom. She had just studied ancient sexual positions of the turian race as a direct result of wondering if mixing asari touches with other alien positions could heighten pleasures. Looking at her shaken lover from just her initial test excited her. She suddenly had energy. "I did think of you while I was away ... Let me show you."

Hours later as they lay together in bed, Nicia unable to feel her legs, looked at her, "I am going to one day have you entwined with me. I will be your first."

Liara turned to face her and just smiled. _Your voice is slightly higher. Is that due to the turian flywheel position? Must be. _

"Surely you can see that there will never be anyone who measures up to me? Do you know how many others would gladly let me be their first?" Nicia tried to turn on her side, but her hips felt heavy and still … no legs.

"Too many to count, I'm sure." Liara answered turning her back to Nicia and smiling. What Nicia said was not an empty boast and Liara knew it. The Professor had her pick both on and off the campus of the University of Serrice and she did pick on occasion. Liara knew that the professor had many lovers despite her words of wanting a single commitment. Typically asari would have various lovers until they were melding out of deep affection and very rarely while still in their first stage of their life. So while Nicia professed her absolute devotion, Liara was grateful that there were others satisfying her hungers. Liara had in fact smiled at the thought of the others because earlier as Nicia's back had arched and a small cry escape her lips, Liara had thought, _hopefully, this will hold you for a few weeks … I have so much to do. So much to read … to research. Maybe one of your lovers can keep you busy_.

Liara herself had not taken another lover because she was not given to that type of frivolity. She would prefer to spend her time studying, researching, and learning than climbing in and out of beds. Besides, Nicia was a willing subject matter when Liara was curious about a sexual position, touch, taste, sound. If you had told Liara that it was a little cold to perform sex as a test, the scientist in her would have looked at you confused. She loved to research and experiment. She couldn't wait for the day that she had a lover that she could take that next deep step with. There was so much in the next step of asari sexuality that she wanted to experience. For now all she could do was study, make notes, dream and wait.

As her weakened and paralyzed lover fell asleep, Liara quietly got out of bed and went to her netpad bag. A few minutes later found her sitting at the dining table, sitruuna in hand, netpad open, map of the Artemis Tau cluster. She turned on music and as the piece filled the room, Liara was enchanted. She had never heard the piece before and thought how wonderful. She listened as Bagatelle No. 25 in A minor was finished and thought, "I wished that I knew how to play that on the Onai."


	13. As Ari Ass

"Well, I can show you," Shepard said as she pulled Ricky to the piano.

"Cool!" Ricky said as he sat down. He had heard Shepard practicing Fur Elise and thought it sounded okay.

So Shepard began showing her friend how to play it, mimicking her mother, "Back straight! Hands like …."

Hannah was out in the garden and Pierce was washing Hannah's Ford Xtrec in the driveway as Moonie ran around the car barking at the hose spraying water. After the dark event just a week prior the house had calmed down, but Shepard could see her parents carefully moving around each other. She wished that she could fix whatever was wrong but she didn't know how. For now all she could do was try and be a good daughter and not cause any problems.

"Elizabeth Whisper! Come get this dog out of my garden!" Moonie had raced from Pierce to dancing around Hannah.

Shepard looked at Ricky, "Oh, Bacchus!" The two ran out the back door just as Moonie ran through the lettuce. "Moonie! Moonie! Come on boy!" The dog seeing Shepard got excited and backed up into the lettuce patch and began running around in a circle. Hannah screamed as her lettuce was being trampled under the dog as Shepard and her friend tried to grab him. Moonie, wanting to play, ran off down the street with the two kids chasing after him.

As Hannah assessed the damage, Pierce came around the house in khaki shorts, sandals and a Savannah Sand Gnats baseball cap placed backwards on his head. "How much damage did Moonie do?"

Hannah looked up with frustration, "Oh, Pierce! That dog is out to test my patience!"

"Do you want me to tell B that this dog is just too much trouble and is upsetting the household?" He asked, "Maybe she'll take the dog back."

Hannah thinking about how it would hurt both the Sheriff and her daughter shook her head, "Please don't. We'll just have to keep the garden closed, just like when Elizabeth was little."

Both remembered the time that their little girl at 6 years old had gotten into the garden and took bites out of all the ripe tomatoes. Hannah had been so upset that she had Pierce get their daughter as she wandered off to the bank to calm down.

"The tomatoes that year were really good." Pierce teased, causing his wife to smile at the memory. "You couldn't really blame the kid."

"Oh, yes I could!" Hannah laughed. "She was lucky that you were home sick that day or she probably wouldn't have made it to seven." They both couldn't help but laugh as she went back to fixing the damaged garden.

"Well, someone has to save the kid from herself," Pierce finally smiled as Hannah could still be heard laughing as she bent over. Pierce looked at his wife's behind and rubbed the back of his neck. At forty-seven she still had a beautiful backside ... it was not as small but the curves were even better in his book. But thinking of asses ... "Uh, Hannah?"

Hannah turned to look back at him, pulling her gardening hat up so she could see, "Yes?"

"About tonight … uh, do we really need … well, do we really need to …"

"Yes." Hannah said as she slowly got back up and wiped her hands on her gardening apron.

"Couldn't you just do it? Do you really need me?"

Hannah looked at her husband as she walked over and picked up her glass of ice tea, "Pierce, do you want me to take care of this without you?"

Pierce looked out at the river Potamoi that butted up to their backyard. He had always meant to build a dock and get a boat, but other things took his attention. "Well, I was thinking that I really needed to start building that dock."

"Dock?" Hannah asked confused as she looked at the river, "Pierce, you're afraid of that water! You won't even stand on the bank to fish there. You go to the lake over at the Sheriff's place. So, instead of telling me some fib, just tell me that you want to leave this to me."

"Hannah, there are things in that river that …" Pierce thought of the creature that looked like a seahorse but the size of a man and with teeth. With TEETH! What is the purpose of a creature like that if not to take a man's leg? Pierce didn't care if they were docile fish … water horse … whatever … they had BIG TEETH! After seeing one of those things … hell, no more swimming for him! Not in that river, at least. His wife and daughter though never hesitated to jump right back in. _Senseless women_, he had thought to himself. "I'm not afraid of that water! I'm afraid of the big teeth in that water!"

Hannah laughed as she lifted her glass to his lips to drink. As he drank she looked at his profile. He was always attractive to her and she had loved his mischievous charm and those lips, but that desire always scared her. Her past pulling at her creeped against her natural desire for him. As he pulled away, he caught her odd look, "Pierce, if you aren't comfortable, admit it and I'll do it alone."

"I just think that you, as the mother … well, she is a girl."

"Very observant, husband ... Yes, I gave you a daughter." Pierce laughed as Hannah shook her head.

"Okay, we will do this together." He said in defeat. "After dinner?"

Hannah agreed and went into the house.

* * *

Just the day before, Hannah had been picking up Shepard's dirty laundry in her room when she saw her daughter's netbook open and still on. When Hannah went to turn it off the screen came to life and there was a naked asari on the "As Ari Ass" page. She was bent over, ass facing the screen and smiling. Not knowing what to do, she decided to talk to Pierce later that evening. As they sat on the front porch after dinner she had shared what she had seen, "Do you think that she's developed a … fetish?"

Pierce had choked on his sweet tea; he didn't even know that his wife knew that word, "Fetish?" She looked at him, unblinking. "What, to blue things? Crap, my guitar strap is blue, should I hide it?"

Hannah slapped him on the arm, "Don't make fun! This is serious."

"Preacher woman, she is too young for a fetish." _I think. I hope_.

Hannah looked at him, her brow furrowed, "We have to talk to her," she said as their daughter practiced the piano in the living room.

"We?" Now here it was, and he would have shaved off a nipple to keep from talking to his daughter about s.e.x. "Hannah? Do we really have to? She's only 13 years old ... A kid for Bacchus' sake."

Hannah took a drink of his tea and squished her face, "How do you drink your tea so sweet?"

"If you don't like it," he laughed and grabbed it back. "I think asari find it to be an aphrodisiac!"

Hannah laughed and punched him in the arm, "Well, don't tell our 13-year-old daughter."

* * *

Now was the moment of truth with Pierce roped in by Hannah to participate in this "talk" … Shepard had just finished washing the dishes in the kitchen when Hannah called her daughter into the living room. Pierce was sitting in his chair looking green while Hannah was sitting on the couch. Shepard stood in front of the coffee table as she dried her hands on the kitchen towel, "Yes ma'am?"

Hannah looked at her husband who was looking up at the ceiling, "Baby, your father and I wanted to talk to you about …" she looked again at her husband, who was now picking at his pants. _My wonderful support system, you are_. "… well, you are 13 years old, now."

Shepard stood there looking at her mom, confused. "Is there something wrong?" Her heart began to race. _Please don't be breaking up. Please_.

Hannah shifted, "Well, at 13 you are getting bigger. You are growing up and things-"

Shepard thinking that her parents thought at her age they could break up stopped her, "Grown up? No … I'm still a kid. I'm not grown up. Not even close. I still get afraid of the dark."

Pierce and Hannah looked at each other confused. "Elizabeth!" Hannah said, "You have never been afraid of the dark! Even when you were a baby."

"But I could be." Shepard stumbled, "I'm just sayin' … I'm a kid. So I don't … I shouldn't hear adult things. That's all I'm sayin' … see?"

"I agree, just a kid. Okay, that's settled. Hannah, can we go?" Pierce leaned over as he went to run.

"Pierce stay seated and Elizabeth stay standing!" Hannah shook her head. _Two peas in a pod_, she thought and smiled. _See maman, she is a Shepard, not a Levasseur_! "Elizabeth, have you heard of a species called asari?"

Shepard sighed; _please don't make me talk about those things. Every boy talks about them_. "Yes, mama … They're blue." _Please don't make me say more_.

"How do you feel about them?" Both Shepard and Pierce shifted uncomfortable with the topic.

"They're blue, momma. What should I feel about them?"

Hannah looked at her daughter trying to see if she was being dishonest, "Do you like them?"

Shepard saw her mother trying to read her, and she began to think that these were trick questions, "I don't really know them … why? Do you like them?"

Pierce gave a slight laugh and Hannah raised a brow at him, "Shepard, I found your netbook on that site."

Shepard was now really confused, "Site? Momma I don't know what you are talking about. What site?"

Hannah looked at her husband for help and he cleared his throat, "You know … the" and he mouthed the words, As Ari Ass.

Shepard shook her head, "Daddy?"

Pierce mumbled, "As Ari Ass." Shepard and Hannah still looking at him … Hannah unimpressed and Shepard still confused. Frustrated and feeling a little scolded by his wife's stare he almost shouted, "The site As Ari Ass!"

_As Ari Ass?_ Shepard was only momentarily confused and then she started laughing. They weren't about to tell her that they were breaking up, that their home would never be the same ... Instead they were talking about the blue chicks that she couldn't care less about and a site that she had not visited. Pure relief resulted in her laughing harder than she normally would have, "You thought that I was looking at that site?"

Both her parents just looked at her as she continued to laugh. "Well if you weren't who was? Moonie?" Hannah asked.

"Moonie? That's a good one momma!" Shepard was so relieved and happy that she continued to laugh and talk like she was with her friends and not her parents, or her mother to be specific. "It was Ricky … He has a fetish for them." Hannah and Pierce looked at each as their daughter continued, "They'll sleep with anything … and I mean anything! So Ricky figures he has a chance with them, since no human girl would touch him. I tell him that he'll have blue babies but he doesn't care. But hey, they might as well match his blue balls … oh, sorry momma. Not that I think he could have babies with them since they aren't like us. I mean … well they do have breasts and a va-"

Pierce rose from his chair, "Well, I'm glad that we straightened that out. I gotta go check on something in the garage."

Hannah just sat looking at her daughter, mouth open but relieved.

* * *

"She said fetish in front of the pastor?" Stu asked and howled.

Pierce joined in, "And blue balls!"

"Oh, bejesus! And what was this site called?"

Pierce, leaning against the butcher's counter, whispered, "As Ari Ass."

Stu laughed even harder, "That is funny! As Ari Ass! Whoot boy!" Pierce just looked at him, "Come on man … As Ari Ass … Asari Ass … A sorry ass!"

Pierce placed his cap over Stu's face as a few female patrons came closer to the butcher's case, "Shh! You have customers!"

Pierce had stopped at Rurik's Grocers to pick up Stu on his way to O'Hara's Pub. Stu Aasen was a hardworking man that had come to Mindoir with his wife and son to try and have a better life. His wife had decided to take their ten-year-old son and visit her family back on Earth. After a month visit they had went to return home when their shuttle disappeared. The last communication received by the pilot was that the shuttle had come under a batarian attack. Stu did not know if they had died in the raid or if, he didn't go there. He would have left, but he was afraid that if he left and they came back, came looking for him. No, he had to stay. It had been 6 years but his son's room, his wife's chair, her kitchen, their home was the same. The same as he waited.

As Stu jumped into Pierce's jeep he looked over at his friend. The man that had spent nights with him when his family first disappeared, drank with him, cried with him, cooked for him … hell, Pierce had put his life on hold as he became the grieving man's roommate. Even now, if he had a rough night, he could call his buddy and Pierce would be there. That is why he was struggling. "Pierce, can you hold up."

Pierce had just started the jeep and he looked over at his friend. "What?"

"Can you cut the engine for a minute? I need to talk to you."

Pierce shut his jeep off and turned to look at his friend, "What's wrong?"

"You know that I love you, the pastor and Eli, right?"

"We love you too, Stu." Pierce could see that something was gnawing at his friend.

"Sometimes, I get lonely. And I ain't proud of it, but sometimes I go down to the Shop." Pierce started to feel sick, "If Milly were still here … I wouldn't have gone there … but ... well, I could see how some men might also go down there. Some men ... but then the-"

"Stu," Pierce stopped him, "Just cut to the chase."

"I don't know what's going on in your marriage, hell no one knows what's going on in marriages except the two in it … but I would hate to see you lose what you got. Take it from a man who lost everything … there ain't an emptiness like a house missing the love in it."

Pierce looked down at his legs, "Anyone else see me there?"

"Not that I know. But if it ever got out, the things that they would say about the pastor-"

"This ain't about Hannah. That was my action, my failing." Pierce said a little angrier then he felt. "No one can put that on my wife!"

"Pierce," Stu put his hand on his friend's shoulder and looked him in straight in the eye, "They wouldn't give a damn about you … but they would use it against the pastor. You gotta know that. You have really put her reputation at risk. What would her congregation think … shit what would the community think to find out that her husband is visiting the whores? The same whores that she didn't protest! Now we see why. And how did her husband pay for these trips? The collection plate, maybe? Then she must have some kind of open-marriage wi-"

Pierce was feeling sicker as he saw the truth in what Stu was saying, "Okay Stu! I get it!"

"What were you thinking? I always thought you were a smart guy with his head on straight. When I saw you there, hell man … I don't get it."

_I wasn't thinking. I was hurt. Empty._ He thought as he sat there looking down Main Street. Hannah had been cold, pushing him away and he had always tried to be understanding. But living with a woman that could drive you crazy just doing laundry and then be expected to not have sex. Cold showers, hand jobs … hell, it got to where he would touch her as she slept. He would feel her curves ... curves that had just gotten shapelier with age, press against her softness and then hop up and jump in the shower. Then the anger came and he thought _I work my ass off and for what? For a woman that won't touch me?_ He had only gone once. After he left the Knocking Shop and was halfway home, he had pulled over and cried. He had cried knowing that he had defiled his marriage. That night he had found it almost impossible to look at both his wife and daughter. He had wanted to confess to his wife and beg for forgiveness ... his guilt gnawing at him. But then he remembered what his dad had once told him, "If you should stray ... don't ever tell your wife. Don't take your shitty feelings and give them to her just so you feel better. It's your guilt and your burden ... not hers."

He had never gone back to the Shop but he started spending time after work sitting in his jeep and watching the river a few blocks from his house. _You don't deserve them_, he had bitterly thought. Others would have told him that men cheat … but he would have bitterly spit in that person's face. No. His father had always impressed honor, truth, loyalty and commitment on him. That was what he was trying to impress on his daughter, although he thought that his wife was better at guiding her character. Maybe that is partly why he had always run from relationships. He felt that he wouldn't be good enough to deserve what his father had. But Hannah was like a diamond in a mud pit ... he might look at an occasional woman but he'd never seen a woman that compared to her physically or emotionally.

Jack Shepard had told his son that a real man controls his desires and honors his wife … honors his home. "Son, when you marry this woman," his father had said on his wedding day to Hannah, "you are giving your word of honor to her and your future children that they are your life. That everything that you do is with them in mind. So if you don't think that you can be faithful in ALL things then you need to stop this right here."

"Pop," Pierce had asked his dad in response, "You never cheated on mom? You never saw another woman that made you want her? All these years and you never strayed?"

"Stray on Elizabeth?" Jack stopped, "Son, I never met a woman worth the risk of losing Bethie or you kids. That's what you gotta think every time your rod tries to pull you to foreign ground. Is this worth what I have? Besides, Bethie would kill me."

Pop was right as usual. Nothing was worth losing Hannah or his kid over. Nothing.

Once while sitting in his jeep, he saw his kid and three of her buddies riding their bikes out in the field. They had built ramps and he watched as his daughter flew farther, higher and took the biggest risks. Once he saw her take flight, then land bike over daughter … but before he had a chance to worry, she got up with blood on her lip and was laughing. Ricky, Tyler and Freddy were all whooping around her and he caught one of the boys yell "crazy ass jump, Shepard!" Pierce grinned as his and Hannah's kid dared herself to take bigger risks that day and he thought, "She is so much of her mother. Nothing scares her." Then off in the distance he saw one of those horse fish with teeth and jumped.

Eli had seen her dad, yelled at him, grinned with blood on her chin and waved!


	14. The Storyteller

They continued waving at each other until they were face to face and giggling at their own silliness. Liara had not only been away from Armali in over three years but she had not seen any of her family or her mother's acolytes since the dismissal. Those in the inner circle of the Matriarch disappeared from Liara's life with only two exceptions ... The Matriarch Livia, her mother's Theia, and her cousin Sibila. While the Matriarch could publicly see her since she was an elder and of higher importance then Benezia ... her cousin had to be more careful. They had sent messages back and forth but they had not seen each other because that would have been taken as a public slap against the Matriarch. Now three years later, the Matriarch Livia had instructed Liara to greet Sibila at the Serrice Port. Liara had cried when she received the directive and now the two cousins were embracing and kissing.

"I was so worried that you wouldn't show up," Sibila kissed her cousin again on the cheek.

"The Matriarch Livia ... she requested it," Liara said in all seriousness. "I could not disobey her."

"Of course not," Sibila laughed. "But I meant, that with you being such an esteemed master researcher now! Impressive! I would think that you would be too busy researching a master."

"Oh, Siby!" Liara smiled, pushing her cousin. "It was such an honor to be chosen though. I still can't believe that they picked me ... But let us look at you. You are so lovely ... I have … I …" Liara began to tear up.

Sibila hugged her cousin and tried to quiet her fears. "I am so glad to be in your presence as well. You are my second light in life ... second only to mother. I do wish that you would come to Illium ... we could have so much entertainment together!"

"Leave Thessia? Armali? Mother?" Liara pulled away, wiping her eyes, "No. I can never see me leaving home."

"Oh, Li-Li!" Sibila shook her head, "You should leave home at least once!"

"I lived on Lusia for seven years!" Liara defended herself.

"Oh, but that was still under the watchful eye of the Matriarch," Sibila countered. "This would be freedom!"

"I have freedom!" Liara pouted.

Sibila laughed as she put her arm through Liara's, "But I miss you! Life is rather dull without you."

"But I heard that you are now managing the sales department at Oneiroi," Liara squeezed her arm, "I am so proud for you, Siby! Manager!"

"Oh please, if you had accepted that researcher's position at Oneiroi and left with me three years ago, you would be head of the R&D department by now!" The two girls laughed and hugged again. Sibila then pushed her cousin back, holding her at arm's length, "Let me look at you, Li-Li!" Sibila could see that her cousin looked tired and she shook her head, "Aren't you taking care of yourself? How much sleep are you getting?" _Isn't the professor making sure that you get rest?_

Liara giggled, "Still worrying about me?"

"Of course! I know how the brilliant Dr. T'Soni can forget to eat, sleep and drink when she has her head in papers, papers and papers!"

"My work at the Thessia Guildhall has been demanding but … oh, Siby! There are documents there that have shed more light on the pro-"

"Please don't say protheans! My fingers seem to tingle now every time I hear that word." Sibila held up her hands and wiggled her fingers, "I'm begging you!"

Liara raised an eyebrow, put her hand on her hip and smirked, "You shouldn't have put your hands in it."

"Uh, right back at you!" Sibila smiled.

"What?" Liara had never heard that phrase before.

"Oh, that's what humans say."

"Humans? Have you seen one?"

Sibila stood a little taller, "Plenty. In fact …" Sibila looked around conspiratorially, "I'm seeing one right now. Well, not right now, I'm with you but back on Illium."

"What does there …" Liara waved her fingers around the top of her head. "… feel like?"

"Hair?" Liara nodded, "Well, it can be all kinds of texture. Tustin, that's his name, has what they call kinky hair. It feels like …"

"You really are seeing a human?" Liara's eyes got big. "A male even?"

"For the last two months. He thinks physical pleasure means that we are an item ... an exclusive item. As in, we only see each other. So sweet! I don't have the heart to tell him that it just means that we are having physical pleasure together. I'll let him go when I get back though. A physical pleasure with humans is not as good as with turians. The humans have to shoot liquid in you and I'm not a deposit box. At least the turians can keep it to themselves, that self-control of theirs is just amazing! But the humans are just too quick and aggressive for my tastes. Speaking of tastes, they also like you to swallow!" Sibila grimaced.

"Swallow?" Liara stood in the middle of the port looking at her cousin confused. Humans can't control what they do in bed? She thought of Moon Unit Zappa shooting some kind of liquid in her mouth and shuddered. _I_ _will never touch a human! Not even if I live a million years!_

"I'm sorry, I'm rambling!" Sibila smiled as she put her arm through her cousin's arm and they began to stroll, "Let's go to Tsair today and share sitruuna! I've missed you. Then afterwards we can go shopping for my 100th birthday celebration. You and I need to find the appropriate wear. Although, I hear that you are known for going with just jewelry as of late? So daring of you, when did you become an asari?"

Liara stopped, "I won't be attending."

Sibila looked at her cousin, "What? Yes you are. Mother sent you an invitation and you are to be my monium, you have to be there!"

Liara saw a bench and sat down, holding her stomach, "Mother will be there. I have been … her open invitation was withdrawn from me. I cannot attend."

Sibila sat next to Liara and placed her arm over her back. "If mother sent you an invitation then Theia ... the Matriarch, approved your presence."

Liara began to tear up again, "No Siby. I hurt her. I really made a mess of … Oh, Siby!"

Sibila held her cousin, "You know that mother would never just invite anyone without the Matriarch's approval. Never! That would be as silly as me inviting someone that you do not want to see. Never! So see … Theia must have approved."

Liara grabbed her cousin tighter, "No, mother has forgotten me. She has stopped wanting me ... She no longer finds me worthy of her grace. She didn't approve the invitation I know it."

Sibila gently turned her cousin's face to look her in the eyes, "Li-Li, I promise you … The Matriarch approved your invitation. I really promise!" _Oh, Goddess, please let mother be successful today with Theia._

* * *

"Sister, your daughter will be there." Tatiaria informed her much older sister.

"Then I withdraw my presence from you on that night." Benezia responded. The two sisters were on the terrace of the reading room and Benezia was sitting on the bench that looked out over her daughter's old suite while three acolytes were reading inside.

"I do not accept your rejection of the invitation!" Tatiaria challenged. "This is Sibila's 100th birthday and she has chosen your daughter as her monium. Her monium, sister! Would you deny your daughter that honor?"

_I would deny her nothing if I thought that she would gain strength or wisdom from it_. Benezia thought as she looked at her daughter's old terrace. She sighed, "Tati, I will not attend. Liara will receive no assistance or approval by me or from me while she is with that creature. I cannot. I will not attend."

"I see." Tatiaria walked over to the terrace rail and tilted her head slightly back, "The breeze is quite agreeable this evening."

Benezia looked at her sister suspiciously. Tatiaria was not known for just letting things go. The sudden shift made Benezia cautious. "A little warmer than I and Little …"

As Benezia choked off her words, Tatiaria smiled. _Yes, sister. This might work. You might be ready to at least allow her in your presence_. Benezia's sister knew that she had to be delicate in this matter, but she was not known for having a light touch like her elder sister. "Why don't you join me?" Benezia stood and walked over and stood next to her sister and took in the breeze with her. "I heard a very interesting story just recently." Tatiaria said, still leaning back with her eyes closed.

Benezia mirroring her sister, the warm breeze brushing their faces, took two deep breaths then asked "What story is that sister?"

"There was this maiden and she was nominated to a post at a very prestigious place that once held the Matriarch Dilinaga's writings."

"Careful, sister." The Matriarch said as she remained, eyes closed and head tilted back.

"Always, sister." Tatiaria said. _Oh, Goddess. Am I doing this right? If I fail, my sister and her daughter will still be apart on that night. I must walk lightly_. "Shall I proceed?"

"With caution." Benezia warned. _You must do this with precision, with care or I will not be able to see her. Do not be clumsy, sister._

Tatiaria peeked over at her sister then went back to enjoying the breeze, "Where was I?"

"On a ledge," Benezia answered.

"How exciting," She took a breath and then "Oh, yes. This maiden was nominated to a post at Thessia Guildhall and it seems that any post has to be approved by a shadow board. Now, this shadow board's members are kept a secret. Don't you just love that word ... secret? Why not just call it ... oh, things that will eventually come out?" Benezia shifted and her sister touched her arm, "Please sister. Stay. Enjoy the breeze."

"The breeze I'm enjoying ... Your story? Not so much ... it is tiresome. Does it end soon?"

"Why sister, one should never rush a story. It could lose its intrigue, its mystery, its -"

"Its audience if you don't finish it soon."

"Oh, you have such wit, sister."

"And you have very little of my time left, sister." Benezia looked at her and Tatiaria opened one eye, pushed her sister's face back in the correct position and re-adjusted herself.

"This board has a very influential Matriarch that would have had to give her approval for this lovely maiden's offer. In fact, this very same Matriarch, who I hear is quite unattractive with a bitter disposition," Benezia opened one eye and looked over towards her sister, "well, she is in the process of having an expedition of the Artemis Tau cluster set in motion and who do you think is on that list?"

Benezia shifted and made a sound that expressed impatience. "Go on."

"Well?"

"Well, what?"

"Can you guess?"

"No. Can you finish this story soon?"

"You are no fun, sister. Where was I?"

"Still on a ledge."

Tatiaria frowned in response and then continued ..."Oh, yes … That expedition is also set to begin just as this maiden's position will end at the Guildhall." As Benezia was about to respond, her sister continued, "Don't you just love sharing? And happy endings?"

"What was the purpose of that story?" Benezia asked as she opened her eyes briefly to look at her daughter's suite.

"I would love to see this pretty maiden's face when she learns that this very unattractive and bitter Matriarch assisted her in her current position and is planning on giving her a 10 year project studying protheans!"

Benezia turned to leave, "What time?"

Tatiaria, without moving from her place of enjoyment, answered, "The usual … Bring the thopevo. You always seem to find the best stock."

Benezia couldn't help but smile and return next to her younger sister. After another twenty minutes of enjoying the breeze in deep reflection together, Benezia gave a quick laugh, "Cleverly played, sister."

Tatiaria gave her older sister a kiss on the cheek, "I learned from the best, sister."

* * *

Sibila had her driver drop Liara at her home after they had spent the evening together shopping and having dinner at Dysesthes. Liara had been too embarrassed to have her cousin see the small two bedroom home that she shared with the Professor. She was also afraid that Nicia might come home early and the thought of those two in the same room spelled disaster.

"Oh, Li-Li ... I wish that you could come stay with me at mother's in Armali while I am here!" Siby pouted.

"I, too … but I have my work and my studies here." _And Nicia would make me pay; she would have a … a … Oh, mother. Do you really want to see me?_

"Of course, I don't mean to be so selfish," Sibila hugged her cousin again. "Get some rest! I can't have a tired looking monium! That would be embarrassing!" Sibila then, impersonating her own mother added, "And that my dearest would be very unbecoming of the T'Soni name!"

Both girls laughed and Liara brushed her cheek against her best friend's, "Blessings cousin. May you rest well tonight."

"You too, dearest." Sibila jumped back in the skylimo, waved at her cousin then motioned the driver on.

The apartment was dark when Liara opened the door and she gave a sigh of relief. _Thank the Goddess_! She was alone and so she kicked off her sandals, picked them up and carried them to the master bedroom. She dropped them in a corner, pulled off her dress and padded through the apartment to the guest washroom where she turned the cold water on in the shower. She didn't like sharing her washroom so she had claimed the smaller one instead of the master bath. She had given that to Nicia in exchange for privacy when she was in the tub. She removed a gold bracelet from her wrist and laid it on the counter and then turned on the cold water with just a dash of hot. As she listened to the shower, she looked at her reflection and leaned against the counter, _Would Theia invite me without mother's approval? No, mother would have had to approve. Does mother want to see me_?_ Stop Liara! Don't be a silly girl. You hurt her. You disappointed her and now you must … you must. Mother. Please. Please accept my presence. Please let me stand in your grace once again. Please let me come home. _Liara felt the tears trying to escape and she shook her head, fanned her eyes with her hands, took a deep breath and stepped into the shower.

The shower, the cold water felt good against Liara's skin. She had communed with the water for over an hour, catching herself smiling and humming that pretty little human music that she had heard just recently. Odd that such a silly species could produce something so pretty, she had thought. Now that she was padding her body down, she turned on Akdhat's piece 'EtZev' and began to softly dance around the house. _Maybe she wants to see me. Maybe I can come home. Oh, Goddess … please let me go home. Let me sit at her feet again, feel her kiss again, see her smile and hear her laugh. Please_.

She thought of the party. Seeing her family again ... Mother. Theia. Being back in the T'Soni world was all she could wish for. And then the sound of the front door being opened was heard. Liara stopped, frowned and braced herself. _How do I tell Nicia that I am attending a T'Soni event without her?_ The invitation had only been for Liara with no allowance of a guest. Liara had known what that meant; Nicia was not given access or approval. _I just won't tell her. I can't deal with her anger right now. I must keep my strength for mother. I will not tell her_.

Nicia opened the door to see her lover standing in the living room, towel in hand and a smile on her face. It had been a while since Liara had smiled that way and Nicia smiled back. "Good evening, erotas."

"Good evening." Liara hated it when Nicia called her that. It always brought her back to the party and the look on her mother's face. _Don't think about that … You will see mother soon. Just smile and keep Nicia happy. Keep peace_. "How was the lecture?"

"Wonderful! I was absolutely brilliant! Professor Tyrian looked like a fool when I spoke after her. She thinks that she is a quite the speaker but I showed her how one with true talent …" As Nicia went on about her own abilities, Liara drifted.

She was thinking of the party. Her cousin. Her mother. The dress that she had just purchased for the party. It was a traditional monium dress that when worn was more flesh than fabric. Sibila had smiled when she had shown Liara what she wanted her to wear, expecting her cousin to protest. Instead, Liara had loved it. "Oh, Li-Li! Why you have changed!" Sibila had teased. "Now if I could get you to Illium ... The trouble I could get you into. There are so many pleasures just waiting there! And there is even underground clubs there that you can go to in masquerade ... no one knows who you are. It's absolutely decadent!"

"Liara, are you even listening to me?" Nicia whined.

Liara startled, looked at her partner and knew that Nicia was starting to get angry. She smiled, touched her cheek, "Always. I just thought that maybe we could finish this in bed."

"Not tonight," Nicia barked. "I have to grade papers and respond to letters of inquiry about next term." _Not to mention that my left wrist is still numb from our last time_._ Why must you always try new things in bed? _

As Nicia went into the washroom, Liara stood looking out the window smiling. She looked at the city lights, humming that little human piece again, slowly swaying and thinking of her new dress.


	15. Anatolius Rebellion

"Let me dress that wound," Hannah pulled Shepard to her as she sat in her kitchen chair. Shepard had a cut over her eye and was applying pressure to it. The cut ran through her right eyebrow and Hannah knew that she would need to stitch it up. Ricky and Tyler were standing by the kitchen door looking guilty.

"It's okay, mom. It'll stop bleeding soon … I promise." Shepard squirmed as she saw her mother open the first aid kit and pull out the stitching needle. "Aw, mom! I swear it'll stop bleeding!"

"Elizabeth! Stop it! I'll put the numbing cream on it so you won't feel a thing!" Shepard started pouting and it tickled Hannah. "Now, now, momma's little baby ... Don't be afraid."

Ricky and Tyler started to laugh, causing Shepard to stand up straight, "I'm not afraid! I just think that you're overreacting … like … like a mother!"

"Like a mother? A mother, you say?" Hannah looked over at the two boys and asked her daughter, "I wonder why that is? Could it be because I am your mother?" Shepard shrugged defeat. "So do I want to know how this happened?"

"We were helping Tyler with his homework." Shepard mumbled as Tyler dropped his head and Ricky picked at the screen door.

Hannah fought back laughing as she began applying the numbing cream, "And what subject matter would require a head injury?" Hannah's question was met with silence. "Tyler?"

"Newton's laws of motion, Mrs. Shepard." Tyler answered still looking at his feet.

Hannah looked at her daughter's face, "and am I looking at the outside force?"

"You know Newton's laws of motion?" Ricky seemed impressed, looking at the pastor in a whole new light. "Wow, Pastor Shepard! Who would a thunk?"

"I was just …" Hannah put her hand over her daughter's mouth and shook her head.

"I don't think I really need to know," Hannah began stitching up her daughter's cut. "Ignorance is bliss."

As Hannah neared finishing up with her daughter's injury, Pierce's jeep could be heard pulling in. The two boys looked at each other and then went racing out the back door. Hannah and Shepard could hear them telling Pierce what "cool experiment" they had just tried. Pierce was trying to calm the boys down, trying to make sense of all their excited jabbering as he came in through the kitchen door.

"What cool experiment …" Pierce stopped as he saw Hannah sewing up his kid. "Shit ... Uh, I mean shucks! What happened here?"

"Sir Isaac Newton," his wife answered as she applied the bandage over the stitching. As Pierce opened his mouth, Hannah shook her head, "We do not need to know, husband. I have now resigned myself to being Ms. Elizabeth Shepard's private nurse and as long as her injuries are not sustained as a result of fighting and she survives without too much damage, we will waive all interrogations going forward. Understood?"

Both Shepard and Pierce looked at Hannah surprised. "Are you feeling okay, momma?" Shepard asked.

"Fine." Hannah patted her daughter on the behind and motioned for her and her friends to go outside and play. "Do not mess with that bandage and be careful! I don't want you to split that open!" After they were out the door, Hannah kissed her husband on the cheek and began to clean up the mess.

Pierce put down his coat and lunch box, eyed his wife suspiciously, "Okay. Where is my wife?"

Hannah looked into her husband's eyes, "After 13 years of her building makeshift ladders, falling from trees, rollerskating into lakes …" Pierce laughed at that memory, "swinging from ceiling fans, diving off of the Anatolius cliffs …" Pierce stopped laughing, "Oh yes, husband. Our daughter spends an occasional Saturday diving off those cliffs with the boys."

"The cliffs? How? Why?" Pierce half choked.

Hannah sighed, "Because she is the great Shepard!" Hannah threw her hands up and mimicked Tyler and Ricky. It made Pierce laugh at his wife's rare display of mimicry.

"Hannah," he pulled her close. "Why would she jump off the cliffs? You must be mistaken."

"Mistaken? No ... As to why, well I'm sure that you've seen her daredevil side in action." Hannah looked at her husband and his smiled turned to guilt as he thought of her bike jumps. "Hm-hm ... I see on your face that we both have not shared our daughter's risks with each other. Or at least not in a timely matter?"

"When did you see her jump off …" He thought of the cliffs. They were at least 40 feet to … The sight of a shuima, the name of that horsefish with teeth, came into his mind. "Shit, Hannah! What is wrong with her? She could be eaten!"

Hannah looked at her husband confused, "What?"

"What?" Pierce realized what he said, "I mean, she could drown."

"Well, I didn't see her jump," Hannah confessed. "One of my parishioners did while passing by the cliffs and informed me last Sunday."

"And you didn't tell me?" Pierce was really worried about his daughter. "We need to stop that! I say we ground her until she's … she's…"

"Thirty?" His wife laughed as she made him sit down. She then sat on his lap, "Pierce, every time she leaves my side I hold my breath until she returns. Every time that I can't hear her or see her … my heart stops until she is next to me again."

"I never knew that." Pierce looked into his wife's eyes. There were lines, crow's feet, and he knew that his eyes were also carrying the years but he thought how much more beautiful hers were ... The years had made her eyes deeper, wiser and … "I love you, Hannah."

Hannah pulled back from him, startled by the change, but glad his worried look was gone. "I love you too, Pierce." Hannah kissed her husband on the forehead, stood up and started cleaning out his lunch box. "You didn't like the leftover meatloaf?" She asked as she opened his dish and saw just a few bites were taken.

"What?" Pierce was back to thinking about his kid now that Hannah wasn't so close. "No, it was good. Work was so busy that I barely had time to … Hannah, aren't you going to stop her?"

Hannah put his dirty dishes in the sink as she looked out the window, "If my prayers haven't kept her safe all this time then." Hannah looked over at her husband, "I can't stop her from being who she is … at least not the daring side of her. That courage is beautiful; I just pray that her mind, her eventual maturity tempers it. Lord knows I've tried to teach her restraint, self-control."

Pierce walked behind his wife and hugged her from behind as they both looked out the window over the sink. There they saw their daughter and her friends chasing Moonie and laughing. "But if something happens … that fish, I mean cliff …"

Hannah smiled, "I have to have faith that there is someone greater watching over her. I won't always be here … and neither will you husband." She leaned the back of her head on his chest as he hugged her tighter. "She has to fall a few times, fail a few times to grow. To gain wisdom and …I just have to believe that she will survive and come through it an amazing woman. I have to believe that or I'm going to chain myself to her!"

Pierce seeing his wife chained to their kid made him laugh. Shepard was a ball of energy and his wife was the calm of the house. "If you are going to chain yourself to anyone, Mrs. Shepard, then that will be me."

"I already did," Hannah turned around and started pushing him to the living room, "Now, you promised to fix my coffee table this evening."

* * *

"Do you think that your parents know?" Ricky asked as they stood on the bank of the river.

Shepard turned around to look at the back of her home, "I don't thinks so. Daddy definitely not, but momma is smart. And she has her spies." Shepard bit at her thumbnail, squinting as the evening light shone in her face. She had always thought that her mother had powers, that she could see her all the time. Now, a little older, a little wiser, she knew that her mother was not the mother of omnipotence. Close, but not quite.

"What time are we supposed to be there?" Tyler asked as he threw a rock at a shuima off in the distance.

Shepard seeing it grabbed her friend and shook her head, "Don't do that. The shuimas don't hurt anyone. If you want to throw rocks at something, find a faecies bug."

"I hate those things!" Ricky squinched his nose. "They smell and they bite. Remember the last bite I had, Shep? Blue puss came out! Blue! I hate the color blue."

"Huh? What about Elnora?" Tyler reminded Ricky of his new asari net pal. "Isn't she blue?"

"You know what I mean!" Ricky punched Tyler playfully in the arm.

"Have you told her that you are only 13?" Shepard asked as she ruffled her dog.

"No, I uploaded a picture of my uncle in the Alliance." Ricky said just a little embarrassed. "I don't want her to know I'm a kid."

"How old is she?" Tyler asked.

Shepard pushed her friend, "Ty! You don't ever ask a girl her age!"

"I think she must be around 19 at least, her picture looks like she is." Ricky pulled out a copy that he carried in his back pocket and showed Tyler. "See."

"Wow!" Tyler went to show the picture to Shepard, "Hey Shep, have you …"

"No thanks!" Shepard shook her head, "You seen one …"

"Shepard's just jealous!" Ricky teased. "Her krogan boyfriend never came back!"

"Oh, yeah!" Shepard picked up Ricky and carried him over to the river. As she went to toss him in, he pulled her with him. As they came up laughing, Shepard's bandage over her eye hung down as the stitching was torn and the cut bleeding again. "Oh, Bacchus!"

"Pastor, ain't gonna be too happy." Ricky laughed.

Shepard shrugged and started the walk to her mother, bracing for her scolding.

* * *

"Welcome to the first class of Jun Fan Jeet Kune Do. As the founder of this fighting style believed, physical combat is spontaneous and as such, unpredictable. So you must be prepared to react to anything that may come your way, to _be like water _as Jun Fan would say and respond with an open mind and without hesitation."

Ricky, Tyler, Broder and Shepard were standing just outside the mat listening to Master Rickman. Rickman had just moved to Mindoir and opened a martial arts studio. He had come to their school and gave a presentation that caught the wild imaginations of the kids. They all saw themselves being a martial artist in just one lesson, not realizing what would really be required. The training, practice, sweat, studies.

They had all brought their signed permission slips, some even their parents but Shepard knew that her mother would say no. So she had forged her parents name and told them that she was going to the library to study.

"Can't you go to hell for lyin' to a preacher?" Tyler whispered as they waited for the training to start.

"I don't think it counts if she is your mom," Ricky whispered back.

As the two boys quietly argued over whether their friend had just sent her soul to hell, Broder leaned over and whispered, "I can't believe that you didn't tell your parents. What will the pastor do if she finds out?"

Shepard shrugged, "I'm not really sure." Seeing Master Rickman disable four men with speed and economy of motion at school hit a nerve. Just like when Aunt B let her shoot the sniper rifle … love at first sight. Now she was listening to the sensei, words like _sil lim tao_, _bil-jee_ and _chi sao_ didn't mean anything to her but they held secrets. Secrets of control … control of self and control of others. She was ready to follow the master anywhere that he required. This was her church, her place to worship and she was determined to master this religion. She would need to be really careful, though. She wasn't worried about her father finding out, although she knew that he would be a little upset that she didn't trust him enough to tell him. Shepard was worried that her mother would find out and that would be that. She had to admit that her mother had stepped back a little but this … "I will not have a violent daughter!" rang in her ears. No, momma wouldn't understand the rush that Shepard got when she was standing toe to toe with someone. Make a wrong move, underestimate your opponent didn't mean "go to jail" or "spin again" … it meant a busted lip. She loved the challenge!

"Well, you got guts," Broder smiled. "Just promise that you won't cry."

Shepard looked at him, "Cry? When have you ever seen me cry?"

Broder looked down at her and he had to admit that he had never seen her cry ... not Shepard. She was not like any girl he had ever met before ... heck, she wasn't like anyone he had ever met before. "Well, I'm just saying ... no crying."

Shepard shook her head, "As long as you don't!"

That made Broder laugh, "Okay!"

* * *

Once Birgit had started dating Lisa Hale life started to change for the Sheriff. She still loved the preacher but she was more at ease around her and Lisa pulled her over to the Shepard house more often. Now on Tuesday's, after choir practice, Birgit would meet Lisa at the Shepard's and they would have dinner together and play cards. Birgit would minimize how often she looked at the pastor but she was at least able to semi-relax with Lisa leading the way. "There was another cave-in at the mine."

Pierce looked at the Sheriff, "Really? How many were hurt or kill-?"

"Four injured ... no deaths," Hannah answered as she pulled a card from the stock pile.

Pierce looked at Hannah, "Please tell me that you weren't there."

Hannah, as she pulled her discard looked at him, "No ... One of my congregation told me."

"That is such a dangerous job," Lisa frowned as she pulled a card from the stock pile. "But that is also a dangerous place ... Moorland."

"Shi ... uh, yeah. A couple of those sourdoughs got a little rough in the Knocking Shop," the Sheriff started ... stopping long enough to grab up Pierce's discard.

"Wait!" he cried out, "I didn't mean to drop that card!"

"Fuc-" B stopped and looked over at the pastor who was looking at the clock. "I mean, sorry Charlie!"

"Thief!" he groused, winking at Lisa.

Lisa laughed and then looked at Hannah, "Where is Elizabeth?"

"At the library," Pierce answered as he watched his wife pick up B's discard and called out, "Gin rummy!"

Hannah knew better ... She thought that she had read some deception in her daughter's voice and so she had called the library. No Elizabeth as she suspected. Then she called Taryn Parks, Ricky's mom, and learned that he was taking some kind of martial arts class. If she were to make a guess, she would say that her daughter was there watching the class. After all, she would need a permission slip from her or Pierce to join. She knew by Pierce's answer that he had no idea where she was ... As she watched her husband shuffle the cards she wondered if ... _no, she wouldn't do that. Would she? Elizabeth would you forge my signature? _As she started pulling up her cards off the table she knew that she would need to investigate this class and her daughter's involvement. Discreetly though ... Elizabeth was growing up and Hannah was struggling on where she needed to keep a tight grip and let loose. _Baby, it was so much easier when you were little. _

* * *

Later that evening when Shepard got home she found her parents still playing gin rummy with Aunt B and her girlfriend Lisa. Shepard greeted everyone after kissing her mother and saw her dinner plate on the stove. "Dinner?"

Hannah looked up at her daughter, "Hm-mm. How was the library? Did you finish your studies or do you need my help?"

Shepard opened the fridge, looked at her choices and pulled out the tea. "Naw, I'm good." Shepard saw that her mother's glass was almost empty and refilled it as she looked at her dad's cards. She picked on her Aunt B, then grabbed her plate, tea and a slice of cake and started to head for her room.

"Wait!" Hannah pulled her back closer. "Was the library crowded tonight?"

Shepard juggling her meal smiled, "Not really. Love you!"

Shepard was getting better at hiding the truth but Hannah knew the one tell-tale sign ... Shepard would crinkle just a little in her right eye. She was lying to her ... "I love you too! Make sure you clean those dishes when you are done. Okay?"

"Yes, ma'am." Shepard thought she saw her mother reading her but she knew that she had fooled her. Yep, I'm just too quick for you now ... Shepard -one, preacher - zero!"

As Shepard made it into her room she quickly put her meal on her desk and opened her window after she heard Moonie bark just outside it. She let Moonie in, fed her fish, turned on her netbook, searched Jun Fan Jeet Kune Do, sat back and while she ate began to study the four ranges of combat. The words _be like water _challenging her. _Be like water_.


	16. The Ring of Kroustar

The water was a shade of Persian Rose that washed down the serenity wall facing the courtyard entrance to Tatiaria T'Soni's private Estate. It then spilled into the stream that snaked throughout the main courtyard and into the house itself. Liara stopped in front of the waterfall and thought of times past that her and her cousin would run through the water, leaving wet tracks all through the house. Her mother and aunt would chase after the two little giggling girls finally catching them, scooping them up in their arms and kissing their faces.

"Li-Li!" Sibila had been keeping an eye out for her since her hour of invitation had arrived. In the asari culture, invitations had different times on each, based on status of the guest both socially and as it pertained to the host. The earlier you were invited, the lower the status and the later that you were invited to the social event, the more important. It allowed the one with the highest rank or status to make the strongest entrance and be admired by all. There were only three other individuals scheduled to arrive after Liara … The Matriarch was to be the last as the Matriarch Livia was staying at the estate while in Armali. Siby had not waited long, since she knew the time appointed to her cousin. To not be punctual at social events was considered both an insult and a social faux pas that could result in future invitations not forthcoming.

"Oh, Siby! You look so lovely!" Sibila was wearing a Persian Rose sash around her waist and a lilac net throw around her breasts while Liara wore a Persian Rose cloth that wrapped around her at an angle, covering just her lower bottom and breasts. "You will have all the eyes on you tonight."

"Me? No one will notice me with you in the room!" The cousins kissed and turned to face the wall. "I wonder if we would get into too much trouble if we played in the …"

Liara laughed and gave a little shove to her cousin, "You first."

After Sibila had spoken with her mother about the Matriarch, she wanted to make sure that nothing went wrong with her aunt and cousin this evening. Sibila had always been protective of her Li-Li and even though she knew that Liara was brighter than her, she felt that her cousin was somehow less prepared for the world. "You can assimilate historical documents with ease, grasp written languages almost supernaturally quick … but one good joke or one simple comment can throw you! What will become of you when you go out into the real world?" She had once teased, but she meant it.

Sibila put her bare foot out under the water and it caused Liara to giggle, step out of her sandal and put her bare foot under it too. The girls looked at each other mischievously when they heard the mistress of the house clear her throat behind them. "Don't even think about it you two, if you have a desire to refresh yourself, the pool of serenity can be found through those doors."

Liara and her cousin stood back, smiling and then Liara greeted her aunt with a kiss and brush to the cheek. "Theia, may your home be a place of peace, grace and prosperity."

Tatiaria took her nieces hands, turned them palm side up and kissed both tenderly, "You have been missed, daughter. May your presence not be denied from this home again." Liara felt emotions trying to cause her own waterfall and her aunt sensing it brushed her cheek, "Now, leave this courtyard before the temptation to dance in my wall of serenity becomes too great. Mingle, mingle mingle."

The two girls tried to look innocent and then Sibila took her cousin's hand, escorting her into the main common area. Sibila was pointing out updates to the house but made sure that Liara saw the painting that she had given to her aunt 40 years ago. It was still hanging in a place of honor above her mother's reading chair. Next to the chair on the table were family videos in frames including one with the two little girls playing in and around the wall of water. Tucked in the back was a still photo of a salarian named Tolack Hinron. Tatiaria had chosen to mate with this salarian after discussions with her partner of 222 years, Antonina Delana. Delana knew that she had wanted a daughter and following asari custom, a donor was chosen in place of Tatiaria's asari lover. Delana arranged the meld for mating purposes with a business associate on Sur'Kesh. For the act, Delana had made him an executive at her company that was based on Rannadril until his death. Many asari that were in relations with another asari would seek out individuals of a different species for the purposes of mating only. This type of mating was done without sexual pleasure but with the asari moving into the mind of the other and taking what she needed. It lasted just a few minutes ... nothing more.

"Liara," Delana smiled at her, "You look pretty tonight; let me see you two daughters together." As the cousins stood next to each other, Delana filmed them, kissed them both and encouraged them to mingle. "Do not be stingy with your loveliness tonight. Now, as Tati would say …"

In unison, Delana and Sibila both said, "Mingle, mingle, mingle!" and all three laughed.

* * *

As the two young cousins greeted fellow guests, Tatiaria was nervously waiting for her elder sister to arrive. She wanted her sister to reconcile with her daughter tonight. But she was not sure if that would happen. Delana seeing her mate's nervousness, walked over and placed her arm around her waist, "Tati, calm yourself. Everything will be fine."

"I hope that you are right. Benezia can be so stubborn sometimes."

"The Matriarch knows what she is doing," Delana whispered, "and when did you start losing faith in her?"

Tatiaria looked at her partner, "When she let Liara move out and then not see her for three years. Three years? She even refused me to see her daughter. My niece! Leaving Liara all alone out there."

Delana looked at Liara and Sibila visiting with other cousins and family friends, laughing and sharing secrets as they moved along. "The Matriarch would never do anything to hurt her daughter. With her wisdom, she must know what she is doing … and … I'm afraid that we can't protect the two little water beasts anymore, Tati."

Tatiaria laughed at her mate's nickname for the daughters, "Water beasts! If they attack my waterfall tonight they will be … I will …" Tatiaria did not finish because the air in the room shifted, the mood became more electric and people began to shift towards the entryway. "Sister is here!"

Sibila and Liara had been laughing with two of Delana's daughters when the room changed. Liara's stomach began to ache, her throat dry as her cousin took her by the arm and moved her to a smaller and very private courtyard. "Siby, mother is here."

As they sat by a fountain, Liara tried catching her breath. "Shhh, Li-Li … everything will be fine. Theia is looking forward to seeing us perform the charis together. You are, after all, my monium. And we both know that she loves you, so stop worrying. Everything will be okay. I promise!" _Oh Goddess, please let everything be okay._

To be chosen as someone's monium was one of the highest honors bestowed by one asari to another. This was the person that you chose as your witness in the temple of Athame as you stepped into adulthood. Traditionally the monium would already have passed into adulthood herself, since the rite in the temple was not to be heard until you had reached the next stage of maturation. To choose, as Sibila did, a younger person it had to be approved by a Matriarch, a Priestess of Athame and both mothers. This was rarely granted but Liara had supporters throughout the asari society on Thessia.

Benezia had arrived with her private companion, Kyriake Alexakis, and was trying to ignore the knot in her stomach, something that she knew her daughter had inherited from her. Her daughter who was here ... here and waiting to see her. She was fighting the desire to seek her daughter out. She had not seen her Little Wing for over three years but had sat in her daughter's room countless nights, refusing to move one item or change the room. She had looked at her daughter's many paintings in their home, looked at vids and cried privately over her daughter's absence from her life. While many believed that she had cut Liara completely out of her life, she had not really deserted her daughter … no. The matriarch was still guiding her … watching over her. She knew every little thing that not only her daughter did, but the professor. Oh, yes … she was keeping a tight watch over everything and like a mother, no … like a Matriarch, she was ready to strike if she sensed any true harm to her off-spring. Minor pain was allowed. Anything more and the professor would not survive.

"Sister, please accept my gratitude for your presence in my home." Tatiaria bowed her head as she waited for her sister to show approval by kissing her own palm and placing it on her sister's head. These were rituals of old that were still followed on Thessia and in asari space. Outside this area, like Illium, the customs of old were not followed except privately in the homes of an asari and only with their kind. There were many customs, exchanges and secrets in the asari world that they kept from the other species. Yes, the asari had many secrets and the rituals of Athame were the least dangerous.

"Sister, I am touched by your invitation to your lovely home on this very special day." Benezia and her sister kissed and then Tatiaria put her arm through her sister's and guided her to the place of honor. In the main courtyard there was a beautiful fountain that had Athame in the center with asari made of adama dancing around her with additional asari playing, loving and making music on the remaining tiers. The water fell down six tiers into a pool that allowed guests to sit on the steps that led into and out of the pool. The fountain had been a present from the Matriarch over 200 years prior and two statues in the fountain were of them as maidens. They were sharing a secret on the third tier as the Goddess looked on. Facing the front of Athame and the pool was a sitting area made of marble with pillows, covers and tapestry to soften it for comfort. Benezia was given the center of the seating area and began receiving guests as her sister sat to her right.

* * *

"Li-Li, we must pay honor to the Matriarch," Sibila softly reminded her. "Mother must have her in the place of honor by now. It would be a disgrace if you and I did not present ourselves."

Liara was still trying to calm her stomach, "You go. Mother will not miss me."

Sibila stood and put out her hand, "Liara T'Soni, we are not paying honor to your mother. We are paying honor to the Matriarch Benezia. If you do not want to dishonor your mother, my mother or the T'Soni name you will rise and wait as required."

Sibila was correct. This was not about her mother or her but about asari society and its rules ... She was part of the Corallium Circle and all of its responsibilities ... She would not be seeing her mother but the Matriarch. One did not make the Matriarch wait, you waited. So Liara and Sibila walked to the place of honor to be introduced by the hostess of the party. Liara saw her mother kissing one of their cousins as she walked up. Liara's heart jumped and she wanted to be a small child again. She wanted to run to her mother and wrap her arms around her waist and hear her mother laugh. Feel her kisses and the touch of her hand. Instead she waited to be introduced to the Matriarch.

Benezia had seen her daughter as she was walking up and wanted to give a slight pat to her own leg, a pat that would have invited her daughter to hug her, to give her instant access to her grace. But this was not the time or place even if they were on good terms. Instead the Matriarch continued greeting others and made the two daughters wait for the appropriate time. The Matriarch, after greeting her mother's youngest sister, the Matriarch Livia, she looked over at her own sister and gave a slight nod. Tatiaria stood and quieted the crowd as she walked to her daughter and her niece. "My beloved sister and Matriarch, may I present my daughter? My daughter, who on this eve will pass from child to adult in the temple of the Goddess Athame."

The Matriarch smiled and gave a small hand motion. Sibila walked to her aunt and took her hand as she bent low and placed the hand over her heart, "We thank you for honoring our home and gracing us with your presence, my beloved Theia and Matriarch. May I make you proud tonight and honor the T'Soni name."

The Matriarch smiled, kissed her niece on the cheek and presented her with a ring that had belonged to the T'Soni family since 800 BCE, "As the oldest of the next generation to the much beloved and respected Justicar Cerelia T'Soni, I present you with her ring of Kroustar that was presented to her after leading the defeat against the Myndourites."

The Myndourites were a tribe on Thessia that followed an ardat**-**yakshi, who had seduced and controlled her followers for over 600 years. This tribe, under her direction, had struck fear and ultimetly controlled a great portion of Thessia for centuries. Their reign was finally cut down by a small group of asari led by a maiden, Cerelia T'Soni. Cerelia had watched her village located in modern day Armali destroyed and her family killed by a Myndourite army. They had been bored and had not only set the village on fire but tortured many of the villagers for entertainment. Cerelia, hidden with her friend, watched the massacre and swore that before she took her final breath every last Myndourite would be dead. By her 306th year, she stood before the ardat-yakshi … dead soldiers at her feet, the head of the military's general held high by her and with one final thrust into the cold heart of the true leader … the reign of the tribe and the ardat-yakshi's life was over. The ring had been given to her in honor of what she had done. Cerelia went on to help rebuild Armali and the surrrounding areas ... and eventually chose as her partner the daughter of the general she had slaughtered. Her vow to destroy every Myndourite squashed by her love for Pastora. When her mate died fighting in "one more war" centuries later, Cerelia battled to retrieve her lover's body. Once she had her mate she returned home, giving her a proper burial in the meadows of Agelast which was from that day forward the family burial grounds of the T'Soni ... As a remembrance of that bond and display of loyalty the T'Soni's go to her memorial once every hundred years. Cerelia then gave all that she had to her eldest daughter and seeing the need for innocents to be protected was responsible for the order of the Justicars. The diamond of Kroustar which was given to her eldest daughter was then passed on to her eldest and as custom each generation since was handed the ring as the eldest reached the age of adulthood.

Sibila looking at the ring placed on her finger wanted to give it back. Her hand shook as she felt the weight ... felt the responsibility that the ring held. _This should be on Liara's hand_, she thought. _It does not belong to me. She is destined for greater things than me_. _Can I give it to her? I must ask mother._ Sibila choked out her gratitude and her mother also thanked the Matriarch as she guided her daughter to the side.

Tatiaria then went to her niece, "My beloved sister and Matriarch, may I present the daughter of my elder sister? She is my own daughter's monium and a dearest to both my daughter and I. Liara T'Soni."

The Matriarch saw the apprehension in her daughter's eyes, tilted her head just slightly telling Liara _calm daughter_, smiled softly and then gave the small hand motion. Liara took a deep breath then walked to the Matriarch and took her hand as she bent low and placed the hand over her heart, "Thank you for honoring and gracing us with your presence, my beloved Mother and Matriarch. May I make you proud tonight and honor the T'Soni name."

The Matriarch smiled, kissed her daughter on the cheek and as Liara went to rise was stopped by the Matriarch. Benezia had placed her hand on her daughter's shoulder, signifying for her to stay. "Sister," Benezia looked at Tatiaria and spoke of the night's schedule as Liara stayed bent at her mother, her hand on her heart. She would have gladly stayed in that position all night with her mother touching her. But once Benezia was finished talking with her sister, she looked at her daughter, lowered to her ear and whispered, "Don't forget the 7 santras tonight in the temple, my lovely daughter", and then motioned for her to rise. "Rise and rejoin your cousin, monium." As Benezia watched her daughter leave her heart ached, as she had wanted to request a cushion for her daughter to sit at her feet, head on her lap, but that could not be. Not now.

* * *

"See," Sibila whispered, "Everything is ok. Theia wants you here! I saw her whisper to you. Give you a little of her grace in private." Liara waved her hands at her eyes, trying to keep the tears away and Sibila teased, "And here I thought it was my day!"

Liara fighting back the tears went to the fountain and stripped. Sibila smiled and joined her. The two walked in to the pool and found a seating area close to the asari statue that was sitting on the bottom tier and playing a dlute. Liara, tears of happiness starting to come, dunked herself, head submerged and tears mixing with the cool water. As she came up she saw the statue and smiled, she was home, home with her people, her family and even her mother. No, this was not the home she shared with the Matriarch, but this was one of her homes, family homes. "Mother kissed me."

"Of course," Sibila hugged her cousin. "She kissed you and cursed me."

"Cursed you?" Liara was confused.

Sibila raised her hand with the Kroustar diamond. "Cursed me! I don't deserve this ring!"

Liara giggled, "Why? I thought that you were planning on defending a small village somewhere."

Sibila frowned at her cousin, "Right. That is your job isn't it?"

"Not unless it is in a ruin somewhere. I'm afraid that the only dead bodies or villains I'll ever see are bound to be in the form of rotten old corpses. So I am afraid cousin that you will need to be the hero."

"Of course," Sibila smiled then looked over at two guests, "I'll be right back. Mingle. Mingle. Mingle. That's mother's mantra at these events." Sibila made a face as she left her cousin's side.

Liara looked over at her mother who was deep in conversation with her Theia. Benezia turned to look at her daughter and Liara quickly turned away, afraid to see disappointment on the face of the Matriarch. Liara had turned to see her cousin, splashing Delana's daughters … Asari at birth have only one connection, and it is the second strongest that they will ever have. The connection with their mother and that connection would only be surpassed when they had their own daughters. _Mother, let me come home_. Asari as they grow and mature, slowly open up to connect with their immediate family and then close family friends. The final phase, which would blossom in their adult years, would see their connections expanded but at a more complicated way that needed guidance from elder asari. For an asari to start opening up to outsiders it could be confusing, frightening and painful for them.

"Liara?" A young asari slid up next to her and smiled, "I don't think that you remember me. I'm Eveline. I went to school with you when we were just in our 30's."

Liara smiled, "Eveline? Of course I remember you. How are you?"

* * *

Eveline had been even shyer than Liara and so they had never interacted. Now here on her cousin's birthday celebration they were chatting like long lost friends. Sibila and Tatiaria saw the two smiling and talking together and looked at each other and smiled. _You are right, mother. She would be perfect for Li-Li_, Sibila thought as they saw their little plan start to play out.

Benezia seeing her sister's smile leaned next to her, "And what little web are you spinning, my dearest?"

Tatiaria smiled, brushed her sister's cheek and whispered, "Only the finest, sister."

Benezia laughed, "Sister, be careful that you don't get caught in your own web!"


	17. Jousting a Can of Peaches

"I had to read her Charlotte's Web twice!" Ricky complained. "I hope mom gets back on day shift soon. Fannie is such a baby!" Ricky's mom was a widow who worked at the New Horizon Hospital trying to raise Ricky and his 6 year-old-sister. Their father, Rick Sr., had worked in the mine and was killed in the collapse of 2152 that took the lives of 26 men and 4 women. The life insurance paid off the mortgage, their debt and set up a college fund for both children. But it did not cover the day to day expenses and so his mother, Taryn Parks, worked as a nurse's aide.

"That's not so bad." Shepard said as she saw Broder step outside Rurik's Grocer to sweep the sidewalk. "Have you noticed how odd Broder's been lately?"

"Odd?" Ricky looked over at their friend. "No. What's been odd about him?"

"He smiles weird." Ricky looked at her with a confused face. "Since the last time we were on the Anatolius cliffs he has acted weird. Smiling at me and … Oh, I don't know how to explain it. Just kinda weird."

Ricky shook his head, "Sorry. He seems normal to me … Do you want to go get some ice cream?"

"Sure. I've got a couple bucks on me." As the two kids got up from the park bench Shepard saw her mother coming down the street. She was carrying a bag from the fabric store and trailing behind her were two men making vulgar sounds and propositioning her. Hannah was ignoring them as she continued to walk and Shepard could feel her anger rise. She looked at Ricky, embarrassed for her mother, and ran across the street to Rurik's Grocers. She ran inside, grabbing a 28 oz can of peaches and a mop for sale. She ran back outside with Mr. Rurik running behind her yelling, "Eli! You have to pay for those!" She stopped a few feet away from the men, wound back with the can of peaches and using all her strength she let the can fly at her target … hitting the taller of the men in the head. Blood flew as he went down, his hand against his forehead and crying out in pain as Shepard then focused on her next target. Like a knight jousting, she lowered the handle side of the mop and drove it with all her weight into the second guy, knocking the both of them off their feet.

"Elizabeth!" She could hear her mother cry out as she began hitting the man in the face. His friend was still down for the count, bleeding and yelling while he was trying to catch his breath. Shepard was in a rage, adrenaline pumping and fists pounding into him. Hannah tried pulling her daughter off of the man but Shepard was so wound up that she pushed her mother away and continued hitting him. Hannah reached out again and with all her strength, pulled her daughter off. "Elizabeth! Baby, it's okay. Stop! Baby! Please stop!"

Shepard could hear her mother and then realized that she was in her mother's arms, tears running down her eyes, trying to catch her breath and wanting to throw up. Hannah seeing her daughter emotionally and physically exhausted continued holding her, brushing back her hair and whispering soothing words in her own native tongue. As the Sheriff arrived she could hear Hannah whispering the soft words of French, soothing her daughter and kissing her. The Sheriff had been pulled out of the station by Broder who had seen the whole thing and rushed to get her. "Shepard will kill em' if you don't come!" he had said in a panic. Broder had remembered a few fights where he and Ricky had to pull Shepard off other kids. She would never start a fight, but she sure would end one. That is, until today ... Today, she had attacked and it scared both her friends.

The Sheriff in questioning both men and the witnesses wanted to kick their teeth in, but kept her composure and focused on performing her sworn duty. She had the men escorted to the Highland Falls police station and then bent down where Hannah and Shepard were. She saw that her Eli was breathing funny and asked softly, "Pastor, are you two okay? Should I get a doctor for Eli?"

Hannah, still trying to calm her daughter down, shook her head and softly answered. "We just need a minute, Sheriff. Elizabeth just needs to relax, to close her eyes and relax. She'll be fine."

"Of course, pastor. When you are ready, I'll be at the station," Birgit said as she patted Eli's back and looked over at Broder, "Go get doctor Kristoff and have him come to the station to look at those two fuckwits … I mean, men. Sorry pastor." As Birgit entered the station and saw the two miners she wanted to laugh. Two grown men damaged by a kid … but she also was worried. Shepard was getting bigger and even though she looked like a slender ballerina, there was a surprising strength and fearlessness in her. And there was also a temper that had started to appear more often now. Why just a few days prior she had seen Shepard jump on a boy her own age after he had made a smart remark about her friend Ricky. Birgit had scolded her and told her that if she didn't straighten up that she would need to tell the pastor. Shepard had apologized and promised to behave. _I'll talk to Pierce tonight. Eli is getting into more fights and today she could have killed these two idiots. And I saw fear on the pastor. She must have known that this fuckwit could have been killed by peaches today. Fuck!_

"I can't breathe, momma." Shepard said through her tears, her breathing short and quick.

Hannah had seen her own mother struggle for breathe after one of her moments of anger and just held her daughter, "I know, ma petite chou. It's okay. Just relax. Breathe slowly."

"What's wrong with me momma?" Shepard began to struggle for her breath and before Hannah could answer, her daughter was out.

* * *

Shepard didn't know how long she had been out ... but the next thing she knew, she was in her own bed. After she had passed out Hannah had asked Stu who was at work to take Shepard home while she went to the police station. Once Hannah returned home, she thanked Stu then changed Shepard into her pajamas, placed a cold rag on her forehead, covered her, kissed her lips and left her to sleep. Now that Shepard was awake, she couldn't hear any movement in the house which was good because she had a massive headache. On her desk were two pills, a glass of water and a note reading _Elizabeth, take these and practice your lessons on the piano. Your father and I will be home later. Love, mom_.

"I am really concerned about Eli," Birgit was telling Pierce. "That man could have been killed. Killed!"

Pierce was sitting on the edge of his friends' desk, "Ah, shit B … I would have thrown more than a can at some guy making lewd remarks at my wife! She was protecting her mother, that's all. I don't-"

"You don't what, husband?" Hannah asked in the doorway.

"Pastor," Birgit jumped up and offered Hannah a seat. "Is Eli okay?"

"She is fine," Hannah said as she sat down. "What are we discussing?"

"B and I were just talking about Eli … uh, we thought that maybe she should see a counselor or a psychiatrist," Pierce looked at his wife hoping that she agreed. "You know, maybe it's being thirteen ... you know? She seems to be more emotional lately and maybe they can give her something ... Some type of medicine that will calm her. They might have something that keeps her from being violent ... calm, you know?"

"Instead of throwing fruit and mops," Birgit half smiled at her friend, trying to lighten the moment. "Something to keep her … uh, calm."

Hannah listened as the two talked about which psychiatrist would be best for Shepard and how they felt that if she was medicated it may ease some of her nervous energy; how it might help her with her anger. They had all seen her anger flare on occasion but never at this level and as Birgit talked about what she had witnessed a few days prior, Hannah stood and walked over to the window. She knew that her daughter had shown considerable control over the years, holding back her Levasseur temper. Piano lessons, ballet, Sunday school, cliff diving, grass hockey, baseball, bike riding, school and lectures by her mother. So much put in front of her to keep her in line ... in control. Hannah could see the Levasseur temper there, trying to get out. Now here she was listening to her husband and his friend try and understand what lay beneath her daughter's calm façade. This force had been in her since she was born but Hannah had monitored it, keeping a tight rein on her daughter. Some would say that she was a little too strict, but they didn't understand what was at risk. _Elizabeth, we will get you through this. We will figure out how to turn this anger, this drive into a positive force. Please god, help me. Give me the wisdom to protect my daughter_. Across the street she saw the sign Jun Fan Jeet Kune Do … Hannah turned around to see the two friends' deep in conversation and quietly walked out.

* * *

"Pastor Shepard," Mr. Rickman smiled and excused himself from the current training class in process, "Please, come into my office."

"Thank you, Mr. Rickman." Hannah smiled, "But I did not mean to pull you from your class."

"Oh, no, my son Tait can stand in my place. He may just be 16 but he has been doing this since he was six."

The two walked into his office and while Hannah sat down, Rickman started a pot of water for tea. "I hope that you like green tea."

Hannah smiled and looked around his office, "That is fine, thank you."

"How can I help you?"

"My daughter, Elizabeth Shepard, has been attending your class, yes?"

"Why yes, you signed the approval slip." Rickman said as he offered cinnamon cookies. "Are you checking on her performance? I've been a little surprised that neither you nor your husband has come to see her in training."

Hannah smiled. She had known about her daughter's attendance shortly after that first night. The pastor had many sources, many spies when it came to her daughter. Her daughter was her primary concern and she felt no shame that she had always encouraged others to keep an eye on her. "I need your assistance, Mr. Rickman."

Rickman looked at the pastor, curious as to how he could help her. "Of course, whatever you need … uh, unless it is to attend church. I must confess that I am not a Christian. I am a follower of Buddha."

Hannah smiled at his response as she thought, _thank you God, another honest man_. "My daughter has anger issues. She has for the most part stayed in control, but the anger is there. I need help teaching her how to manage … how to use it for … for …"

"The greater good?" He smiled as he poured them both a cup of tea. "You want her to channel that negative energy into a positive force."

"I want my daughter to have a life of peace, calm and at times happiness." Hannah answered thinking of her mother's life. "I want her to know that she is good. Worthy. Loved."

Rickman looked at the pastor, "Well, the _loved_ part must come from you and the _worthy_ from herself. But I think that you know that." Rickman sat across from his guest and took a sip of his tea while looking at the middle aged woman in front of him. He saw intelligence in her eyes, but also sorrow. He could see that she had not always lived a comfortable life and thought how beautiful she was despite it. He knew that the pastor was married and thought if she were single, he would have gladly asked her out. _But that is not why she is here_, he thought to himself.

He had been surprised at the strength in the young girl named Shepard. She had a strong core and superb balance from her years in ballet and there was something in her eyes. He had seen quickness in her, a way of reading people, of sizing others up within a matter of minutes. It had also fascinated him that one so young could hold her tongue, her thoughts. While others around her babbled on she would stand around observing, listening. He had wondered where she had gotten these gifts and now he knew. The woman that this girl would one day become was sitting in front of him. They had the same green eyes, same delicate nose and facial structure … the same except for the lips. Hannah's lips were smaller and less generous. But even more importantly, they had the same quiet strength and determination. "I can work with her on the anger management part but can I ask something of you in return?"

Hannah knew that he had looked at her as a woman, with desire, and this caused her to shift. _Please don't expect something I cannot give_, "Of course."

He looked at her, caught the shift and felt embarrassed. _Damn it man, she is not a stupid or silly girl. You are sitting with a woman … a very smart woman. Show respect_. "Will you teach my son to play the piano?"

Hannah smiled.

* * *

The Shepards had just finished having the most uncomfortable family dinner ever with no one really talking. Hannah had told Pierce that she had spoken and signed up Shepard in the martial arts class. Shepard had almost choked on her food when she had heard that her mother had spoken with master Rickman. She waited for her mother to address her last two months of attendance but no words were spoken. Pierce talked about the community service that Shepard would be required to do as a result of her actions earlier. But no one talked about her temper. Yes, words were spoken but the important words went unsaid leaving the conversations stilted and formal.

As Pierce looked at his daughter over the dinner table, he tried but failed to understand where her temper came from. After all, he was laid back and Hannah was the perfect picture of control, "I just don't get it, Hannah. Where does she get that from? I'm proud that she stood up for you, but you should have seen the guy's face. And hitting the other fuckwit with a can of peaches … Birgit's right … She could have killed him."

Hannah handed him another dish to dry. "Pierce, please do not tell her that you are proud. Don't do or say anything that she might take as approval or encouragement to repeat what she did today."

Pierce looked at his wife as he took the dish, "I won't."

Hannah pulled the stopper out of the drain, "I mean it."

* * *

Shepard was sitting out on the porch, headache down to a light throb. She had thrown up once before her parents had come home and she still felt slightly weak. Her mother had only let her eat half portions and then poured her ice water and sent her on the porch, "The night air will do you some good, baby."

Shepard heard the motorbike before she saw it. Broder had built his own bike and it had a popping and wheezing sound that cracked her up. As he pulled up she stood and walked to where the bike had stalled. "Hi Broder."

Broder pulled off his helmet and goggles, "Hi. I thought I would check on you after your … well, to see if you were okay."

"Slight headache, my hand is swollen, Sheriff has me on community service, momma has me on restriction and parents aren't really talking … but other than that … fine."

"And here I was worried." Broder looked at Shepard and wanted to tell her that he liked her. Not as a friend, but as a girl. He had even known the very moment that it had happened. It was the last time that they were diving off the Anatolius Cliffs. While everyone else, himself included, had to build up their courage, standing on the ledge for a few minutes, Shepard would just smile and jump. It was on one of her jumps, racing toward the ledge that she had turned to look at him. A smile on her face that said, _follow me_. He would have followed her to hell that very moment. He would have followed her and believed that they would make it out alive. Now standing in front of her he wanted to tell her that he liked … no loved her.

"You came all the way here to just check up on me?" Shepard knew that something was off, but she just couldn't figure out what it was. Shepard had never liked anyone. Okay, she wanted to marry Beast when she was younger, but that was different. She had never wanted to kiss someone or hold someone's hand. It's not that she thought it was gross or anything … she just had never thought of anyone like that. She figured when she got older, like her parents' age then she would … maybe.

Broder looked at Shepard and took a step closer to her. "Shepard … I wanted to tell you that … I, well, I really …" He had started looking at her lips and before he knew what he was doing he kissed her.

Shepard was caught off-guard and without thinking she pulled away and punched him in the face. It knocked him back and over his bike. As the bike came crashing down on him, Shepard realized what she did and hurried over to help him up, "Oh, frick! Broder!"

Pierce had heard the crash and came to the front door, opening the screen, "What happened?"

"Nothing daddy! Broder fell!" She answered as she realized that her hand was now throbbing. "Oh, crap! Broder I think my hand is broken."

"Really? I think my nose is broken." He said as he held his nose and sat on the curb. "Shit! I really think that you broke my nose!"

"I'm sorry!" Shepard said as she tried moving her fingers. "Why did you have to kiss me?"

"Shepard, can I see a doctor before we have this conversation?"

Shepard ran into the house where her mother was in the kitchen working on a sermon and her dad was just about to sit in his chair. "Uh, dad … Can you come outside?"

Pierce got up and walked out to the front with his daughter. "Can you take me and Broder to the hospital?" Shepard whispered.

"Why?"

"He kissed me."

Pierce confused by the request and pissed to hear that anyone kissed his daughter, looked over at Broder. "Why would that require a doctor?"

"I think I broke my hand and his nose." Shepard answered, holding her swollen hand up.

"Good." Pierce said without thinking, "He won't try that again."

"Daddy?"

"Huh?" Pierce realized that he had not just thought it but actually said it, "Uh, I said … well, uh … I'll get the keys but you have to tell the preacher. I can't hide this from her."

Shepard looked at her hand, back at her friend and then slowly walked back into the house. "Momma! Can we talk?"


	18. Oil & Water

"Mother … may we talk?" Liara was standing in front of the Matriarch after gathering up enough courage hoping that she would be allowed to approach her. Benezia looked at her daughter and just as she was about to wave her away, her sister caught her hand and leaned in, "Sister, please be kind. Liara is still young and it would hurt her to have you turn her away. She might be bright but in this … she does not understand."

Benezia looked at her sister about to remind her of the asari customs when Matriarch Livia placed a hand on her arm and pressed the point, "You would hurt her, daughter. You would hurt her and greatly displease me."

Benezia gave a slight bow of her head, looked back at Liara and then stood. "You may walk with me, daughter." As they made their way through the celebration, they did not speak. The two greeted other guests, making small talk with them as they moved towards Tatiaria's private courtyard. As they entered the secluded area, Benezia turned to look at her daughter. "What would you like to talk about, Liara?"

Now that Liara was with her mother in private her courage vanished and she remained silent. She wanted to ask her mother if she could come home. Beg her mother to forgive her. But instead she remained silent looking up into the Matriarch's eyes. Benezia saw that her daughter was struggling and finally turned away, walked over to a fountain in the center of the courtyard and watched the water spill down the sides. With her mother turned away, Liara found courage to at least speak, "How have you been, mother?"

_Small talk is it? Yes, this is how it must be … for now_. "I have been fine. And you daughter?"

Liara walked up next to her mother and traced the water with her finger, "I have been …" _miserable. I want to come home and be with you_. " … fine."

"So, we are both fine. That is good. I hear that you have been employed at the Thessia Guildhall."

"Yes, mother. You wouldn't believe how much data ... how many historical records they have on the protheans! Do you remember my theory on …"

"The protheans," the Matriarch sighed. _I must admit, I even miss your discussions on the protheans. No, not the discussions, but the way it makes you light up. The passion that it stirs in you and the excitement it causes_. "I read your paper on the Aethoyner dig … interesting."

"You read that?" Liara began to frown. "I must have wrote it wrong … the board rejected it. They said that … that …" _Yes, it must have been my fault. They wouldn't even consider my theory of the cycle of extinction_.

"No, daughter," Benezia turned to look in her daughter's eyes, "Your paper was very well-written and your theory is sound. If you were a matron with 400 years in the field, it would have been accepted and even debated in the great halls based off the evidence that you documented. But you must remember that you are young and others of greater years will let their own pride take offense and therefore not listen when you reveal a truth. You must learn how to present ideas that do not strip your peers and leaders of their own vanity."

"But mother, the data clearly showed …"

Benezia stepped closer to her young daughter, "Liara, page 36 had you discrediting Dr. Darius' interpretations of the ruins of Kalal … page 45 you put into question Professor Lorika's readings of the walls of Mindkir … page 66 …" Benezia could see Liara's head drop down, "Daughter," Benezia raised her head back up, "You must understand that new truths impact old truths and you must try and lessen the blow when your theories counter others … Even people with a strong intellect can have weak … well." Liara's head had dropped again and Benezia smiled. She gently raised her daughter's head yet again, looked deep into her eyes, "You must learn how to present your ideas while maintaining the dignity and therefore the respect of others. It's not enough to solve mysteries ... You must also be able to successfully share them, Liara."

Liara bowed her head yet again, "I am ashamed that I failed at presenting my theory in a manner that would convince others."

"No daughter, you did not fail," Benezia turned away from her daughter and looked at the fountain. "There has been positive feedback on your findings and I believe that it is your work on Aethoyner that gained you attention from the board on Thessia Guildhall."

"Thank you mother," Liara stepped next to her mother, looking at the fountain with her. "I do not want to disappoint you."

Benezia wanted to hug her daughter, encourage her but she needed to be careful. She could not just accept her daughter back with the creature still in her life. Liara needed to resolve that issue on her own without Benezia giving her a way out. At the moment custom would not allow it. _You must be able to make decisions completely on your own and learn that with every choice is a consequence. I cannot … no, I will not shield you from consequences that are of your own doing_. "Liara, you …"

"Oh, there you two are," Matriarch Livia declared. As the only surviving sister to Benezia's mother, she was considered the head of the family. "The procession should be starting soon, so Liara you need to start Sibila on the preparations."

"Thank you Theia." Liara bowed to both Matriarchs and left towards the pool. The two Matriarchs waited until they knew that she was out of the hearing range and sat on a bench overlooking the lovely garden and fountain.

"Are we repairing the breach?" Livia asked as she held her niece's hand.

"Not yet," Benezia sighed. "But soon I hope."

"Don't let it go for too much longer, daughter." Livia instructed.

"Thank you for your wise counsel, Theia," Benezia replied as she stood. "I will take your words into consideration. I assure you that I am doing everything within my powers to protect her."

Livia reached a hand up and Benezia took it as the asari of a millennium stood. "I have complete faith in you daughter. You have Dianthe ... your mother's gift of manipulation." Benezia would have been unimpressed if anyone else had said that to her, but coming from her aunt she knew that it was meant as a compliment. Her mother could guide anyone to her whim but she never used it for her own gain and had, in fact, led many asari away from ruin by her careful manipulations. Livia then cupped Benezia's face in her hand, "Just have this resolved within 4 chimes from now."

Benezia smiled then kissed her aunt on the forehead. The asari had many customs, some that bound their hands, which is where Benezia had found herself. Only a Matriarch of advanced years and wisdom could remove the restraint on Benezia, as this was just done. The elder of the two Matriarchs had just given Benezia the approval to drive the wedge between her daughter and the professor. The customs of courtship and family had been placed to ensure that relationships were not cut short without true reason. The mother … and mother only, could stop relationships but to ensure that the right decision was made the mother needed a Matriarch to give her the approval. As a Matriarch herself, Benezia required a Matriarch of greater years and learning. It helped temper action with wisdom. Asari valued wisdom gained through years over everything else.

* * *

"I'm nervous, Li-Li!" Sibila said as her cousin and Delana's four daughters draped the ceremonial sari of white and gold on her. Only Liara was given the honor of applying holy oils from Thessia and Zesmeni over her cousin's body after her majiga bath.

"Shh, you will be fine." Liara kissed her cheek and they both froze. "Sorry!" Liara giggled as another application of oil was now required on her cousin's cheek. Sibila had to be pure of touch prior to her entry into the sacred room of Athame, which is why the dressing was such a slow and arduous process. Once they had her dressed, the veil of Lusia was placed over her face and a wreath of denki and barbizi was adjusted just so to both hold the veil and to highlight the flowers of Sibila's home planet of Thessia and family city of Armali.

As everyone stood back to admire their work, Sibila looked at her cousin, "Do I look okay? Will mother be proud?"

Liara smiled, "You are lovelier than you have ever been and Theia will be so pleased."

The party walked out into the main courtyard, which had now been cleared, and there waited a litter of blue, gold and red. Four acolytes of Benezia, Shiala included, were waiting to lift Sibila and Liara and carry them to the temple of Athame in the city center of Armali. Liara helped her up, got her situated on the seat and then sat just in front of her at a level lower. Sibila excited brushed her cousin's cheek with her hand and they both giggled as Liara called for more oil to put on her cousin's hand. "I think I might need to keep this with us."

"You sure that will be enough?" Sibila joked.

Liara gave a little laugh as she placed the oil next to her. Then as the gate opened and the litter was lifted, Liara tossed a petal at Shiala who looked up at her, "Okay miss T'Soni! I can drop this if you keep that up." This caused both Liara and Sibila to laugh even harder. It was now time for the procession to the temple. The Cerelia Avenue was lined with flowers, singing, dancing and light revelry all along the way. The cousins could be heard giggling the whole way despite their nervousness of meeting the High Priestess and the ritual to be performed within.

* * *

Hours later and three asari stood looking at the tracks of water and oil leading from the serenity wall facing the courtyard entrance to the entryway of the home. The double doors were wide open with oil and water on the doors as well. The footprints of the two young asari lead even further into the home much to Tatiaria's horror.

"Those two …" Tatiaria started as Benezia touched her arm and raised a brow.

"Water beasts!" Delana laughed as her four daughters entered the courtyard, shaking their heads and laughing.

Tatiaria sighed then directed the four daughters to get rags as she headed towards Sibila's room scolding her and Liara even before she was in earshot of them. Delana was still laughing as Benezia stepped closer to her. "Delana, it has come to my attention that your company located a cache of prothean discs of late."

Delana looked at Benezia, shocked. "How did you know?"

"Does it matter?" Benezia smiled. No matter how many years that Antonina Delana was with Tatiaria she was always surprised at the information the two T'Soni sisters could acquire. "I need a favor, a very quiet favor."

Benezia had never required anything from Delana and having her need her services, no matter how small, was considered an honor. "Of course."

"You have a science lab on Illium," Delana nodded, surprised that Benezia knew about this secret lab of her company as well. _Not even Tatiaria knows about our research there, how does she get this information?_ "I need your company to request a researcher from Thessia Guildhall to come and assist on these discs."

"The discs are located on Rannadril where we are set to review them with a team of four. I don't see…"

Benezia stepped closer and looked Delana in the eyes, "You will have those discs and researchers flown to Nos Astra. You can set up a research facility there at my expense if you do not want to reveal the current lab. Then you will make a request to Thessia Guildhall requesting a researcher … a master researcher to assist your team in deciphering the discs."

Delana realized what Benezia was really requesting and smiled, "No, I'll have an area set up here at Armali instead. I can use that company for this … this little duplicitous act of yours."

"Armali?" Benezia stood back and laughed. "Yes, I heard about your little acquisition ... or should I say my sister's?"

Delana smiled, "I've wanted to have controlling interest of that company for years. Of course, Tatiaria on paper has complete control. Your sister's plan, your sister's rules. I would not want to be the person trying to take on either of you."

Benezia laughed even louder. "No ... The research must take place in Nos Astra. Can you do that?"

Delana looked at the Matriarch, "It would be my honor."

* * *

Liara was so lost in her research that she didn't hear Nicia saying her name or notice when she sat down next to her. Slowly, Liara started to hear Nicia, as if she was coming up out of water, and looked up to see her smiling at her and carrying a data disc.

"What is that?" Liara asked.

"I thought that you could help me look at the estates for sale," Nicia said as she ejected the disc currently in Liara's netpad and inserted her disc.

"Why would I do that?" Liara asked a little irritated at being interrupted during her research.

"Well," Nicia began as she pressed her exposed leg against Liara, "I am hoping that we can have a place before Janiris." Liara regretted having agreed to purchase a place. Nicia had been screaming about Liara attending her cousin's celebration without her and Liara had offered purchasing a place to just calm her down. As soon as she said it she had regretted her promise. The frugal nature in her had shuddered at what this might cost her. Now, after being informed that her services were required on Illium, she was relieved. She wasn't crazy about leaving Thessia but it meant her way out of Nicia's grasp.

As Nicia placed her hand on Liara's hand, she quickly got up from the table, ejected the disc and collected her things, "I have to be going Nicia."

"What?" Nicia followed after her, leaving the disc on the table.

Liara almost bumped into another researcher as she headed for the balcony. She really needed air. As she reached the balcony she began to feel better as she took deep breaths. She could hear Nicia behind her talking about what life in their new high end estate would be like, how they would be the envy and most importantly, how it would show the Matriarch how well they were doing. All Liara wanted was to be left alone to do her research.

"Stop acting like a child Liara," she heard her say. "I'll need your signature and funds on our new home."

Liara took a deep breath and then turned to Nicia, "I have to go to Nos Astra for a couple years or even more. There are prothean discs that need deciphering."

"What?" Nici almost shouted. "You can't!" Nicia took a breath, then slid the items out of Liara's arms, placing them on the balcony ledge and put her arms around her, "Just think, erotas ... Professor Nicia T'Lemk & Dr. Liara T'soni 's Estate! Everyone would want an invite to one of our gatherings."

Liara looked around, feeling a little closed in. "Nicia, I was thinking that we might want to take a small time away from each other. I'll be away for at least two years and I know that you want to … to … well, you are a matron. Off-spring-"

Nicia's eyes narrowed, "I do not want off-spring at this very moment. What I want is for us to get an estate, preferably near the Matriarch in Politia … With your mother's prestige and my academic excellence-"

Liara felt light headed but decided to push farther, "Nicia, I just think that it would be better-"

"Better?" Nicia pulled Liara even closer, "You think that you will find someone better than me? Never mind that I am destined for greater things, I care for you despite … well … others would just see you as a pureblood."

Liara felt stung at that word, _pureblood_. She had heard people whisper it about her but she had never had someone say it directly to her face, "Why would you say that?" Liara pushed Nicia away and turned away from her.

Nicia tried to get Liara to face her, but Liara pushed her away. "You know I didn't mean anything by it. Just that there are a lot of others who wouldn't think of living with you because of … Well. Only I could really care for you. You must know that."

Liara felt her face begin to heat, tears begging to fall ... "You are right. I would be a potential liability for you, Nicia. I think that you need someone else," Liara said as she went to leave.

Nicia grabbed her by the arm and whispered, "I am the best thing you will ever get, Liara. Are you sure that you want to pass up this opportunity? Are you sure that you want to throw your life with me away?"

Liara looked at Nicia and saw the desperation in her eyes, the absolute need for her to fall in line. Liara gently removed Nicia's hand from her arm, "I am not ready to be with anyone at this time."

Nicia, hurt and angry, slapped Liara and cursed her. She spit venom, trying to harm the maiden. But as all asari knew, a matron taking a maiden as a true mate was making one of the biggest mistakes that they could make. Each was in a different phase, a different place both emotionally and mentally. While the matron wanted to settle down and create a home with off-spring, the maiden was restless and wanted to roam. As Liara walked away Nicia fought the bitter tears of losing her connection to Liara. As she watched the young asari walk away she realized that she had felt more than she realized and that the Matriarch and their lifestyle wasn't what she was really hurting for.

The words that Nicia had stabbed at Liara fell on a empty space, while the slap caught Liara off-guard. She didn't ... no, she couldn't understand the pain that Nicia was feeling. While the word _pureblood_ made Liara feel shame, all the rest meant nothing. The connection that the matron had felt was a mystery to the maiden. As Liara walked away, Nicia was hurting while Liara's mind was already on Illium.


	19. Music Appreciation

The flight, as a precaution, had been re-routed to Nos Astra, Illium due to the batarian attacks that had just occurred in both the Zelene and Tasale systems. The attacks were brutal and fourteen shuttles were lost over a 3 hour time frame, resulting in all flights in the Crescent Nebula being placed on high alert. The family was returning from Earth, where Shepard had just celebrated her 16th birthday in Georgia. They had spent a month with Pierce's parents and the family had enjoyed the time away. Hannah had spent her time with Pierce's sister Melanie shopping in Savannah, Shepard ran around the beach with her two cousins, Aaron and Timmy, while Pierce spent time with his parents, older sister and her husband.

The only blot on the vacation was when Shepard, while racing her cousin Aaron on a motorcycle, hit a stray dog. Shepard called her dad in a panic and when Pierce and his brother-in-law arrived they saw that the animal was dying. Pierce went back to his dad's truck, pulled out the rifle and Shepard, seeing him about to kill the animal, begged him, "Please dad, don't kill him! Please? Can't we fix this?"

Pierce looked at his daughter and pulled her to the side, "Eli, this animal is dying. There is nothing that we can do but put it down."

"Daddy, please don't kill it. I bet momma could help it."

"Eli, look at it." Both father and daughter looked at the creature crying out in pain, "That animal is going to die. Do you want to continue to let it suffer? Or do you want us to do the humane thing and put it down? If I was in that much pain and there was nothing anyone could do to save me … I would pray that my pain, my suffering would end quickly."

As Shepard looked at the suffering animal she knew that her father was right. She nodded her head and turned away as the sound of the rifle shot filled the air. The sounds of the suffering dog silenced, Shepard walked over to it, looked at it and hung her head. Shepard had gone hunting many times, killed animals for food but this animal died because she was reckless. Because she did not pay attention. Because she was thinking only of herself. She looked at the dead dog, tears racing down her face, "I'm so sorry."

Pierce, hearing her words hugged her. "Okay, Eli. It's okay."

"No dad! I killed that dog, I did! If I hadn't been careless …" Shepard continued to cry and Pierce just held his daughter. He knew that Hannah could take this event and use it as a life lesson; she would not only teach Shepard but calm her. She was good at those things. Pierce, not so much. As Aaron tried to calm his cousin by saying that the dog would have a good burial, Pierce hugged his daughter tighter and whispered, "Let's go see preacher woman, okay?"

By the end of that month, Pierce had actually found he did not want to leave this time and had contemplated putting their trip home on hold. The morning of the flight Pierce had gotten up early to spend extra time with his mother. She was in the kitchen, putting on a pot of coffee, "Good morning son."

"Mornin' mom," he had greeted as he sat down at the kitchen table looking out at where the Atlantic ran up against the backyard. "You know the river that runs behind our house on Mindoir? It has risen and there has been an increase in those big teeth horse fish."

"I don't trust those things!" Elizabeth shook remembering the first time that she had seen them. "I can't believe that your father, Hannah and Lil'bit can swim in that river with those things! Things with those kind of teeth are bound to eat you. Or at least take a leg or two."

"Right?" Pierce was glad that he wasn't the only one with sense. "You wouldn't catch me in that water! Not Hannah and Eli, they love swimming out there. Hell, Eli and her friends, Ricky and Tyler, built a dock and they now dive off it all the time. Sometimes they dive right next to one of those things. Eli has even grabbed a hold of one and swam off with it, laughing! I'd be laughing alright … hysterically laughing. No wait, just hysterically … hysterical?" Once the coffee was ready, Elizabeth poured her and her son a cup. "Thanks mom."

"I wish that you weren't leaving today." She said as she sat next to him. "Can't you, Hannah and Lil'bit stay longer? A month just doesn't seem long enough, Pierce. You know that your father and I won't be able to travel out there until after the new year. Can't you put in a call with your job and get an extension?"

Pierce looked at his coffee, "Mom, I wish I could. I've really enjoyed this visit …" His mother looked at him with a questioning look, "Not that I've not always loved being here, but this time, hell I've realized how much we are missing. Toni's boys, like Eli are getting bigger and you and dad are getting up in the years-"

"You mean your father is." Elizabeth cocked an eye, "I am getting younger. Hannah said that and that woman is not prone to lying."

Pierce stopped the coffee cup short to his lips, "No, preacher woman is right. You are looking a wee younger." His mother lightly slapped him on the arm. "Ouch! Thanks mom."

Jack came into the kitchen, wearing only underwear and rubbing his stomach, "Coffee?" he growled. Hannah rolled her eyes, got up and made him a cup as she chided him for coming in the kitchen half-naked with Hannah and their granddaughter being there. This was performed every morning while they were there and it never stopped making Pierce or Shepard laugh. The one time that Hannah was actually in the kitchen Jack quickly backed out, cutting his and Elizabeth's act short. "You're not gone yet?" He feigned disgust.

"We can leave right now if you like," Pierce joked.

"Naw, drink your coffee first," Jack said as he kissed his wife on the cheek and waited as she poured him a cup. "Morning doll!"

"Jack, I swear," Elizabeth handed the cup as he rubbed her behind.

"Sonny, make sure that the kid comes and says goodbye to her hero … her real hero." Elizabeth rolled her eyes as she watched her husband, dressed only in underwear; walk out the back door to his work shop.

"You know he's never been right," Pierce noted as he listened to his father whistling as he unlocked the shop.

"From the day that I met him," Elizabeth agreed as she refilled both their cups and then sat down.

"You know mom, Eli is getting bigger … 16 years old. I'm beginning to wonder if living off-world is really good for her."

"Lil'bit is smart, kind and overall a very good girl. I think that Hannah has done an amazing job on her … on both of you." His mother smiled.

Pierce gave a quick pout then grinned, "I don't know what I would do without her. She changed my life and then gave me Eli as an extra added bonus." His mother touched his chin. "Where have the years gone, mom?"

Elizabeth laughed, "I ask that myself when I look at you, Toni and Mel."

Just then they heard his sister enter through the front door, Pierce continued to look at his mother smiling and said just a little louder, "Well, Mel and I still look young … but that Toni! Whew, she looks old!" Both mother and son laughed as Toni peeked in.

"Ha! Ha! Pee-Pee!" She said. "I thought I would pop in and say goodbye on my way to work." Pierce got up and hugged her. He had said goodbye countless of times but he didn't want to let her go. "Hey lil' brother, don't make me think you actually care." She joked as her brother continued to hug her tight.

"Pierce, I'm sure that your father could get you a job here or even in Savannah. As the retired fire chief that man has contacts. Toni, Mel and I were talking about how great it would be if you were here full-time."

"Mom, we are trying to get rid of him, not keep him!" Toni laughed. They kissed and as Toni re-filled her traveling mug with coffee, Pierce slapped her on the ass.

"You know that you can't live without me old woman!" He teased as he sat back down.

As she finished pouring, she turned around squinting her eyes, "Listen here you moron, I am still as slender, seductive and fertile … yes, I said it … fer-TI-le as a 20 year old! So stop trying to mess with my brilliant mind."

"Okay, okay!" Pierce said as he held up both hands in surrender, "You are a woman of 20!"

"Now that you two have made up," their mother said, "We would really like you to think about staying. We not only worry about you out in the Terminus, but it is so far and we miss you."

"Maybe I can …" Just then his daughter came into the kitchen, rubbing her eyes and yawning.

"Good morning, Shepards!" She kissed her grandmother and aunt, and then playfully punched her dad lightly on the arm.

"Hey kiddo!" Toni joked, "I'm glad to know that this old guy has someone to punch on him when I'm not around!"

Shepard smiled and then made a cup of coffee for her mother and winked on her way out, "See you Aunt Toni, I gotta give mom her wake-up juice."

After Shepard had left the kitchen, Pierce shook his head, "No, I can't do that to her. That kid has her own personal entourage and Mindoir is her home."

"She would make friends here, Pierce." Elizabeth said. "Earth has so much more opportunities for her … Just say the word. Your dad can get you a job, your sister can help Hannah find a place … you could even move into Savannah if you want."

Pierce wanted to come home, he wasn't sure why but something was trying to pull him back. Instead he thought of Hannah's church and his daughter's friends … hell, even he had a life there. Why was he thinking of leaving Mindoir. _Must be getting old!_ "Maybe in the future mom. You know, when Eli starts attending college here on Earth."

"Coward!" Toni hugged her brother, found Hannah and Shepard kissing them goodbye and then left for work.

Elizabeth got up to pour both her and her son another cup, "Has Lil'bit decided yet on the college?"

Pierce whistled, "A place that will break the bank … You know that she wants to attend Harvard?"

"Harvard?" Elizabeth was stunned. The last she knew was that her namesake wanted to become a ballerina. "Pierce, where would you and Hannah get the money for that?"

"I was thinking of prostituting myself and Hannah could start leading a cult that takes all of her followers' monies."

Elizabeth put down her coffee, "Okay smart ass!"

"I don't know, mom. But Hannah and I will figure something out. She wants to be a medical doctor." Pierce smiled. "Crazy huh? My kid a doctor!"

Hours later as the family said goodbye to each other, Pierce felt a knot in his stomach that he had never felt before. He had even looked back at them, fighting the urge to stop and stay. _I love you_ he had mouthed to his mother just as he was about to step out of sight, his mother tearing up.

Now here it was, the family had been diverted to Nos Astra on Illium, docked safely and released to the port with a requirement to stay close to their gate. The passengers were going to be put up in a hotel for the night and the arrangements were being made. How long they were going to stay on Illium was dependent on when the passageway was cleared.

"Hey dad," Shepard was looking through her travel bag, "do you think the Gnats beat the Travelers?"

Pierce smiled, "Of course they did!"

Now that they were safely tucked away on Illium, Pierce was able to smile and joke. The trip had started smooth but as they entered the Crescent Nebula the atmosphere changed. Reports started coming in that shuttles were being attacked and as the numbers increased the passengers began to worry. Pierce had been watching his daughter play her Doom X game as Hannah read her Bible when word spread through the cabin that two more shuttles in their area had just been captured by the batarians. Pierce felt his stomach tighten and in trying to not let his daughter or wife see that he was scared looked out the window for raiders.

Shepard put her game down and whispered to her mother "Momma, I'm scared. Are we gonna be okay?"

Hannah leaned towards her daughter, "Elizabeth, that's in God's hands. He knows what is best and we must have faith. Don't worry."

Shepard sat for a minute holding her game and then leaned into her mother, "Maybe God is on vacation."

Hannah chuckled, looked at her daughter, "God doesn't take vacations. Besides, I am here and I won't let anything bad happen to you. I promise ma petite chou."

As a fellow passenger and her two young daughters began to cry, Hannah placed her Bible on Shepard's lap, got up, went over and introduced herself. Shepard and Pierce watched Hannah smile, whisper words of comfort and ultimately calm the family of three. "I love your mother," Pierce whispered to his daughter. "Do you think she would marry me?" Shepard pushed her dad and smiled.

Both Shepard and Pierce admired Hannah's ability to not only lead but calm people as well. As Hannah returned to her seat, Shepard was proud to have everyone see that she was with her. If Shepard could have, she would have stood and said "This is my mom … mine!" But Shepard also felt that her mother had to be at least a little afraid. Hannah sat, took back her book and calmly began reading again. Shepard tried playing her game, but when word ran through the cabin that another shuttle not too far away from them had just been attacked, Shepard leaned back into her mother, "Momma, you gotta afraid."

Hannah put down her Bible, looked at her daughter, kissed her on the lips and smiled, "Baby, it's not about me. Look around us, see how everyone is afraid?" Shepard saw the fear and nodded, "Now, you can either join them in their fear or you can offer hope. Am I afraid? Of course, I'm human after all. But I must focus outside of me, not think of myself but others. Do you want to help others? Be the one that they look to for comfort? Inspire them to be stronger?"

"I want to be like you, momma." Shepard said as she looked at her mother's beautiful face.

Hannah smiled and hugged her daughter, "You are much more special than I will ever be, Elizabeth. I have complete faith in you and what you will do when you grow up. Now, I challenge you to think of others, to look outside of yourself and be a beacon of light when everything seems dark. Vous comprenez?"

"Oui, ma mère," Shepard answered as she pulled away from her mother. She knew that she would never be as good, as kind, as pure or as inspirational as Hannah Shepard. _No momma, I'll never be as amazing as you_.

Shepard found her game in her bag and pulled it out as she heard laughter. She looked up at the walkway in the port and saw two asari laughing as they walked by. Shepard upon seeing them remembered how Ricky had told her that the asari were tall and now looking at them ... these two were at least her dad's height of 6'2" ... "Holy shitjuana! Dad, look!"

Pierce looked up to see semi-clad asari and then quickly looked at preacher woman. She was talking to one of the port authorities about how long it would be before they had a room and the current status of the attacks. "Eli, I think that we might need to play your game."

Shepard laughed at her dad, "Don't want momma seeing you looking at naked women?"

Pierce looked back as more asari passed by their gate area, "They aren't naked. But, yeh … I'm afraid that your momma might think I'm being lustful. Show me how to play your game."

"Okay," Shepard looked out at the passing asari, "Ricky will shit when I tell him about this trip. I wonder if I should take a picture."

"You will not take a picture, young lady." Hannah shook her head, "These are people not animals and you will not act like they are here just for your entertainment."

Shepard looked at her mother, "I'm sorry mom. I didn't mean to … aw, I was just joking."

Hannah lifted Shepard's chin and looked into her eyes, "No joking about others. They may look different but they have souls, they have feelings and they may even have hearing that catches all of your ignorant statements. I will not have a rude or insensitive daughter."

"Mom, I said I'm sorry. At least I'm not checking out their breasts like dad!" Shepard knew that she had just thrown her pops under the bus, but she hated being caught in Hannah's disapproving stare. Hannah looked at her husband while Shepard muttered under her breath, "Sorry dad."

"What? Breasts? Why I … Look Hannah, isn't this a beautiful place?" He turned and looked out over the city lights of Nos Astra. "Ahhh, what an architecturally inspiring place." Hannah shook her head at her two companions and walked over to her husband.

She put her arm through his, placed her head on his shoulder and whispered, "Well, I can't fault you for that. They are more firm and pleasing then mine are. Almost 50 years this body has lived and that can be hard on breasts."

Pierce bent his head and kissed the top of her head, "Are you kidding me? There is no other set of breasts that I love seeing more. Besides, blue breasts would seem a little … well, a little like being with a dead person."

Shepard stood at the entryway to her gate and watched the scantily-clad asari passing. _Ricky is gonna be so jealous!_ She even saw two salarians and three turians. _I wish I could sneak one picture, but if mom found out! Nope, be good._ As she stood there she was fascinated at how they moved around each other. She then realized how they seemed to move in time with the music that was playing, music that she had never heard before. It was beautiful yet sad, even tormented. Shepard saw an asari with a pleasant face walking towards her and she really wanted to know what music was playing. _What could be the harm?_ "Excuse me."

The asari smiled at Shepard as she approached ... Shepard was still 2" shy of her final grown up height of 5'8" and this asari towered over her at 6'3" ... add on her 3" heels and she was a foot taller. _Yep, Rickster, you sure weren't lying. They are tall._ The asari said something to Shepard but she didn't understand her. The asari realized that this human either did not have a translator or the galactic asari language installed so she converted to the galactic Anglish that she had learned from one of her human lovers, "How can I help you?"

"Can you tell me what this music is?" Shepard asked.

"Do you like this?" The asari seemed surprised.

"Yes," Shepard responded.

"I've never known a human to understand … much less like our composer Akdhat. Well, actually I find your kind more sexually interested in us."

"Sorry?" Shepard took a small step back as she hoped that she had misunderstood the asari.

"Oh, is that what this is? Another hit up line? Do you find me attractive?" The asari smiled as she stepped closer.

"Uh, hit up line?" Shepard looked back at her parents, lost for words as the asari stepped even closer.

"You do have pretty lips and I love your eyes. Green? Beautiful." The asari looked Shepard up and down, "Long legs, strong arms, breasts full … Yes, we can pleasure each other."

Shepard took a big step back, confused. "I'm sorry? I … I just wanted to know the song. It is sad but beautiful … the instruments … I uh-"

The asari, realizing that the human was being genuine in her interaction, apologized. "Forgive me, I am not used to humans not focused on …" The asari's eyes seemed to come alive, "How marvelous! A human interested in our culture over our bed. Hmm, my cousin should you meet you. She not only might like you but this is her favorite piece … this is called "EtZev". It is a tragic love story of our people. She … my cousin, is just over there. Would you like to meet her?"

"No thank you, I have to stay here." Shepard fought the urge to call her mom over, "Can I purchase this on Qtunes?" Shepard asked, a little careful to not get too close to her.

"Qtunes? I don't know what that is. But you can purchase it in any shop with a musicpost." She answered, "I can take you if you want. I have time and you are really quite delicious. You sure I can't introduce you to my cousin, you might like her. She isn't into humans but I think that she might find you interested. A human that actually likes our composer Akdhat. "

Shepard was regretting she had stopped the asari. She looked back at her parents who were still facing the view and took a deep breath_, just act naturally_, "No thank you. Like I said, I have to stay right here … I just wanted to know what this was. I'm sorry for disturbing you."

"Don't be silly," The asari said. "If you do purchase it, get it by NovaGrecia … that is the best version."

"Thank you." Shepard smiled and the asari gave a slight bow. Shepard returned to her bag, took out her netbook and once on typed _Akdat Ezav Nova Gresia_ and next to it _asari sex stay away_.

Pierce came up behind her, "What was that? Throwing me under the bus?"

Shepard slowly turned around, grinning, "Sorry. I panicked. You know how mom can get that look and I panicked."

Pierce laughed, "Well, I am sure that I will return the favor! Now before you and I get into trouble, show me how to play your Dung."

"Doom!" Shepard punched him on the shoulder. "Let me turn it on." Pierce looked at his daughter's game and tried to play, getting killed within the first 5 minutes, Shepard laughed and started trying to show him how to play it. "Dad, stop facing the walls … no, turn him … Dad! You are shooting the chair!"

"Eli, I'm trying. Wha? Who just killed me?" Shepard started laughing as Hannah put her bag under Shepard's chair.

"Elizabeth, don't move. My purse is under you."

Pierce looked at his wife, "Where are you going?"

"I need tea or coffee. Do you two want something?"

Shepard, without looking up, shook her head no and Pierce said, "Oh, coffee if you find any."

"Uh, mom," Shepard looked up worried, "Don't talk to any asari."

"What?" Hannah looked at her daughter disapproving, "Elizabeth don't be like that. All creatures, great and small, belong to God ... along with you my little troublesome creature."

Shepard thought of the conversation that she just had, thought of her mother being hit on and the thought made her cringe but it also made her laugh. The idea of her mother being hit on by an asari ... "You're right mom. Say hi to the asari and ask them about their music while you are at it." Shepard grinned.

Hannah smiled suspiciously at her daughter then walked out of their sitting area and looked around and couldn't believe her luck. Just a few feet in front of their gate was a place with the sign Kaffee over it.


	20. Kaffee Romantica

As Liara waited in line at the Kaffee shop, she debated on whether or not to cancel her flight back to Thessia and just have them send her images of the statue. She was scheduled to spend a few months back at the Thessia Guildhall in Serrice studying a statue that had been found on an off-world deep in asari space. No one could determine if it was truly prothean and Professor Lorika had suggested sending for young Dr. T'Soni. She felt that Liara might see something in the small intricate scratches at the base and help determine its true history. Sibila was not happy that her cousin was leaving for a few months and had demanded taking her to the port. They had chatted as Liara's flight kept getting delayed due to the batarian attacks and after waiting an extra three hours, Liara finally sent Sibila on her way.

As Sibila kissed her and walked off, Liara took a few deep breaths and then looked for a Kaffee shop. Maybe if she just purchased a nice hot cup of Illium Kaffee ... not as tasteful as Thessian Kaffee but good nonetheless ... and then find a nice comfortable place to relax near her gate. As she waited in line, the sound of "EtZev" spilled everywhere and Liara closed her eyes and swayed slightly to the loneliness of the winds as she thanked Athame for her blessings. The past two years had been wonderful for Liara and even as the music conveyed utter loneliness Liara couldn't stop smiling and being grateful.

* * *

The Matriarch had escorted Liara to Nos Astra and they stayed at the nine-star hotel Opaque in the theater district. The Matriarch had come to help Liara pick, purchase and decorate a place of residence ... Liara had wanted somewhere near the ConteX Labs but the Matriarch had chosen the exclusive area of Elis. This area was home to many young asari from the Corallium Circle so security was high and the area well-protected. The Matriarch then chose the Gattic Tower which was not only heavily secured but managed through a company that Matriarch Aethyta owned. Aethyta had left Thessia and moved to Illium after struggling for years to make her peers see that the asari needed to move away from focusing on galactic unity and start building their own armies, strengthening their own defenses and building mass relays. She now was heavily in real estate on the planet Illium and owned four nightclubs and two restaurants. She had a home north of the city with a view of the Aminge Sea and when the Matriarch arrived to see her there she was shocked. Benezia informed her that Liara was there, would be purchasing an apartment in one of her buildings and that if anything happened to her ... well, she would hold Aethyta responsible.

"Why me?" Aethyta was dumbfounded.

"Because you are here," Benezia told her as she looked out at the sea.

Aethyta walked next to her, "It reminds me of Messonia ... remember the night that we made Liara?"

Benezia remembered, "Aethyta, promise that you will keep an eye on her ... I'm not asking that you stalk her. Just check in now and again."

Aethyta put her hand on Benezia's waist, "Nezzy ... don't smother her. I'm sure that Liara will get along fine."

Benezia pushed her away, "If anything happens ..."

"Okay," Aethyta knew that when Benezia got something in her head there was no changing her mind. "If you want you can have your pick of any of the apartments ... no charge."

"No, I do not require that."

"Look, the kid is mine too." Aethyta wanted to touch Benezia, "Just let me do this."

Benezia could see that Aethyta wanted her and her mind wandered to the times that they had touched but ... no. She had been down that path before and knew that it would never work between them ... "All I ask is that you keep an eye on her. Just don't tell her who you are if you meet."

"Fine." Aethyta wanting to keep Benezia from leaving asked, "So ... what is she like?"

"She is a wonder ... smart ... curious ... stubborn."

Aethyta laughed, "She's like you! That's good, Nezzy ... I'd hate for her to be like me."

Benezia thought of the sketches that Liara had made of the same tree on the T'Soni plantation that Aethyta had and she smiled, "She is artistic." _and I sense jealousy in her_, Benezia had also thought but did not say.

Aethyta smiled, "Yeah? Well, shit."

"Hm-mm. She painted the same tree that you did for me all those years ago on Lusia." Benezia remembering those times moved closer to Aethyta and put her hand on her cheek. "You remember that tree?"

How could Aethyta forget. That was where they had first touched ... first kissed. "Was her sketch close to mine?"

Liara's had been light of touch while Aethyta's was harder, more cutting but Benezia nodded, "She has your gift."

"Well kick my quads!" Aethyta grinned. "I told you ... just as much mine."

Benezia didn't agree but she just smiled as she kissed Aethyta, "Watch over her for me while she is here."

Aethyta nodded and Benezia smiled ... she always got her way.

* * *

The apartment finally chosen was a one-bedroom in the Gattic Tower and the Matriarch and Liara had gone rounds over the money that it would cost to purchase and renovate the place. Liara was even tighter with her finances than her mother and she kept telling her that she could purchased a two bedroom apartment closer to her job at six times less the cost. "And mother, it's only a one-bedroom! If you come to visit I want you to stay with me."

Benezia looked at the high ceilings and had suggested adding a loft over the kitchen, "Then you could have your bed face those gorgeous windows, Liara." Liara had loved the idea but she could not get past the cost. The Matriarch, realizing that her stubborn daughter was not going to spend that much money, finally gave in and purchased the place for her as an early birthday gift. Then she hired the asari architect Luminisia and both her and Liara were amazed and greatly pleased when they saw the finished product. It had been Liara's idea for the large aquarium behind her bed and Benezia's idea for the doors to the new master bath and closets to be undetectable on the walls.

It had been heaven having her mother for those six months all to herself ... They decorated her place together, went shopping, tried the local restaurants, saw plays, heard the symphony, attended temple ... Benezia even taught Liara a few dishes to cook that were easy. Liara had grown up never needing to learn and had over the years through sheer necessity made a few dishes for when she was on dig sites that had no cooks attached ... but she would not have made a meal for someone else. No. She knew that she could not cook. So Benezia had shown her some basic dishes that would not require too much skill. The last week that the Matriarch was there, Liara had purchased a Pegasus skybike to get her around and she had taken her mother for a ride. They had both laughed as she carefully moved through traffic. As Benezia finally left Liara had cried and her cousin Sibila had come over to comfort her.

As she settled into her single life, Liara loved turning off all the lights of the apartment and lying on her bed, looking out at the city lights as music by Akdhat softly floated throughout the home. She was glad that her mother had purchased and had the space redesigned for her ... She had loved the new kitchen as well but she knew that it would see more takeaway meals then home-cooked.

The research at the ConteX Labs an hour from her home had been amazing and that was not just because of the artifacts but also working with a team of people just as curious and hungry about the protheans as herself. They were a curious, intelligent, aspiring, mature and work-oriented team. The discs had been hard to decipher but the team felt that they were close and in a few more years the new code would certainly be broken by this team of 2 salarians and 3 asari.

After a few months, Liara had a set routine. She would rise early, spend an hour performing positions of Anskrit, then head to the local fitness center, Athenka Gym, for a couple hours of workout ... then she would rush to work and stay late in the evening. Favorite restaurants were frequented and Liara had even been shown by one of her salarian co-workers, Zazzy, a small bar called "Skybase" close to their work that had big screens showing only skyball games. Other than protheans, this was still Liara's other obsession. It always surprised others to learn that Liara loved skyball, both to play and watch, but she did. If she wasn't playing on a local team she was catching games. She and Zazzy were at the "Skybase" bar at least three times a week to catch a game. Whenever it was the Serrice Delphinus Skyball team playing the two would put on their Delphinus jerseys and meet there to cheer on their favorite team. You could hear these two hollering and cheering even from the street. Liara missed being in the T'Soni box seats at the actual stadium but this was second best as her and Zazzy would share a meal, drink elasa and argue over which player would rank highest in the game.

On weekends when she pulled her nose out of research, she would attend temple, play her favorite Akdhat pieces on her onai ... she was even trying to learn that pretty little human piece ... paint on her balcony, write her mother, play skyball with the ConteX Labs team at the Nostro park where she would also play a human game called chess with Zazzy that he loved and had taught her. Her life was full and all she was missing was her mother being closer ... but the Matriarch came out every other month while she had her cousin Sibila in an apartment just two buildings down. They would meet at a sitruuna house, go dancing in a nightclub or have a meal in one of their favorite restaurants. Outside of the sitruuna house, Sibila would almost always have one of her lovers with her and on occasion a "blind-date" for her cousin. Liara would just suffer through those dates although there had been a few asari that she had taken home and experimented with. Sibila would always roll her eyes when Liara all but ignored a turian date, "Liara, you should try a turian. Try something other than an asari ... anything!" But Liara would just shake her head no in disgust at the thought.

A few months after Liara had moved to Nos Astra, Eveline Dellis had been offered and accepted a position with the Armali Council and was placed in their Nos Astra office. Eveline was surprised that she had been offered a position as an entry-level manager, but her mother was not only an executive at Armali Council ... she was a close friend of Tatiaria T'Soni, the major shareholder. Evie had temporarily stayed with Sibila and after Liara and Evie saw each other a few times at the apartment, they quickly became occasional lovers. Liara found being with another asari maiden wonderful since there was a sense of freedom, an easy exploration of each other physically and no commitment or expectation of a future. For Liara that was another reason to smile, no talk of commitments, off-spring or the dreaded M word! Yes, life was good on Illium.

* * *

Liara could smell the wonderful aroma of the Kaffee and as she took her cup, still thinking of how pleasing life had been, she turned around and bumped into the human standing directly behind her. Her Kaffee spilled on the human and Liara was mortified. "I am so sorry." The female human pulled her dress from her skin trying to keep the hot liquid from burning her. Liara seeing a washroom just to their right, carefully guided the human inside where she began wiping the dress with cold towels. "Please forgive me, I didn't realize …"

"No, it's my fault." The human said as she looked down at her dress. "I was standing too close."

Liara grabbed another towel and continued to wipe the dress, "No ... please, it was mine. The Kaffee looks like it won't stain your dress."

"Well, it's an old dress so if it does it won't be a tragedy." The woman calmed Liara and as she grabbed her by the wrist to stop her from wiping her, Liara was amazed at how warm she was. "Please, it really is okay. I think my dress will survive."

"My, you are hot." Liara said without thinking. This was the first time that she had seen a human up close like this or ever talked with one. Her voice was soft and slightly deeper than other females that Liara had heard. So many female humans had high-pitched voices that hearing her voice was relaxing and pleasant to Liara.

"Sorry?" The woman looked up at Liara, who standing at 6' 2" in sandals was 5" taller than her.

"I'm sorry! I meant that your skin … you are hot." Liara put her hand to her head embarrassed. "Oh, by the Goddess! I mean you feel …"

The woman laughed, "Well, thank you. You are quite cold to the touch, no wonder you wanted a cup of coffee. Unfortunately my dress, it seems, wanted it more than you."

Liara gave a little giggle and as they continued tackling the front of her dress, Liara embarrassed at her own carelessness offered to pay for the dress. "You can bill me … My name is Liara T'soni of Armali, Thessia."

The woman smiled, "It's nice to meet you Liara T'Soni. I'm Hannah Shepard ... I'm on my way home to Mindoir ... but please just call me Hannah."

"Please forgive me Hannah." Liara said as they finished drying the dress.

Liara then asked Hannah why she was in line for Kaffee and not her asari friend. "Asari friend?" Hannah questioned.

"Yes." Liara looked at Hannah, "You weren't buying the Kaffee for yourself were you?"

"Well, yes." Hannah was confused. "I wanted coffee for my husband and me."

"Coffee?" Liara stopped, "Oh yes, the human drink. Oh … well, now I am glad that we had this little accident." Liara smiled as Hannah looked confused. "I believe that there is a coffee stand just a few steps to the left of the Kaffee stand. As a human you may want to avoid Kaffee."

Hannah flattening down her dress asked, "Would it hurt us?"

"Hurt? No …" Liara wasn't sure how to properly say what it would do to humans given that Kaffee, while it relaxed the asari, had been found to stimulate the humans. But not just stimulate them. It put their sexual drive in high and if they drank just a little too much it could make them sexually aggressive. As a result, many asari establishments would not sell Kaffee to humans. Nos Astra however would sell anything to anyone. "Kaffee has been found to over stimulate humans."

Hannah appeared confused for just a second and then looked embarrassed. "Oh, that would not do. Our daughter is with us and … well, thank you for the information. Now I am really thankful for meeting you." Hannah and Liara smiled at each other as they walked back into the main pedway of the port.

Just then a human male appeared, "Hannah, I wondered where you went. I got our coffee and Eli should probably eat. You know how she can forget to eat or sleep if she is sidetracked and right now she is lost in Doom. You should see that kid in berserk mode … she slaughters those specters like it was nothing! I don't know how she sees them. They kill me every time."

Liara looked at Hannah confused, "My daughter loves playing this game where she saves the galaxy. She thinks that she is this super Marine when she plays it."

"Better a game, I suppose, than real life." Liara smiled.

"Yes." Hannah agreed, "And this is my husband, Pierce, who is drinking …" Both Liara and Hannah realized that he was sipping Kaffee as he held the other cup out to her. "Oh, my. How much of that have you drank?"

Pierce looked at his cup, "Just a bit. Why?"

"Oh, Pierce." Hannah looked to Liara for guidance.

Liara took the cup from him and quickly called her cousin, "Siby? … no, my flight has not departed. I think that I will need to go home and try tomorrow." Hannah and Pierce watched as Liara delicately cut her cousin off, "Please Sibila, I need some help. Do you mind if I put you on audio?"

A few seconds and they could all hear Sibila, "a cute human female that I think you might actually like. She has these tempting lips-"

Liara smiled as she tried to not look embarrassed, "Cousin, please I need to know what would happen to a male human my height ... about 180lbs that drank about a third of a cup of Kaffee?"

"Ooooh," Sibila seemed excited. "Send him my way and I can help him get ri-"

"Sibila, please!" Liara regretted putting her cousin on audio.

"Okay. Okay. How much?"

"A third of a cup. That isn't enough for his mate to be worried, right?" Her first interaction with humans and it couldn't be more embarrassing. Liara, out of nervousness, pulled out her prothean jewelry that was in her pocket and began to rub it like a worry stone. She was taking it back home since once again after trying to wear it the piece had broken another vase plus a window at her office.

Hannah was trying not to look worried and Pierce was just confused about why they were so concerned about him … _What the hell is wrong? What did I do now? And why am I getting hard? Aw, shit! Now Hannah is gonna think it's this asari._ An asari walked by with just a sheer top and bottom on, _Double shit!_ "Huh, Hannah, I think I'll go sit down."

"Wait, Pierce." Hannah turned and saw the bulge in his pants. "Oh, right."

She stood in front of him and as her posterior rubbed against him he gave out a little whimper. "Hannah."

"I'm sorry," Hannah stepped a little farther in front. "Just think of your mother."

"What?" Pierce was starting to bend. Nope, this was not good. _Mother, mother, mother_.

"Well, if he just recently drank it he should have an erect penis by now … the poor human is probably starting to bend over, especially with pants on … they would make him really uncomfortable, especially tight pants. I can just imagine the bulge."

Liara looked at Hannah who nodded. "Right … okay, is there anything that he can do? How long it will last?"

"Well ... as humans would say ... he could fuck for starters!"

Liara could feel heat on her face as she tried to not look at the Shepards, "Not an option."

"Well, that's a waste of a good shaft! I guess he can just rub it himself and after a few hours and about 4 … no 5 ejaculations he should be okay. At least that's what happened to Tustin. That's how we met, he bought a cup of Kaffee as well and I helped him ease the tension." Sibila giggled, "I love being helpful! Maybe you and his mate could-"

Liara was turning an even darker shade of blue as Hannah looked at her, "There isn't anything he can take to counter the drink?"

Sibila laughed, "Not unless you consider the juices of his lover-"

"No, I don't!"

"I'm only trying to help. That female I met actually asked me about EtZev … can you imagine a human who actually hears the beauty in that? It would be really interesting to give her a little Kaffee an-"

"Thank you Sibila!" And with that Liara cut her cousin off.

"Please just show me the men's restroom." Pierce panted.

"Men's?" Liara shook her head. "Oh, we can help you into the washroom."

"Isn't there a men's only?" Pierce was bending lower.

"I'm sorry but gender .." Liara could see that if he stayed there any longer he would be on the floor. She looked up and saw the recently added male sign and felt foolish. "It seems with more species coming here they have …" Pierce groaned and Hannah helped him to the men's restroom.

As she left Pierce in the stall he could barely get his pants open before his first ejaculation hit. _Dear god, I think I just lost an eyeball!_ He thought after he had stopped ... it had even seemed to last longer than any cum moment in his life_. Did that asari on the audio say 5 times? If I do that another 4 times I'll be dead! _Pierce felt a deep throb and could feel an erection start again. _If I do survive this I'll never drink Kaffee, coffee, tea … hell, I won't drink any- aahhh, shit! I think …_ Pierce had never felt desire this strong and knew if he didn't start stroking he would … _Oh, Hannah_.

Hannah took Liara by the hand, "Thank you so much for attacking me with coffee ... I mean, kaffee." Liara giggled. "The thought of drinking the … well, thank you so much. I wish that I had something ... wait." Hannah remembered the present that her daughter had given her just last year ... she took off the silver bracelet with a little cross, "Please accept this as a thank you."

Liara took it and graciously accepted the gift, "I would like to give you something but all I have is a piece of jewelry that likes to break vases and windows. It's an actual prothean piece that I found years ago."

Hannah looked at the odd piece and accepted with a smile, "I'm happy to accept this. My daughter might need it in her fight to save the galaxy." Hannah and Liara smiled at each other. "It was a pleasure meeting you Liara."

"No, Hannah … it was my pleasure."

Liara had heard that while humans were both aggressive and sexually driven, there was something about this female that said otherwise. She somehow reminded Liara of her own mother. _How can a human carry herself like a matriarch? The way she seems to carefully balance her words. She also understands the delicacy of communication. I must ask mother if she has ever met a human like this._


	21. Prison Break

I'VE NEVER KNOWN A HUMAN LIKE YOU. I WISH THAT YOU WOULD COME TO NOS ASTRA SO WE CAN SPEND TIME TOGETHER OR I COULD COME AND VISIT YOU ON MINDOIR. DO YOU THINK THAT I WOULD LIKE IT THERE? KISSES, ELNORA

"Frick, what do I do?" Ricky asked Shepard.

Shepard looked at the e-mail from her friend's pen pal, "Not really sure. How long have you two been dating? … I mean writing?"

"Three years, 3 months, 2 weeks and 4 days … not that I'm counting." Ricky said as he put the netbook on the desk.

"Clearly." Shepard laughed. "I don't know, Rickster. You can't keep putting her off forever."

"I know," Ricky groaned as he flopped on his bed. "If I can just make it two more years then I'll be of age. I can meet her on Illium and we can get married."

"Married? Has she said she wants to get married?"

"Well, no ... But isn't that what all you women want? Well, besides you! You want a new motorcycle and …" Shepard, knowing where her friend was about to go, got up and pinned him on the bed.

"Don't say it!" She threatened.

"… a krogan named Beast!" Ricky laughed as he wiggled beneath Shepard, "I know that you dream about your big hunkin' reptile!"

"Will you just let that go?" Shepard began fake choking him. "That was 6 years ago, you frickin ass."

Shepard rolled off her friend and they laid together on the bed looking up at the ceiling. Ricky stretched over Shepard to his nightstand drawer and pulled out a photo of Elnora. "Now, take a look at the picture she just sent."

Shepard shook her head and pushed it away. "I told you that they all look alike! And after the asari on Illium, I'm not looking at or talking to another one again in my life!"

Ricky shook his head, placed the photo back in his nightstand drawer. "I can't believe that you keep refusing to look at my future wife! How will you be my best man?" Shepard looked at Ricky as she got up, stood over him, bumping his legs with hers. Ricky smiled at his best friend, "Illium ... I don't get you Shep. If that had been me with that asari … oh, baby!"

Just then Ricky's mother opened the bedroom, "Hi Elizabeth." Shepard smiled at her. "Ricky, please leave your door open when you have company. Okay?"

As Mrs. Parks continued on down the hallway Ricky rolled his eyes as Shepard shook her head, "What is going on with her? We use to camp together in my backyard. Why did she stop trusting us? You're my best friend!"

"I know," Shepard sighed, sitting on the window seat next to Pepe Le Pew. "Dad saw Tyler and me swimming the other day and Ty helped me take of my shirt. Dad kinda flipped and told me to never let a boy undress me again." Ricky rolled his eyes. "What the frick? It was Ty! My shirt was tangled and … Dad got all red and … crap."

"Didn't I take your pants off once?" Ricky grinned.

Shepard laughed, "That was a bee sting, we were 8 and it was shorts!" Ricky continued to grin. "Okay, yes you got my pants … shorts off. But I don't think that our parents are really worried about the disrobing part."

"I know ... crazy. My mom looks nervous now every time you come in my bedroom," Ricky pulled up his shirt to patt his belly. "I mean ... really? I've known you almost all of my life ... double crazy."

"Triple crazy." Shepard agreed. "You know, all I kept thinking was how it was Ty ... It's not like it was Tait taking my shirt off … It was Tyler!"

"Wait …What? … Tait? Tait Rickman?" Ricky turned around on his bed so that he could lay on his back and hang his head upside down over the side just to get closer at Shepard. "You and Tait Rickman?"

"Shhh!" Shepard put her hand over her friend's face, "No. I'm just saying that …"

"Yeeesssssss?" Ricky mimicked a snake and then turned over, cradling his chin in his hand ... "Please go on!"

"Okay, freak. I like him. I like him and he likes me … or at least he says that he does. It's weird. We were just friends and then these past few months he started looking at me like … like …"

"The other blind and stupid boys?" Ricky said batting his eyes at her.

"Ass!" Shepard frowned as she got up and crawled on the bed next to him, "More boys have started acting weird around me, everyone but you and Ty."

Ricky sat up and pressed his forehead against hers, "That's because we know what an absolute creep you are!" Shepard fake slapped him and laid down on the bed next to him again. "So when did this Romeo and Juliet story unfold?" Ricky asked.

"Just a month ago … He told me after one of mom's piano lessons with him. I was working on my stupid ass bike … that thing is driving me …"

Ricky turned on his side, "Back to the smexy stuff!"

"What?" She saw the fake leer on his face and pushed his face away again. "Stop! It's not like that. He is smart, nice and … cute. Something about his smile makes me-"

Ricky laughed, holding his stomach, "By the great Bacchus! Shepard is in LOVE!"

"Shut up Ricky!" Shepard jumped on top of Ricky again and began wrestling with him.

Ricky covered his face, and still laughing, "Okay! Okay! I give!" As they stopped wrestling Ricky realized something, "So are you the reason that he and his dad didn't go away this summer like he was talking?"

Shepard nodded, "His dad was taking him to the Alliance Museum after he didn't hear back from the Naval Academy … I know that I should have told him to go, but I asked him to stick around. Momma says to always put others first. But sometimes you have to think about yourself. Right?"

"Sure." Ricky answered. "You know that Broder wrote Freddy and said that boot camp in the Alliance is a killer. Man, Broder an Alliance soldier. Crazy! When I turn 18 … off to Illium! I don't care what my momma says. Elnora and me forever!"

Shepard got up and sat back down on the window seat. "You can't tell anyone. Not yet at least, okay?" Ricky said ok. "Not even Tyler!"

"Okay, okay. He gets along with your parents, right? I mean, I know the pastor likes him … he kisses her butt at church. I think he is really in love with the pastor and using you to get to her."

"Really?" Shepard asked. "Well ... that figures. Who doesn't love my mom?"

"True."

"Dad likes him too and he even invited him to go fishing with us this Sunday."

"Your dad invited him on one of your prison breaks?" Rick asked. "Crap! Your dad does like him. Maybe he is the son he wanted and now you will be thrown to the side."

Shepard threw Pepe at Ricky, "Freak!" The room grew quiet as Ricky looked at his stuffed skunk and Shepard looked out the window. "Tait wants to ask dad if he can take me to his prom."

Ricky whistled at the news, "That is serious. Prom. So what does he have that I don't have, girlfriend?" Shepard cocked an eye at him. "Wait. Let me think … He's almost 18, musKels, blooooond hair, bluuuuue eyes, purty face …" Shepard laughing pounced back on him, knocking Pepe on the floor.

Mrs. Parks hearing too much bed movement again popped back into the room, "Everything okay in here?"

"Shepard is trying to rape me!" Ricky said as he continued to scream with laughter.

* * *

"Miss Shepard, keep alert or you're gonna be caught off-guard!" and with that Shepard found herself pushed off her seat and sprawled on the ground. Looking up she saw her father standing over her with his Savannah Sand Gnats cap twisted at a goofy angle.

"Dad," Shepard knew not to fall asleep or daydream when out fishing with her father, "I'm telling mom on you when we get home!"

The thought of preacher woman took the smile off Pierce's face. Fishing on Sunday was an absolute no-no in the Shepard household for their daughter. Attending the Immanuel Baptist Church was mandatory. The thought brought his mind quickly around to the preacher, with Bible in hand, looking out and not seeing Eli in her seat, front and center. Not seeing her because she had snuck out with him before sun up, giggling like naughty children as Hannah lay asleep. They both knew that they would pay for this, but summer was in full swing and there was bass calling their names. When they had pulled onto Birgit's place she was heading out to work, "Eli? Oh, shit! You two are fuckin' nuts! Pastor is not going to be happy."

Pierce put his cap on Shepard's head playfully, "That was truly uncalled for little miss. We do not mention the warden when we are in the middle of a temporary prison break."

"Someone say 'prison break'?" Tait Rickman was struggling with his chair, tackle box, fishing poles and bait as he appeared from behind a tree. As soon as he saw Shepard still sitting on the ground, he smiled, bumped his knee on the oversized cooler, lost his balance and tumbled to the ground.

"It's about time young man," Pierce said as he helped Tait up off the ground. Then the two began picking up the dropped items and getting the boy settled in. "Eli and I thought that you had forgotten about today."

"No sir," Tait grinned as he looked over at Shepard. "I wouldn't forget, er … our fish-"

"Okay son," Pierce laughed, as he placed Tait's chair to the left of his chair. "Bait up, shut up and sit down."

* * *

From Tait's first day at Roald Amundsen High School, he became part of the popular crowd. He joined the baseball team and with his athletic abilities, good looks and sweet personality he could have easily had his pick of the local girls. He had avoided dating though; instead he had focused on his studies, baseball, martial arts and piano lessons. He had really not wanted to learn piano but his father insisted and over time he found that he liked going to the Shepard home. Mrs. Shepard had quickly become an "adopted" mother to him and he couldn't help but laugh at the way Mr. Shepard and Elizabeth teased each other. He started attending the Immanuel Baptist Church and helped the pastor whenever she asked.

Over the next two years Tait and Shepard slowly became friends, with her showing him around Mindoir, introducing him to her friends and both attending each other's sporting events: her rugby matches and his baseball games. She had even taken him to the shooting range where she tried to teach him to shoot her Aunt B's Helix sniper rifle. "Tait, as Aunt B would say 'focus, breathe and squeeze'." He had not enjoyed being around firearms so she focused on teaching him how to fish … He discovered that he could share his feelings with her and she wouldn't laugh or do silly girl things. They would work out together and she even took him cliff diving a few times. Well, he would go but unlike her he was too aware of the risks and chose to just watch.

In fact, Tait was much more cautious than Shepard and while he thought her daring nature was great, it also scared him. The chances she took worried him that she could get hurt. But looking back, that was where he started to really see her in a different light. Then when he shared his dreams of becoming an aerospace engineer, of being part of a team creating new types of spaceships, she had smiled and encouraged him. With her he felt safe to talk about his mother who had died just a year before he moved to Mindoir. Safe to tell her the real reason that she was not with them … She had taken her own life and he had been the one to find her body. She had shot herself in the head and he had seen the aftermath. Her letter simply read, "I can't anymor". In her arms he had cried one night after giving his standard line "I only think about all the good times that we had and the happiness she brought into my life. Everything else is … well, it means nothing." Shepard had looked deep into his eyes and he had crumbled. For the first time since he had held his dead mother in his arms, he cried.

Yes he noticed that Shepard was developing into a very attractive and well built girl, along with the other boys, but he was falling for her easy charm and the way that she listened, really listened. After she had returned to Mindoir, following her 16th birthday, there were a few local boys that even told her how they felt and when she confided it to Tait he panicked at the thought of her dating anyone other than him … So he braved the fear of rejection one evening after he had a piano lesson at the Shepard home.

She had been working on her Indian motorcycle when he walked over to her. He watched as she struggled with the clutch and he could see her getting angrier. "You frickin bitch! If you don-"

Tait took her by the arm and as she turned to face him, he smiled and hoped that she would calm down. She looked up at him and he had planned on saying something nice, romantic … okay, something corny. But when Shepard turned still angry, all he could do was smile at her. She saw his smile and her anger evaporated. She stepped into him and reached up … sharing her first real kiss. The kiss was tender, soft and chaste. As they pulled away he looked down at her clutch, "Can I help?"

Shepard smiled and watched as he started working on her bike. Hannah had seen the whole thing and smiled. She couldn't have picked a better boy for her daughter. _How do I get Pierce onboard with this?_ she thought as she watched the boy helping her daughter fix her bike.

Tait was a beautiful boy, fair skin with blond hair and dark blue eyes. Shepard loved when he smiled; it showed off his dimples. She also loved how he always seemed to see the good in things. There wasn't a malicious bone in his body and he really cared about people. He was quick and precise on the mat at his father's martial arts school but off the mat he was mild in temperament. She had never seen him angry and he had a way of cooling her jets when she felt herself getting angry. All he had to do really was just smile at her.

* * *

Shepard looked at her father as he helped Tait untangle his line and smiled. She knew that while her father liked Tait he did not want her to date anyone. She hoped that he liked Tait just enough to let him escort her to the prom. But she wasn't holding her breath. In the last few months her dad had started to treat her different around her guy friends. Even today, her father was sitting between Tait and her on the bank.

As the hours passed, the trio enjoyed the peacefulness of the Kalix Lake on Birgit's place. Tait would sneek looks at Shepard in-between his bites of a pear while Pierce read "The Maltese Falcon" silently and Shepard sketched the river.

"Mr. Shepard," Tait had just recast his reel, "I was wondering if next Saturday …. Well, if next Saturday …." The boy seemed to lose his nerve and began fiddling with his reel.

Pierce had seen the way Tait had looked at his daughter. Hell, he had noticed how boys around town were looking at her. It drove him crazy. But Tait had never been obscene or disrespectful with his daughter ... and when Hannah had mentioned that the two young kids liked each other he could see that Hannah approved. He liked the kid but date his daughter? _That would mean kissing ... and he might try ... I"ll killl him!_ But after talking with Hannah about the young man and the upcoming prom ... "You know he might ask her, husband." Hannah said. _Aw, crap!_ But okay ... it was agreed that he would approve if asked. Not that he was happy about it or going to make it any easier on the boy to ask, so he just sat there looking at him.

As the sounds of the lake and woods made their way between the two, Shepard got up from her chair and stretched. "Dad, do you want a sandwich or something to drink? I think momma made you a Dagwood Special! Yum!" Pierce shook his head while not breaking eye contact with Tait.

Shepard went to the cooler and pulled out a chicken salad sandwich, chips and a Coke as she looked back and saw her boyfriend looking at his shoes while her father sat looking at the boy. "Dad, leave Tait alone."

"Naw, it's okay," Tait responded. "We were just talking about next Saturday."

"Oh, prom," Shepard said as she plopped back in her chair. "So can we go, dad?"

Pierce kept looking at the boy, who was nervously picking at his jeans now. Shepard reached over, pushed her dad and raised a brow at him. _Shit old man, why didn't she look homely like you? No, she had to grow up into a beautiful girl like preacher woman. Why couldn't you be a fugly girl?_ The night before when Hannah told him that Tait and Shepard liked each other, he told her that he was afraid that Tait might do something. Hannah had laughed and then told him, "Pierce, you shouldn't be worried about Tait taking advantage of Elizabeth. You should be nervous of her taking advantage of the boy. The great Shepard can lead a horse to water and make it drink."

Shepard looked at her dad, smiled and bit into her sandwich. _Oh, Bacchus, you have your mother's brains. I'm fucked!_ Pierce narrowed his eyes, trying to look fatherly … "Where is it and who will be there to chaperone?"

"You know where it's at," Shepard bit a chip, "Tait's dad will be there and I was hoping that you and mom could go as well."

"I don't know Eli." Pierce thought of seeing his daughter slow dance with a boy and he was feeling a little sick.

"Come on dad. It would be good for you and mom to just go out, dance and relax." She smiled.

Pierce looked at his daughter, not knowing if she was joking or serious. He turned to the very quiet and nervous Tait, "You want the preacher woman at your prom?"

Tait nodded, "Yes sir, Mr. Shepard. Both of you."

Pierce took his hat off, placed it on his knee and looked out over the river. _Well that was good, right?_ He wouldn't have wanted any mother at his prom, especially his or his date's. God, he had loved his prom. He screwed … _wait. Crap. This boy is wanting to … _

"So? Can I go to the prom with Tait?" Shepard asked as Tait went back to looking at his boots.

He could feel his daughter's green eyes on him and knew that he would give in. He sat lower in his chair, put his cap back on his head, lowered it to hide his eyes and raised his hands. "As long as you can get the preacher woman to chaperone, you can go with Tait."

Shepard laughed, jumped from her chair and into her father's lap. He began laughing too as she removed his cap, put her arms around him and kissed him. "You are one fine father, Mr. Shepard."

"Thank you, Miss Shepard." Torn between two green eyed females, that was Pierce Shepard's lot in life.

* * *

Later that afternoon as they arrived home, Pierce looked at his daughter and whispered, "I just remembered that I promised to see Rowan at the pub."

"Dad, are you leaving me to face mom alone?"

Shepard looked at his daughter, smiled and slowly began backing up. "Important business calling."

"You know they call that being a coward, right?"

"As my pal Rowan O'Hara would say, 'Ní thuigim'" And with that, Pierce tipped his baseball cap at his daughter and headed towards O'Malley's Pub, whistling "When Irish Eyes are Smiling".

Shepard watched her dad until he rounded the corner and then turned to look at their front door. Shepard knew that her mother was going to give her an earful about missing church and fishing on Sunday. She had heard the "You are the daughter of the pastor, young lady. How do you think it looks when the pastor can't even get her own to church?" Pierce had left his daughter to face the preacher alone.

Young Shepard looked at the front door, took a deep breath and placed her hand on the door knob. "Here goes nothing," she said to herself as she turned the knob.


	22. Kinder Things

She heard her daughter enter the home and could tell that she was trying to sneak in. Her movements were a little too soft, a little too quiet. As she sat there debating on whether to call her daughter into her bedroom or just let her think that she had successfully infiltrated the house, she heard a thump, items falling and a yelp.

"Liara?" Matriarch Benezia called out, trying to hide her humor. "Are you okay?"

Matriarch Benezia heard mumbling, rustling of paper, another thud and then Liara appeared in the doorway. She was trying to balance scrolls, books and a little odd-shaped metal piece as she rubbed her right knee. The Matriarch, even propped up in her bed, looked imposing and regal. Had Liara come home just an hour prior, she would have found her mother and 23 of the Matriarch's acolytes at the T'Soni estate listening to the Matriarch Nephele discuss the spiritual teachings of the goddess Athame.

"I'm fine mother." Liara responded as she dropped the metal object. "I thought that you would be asleep by now."

Benezia patted the empty place next to her and Liara slowly limped her way over after placing the items still in her arms on a chair. "Liara, were you with Matriarch Eyto tonight?" Liara was seated next to her mother on the bed and did not answer her. Benezia stroked her daughter's cheek and asked again, "Liara, were you out with the matriarch?"

"No, mother." Liara answered as she placed her head in her mother's lap. "Professor T'Lemk wanted to talk with me. So I met her at Korain's for dinner. She wants me to return to her."

Benezia stiffened at this response but restrained from saying what she truly felt. She could at this point forbid her daughter from ever seeing the professor again and Liara would have to comply. But Benezia wanted to give her daughter a chance to show that she could make wise decisions. Some asari thought that Benezia was too lenient with her daughter, but she would counter that Liara needed room to grow. "And is that what you want, Liara?"

Liara lifted her head, looked at her mother and then laid her head back in her lap. Benezia waited in silence as her daughter collected her thoughts. Benezia began to rub Liara's back and hum an old Asari lullaby as she let her daughter think.

Nicia had started calling Liara at the Thessia Guildhall since the first week she had been home. After the first call, Liara had requested that all calls to her from the professor be routed to her voice mail only. Then she had seen Nicia just a week prior when she was at the Serrice Delphinus Skyball Stadium with her mother and realized that she really couldn't keep avoiding the professor. So she had reached out and invited her to dinner. Nicia had begged her to return, to give their life together another try, "Liara, we were so happy. My friends ask about you all the time and even they say how good we were together." Liara had explained that she was not ready for a commitment that the matron was wanting and asked Nicia to find another who was ready to mate. Liara could not see that the professor was hurting, nor could she understand. She had moved on the moment she walked away and no explanation would make her see how the matron felt. "I know that you are concerned about mating with me because of your own mother. That's okay. We can find a donor. I just want you back."

_A donor? Why didn't mother find a donor? What was her partner like that they would decide to go against the asari norm? _This question had been on her mind as of late. "Mother?"

"Yes?"

"Why did you choose an asari to mate with? You could have followed Theia's path when she had Siby." Benezia caught her breath. Liara had never questioned Benezia's choice and she had always been grateful. Benezia could turn her heart to stone when needed but hearing her daughter question where she came from ... who that other person had been ... it was painful. She remembered the first time that she had seen Aethyta on Luisa. She was sketching as she sat under a large tree ... Benezia had thought that she was slacking off and when she inquired about the worker ... she was told that Aethyta was hard-working, smart and could fix any equipment in a matter of seconds. So she started making up reasons to talk to her and while her language at times was jarring she found herself drawn to the salty-tongued asari.

One evening Benezia had walked out into the field and Aethyta so passionate, open and straight-forward caught her under a tree that she claimed was her favorite ... Benezia thought all the trees were the same, really ... but not this asari. She had named them all and the one they were standing under she had named Azure. This had made Benezia laughed. Aethyta pulled Benezia close and kissed her in that very moment. Benezia had never known anyone to not be so intimidated by her to make the first move until this creature ... she couldn't help but bring her to her bed ... She knew that they would have still been together if not for her lover's possessive nature. She had hoped after they were bondmates that Aethyta would trust her more but it only got worse ... Benezia had tried to calm her fears, show that she was committed to her. But Aethyta saw threats where there weren't any ... Benezia had told her to stop mimicking her father but that only led her to go on about her being "half krogan!"

When she had watched her sister with her own daughter it made her realize what she was missing so she had decided to have her own. Aethyta was away cooling her head again and Benezia had debated on mating with her turian friend on Palaven but ... her mother had looked down on that. Dianthe believed in asari with asari only ... To use other species weakened and ultimately spoiled the seed. She was scheduled to leave for Palaven when Aethyta had come home. Benezia took that as a sign and despite her concerns that their relationship was not going to last much longer she drug her off to Messonia and mated like asari of old. That was something that she never regretted and when it came time to start teaching her daughter the ritual ... well, it had meant so much more to her. Her mind then wandered to the very next night … _no, can't think of those times_ … and as she felt tears escaping silently down her cheeks, Liara looked up at her. "Oh, mother." Liara kissed away a tear and Benezia placed her hand on her daughter's cheek.

"Let's talk of kinder things," Benezia said softly. She had failed in that relationship ... failed in giving Liara the life that she had with her mother's partner, Lioneka, co-raising her in a full house of love. Yes she knew that many asari raised their children alone but that is not what she wanted for her daughter. Being like others did not mean it was the best thing ... But Aethyta was too driven, angry, possessive and asari-centric. She didn't want her daughter to take on those traits ... she wanted Liara to be open to other species and willing to work outside of the asari world. She wanted her to act like a Corallium asari not a kroganish asari. It had made her laugh that even without Aethyta around Liara was so much like her ... but she was still more a T'Soni. Stubborn, intelligent and well-mannered ... She also knew that given time her daughter would start to see value in the outside world. She was already talking about salarian in a positive and kind way. _One step at a time_, Benezia smiled.

Liara quickly agreed not wanting to upset her mother more. She placed her head back on her mother's lap as Benezia went back to rubbing her back and humming. "Mother, am I too young to meld?"

Benezia sighed. _Why can't you be 50 again? Your questions were so much easier_. "Of course not, daughter ... We are talking about the melding of souls and not mating, correct?" Liara looked up at her mother. "You are much too young for mating, Liara."

"No mother, not mating. But Nicia says that most asari meld early now …."

Benezia could feel anger creeping up in her at what this matron was trying to do. "Liara, melding should only be with someone that you feel a true connection with ... a spiritual bond. It is performed when you want someone to see who you really are and to see who they truly are. It is both pleasurable and painful because it can leave you vulnerable with another soul. Do you remember what I told you during the sitruuna ritual training? It is the most vulnerable you will ever be with another." Liara looked up at her mother, tears in her eyes, "Little Wing, you are so young. Don't rush into anything. There will come a time that you meet someone who will be so unique that you won't feel a need to ask me. Then and only then will you know that it is time."

"No mother, I shall never want to meld." Liara shook her head with a look of seriousness on her face. "My life is going to be dedicated to the study of Prothean history, nothing more." Liara placed her head back on her mother's lap.

"I see," Benezia said. Her daughter could be so sure of things, just like the young. No knowledge of the road ahead, yet they think they know what the journey will be. And if a traveler meters ahead of them says 'Watch for that hole', they will ignore the advice and walk right into it. Benezia smiled and then looked down and saw the bracelet that her daughter had been wearing since she had come back from Illium. "Liara?"

"Yes, mother." Liara whispered.

Benezia fingered the silver cross on the bracelet, "Is there something that I should know?" Liara mumbled something and Benezia turned her daughter's head to face her. "Have you converted to Christianity?"

"Christey..?" Liara was confused and then saw what her mother was touching. "Oh, this is what that human named Hannah gave me."

"She gives you a human emblem of suffering, self-sacrifice and forgiveness." The Matriarch said more to herself, "And you gave her an instrument of destruction. Well, let's hope that after your gift inflicts suffering she will forgive you."

Liara giggled, "Mother! I didn't have anything else on me." Liara thought of the human with a bloody lip … _Oh, Goddess! A bloody tongue!_ And the humor left her, she then looked up at her mother in a panic, "Mother, you don't think that-"

Benezia laughed, "That my daughter is responsible for blood, broken glass and even possiblly fire to that human's home?" She guided Liara's head back to her lap. "I am sure that the human will have much more sense than my silly daughter." _I hope, although it would not surprise me to learn that you have created prothean destruction in another household_._ Why should our home be the only one ablaze, windows blown out and blood on the carpet._

_Why did you give her that piece_! Liara cursed herself, "I'll keep her in my morning Anskrit."

Benezia went back to rubbing her daughter's back and humming. Before too long, Benezia realized that Liara had fallen asleep so she carefully moved her daughter over next to her, turned out the lights and with the moons shining in her floor to ceiling windows looked at her sleeping daughter. "Little Wing," she whispered as she stroked her daughter's cheek, "You are the most important thing to me. I see in you such amazing things to come and the capacity to one day emotionally connect with others. I believe that you will grow to have the kind of rare loyalty and compassion that Justicar Cerelia had." Liara shifted in her sleep. _I pray that whoever the Goddess sends to share parts of your journey with, that each will be gentle and kind to you, daughter. Lovers that will temper your thoughts and inspire you to hold your tongue in wisdom … to share more than raw data and historical documents with you ... that each will inspire you to share your spirit and laughter._

* * *

Liara woke up hours later and as she gently got out of her mother's bed, she kissed her on the cheek and then made her way to her own bedroom, collecting her items as she went. The room was filled with books, pictures, artifacts, maps, data disks, empty cups and plates. She had been back at Thessia for three months and the Matriarch had requested that she return home while she worked on the statue at the Thessia Guildhall in Serrice. The three hour shuttle ride back and forth was worth it as it meant more time with the Matriarch and being home in Armali. She had just three days prior confirmed that the statue was not prothean. It had disappointed the hanar scholars who had believed that it was an important piece of the Endkindlers. It did favor statues on Kahje but the small intricate scratches at the base revealed what Liara believed from the start. She could see slight curls that spoke early asari, but she had to locate text from that time period and that was easier said than done. It had taken six weeks of looking through early works and then once she found similar scratches she had to decipher them to translate the base. While to some this type of work would be boring or tedious, Liara found it exciting, relaxing and fulfilling.

Liara sat down and started up her netpad ... She checked her mail and after answering a vid-mail to her cousin she saw and e-mail from Zazzy.

DR. T'SONI,

WE NEED A TRIP TO AETHOYNER. LOOKED AT DATA FROM YOUR LAST TRIP. INCREDIBLE, NOT SURE WHY WE DID NOT SEE BEFORE. SIMILAR LOGOGRAPHICS WRITINGS. ARRANGED ON OUR SIDE. AT AEY DOCK IN TWO DAYS TIME. CAN YOU MEET US THERE?

DR. KISH

PERSONAL ADD: DELPHINUS GAME AMAZING. EVERYONE AT SKYBASE SAW YOU THERE. CROWD CHEERED WHEN YOU WERE SHOWN ON SCREEN. JEALOUS. GREAT SEATS. WAS THAT THE MATRIARCH? DID I SAY JEALOUS? YES. JEALOUS. MUST LET ME SEE GAME FROM YOUR PRIVATE BOX. YES?

Liara smiled as she answered.

DR. KISH,

WILL ARRANGE TRANSPORT TO AEY DOCK POST-HASTE. REMEMBER TO BRING KIT. I WILL CONTACT THE K-456 RUINS ADMINISTRATOR FOR ACCESS. SHE IS VERY DISTRUSTFUL OF OUTSIDERS DUE TO RECENT ROBBERIES THAT HAVE OCCURRED. DON'T FORGET THE TRANSIT.

DR. T'SONI

DELPHY'S SMASHED THE T'S. THAT WAS THE MATRIARCH WITH ME AND SHE SEEMS REALLY HAPPY TO HAVE ME HOME. YOU AND SIBILA WERE RIGHT. SEE YOU SOON.

Liara smiled as she turned off the netpad and sat there looking at her bracelet. She remembered the woman and her mate and then got up and stretched. She had been so nervous when she first stepped back into her home. But everyone had been so warm and inviting that she quickly fell back into the rhythm. She walked out onto her private terrace and looked over at the reading room terrace and laughed. _What mother must have seen that night_. Liara shook her head and as she was about to turn she saw a turian enter the reading room with her mother. Why was mother up and what was a turian doing here at her mother's home on Thessia, especially at this late of an hour? Benezia looked up and saw her daughter across the way. She gave a look of concern and closed the outside doors, shutting out Liara's view. The turian shot a look over at Liara and she recognized him, Saren Arterius. She had met him before on Illium at the Opik Dinner, an event that recognized excellence in the top biotic-focused companies. He had been there with a VP of Binery Helix and she had escorted her Theia for Armali.

"Liara T'Soni?" Saren moved from behind the young asari, "How are you?"

Tatiaria moved in between the two, "Arterius, how nice to see you again. Can I help you?"

Saren never stopped looking at the younger asari, "No. I just wanted to send my respects to the great Matriarch Benezia. Would you be so kind to forward my deepest of admiration?" Saren asked as he put his hand on Liara's waist. "I hear that you are interested in the protheans."

Tatiaria firmly removed his hand from Liara, "It was a pleasure, but my sister's daughter and I must take our leave from you." Saren placing his hand on Liara's waist was considered very improper and forward, something that the turian would have known. Throughout the rest of the night, Saren tried to maneuver closer to her but Tatiaria ensured that he was always cut off.

Liara was never shy to discuss the protheans but this turian set her on edge. His forward way, improper touching and overall air about him told her to keep her tongue and distance. It was moments like this that she wished she had her mother's wisdom. Her aunt looked at her, "Stay away from that turian bastard! Do you hear me?"

Liara shook her head yes. Now in the late of the evening he was in her home. He was not only in her own, but given a very private audience with her mother. No, not her mother … the Matriarch. The look that her mother gave her was clear, _do not come near_. So Liara took off her bracelet and placed it on the nightstand, then stripped and got into bed. The last thing she remembered seeing before she slipped off to sleep was the little silver cross on her nightstand.


	23. Pepe at Dusk

The large wooden cross hung from the wall behind the pulpit of Pierce's preacher woman. The Immanuel Baptist choir was singing one of her favorite's _If We Never Meet Again_ as her daughter and sinner husband sat front and center. Shepard sat in the same place that she had sat since she could remember. When she was little she would sit there, legs dangling over the side looking antsy but under her mother's gaze and any wrong move and her mother would give her _the look_. As she got older she would beg to sit a little farther back, "I'm not asking to sit in sinner's row, just not in saint's row."

Hannah had laughed at that but it did not get Shepard what she wanted. "Elizabeth, do you find that spot uncomfortable?"

"Yes. Everyone can see me and none of my friends will sit with me. Even Ricky makes fun of me now for looking all goofy up front." Shepard had whined at 13. "It just seems … prideful to sit there. Like look at me, I'm the pastor's daughter. Plain prideful."

"Prideful huh?" Hannah looked sharply at her daughter, "No Elizabeth, it's prideful to think that you can outsmart and manipulate your own mother." Shepard groaned in defeat. "As long as I stand in front of that pulpit, you will sit right in front of it. You may feel uncomfortable but you will not look uncomfortable. You will hold yourself in such a way that others will want to sit there with you. You will look like my daughter … confident."

Shepard looked confused at her mother. "Huh? You want me to look like what?"

Hannah pinched her daughters nose, "You will look like you belong in that seat and that it is the best place to sit. You will do this with a genuine heart so much so that your friends will start sitting next to you and others will move closer. Not everything that you do in life will be what you want to do, Elizabeth. But in all things you will find the light in it … what is best so that you may inspire others as you claim it as yours. You must learn to find the joy or at least purpose, the reason in all that life throws at you. There is a reason for everything."

Shepard squinted her eyes at her mother, "Everything? C'mon mom … I woke up this morning and wore my Sand Gnat shirt. What reason would that be?"

Hannah swatted her daughter on the behind playfully, 'Don't be smart with me. While not ALL things mean something, all things can be used to change, learn and grow. Now as to wearing something … You picking your Sand Gnat shirt was done because you will be cleaning up the backyard and that shirt is perfect for the chore."

Shepard looked away from the cross and at her mother, "I can't see the joy sitting here today mother … or the purpose. But I'll try and be strong for you today, I promise."

* * *

Just three days earlier the Shepards had thrown a B-B-Q party in their backyard as summer was coming to a close. Shepard had invited all her friends and as she stripped down to her 2-piece not only the boys looked but so did Pierce. "Aw, shit, Hannah why did you let Eli buy that … that … aw, I'm getting my gun."

Hannah had laughed and pulled her husband to her. "You will do no such thing. I do not want to be married to a man in orange that is also a prison bitch."

"Preacher woman!" Pierce pulled back from his wife, shocked at what she had just said and then laughed. "I have never heard you swear in my life!"

Hannah looked embarrassed, "I'm sorry, Pierce. Either this headache is getting to me or living with you two has finally rubbed off on me. That will not do."

"You want me to get you an aspirin?" Pierce had asked, putting down the spatula.

Hannah said no and then looked out at their daughter who was standing on the dock and wrestling Ricky. "She is growing up, husband. No matter what we do our little girl is going to grow up."

Pierce was still looking at his wife, wondering what other swear words he could get her to say, "Can you say-"

"No." Hannah answered as she turned away and began greeting more guests that had just arrived.

As Shepard wrestled Ricky, she noticed that Tait's face was getting red, so when Ricky hugged her she said in his ear, "I think we need to stop. Tait is looking upset."

Ricky turned around, "He sure is … I hate this growing up thing!" And with that Ricky pushed Shepard into the river and dove in after.

As they both came up, Ricky joked, "Maybe if you give him a little."

"I did." Shepard said and swam under the dock.

Ricky chased his friend, "What?"

* * *

"What do you mean you're not ready?" Shepard asked Tait as he rolled off her. The two had gone on a picnic overlooking the river and the make-out session that followed their swim had turned serious. Shepard had seen other girls chase Tait since he moved to Mindoir and now he had just told her that he was leaving in a couple weeks. He had finally received his acceptance letter from the United States Naval Academy for the upcoming semester. He had applied earlier in the year after his Uncle, a congressman, had nominated him and thought that he had been rejected. Instead the letter had been misdirected and after half a year finally made it Highland Falls, Mindoir. The thought that he would be around older girls, women! She wanted him to know that she could hold her own sexually, that she wasn't a child or a prude ... just because she was a preacher's daughter.

"Elizabeth," Tait groaned as he lay on his back with one arm draped over his eyes and his other hand placed over his swim trunks. "This isn't right. If your parents found out …."

"Tait," Shepard whispered as she removed his hand, "I wasn't planning on telling my parents. Unless you think we should?" Tait had to smile but before he could respond, he felt her hand replace his, "If you don't want to though … "

Tait removed his arm and looked at where she was touching. He did want to … with her, but he also knew that if her parents and his dad ever found it. He pulled her hand away and rolled carefully over on to his stomach. His blond hair fell into his eyes and as he went to brush it back, Shepard propped herself up on her right elbow, "Tait, I want you to be my first."

"And I want to be your only," Tait answered as he looked over at her. "Elizabeth, I don't want you to think that I am like all the rest of those guys. I want this to be real."

"You are definitely not like other boys," Shepard giggled. "My other boyfriends don't even need to be asked."

Tait pulled on Shepard's arm, knocking her over and the next thing she knew, he was on top of her. "Don't even joke like that."

"Like you don't know that other boys and girls want to take your place?" Shepard teased.

"What boys? Wait ... what?" Tait stopped, "Girls?"

This made Shepard laugh at the shocked look on his face, "You have competition Mr. Rickman."

"Elizabeth, stop teasing me. This is serious. We can't …"

Elizabeth had started kissing Tait and pushing up against him. She could feel that his resistance was weakening and as she brushed her lips against his neck, she felt him start to pull on her bathing shorts. He was telling her how he loved her, how he wanted to really make her his, how he wanted to marry her and she just listened. Tait, feeling her beneath him and moving against him, knew that he couldn't hold out much longer and was pulling her shorts off with such force that they both heard it tear. His passion was starting to scare her and she shifted slightly to ease the tension, "Tait, slow down. I'm not going anywhere."

His breathing was labored, and although she was not quite sure of what she was doing, she knew that she would need to lead on this or he might hurt her. She instructed him to pull off his shorts and then helped guide him in. As he entered she felt pain, heard his moan and felt his body give in to what he had wanted all along. Shepard could hear the river, the birds, nature all around along with the sound of passing cars now and again as the highway leading to the mines was off to the east. The wind blowing west was carrying the sound to them and Shepard focused on things outside of herself. The smell of gardenias was in the air and as she caught a whiff, Tait continued telling her how he loved her between his boy grunts.

It was over just as fast as it started, that first time for Shepard. There were no fireworks, no 'to the moon' feeling, but it was perfect, and it was Tait Rickman, the most beautiful boy on Mindoir. As they lay together on the blanket, Shepard with her head on his chest listened to his heartbeat. He tried to tell her again how much he loved her, but words were failing him and so she raised up a little and kissed his chin, "Shh, I know Tait. Just listen to the birds."

* * *

"Three days ago." Shepard said to Ricky, not adding that they had done it at least twice every day since.

Ricky looked back at Tait who was watching them, "What was it like? You know the humpty dumpty."

Shepard splashed him, "You know what it is like. I know about the blow up asari doll under your bed."

Ricky could be heard laughing all the way up to the house. His laughter bothered Tait, and it was an unfamiliar feeling to him. He had never been the kind of boy who chased girls or felt possessive about anything, except Shepard. She made him feel things and not all good to his way of thinking. He wanted her all to himself, but she was the kind of person that loved being in a crowd. She loved dancing and laughing and playing music and telling jokes and … all he wanted now was to get her alone again and touch her. Have all her attention on him and have her say soft words, maybe even 'I love you'. She had not said that to him even though he had said it to her countless of times. He had cancelled his and his father's vacation just to be with her and even if she had told him to go, well not a chance. He saw Ricky and Shepard get close under the dock and he quickly pulled off his shirt, removed his shoes and waded in.

"Told you it would work," Ricky said as they watched.

Shepard smiled, wanting nothing more than to get Tait in her arms and kiss him.

* * *

The sound of Beethoven's _Bagatelle No. 25 in A Minor_, better known as _Fur Elise_, filled the church as Shepard played her mother's favorite classical piece. She concentrated and remembered everything that her mother had taught her, trying to ensure that this one time she got it completely right. That she would make her mother proud.

"Elizabeth, you must put more emotion into the piece … and sit up." Hannah instructed as Shepard played Rachmaninov's _Prelude in C Sharp Minor, Op3_. The B-B-Q party had finished just an hour prior and while Pierce was outside cleaning up with Stu helping, Shepard was practicing the piano. Even with a full day of playing hostess and battling a headache, Hannah would not let her daughter's lesson go unattended.

As Shepard finished the first piece she saw her mother squinting, "Momma, can't we just-"

"No Elizabeth," Hannah said as she rubbed her temples.

Shepard turned to face her mother, "Mom, I can tell that you aren't feeling well. Please … I can practice tomorrow twice as long. Can't we skip one practice?"

"Okay, just this once." Hannah smiled. "But only this once! Do you hear me?"

Shepard got up and kissed her mother, "Sure. Sure. Just this once, master!"

Hannah laughed, swatted her on the behind and mock scolded, "Don't you get smart with me, my Whisper!"

Hannah went out and sat on the porch swing as Pierce said goodnight to Stu after they had finished up the cleaning. "Well, hello there salty tongued woman."

Hannah smiled at her husband as he sat next to her, "Please forget what I said earlier. It was inappropriate of me."

"But very sexy" Pierce touched his wife's breast, "Talk like that some more."

Hannah pushed his hand away as she looked towards where her daughter was, "Stop. Elizabeth might see." Pierce gave a slight pout. "Pierce, stop pouting. Everything done?"

"Of course." He put his arm around her. "What, you don't trust me?"

Hannah leaned her head against him, "Of course I do. Can we go to bed early tonight?"

"Only if you talk a little dirty and say the word f-"

Hannah put her hand over his mouth, "Pierce, please. You know how I hate that word."

Pierce pulled his wife's hand away, kissed it and then kissed her. "I love you wife of mine."

"I love you too. Now behave." Hannah laid her head back on his shoulder.

Shepard came outside, two glasses of ice tea and handed them to her parents, "Thought you might like something to drink."

"See Pierce," Hannah smiled, taking a glass, "We are blessed with a very thoughtful daughter. Thank you, ma petite chou."

"Why thank you," Pierce said. "You know that she probably spit in these." He jokingly whispered to his wife before he asked "Did you get your bike up and running?"

"No." Shepard looked over at it. "I can't figure out what's wrong. I'll have Tait take a look tomorrow ... maybe he can figure it out."

"What? Ask a dumb blond boy when you have me? Let me take a look," Pierce got up and went with his daughter to the two-wheel demon.

As Hannah watched her two loves she smiled, _thank you God for being so good to me .._. That was Hannah's last thought as she lowered her head and passed away.

* * *

Shepard was at the piano accompanying her father as he sang Hannah's favorite gospel song _In The Garden_, guitar in hand. Pierce was looking at the preacher woman as he sang, looking at her peaceful face and knowing that only she could ever get him to willingly step in a church and sing some hokey gospel tune. Or actually talk to a god that he didn't believe in. Or maybe the right word would be yell at a god.

It was the next night after Hannah had died from an aneurysm, Pierce had walked out towards the dock and stood looking at the water … Daring one of the horse-teeth fish to mess with him that night. Then he looked up at the night sky, thinking of his wife, thinking of his daughter … "Hannah. Why?" He felt the tears coming and he bent his head. "I can't do this without you. I can't … I can't breathe without you. And Eli … Your Elizabeth, your Whisper. How is she going to make it without you? Damn it Hannah … she is at that woman-y age. She doesn't need a father! She needs you. Goddam it!" Pierce fell to his knees, tears flowing and he became angry. "Is this your doing?" Pierce looked up into the night sky again, "Did you want me to believe in Him so much that you allowed Him to take you? Is that it? OK! I'll believe in your God if only to hate him! To curse him! Do you hear me God? I, Pierce Shepard, fuckin' despise you God of Hannah! I spit on you! I would piss on you if given a chance!" He was now yelling. He didn't care who heard … He wanted to make sure that the god of Hannah heard his cries of despair. Really heard them … no felt his words of hate. "Did you hear that Hannah? I hate your FUCKIN' God. I said the F word and to your God. Your empty, selfish God. There is no reason … NONE … That he should have taken you. You should be here with Eli and me … Tell me Hannah's God, why you took her now! Why did you take her from her home? I hate you!"

Pierce heard movement and through his tear-filled eyes he saw Hannah approaching. She looked so much younger, so beautiful and she was saying something. As she got closer he realized that it wasn't his wife but their daughter, "Daddy? It's okay daddy." Shepard got on her knees and hugged her crying father. "If momma were here she would say that there is a reason why this happened. We may not know today or tomorrow, but ..." Pierce had broken down and as Shepard cradled her father, fighting back her own tears, she looked up into the same sky her father had shaken his fist at. _Please momma. Help me understand. I can't do this all alone. I'm scared. Daddy needs you and I don't know how to help him_.

Shepard had put her father to bed after dinner, taken Moonie some food and water out in the garage, then took out her mother's Bible. She sat in her mother's place at the kitchen table and thought of all the times she saw her mother sitting here, tea in hand, netbook open and this Bible. She heard the ticking of the clock in the living room, looked around her mother's kitchen that was filled with food from friends and neighbors … "Momma," Shepard whispered as she began to cry. She was lost in her own grief and did not hear her best friend come in through the back door. Ricky had brought his Pepe Le Pew that Shepard had always wanted and he placed it on the table as he bent down next to her.

"Pepe and I were in the neighborhood," He whispered as he brushed back his best friend's hair and then pulled her to him. "Ah, Shep … I always knew that you were some weepy girl."

Shepard would have laughed at his lame jokes but the pain was too much. She couldn't pull herself from the grief, from the hole in her heart, from the absolute despair she was feeling. "Ricky, it hurts," was all she could get out before the tears won. Ricky just held her and after she had cried herself to total exhaustion, he carried her to bed. As she curled up, he sat next to her and rubbed her back. He had always loved her. She was his best friend, his platonic soul mate as far as he was concerned. "Everything will get better." He whispered. "I won't leave you Shepard. Not even Elnora can pull me away."

Shepard had fallen asleep and Ricky was about to leave when a piece of jewelry on her nightstand caught his eye. He stopped and looked at it before he left ... looked at the prothean gift from the asari on Illium.


	24. Rook Aglow

The prothean wall of Kyuos on Aethoyner always took Liara's breath away with its vivid shades of red, orange and yellow. Zazzy was standing next to her, mouth open and for the first time that Liara had known him, speechless. "Didn't I tell you," Liara almost giggled. "Pictures cannot capture the colors, the shapes or the texture. Touch it!"

Zazzy looked at Liara to re-confirm that it was okay to touch. She nodded with a big grin on her face. Zazzy began running his fingers over the wall as he closely examined the ideograms. "Remarkable. Coated?"

"Yes. I tried running a test on the substance last time I was here, but I couldn't get any to come off. Tried everything but whatever it is, it is there to stay." Zazzy went back to examining it and Liara began doing an audit on the kits. The 2 asari team members were carefully setting up the work stations while the fifth team member, a salarian named Pich, had stayed on Illium doing additional research on the discs and on standby to upload or ship anything the crew needed. "Zazzy? Did you bring the Flat Panel detectors?"

Zazzy was pushing his finger into one of the grooves, "Really remarkable."

"Zazzy?" Liara turned around and saw her co-worker now tapping against the wall as he hummed. "Dr. Kish, did you bring the FPD's?"

"Liara, did you notice the different depths of the … what?" Zazzy looked over at her, "Oh. Yes. FPD's in other bag."

Now it was Liara's turn to ignore him, "Different depths … Oh, by the Goddess!" She was now digging through the bags looking for a Sonas. "Why didn't I notice?"

"Simple. Salarians quicker." Zazzy said matter-of-factly as he dug through another bag for the FPD's. "Asari slow. Not as slow as elcor. But. Was stuck on elevator with 2 elcor once. Four hours. Wanted to kill myself ... No, make that them. Wanted to kill the elcor."

Liara gave Zazzy a sour face as she took the Sonas and began comparing matching images. She then grabbed a data pad and started marking the readings and after comparing six identical images she bit her bottom lip, scrunched her nose, shook her head and began the process over. Zazzy and the two asari, Tila and Vesta, looked on as Liara ran back and forth, measuring, comparing, taking notes. "A code. Zazzy, this wall is in code! Isn't that wonderful?"

"Code?" Zazzy tapped his cheek. "Hmmm. Why would they write this in code?"

Liara pulled him closer to the wall, "They didn't. I mean … they did. But not the original authors. After it was written, years later … maybe thousands of years … need to research."

Liara turned to get her data pad when Zazzy grabbed her and re-faced the wall, "Explain."

"Oh, yes. Someone else came along long after this was here and in the communication already on the wall, they put a secondary message. They changed the depth of certain images but not every image. So they would have set up some kind of pattern … See how this …this … thing, er …" Both Liara and Zazzy looked at the image, tilting their heads trying to figure out what they were looking at, "Uh, Zaz what would you call that?"

Zazzy stepped closer, "A plant? A spiky plant with …" they looked closer, "legs?"

Liara looked even closer, "Okay. See this spiky plant with legs? It is only 2 inches deep." Then she stepped over to a repeat of that image, "But this … this is 3.3 inches deep."

Zazzy took the Sonas from her and measured himself. "Interesting. But. It could be as a result of the years wearing down the-"

"I thought that too," Liara interrupted. "But they measure either 2 or 3.3 … exactly! No, Zaz, this was intentional. And I had wondered why there was a coat on the wall." Liara was almost shouting as things began to fall in to place. "The coat was applied to preserve the information. Do you know what this means, Zazzy?"

"Two codes to break?" Zazzy asked as Liara turned back to her data pad. "Two codes. Yes. At least 400 images … add the …" Liara had stopped listening to his calculations as she pulled out her netpad. Zazzy stopped his calculations and looked at Liara, "But why the message?"

"A code normally means conflict? War?" Liara looked up at Zazzy.

"Probable." Zazzy corrected. "Codes needed for secrecy. Not good when secrets are needed. War indeed. But who?"

Liara, fingers tapping furiously on her netpad, responded, "We will need to break the first code then the second. I just have to …"

"Why not focus on the second code?" Vesta asked.

"Simple." Zazzy responded. "Secondary code tied to first. Must know original meaning to understand the change. Elcor."

Vesta rolled her eyes, "One of these days Zazzy!"

* * *

"Who?" Tatiaria asked as she and her sister lounged in her main courtyard facing the fountain.

"Saren Arterius." Benezia answered as she took a sip of thopevo.

"Sister, why would you receive him in your home?" Tatiaria asked. "And why was he even here on Thessia? Only trouble can follow someone like him!"

* * *

Benezia had been surprised when she had been awakened by her private companion, Kyriake Alexakis, in the middle of the night. She had agreed to see the turian in her reading room and asked that her companion put additional security around Liara's room. "Until he is completely removed from the estate no one is to enter her suite." As she walked in, she saw Saren looking at a picture of Liara and casually walked over, retrieved the picture and put it back in its place, "Saren Arterius, to what do I owe the honor?"

"Please, the honor is all mine." He responded. "I apologize for the late hour but I needed to see you as soon as I arrived. I was hoping for a private audience with you."

Benezia looked at her three acolytes in the room and motioned them away. She was not concerned about her safety, Saren was no match for the Matriarch and both knew it. Her only concern or weakness in the home was currently tucked in bed and now heavily guarded. As the room cleared, Benezia turned to walk outside but saw her daughter over on her own terrace, _no daughter … do not come here. Go back to bed now. There is danger here_. She quickly closed the room off instead but not before Saren had looked over at her daughter. Benezia motioned to a seat next to hers, "Please have a seat, SpecTRe."

"I did not realize that your daughter was back in your graces." Saren said as he continued to stand.

"She was never out of my grace." Benezia answered as she sat in her chair and re-motioned for him to sit.

"Of course." Saren walked over to a bookshelf and began looking through her collection. "I understand that you have not embraced the new species yet."

"The humans?" Benezia asked as she smoothed her yellow robe.

"The humans." Saren repeated.

"One should never trust too quickly, as it would be foolish. But I do not believe that I have ever made a public statement either for or against them."

"Your Councilor did not support their requests against the batarians."

"That was my understanding," Benezia answered. "But I am not the Councilor, SpecTRe."

"Aren't you?" Saren laughed, "She would no more choose her own mate than make a decision without your approval."

Benezia did not like how he seemed to know things that were only privy to a few … and all of whom were asari. She also did not like how this conversation was blunt and without veiled messages, preferring to speak as an asari. Saying nothing but revealing much … The turian lacked the finesse to participate in that kind of conversation. So the Matriarch had to readjust herself, "I'm afraid that you give me too much credit for how the Councilor administers her duties. I did however suggest that we monitor the behavior and actions of this new species before we make a judgment."

"Monitor … Ah, yes. Monitor." Saren said with a slight tinge of disgust in his voice as he picked a book off a shelf. "While you asari stand back and ponder, the humans are working towards taking control. Give them half a chance and they will be at the head of the Council … that is, if they don't destroy it first and have your daughters at their cocks."

Benezia shifted on the image of her daughter subjugated to any species. "I do not want to seem rude, but I have appointments very early so if you don't mind I will take my leave."

As Benezia went to rise, Saren slapped the book closed and looked at her, "I am about to change where the galactic power lies and in the process put the humans where they belong. Our species were developing the arts, science and language while they were rolling in their feces and afraid of fire. The thought that these filthy diseases think that they should be equal … equal to us. The arrogance. They must be brought not to their knees but on to their stomachs."

Benezia realized that Saren was not talking hollow words as he was not given to empty threats, and this concerned her. "And how do you plan on doing this?"

Saren stepped closer to Benezia, "With your assistance, Matriarch Benezia. I wish that I could sit down and share my plans with you but not just yet. I just came here to ask that you come to me when I call in the future. There, at the place of appointment, will I be able to share the plans. I had hoped that if I came personally that you would see how important my request was."

Benezia looked at Saren, thinking that she should just kill him at that very moment when a flash caught her eye. Destruction was on his hip, one move and he could light her estate up … _Liara_. Saren had attached a light but powerful strip bomb to his hip and Benezia realized that with the dialogue shift she was not thinking clearly. She had never thought of violence before manipulation, ever. _Stop thinking of Liara ... Stop thinking like a … a … mother. Think like a Matriarch. _"Yes, I can see that the request is important to you. But you will forgive me if I cannot give an answer at this time. I must think on this."

Saren angrily stepped forward and then stopped. He looked over at the picture of Liara and purred, "Think? Don't think so long that the humans are moving into this estate of yours. If you don't want your daughter with her legs spread just to please a human or put to work in one of their mines … you will join me."

_Liara. There it is. Yes, Saren, she is my weakness, but I will kill you before you hurt her._ "I thank you for your concern regarding my home and daughter. But I can assure you that my estate is quite secured under the T'Soni name … as to my daughter. Liara is bright and not considered foolish. I do not see her crawling into anyone's bed unless she desired it."

"Really?" Saren clenched. "Have you not heard of the humans who just take what they want? They are like the batarians as they think nothing of forcing their will to get what they want. But unlike the batarians they hide their greed behind their political ideologies and base emotions. They are a blight that needs to be wiped out before it is too late."

"Saren, I have met a few humans on the Citadel. They appeared no more violent or aggressive than a …" Benezia stopped before she said turian. "Well, let's just say that they can be pleasant at times."

Saren went back to Liara's picture, picked it up and looked at Benezia, "You really should think about what the humans have done and will do … I would think that one might find it unbearable if they had been partly responsible for the violation or even death of their off-spring. There are humans that are known for hunting ruins for financial gain and have on occasion raped and murdered the scientists and researchers there. Pity if your daughter was on a site, defenseless and alone only to be approached by these humans."

Benezia caught herself smiling, the sight of her daughter in a prothean dig site against someone. If anyone could survive, Liara could despite herself. She saw faceless humans being set on fire, jewelry causing bloodshed and paintings knocking them out. "SpecTRe," Benezia answered as she kept from laughing, "I assure you that Liara is quite capable of taking care of herself."

Saren gripped the picture and a small crack appeared, "You know what they think of your species? Even sitting here on Thessia ... you must know what is being said about the asari by the humans."

"What has always been said," Benezia responded without emotion. "My species has become use to the lies and assumptions that have followed us long before the humans were part of the galactic community … It has always been my species that has tried to understand the different thoughts, needs, desires … what drives others while we have been rewarded with quick and ill-informed assessments of who we are … so why should they be any different?"

Saren placed the picture down and headed for the door, "When you realize that I am right and you will … That the humans need to be removed … You know how to contact me."

"Of course." Benezia responded as he marched out.

* * *

"He needs my assistance," Benezia answered her sister.

"Please tell me that you didn't align yourself with him."

"Of course not," Benezia answered as she slowly stood and looked at the spot where her daughter had stood once asking for her grace. "But I am considering it ..." _to protect my daughter_.

"No, Benezia!" Tatiaria said as she stood and touched her sister's arm. "I have heard things of that SpecTRe. He will do anything to complete a task … anything, sister."

"I'm well aware of that, sister." Benezia said. "That is why I must find out what he is up to. I need to make sure that our daughters are not put in harm's way because of his actions."

"Go to the Councilor," Tatiaria begged. "I feel that he has darkness, death around him."

"I cannot," Benezia replied remembering him telling her things that only her inner circle knew. Someone was reporting back to him and until she knew who, no one could be trusted. "It is my duty to try and steer him on to a much gentler path. But before that, I must see that Liara is put somewhere safe before I move forward."

"What about that project slated for 2190? Can you pull it forward?" Tatiaria asked.

"Yes," Benezia said. "But I can only pull it by 8 maybe 10 years … Until then, I must look at where she is in her current project."

* * *

"You moved it." Liara said.

"No. No I did not." Zazzy countered.

"Yes you did! You put the rook on that spot, I saw you!"

"I didn't put it down. As long as I am still touching it … it can be put back."

Liara looked suspiciously at the salarian, "Where are the rules?"

The team had packed up for the night and set up their tents at the campgrounds just a mile down from the work site. While Tila and Vesta were already in their tent asleep, Zazzy and Liara were playing chess at a table in the community area. Unlike the last time that Liara was here, the place was almost empty. The weather was at its worst this time of year and sweat was running off her. She had stripped down to tan shorts, matching tube top and sandals while Zazzy seemed perfectly fine in his standard lab outfit. As Zazzy made his next move the quiet of the camp was murdered by a group of humans that appeared out of nowhere complaining about the heat, humidity, food, accommodations and the prices of the souvenirs. Zazzy sighed and looked over, "Please. Please. May we have quiet? No more complaints. Bad. Bad."

The humans looked over at Zazzy and the bigger of the females glared back, "Who the hell do you think you are? No one tells me to shut up! No one!"

Liara cringed and whispered, "Please Zaz, just ignore them."

"Impossible. Humans too loud." Zazzy responded. He then turned in his chair to face the woman, "Large female. Not say to shut up. I requested quiet. Understand?" As Zazzy turned back to the board game, Liara knew that this was not going to end well.

The woman began yelling obscenities and told her mate, who was smaller than her, to do something. He sighed then walked over to Zazzy, "I cannot let you talk to my wife like that. Apologize."

Zazzy looked up at the man, "No. Apology would be insincere. Offensive to both."

The man looked at Zazzy with his mouth open and then went to punch him. Before his fist could connect Zazzy had moved and the man fell over the now empty chair as Zazzy jumped on his back. The wife screamed and the other male was so busy leering at Liara that the wife began punching on him. "Help Titus! Don't just stand there!"

Liara made a mental note to stay properly covered, no matter how uncomfortable, in the future as she heard the man, apparently named Titus, screaming high pitched as Zazzy called out each action made, "Punch to eye. Missed. Counter with sweeping minv movement. Connect. Opponent scream. Bite …"

The leering male was finally pushed to join the fray as his friend was crying for his wife, "Lucy! Help!" Liara began to panic, because she had never been in a real physical fight. She had always been able to elude the pirates and scavengers that lurked around dig sites in the past. Sure, she had been trained in the asari martial arts for over 30 years but she had never been in any type of real fight. The wife, assuming that Liara would try and help her friend, came at her with the other female tagging along. They started grabbing her, "Oh, no slut! You aren't going to do anything!" As their hands began touching her, Liara panicked. The women began pulling and pushing as Liara, all sweaty, began to wiggle free. The smaller female went to slap Liara but she hit the bigger female instead as Liara had dropped to the ground and was crawling away. The bigger woman screamed, "No one slaps me!" and slapped her friend back. The two women then began to scream, pull hair, slap and before Liara knew it … they were on the ground fighting each other.

That turn of events caught Liara off-guard and she would have kept watching them in shock had she not heard Zazzy, "Head butt. Ouch. Losing. Ouch. Digit to eye." Liara picked up the chess board, knocking the pieces everywhere and hit the second man over the head. As he came up after her she ran around the fire. On their second pass around the fire, Liara lost a sandal and stumbled … the man chasing her didn't stop in time and he tripped over her and into the fire. Liara scrambled to pull him out and his wife seeing him on fire stopped fighting her friend and pulled Liara away from him. Liara ran over to where Zazzy and the man were struggling and as she started to pull them apart, the larger woman pulled Liara back tearing off her tube top_, will definitely stay in full gear in the future, _Liara thought as she saw her top next to the fire. The woman then pulled Zazzy up off the ground and slapped him two times, yelling at him and then tossed him on Liara. They both fell to the ground, with Zazzy on top. "No shirt. Inappropriate. Asari though. Should be expected." He commented with his face mere inches from her breasts.

Liara pushed him off her and as she rose up, she saw her bracelet on the ground next to where she had fallen and as she stood to get it the woman still angry ran at her. The thought that the gift from the human might be broken made Liara angry and her biotics flared. With one sweep of the hand, the woman was thrown 10 feet, landing on Tila and Vesta's tent. As the two asari came crawling out of their collapsed tent screaming, Liara was picking up the bracelet and saw that the clasp was bent. She breathed a sigh of relief that she could fix it as Zazzy came limping over. "Unacceptable. You owe me a new chess board."


	25. The Eastwood Boogie

Pierce was playing 'Chess Board Boogie' on the porch, or really just hitting the chords. Music had always been his way out when things got tough, when they got hard. Play a couple tunes and you couldn't help but feel somewhat better. But every song, every chord, and the silence in between reminded him of her. He looked towards the open door leading into the living room and he could see her standing there smiling. No matter where he looked, Hannah's ghost was present. He would try and pretend that she was off at church or helping somewhere and that she would be home later. But then later came and it wasn't Hannah preparing dinner, no prayer by her at mealtime, no chatter at the dinner table about everyone's day, no "preacher" lessons for Eli, no pulling down the bed covers as they tossed pillows to the side or at each other, no place to wrap his arms … no Hannah.

She had only been gone 4 days and he felt that he had been living in a fog since. He knew that he needed to pull himself together, be the father that Hannah's Elizabeth needed and as he sat looking at the empty spot on the porch swing, her spot, the spot that she had last been alive … _Hannah, why can't you be here now? I know, I know … I have to get my act together, I know how upset you would be if you saw how Eli is carrying the weight_. Pierce closed his eyes just to try and see her more clearly sitting next to him, patting his leg and smiling as he continued to haphazardly pluck the strings. _Just as soon as I can breathe again. I promise, Hannah, I'll take the load. I just … can't … can't … breathe without … you. _He could hear their daughter in the kitchen, hear her cleaning up.

For the past few days she had made sure that he got up, showered, dressed, ate, slept. Hell, the kid had even shaved him once, just for the memorial service. _One more fuckin' funeral in Georgia and then they'll put you in the … _the vision of dirt being thrown on her, a woman so strong and caring, caused him to choke … _god, no_. The tears fought to be released but Pierce had cried too much, hell he was keeping a headache from all the crying, so he tilted his head back and took a deep breath. _Not today. I will not cry today, dammit!_

* * *

Shepard was in the kitchen cleaning the counters now that all the food had been taken by the church ladies and Stu had picked up Moonie and her fish. Pierce and Shepard, along with the body of Hannah, were set to fly out for Earth in the early AM. Hannah had always said that if something should ever happen she wanted to be buried in Pierce's family cemetery in Georgia. She wanted to know that she would be next to Pierce and one day their daughter. Plots were already set for them with Pierce and Hannah side by side … and her Whisper to her left. Not that Hannah spoke of her death often, but she had always thought that it was important that the responsibilities of the burying made as easy on their daughter as possible. So she had made all the future arrangements on their last visit. "Preacher, are you planning on us dying soon?" Pierce had joked as they sat with his parents at the Crowley's Funeral Home. Hannah had patted her husband on the arm and joked that with them increasing their joint life insurance that she was planning on his slipping in the shower. And with her and their daughter taking that money and buying a home in the south of France, wouldn't have time to bury him. Hannah always could throw him with her rare display of humor.

Shepard could hear her dad just plucking the chords of his guitar and looked over at her mother's Bible sitting on the kitchen table. Pierce had been pretty much a zombie after his rant at the night sky and Shepard was worried about him. She had always known that her father's world had revolved around her mother … now his world was gone. Aunt Birgit and Stu were constantly hanging out at the house, helping her with him as well as getting the house closed up for the trip. The two helpers had went to work that morning so Shepard had gotten up early, slipped on the yellow summer dress that her mother had just recently made for her and as an afterthought had even pinned the prothean jewelry over her heart, just like her mother had done just a week past. "Here Elizabeth, it should complement the yellow." She looked in the mirror at her reflection and could see her mother's eyes looking back. _I hurt momma. But I'll be strong, I promise._

Now mid-day, Shepard peeked out at her dad, saw him with his head laid back and wished that her mother was there, wished that she could be with him on that porch. _Elizabeth, I need you to be strong for him. He isn't strong like us_. She could hear her mother say. She picked up the Bible and took it out with her on the front porch, "Dad?"

Pierce brought his head down and looked at his daughter, eyes swollen and red ... his face unshaven, hair unbrushed. _Get your act together, fuckwit!_ He growled internally at himself. "Yes, Eli?"

"Momma never flew without her Bible," Shepard said holding it up. "Can you take it to her? They can put it in her coffin so on the flight …" Shepard could see her mom sitting and reading it mid-flight and she couldn't get the rest of the words out. _It's okay … you can't let him see you cry. Keep it together; you have to be the strong one._

"No, Eli." Pierce said putting his guitar down and standing up. "Preacher woman would want you to have it … to read it."

Shepard walked over to him and tucked his shirt into his jeans and then handed him the Bible, "I'll get it back in Georgia. But it wouldn't be right for her last flight … that she doesn't have it. Please."

Pierce looked at his daughter, "You look like her. Her eyes, nose, shape of her face and her spirit. You and her are the most beautiful things I have ever seen … so beautiful."

Shepard reached up and kissed her father's chin, "I know pop! But I have your plush lips!"

Pierce half-smiled, put the Bible on the porch swing where his wife always sat, took his daughter's face in his hands, pressed his forehead against hers, "I love you, Eli. I'm gonna be back on my feet soon … okay? I promise I'll shape up." He then kissed her on the lips, smiled and grabbed the Bible. "I'll see that she gets this. And I'll tell her that you love her."

As Shepard watched her father jump into his jeep, she smiled. "Don't drink too much at the pub!" Pierce nodded back at her; _smart like her mother too!_ … He winked at his daughter, forcing a grin and for the last time he saw his kid, his Eli.

* * *

Fire, flashbangs, screams, smoke, flame throwers, pushing, blood, artillery, crying, prayers … everything was smashed together in Shepard's mind. There was so much going on around her that she had a sensory overload; all she wanted was to curl up in a ball. At some point she found herself being pulled by her hair and surrounded by batarians. She could hear Tait screaming "No! Elizabeth!" as one of the batarians pushed her, but nothing was registering. Where was her father? Where was Aunt B? What was happening?

Just hours before she had been at her home packing her father's suitcase … Ricky and Tyler had dropped by to see if she would like to go cliff diving with them, but she still hadn't packed herself so she had declined. They had offered to stay and help but Shepard had told them to go and jump for her. Just as they were leaving, Tait had arrived and asked if she would go have lunch with him at the Comet Café. She had at first said no, but he gave one of his smiles and so they had walked the 5 miles, Tait telling her that she needed the exercise to help clear her head. He was right ... the walk had felt good with the cool breeze and Shepard began to pretend that everything was normal. She had even stopped and kissed Tait as if she didn't have a care in the world. If only for a minute she had felt normal … but that minute ended when the batarian strike hit. There was absolute confusion, panic and blood. There was so much blood in the first wave and Shepard was lost as her and Tait were herded through the streets. A portion of the batarians had dropped down on Main Street pulling people from the businesses, residences, anywhere and pushing them to the town's main park. The local police force was completely caught off guard and was quickly put down. Shepard tried to see if Aunt B was among the dead as she was pushed down the street.

The females were being quickly segregated from the males, while the children were screaming as the batarians implanted something in their heads and then placed them into cages. Parents fought to save their children and were either set on fire, shot or beaten to death. Shepard saw two of her school friends and as they huddled together a batarian named Manok looked at her. Shepard was trying to stay strong as her mother had been; trying to calm her friends and that strength … posture caught his attention. He liked how humans were easily subdued, made to fear, cry, but this human_._ What was simply her trying to help was taken as arrogance by Manok._ Defiant human. We will see how long you keep that arrogance_. He thought to himself as he called two of his comrades and pointed at her. She saw him at the last moment as he motioned towards her and knew that this was not going to end well, so she tried to blend into the crowd but he moved quick and caught her by the arm, pulling her towards Rurik's Grocers. She struggled against him as they continued on and she wished that she hadn't worn the sun dress and sandals … That she had been in running shoes, cargo pants and t-shirt. _Please God, help me. Please. _

Tait saw her being led away and called out her name … Behind her he began fighting his way to try and save her. Shouts were heard and Manok turned around to see the human running towards them. He laughed, looked at Shepard and began walking towards the running male. As he got a little closer he pulled out his pistol and without missing a step shot Tait in the head. The young boy ran a few steps more, dropped to his knees and then fell face first in the ground. Shepard screamed for Tait as Manok stood over him, unzipped and while looking at Shepard pissed on the body. Shepard felt the rage kick in and would have attacked the batarian if his two friends had not held her back as they all laughed. Manok could see the fire in the human and thought how wonderful it was going to be to break this one_, you will beg before I am through_. He picked her up as she swung at him and threw her over his shoulder, laughing.

Once inside the Grocers, the three batarians were saying things to each other, making noises that she didn't understand. Mindoir didn't see many aliens and only then in the port passing through, so most colonists didn't have translators, Shepard being one and if they did they only uploaded the various human languages, and nothing more … All of the communication among the trio was a mystery to her. Had she understood she would have heard Manok tell his comrades that she was his but once he was done they could take a turn. Shepard began to understand her fate when Manok pushed her to the floor, got on his knees, ripped her sundress as he pulled off her underwear and began unzipping. As he pulled her by the legs to him, there was a loud crash and gunfire that stopped Manok in his tracks. The batarian to the left had half his head blown off and the batarian on the right was now crouched low looking for the intruder. Manok was lying on top of Shepard, looking in the direction of the gunfire as well. Shepard could smell his breath and wanted to gag; she could also feel a part of him against her bare leg and began to struggle to get away from it. He muttered something and punched her in the ribs, knocking the air out of her. As she struggled to breathe, Manok motioned to his partner who then crawled away from them.

Shepard tried to cry out, to warn whoever was there but she couldn't catch her breath. Manok had pressed harder against her as he continued to look around, and along with his breathing, Shepard heard shuffling, footsteps, creaks and then a loud crash, a struggle, then gunfire. Heavy footsteps were heard and then Mr. Rurik's body was thrown next to her by the batarian and she heard the two laughing. Mr. Rurik was a man in his 80's, kind and friendly to everyone. Because of her, he had risked his life and lost … just like Tait. _God, please just let me die. Don't let anyone else die because of me._

As she lay looking into his vacant eyes, Manok began to re-position her, spreading her legs farther apart, his hips moving about as he prepared to enter her. Shepard remembered Tait saying, "I want to be your only" and now this animal who had killed him … pissed on him … was trying to take what should have just been his. As he entered her and began to move about, she turned away from him, tears streaming down her face as he began to grunt. She tried to float away but her rage wouldn't let her … wouldn't let her leave or deny what was happening to her. He had held her wrists as he tried to drive her into complete submission, as he tried to make her cry out, beg … but he saw anger and not fear and it made him drive harder. Had he really known her he would have seen that he was too close and that she was no longer able to think much less fear. As he pushed in once again she reached up and with her teeth dug in to the right side of his face. He roared out in pain as she continued to bite and twist, taking a chunk out of his face. Without hesitation, she spit out his flesh and bit down again. His comrade began to yell as Manok struggled to get free, choking her. She temporarily lost consciousness and in that brief moment, he was freed. He rolled off of her, trying to stop the bleeding as his comrade began punching her in the face. She could taste blood, both Manok's and hers and her breathing became harder as Manok stood and kicked her in the side. He kicked her a few more times as his partner looked for something to stop his bleeding. As he kicked at her in a rage, she curled up on her left side facing an endcap of merchandise. The pain was extreme and in trying to get as far away from the pain she focused on the endcap. How long the beaten went on she never knew, but what she did know was that the pickaxe was on sale for 80 credits, that was the last thing that she remembered before she blacked out.

* * *

The Sheriff had been hiding on the roof opposite the grocers with two of her deputies and 33 of the town folk, 18 adults and the remainder children. She had watched when Shepard arrived and had kept her Helix close by biding her time until she saw Shepard being taken into the grocery store. _Hold on Eli_. She had thought as she turned to instruct her deputies on what to do if she didn't return. They had begged her not to go but this was her Eli. Hannah's daughter. Pierce's daughter. Shit, her daughter. No, B was not about to let something bad happen to her butterfly as long as she had breath left in her body. "Listen, once it is dark get them out of town and up into the hills, okay?" She then quickly began moving about the rooftops, making her way towards Shepard. _Don't fuck this up, B. You gotta get the kid to safety_. It had taken her longer than she had expected to get across the street and back up on the roofs … But she finally had made it to the store and carefully dropped down in the alley. _The kid's alright ... please be alright_, she said to herself as she pulled the back door open and quietly entered the store moving cautiously through the aisles looking for the batarians and Eli.

By the time she arrived Shepard was out as Manok was pulling his pistol and aiming it at her. Before he could pull the trigger, B aimed her _Eastwood Special_, as she like to call her antique Smith & Wesson .44 Magnum and dropped him. His comrade jumped and looked towards her just as she introduced him to Clint as well. Then she looked at Eli, the torn underwear across the floor and the batarian with a part of his face torn, pants open and knew partly what had happened. She checked her kid's vitals, took a deep breath when she caught a pulse, then stood and kicked the batarian with the damaged face. "Get too close to my tough kid?" B almost spit at him as she turned him over with her boot, then spread his legs, aimed and fired. She knew that she might need that bullet later, but … she put it down to being an Aunt … and being Swedish.

B looked at Mr. Rurik and shook her head ... he had been a good man. He didn't deserve this ... hell, none of them did. She then heard a noise to her left and as she swung around Ricky put up both his hands, "It's me Sheriff! Ricky Parks!"

B stepped between Ricky and Shepard, "Whatever you see here, you must never breathe a word. Understand?" Ricky nodded as B turned towards Shepard. Ricky saw that Shepard had been abused ... raped ... and hot tears came into his eyes. He looked over at the mutilated, in more ways than one, batarian ... He wanted to kick him where the Sheriff had left her mark, but B was telling him to get some clothes for Shepard. He looked at the Souvenir rack that Mr. Rurik had just put up not a month ago and pulled down a black 'Mindoir! Dig It!' t-shirt that he and Shepard had died laughing at when they first saw it, along with a pair of black swim trunks. B took the clothes from Ricky and replaced the torn sundress with them.

As B tossed the sundress to the side, Ricky saw the jewelry and stopped B, "Shepard will want that. It was the pastor's." He removed it from the dress and he pinned it on her shirt. He saw how beaten she was and he fought back crying, "Tyler's waiting just inside the backdoor."

"How did you know I was here?" She asked.

"We were hiding behind the trash bin and saw you come off the roof." Ricky answered as he grabbed some Snickers. B looked at him putting the Snickers in his pockets, "What?" He asked, "They're Shepard's favorite … she'll need to eat."

_The kid's smarter than he looks_, she thought. _Or all those years hanging out at the Shepard home has taught him some things_. Everyone would need to eat so she had him get a couple shopping bags and fill them with quick and easy food and water. Tyler could carry the load as her and Ricky carried Shepard back. Getting her up onto the roof would be a struggle, _but we'll get you there butterfly_.


	26. A Game of Risk

A butterfly with wings that extended at least a foot each was seen flying out of a raging fire and it moved around Liara causing her to feel warmth and peace. She reached out towards it and the butterfly fluttered against her softly as a sweet sound came out of it ... the sound made her think of that pretty human music and she started to laugh as she ran with it following her ... Liara had never seen anything as beautiful with its brightly colored wings and they left gold and green dust on her as it fluttered about. She loved how it almost mirrored her movements and so she began to sway ... it swayed.

As Liara and the butterfly danced about each other she suddenly heard her mother call out to her, "Liara? Daughter, bring it to me."

"Mother?" She looked around until she saw the Matriarch off in the distance standing on a black mound. The mound seemed to breathe below her ... black oil bubbling around it but the Matriarch did not seem to notice it. She was completely focused on the butterfly.

The matriarch pulled her eyes off the butterfly and looked at Liara with a cold smile ..."Liara, do not be afraid ... just bring it to me softly."

"Mother, isn't it beautiful?" She smiled back as the butterfly moved behind her and away from the Matriarch, "Can I keep it?"

"No, Liara ... it is dangerous." The Matriarch's smile vanished, "It will spoil you ... defile you. You must bring it to me so that it can be silenced. So you can be safe from its lies."

Liara looked at it and didn't understand. It was beautiful and as it moved closer to her she felt such a joy. "But mother ... it won't harm me. Don't you see how wonderful it is?"

"Liara, do not question me," the Matriarch had answered, her face turning angry and dark. "Bring it to me ... It must die!"

Liara was confused as she looked at it and back at her mother. It did not feel wicked ... it made her feel at peace. But she could not disobey her mother ... she could not disobey the Matriarch so she began to walk slowly towards her mother leading the butterfly along the way. "Mother, please don't hurt it. If you would just look at it ... can't you see how peaceful it is?"

"Just bring it closer, daughter."

Liara hesitated but then started moving slowly again and just as the butterfly was within the Matriarch's reach ... she pulled out a large yellow snake which scared Liara, "Mother!"

The Matriarch stood still as she coldly instructed her daughter, "Do not move Liara!" as the snake slithered through her hands.

As it went racing towards the butterfly, Liara felt her heart beat harder and she moved in-between the snake and the butterfly begging her mother to spare it ... To spare the butterfly and kill the snake in its place. "Please mother!"

"Liara! You must trust me ... this butterfly must die!"

Just as the snake raised its head and opened its mouth to eat the butterfly ... Liara screamed and then it ... and then it ... Liara came awake with a start.

* * *

_Why are you dreaming about human insects and reptiles and mother?_ Liara thought as she discovered tears running down her cheeks. As she wiped them on her sheets she sat up on her cot and her mind quickly went to the 4 humans not far in the campground and frowned_. Of course, that must be why_.

She got up and looked at the time ... It was at least two hours before the team would get up but Liara, drenched in sweat, already out of her cot and still slightly shaken by the dream went to take a cold shower. Before she had left her tent, she had peeked out to see if the humans were around and once she felt sure that they were also still in their tents, she stepped quietly out and headed for the shower.

Zazzy got up as she was showering and put on breakfast ... he loved his friend but hated her cooking. Bleh! While Liara came from the very affluent, Zazzy did not have the pedigree needed to be worthy of mating back home on Rannadril and had very few friends but he had clicked with Liara almost from the start. They were an odd couple but somehow their friendship had worked. She was smarter than anyone that he had ever known and she had actually beaten him a few times at chess ... no one had ever done that before. Now as he cooked he heard his friend humming off in the distance and it made him smile. She had promised to take him to Serrice and let him actually sit in a box seat while watching the Serrice Delphinus play in their stadium! Him!Yes! He couldn't wait.

Once towel-dried, Liara got dressed and then poured herself a glass of cold water before heading back to her tent. On her way back she was surprised to see her friend already up and cooking. "Zazzy! It is too early for breakfast."

"Not too early," Zazzy frowned. "Breakfast should be eaten upon awakening. You awake. I awake. Breakfast."

"But Tila and Vesta aren't up yet," she scolded him.

"Then they starve." he answered as he made her plate. "Not my fault."

Liara shook her head at him as she took the plate and went over to a table, "You realize that they will be upset, don't you?"

Zazzy joined her as he sat across from her, ignoring the question, "Reports show weather to be excellent."

It was already heating up causing Liara to wonder what the heat must be like on his home planet. "You think this weather is excellent?"

"Sarcasm." Zazzy bit into his salarian version of a vege-pancake. Zazzy had seen some salarians eating eggs and it upset him ... "savages" he had called them in front of Liara. She had decided it was probably not wise to confess that she loved eggs as well so she just kept quiet and didn't eat them around him ... ever.

"Of course." Liara hated it when she failed to get a joke. That happened much more than she liked but ... what was one to do? "Zazzy, do you ever have nightmares?"

Zazzy began to tell her about a nightmare of flies, naked volus and eggs and she quickly regretted asking him.

The two ate breakfast, talking about skyball, the box seats and where they were located ... as well as the time that the Matriarch had taken Liara to meet the greatest player of all time ... Marcella T'Loak. Liara had told him that story at least twenty times but he loved it! "Shame that she retired."

"A shame." Liara frowned. "The Matriarch still attends functions that has her in attendance as well but ... I do not attend those."

"We will crash." Zazzy bounced on his seat and that caused Liara to laugh. She knew that he would but she wouldn't.

* * *

After breakfast and explaining to Zazzy why "crashing" asari functions was suicide she returned to her tent and while sitting at her small compact desk flipped open her netpad to check her messages. The main feed had late-breaking news regarding the human planet called Mindoir. It was currently under attack by batarians but Liara barely gave the headline a second glance or the planet a second thought as she closed the feed and opened her messages.

She quickly deleted the spam e-mails then focused on the messages from Sibila, Theia Tatiaria and eight from her Thessia Guildhall colleagues. Once finished with them she looked at the one unopened message. A communication from the Matriarch. She always opened her mother's e-mail last since she would re-read it multiple times making sure that she understood everything the Matriarch was trying tell her. As she began eating a sokolatí sweet she began reading …

LIARA,

SENDING MY DEEPEST THOUGHTS TO YOU. ACOLYTES ALL WANT TO SEND THEIR BLESSINGS AS WELL. TO BE HONEST THEY WISH THAT YOU WERE HERE. PROTECT YOUR EYES IN THE CAVERN PLEASE. DO NOT BE SO CARELESS AS LAST TIME AND NEED MEDICAL ATTENTION DUE TO DUST IN YOUR EYES. NOT THAT I AM TRYING TO TELL YOU HOW TO DO YOUR WORK. SEND ME VISUALS OF THE WALL 1ST CHANCE YOU GET. BACK UP YOUR RESEARCH IN CASE YOU LOSE THE NETPAD LIKE LAST YEAR.

MATRIARCH BENEZIA

Liara had frowned while reading the message, but also glad that her mother was once again a part of her life. Yes, she would always have words of instruction for her but Liara knew that she was blessed to have the Matriarch's time and wisdom shared with her. She then stared at the message again after digesting the top message. Correspondence from the Matriarch always included a secondary message and this was signed 'Matriarch Benezia' and not 'Mother' … so Liara looked at it again. "Always look for what stands out, Liara." The Matriarch had instructed her at a very young age. _What stands out_? Liara squinted and bit her bottom lip as she moved closer to the screen … _Yes, "1st"_ … Liara excited, read the first word of ever sentence and then frowned, "As you wish, mother." Liara got up and stretched as she thought about her mother's instruction.

The T'Soni Tower located downtown in Armali had just seen the start of the work day when the Matriarch received an urgent call from the Councilor. She had arrived there for her annual board meeting when she was notified so she went into the security and communication center, where four commandos were working ... two monitoring both the T'Soni estate and the tower, while the other two were reading constant updates on galactic activities. These positions required a quick reflex, high level of critical thinking and acute observation. This had been Liara's next job in the T'Soni Company after her seven years in Lusia and she had excelled at it as Benezia knew she would.

Liara had loved the challenge of balancing all the screen data, organizing it and the task to determine what was important enough for each level of management. Benezia would give her feedback on her performance and showed her ways to see the truth through the noise of information. The Matriarch had wanted her daughter to work in as many areas of her dynasty so that she would understand the different functions and roles that would one day be under her care ... so that when she took over the company she had a clear understanding of what her employees did ... For almost three years Liara worked in that room content until ... a message mentioned the protheans and a wall that had just been uncovered on Aethoyner. She wished that images of the wall were available but it was being seen only by approved researchers ... it was then that she had decided to return to the University and study them.

Liara had become curious about the protheans after the history book that her mother had given her and hearing descriptions and the possibility of what the wall might reveal brought it all back. Liara worked an extra month before getting her nerve up to tell her mother and when she had half-whispered her resignation and the reason to the Matriarch ... Benezia had laughed and pulled her daughter close. "This is only natural, Liara. Daughters must set their own paths and this is done by rejecting the path that their mother is on." _or the path that we try and put our daughters on_, she thought to herself. _While I push toward the future, you have turned to the past_. "I am glad to see that you are following a natural course of development. I was beginning to worry that you did not have a will of your own."

Benezia's memory of her daughter faded as she looked at the image of Councilor Tevos. The Councilor was seated in her office and telling the Matriarch, "We just received word a few short hours ago of the attack."

"Hours?" Benezia did not like information delayed.

"I met with the human Ambassador Anita Goyle to get a complete update before taking up some of your time, Matriarch."

Benezia did not like this turn of event and quickly thought of where her daughter was located. _The acolytes should be arriving there soon_. "And?"

Tevos explained how the batarians came out of nowhere and that they had come well prepared. The Alliance had only been 14 hours away but upon sending in ground troops, the marines were quickly pinned in. More Alliance ships were enroute but they were just under 96 hours out and by then both the Matriarch and Councilor knew that the raid would be over.

Benezia began rubbing her temples as she took in everything that she had been told. "What is the population?"

"Last census there was 16,000 colonists and another 5,000 employees and their families attached to the Mindoir Nokeic Mining Company. The mining company and area was said to be the first and hardest hit … all humans in that area are presumed dead by the Alliance. This is based on satellite pictures of the area."

Benezia could feel her stomach tighten and thought, _they must have determined that this part of Mindoir, these miners had the strength to challenge them and therefore needed to be removed at the start_. "Hmmm, weapons, lasers, explosives, strong humans, places to hide … smart tactical move."

"Your sources were correct," Tevos said. "Mindoir was the next target."

"As my sources always are … and you are sure that your informant met with both the Councilor and the Alliance?" Benezia upon obtaining the plans to strike had forwarded them to the Councilor for distribution. The asari could not be seen as aligning with either the humans or batarians, so they had the information given by an outside source.

"Yes." Tevos sighed. "I have full knowledge of the exchanges."

_As do I_, Benezia thought as she lowered her head and said more to herself, "They gambled and paid a much larger price than they expected."

"Matriarch?"

"The humans … the political fools let the attack happen. They placed a ship close by so that when it started they could limit the deaths … the loss."

"Why would they do that?"

"A multitude of reasons" Benezia's stomach was hurting. She had seen this absolute disregard for life so many times in so many different species … "This was just one more decision based on greed, arrogance, pride." She sat down and one of the commandos brought her water. As she took a drink she looked at a screen that showed her great hall at home. "They would show how the Alliance can act quickly on off-worlds when threatened gaining confidence of the humans … confidence that would encourage their Earth citizens towards more colonization as well as additional funding for the Alliance."

"But why let the batarians land at all? Why not stop them before a human life was lost?" Tevos asked.

Benezia tapped her nails against the arm rest as she contemplated the reasons, "They might have allowed the initial loss so that they could use it to deepen the divide between them and the batarians ... as well as use it to try and push you and the Council as a whole into taking sides. So many reasons, yet none of them honorable."

"So many deaths … You would have thought that living such short life spans they would value life so much more than us." Tevos would never understand other species' no matter how hard she tried.

"They did not expect to lose as many as they will." Benezia said, feeling spiritually tired at the repeat of needless pain. "They had planned for their marines to take the situation quickly under control. Now, the citizens of Mindoir will pay for the political maneuvering and military arrogance of those that should have been protecting them … and I fear that the price will be higher than even we know."

Tevos lowered her head, "Such needless pain … suffering. May the Goddess help them."

Benezia thought of past wars that she had been in … the death, loss and pain of it all and she felt anger at what had been risked. "But this species is quite skilled at covering its mistakes. Their politicians and military powers past behaviors and thought processes have shown me that they will try and turn it to their advantage."

"And be successful at it," the Councilor chimed in. "On that note … what do I tell the Ambassador Goyle in her request of our assistance?"

"Tell her that we understand the pain that she must feel but that we cannot at this time take any steps to assist. The humans have placed themselves in areas that make them vulnerable and the Alliance … the human Alliance needs to take the steps necessary to protect their own colonists."

"What about the people on Mindoir? Do we not send assistance then?"

"No," Benezia answered. "To do so would be to take sides and potentially fan the flames of war in the eyes of the batarians. The humans, like our own daughters, must experience failure and pain to learn wisdom. It is my hope that the humans will learn from this and grow."

"The innocent lives…" Tevos almost whispered as she looked at the galactic map containing Mindoir on her desk.

"Councilor," the Matriarch held up her hand, "you must know that by the time we arrived it would be too late. With or without us sending help … whatever happens there it is going to play out as is. We cannot change that now. Only the strong and determined will make it out alive."


	27. The Helix Butterfly

_Am I alive?_ Shepard thought as she slowly came to … The first thing that she was aware of was the night sky. There seemed to be stars moving about, trails of … she didn't know what. But the sky of Highland Falls ... of Mindoir was different. It was alive. _The night sky? Where am I? How long have I been out?_ Then the pain started creeping up as she realized that she could not get her left eye open and that the sound of … what was that sound of off to the south? "Am I dead?" she softly moaned.

"Not if I can help it," B whispered. "Now be quiet and stay still. We have batarians all around us." Shepard found breathing a little hard, her left eye closed shut and her tongue told her that she was missing a tooth or two or three. She heard B and her two deputies talking quietly as they looked out over the town. Shepard knew that there was really nothing her Aunt B or her men could do. They were outnumbered and the batarians had far superior weapons as well … Shepard was a kid, but she wasn't stupid. But she was glad to know that her Aunt B was there ... alive.

The two deputies left and Shepard could hear the gravel as they moved to the next roof. She could also hear batarian laughter that cut through all the other sounds and the thought of Manok hit her causing her to unconsciously reach between her legs. That's when she realized that she was wearing different clothes and knew that whoever found her … had seen ... the shame began to overtake her. Whoever found her knew, knew that she had been … B looked over at Shepard who was looking at her new clothes, holding herself and she carefully went over to her and whispered, "I found you, Eli. Just me." Shepard felt tears running down her face and B pulled her to her, "Not now, Butterfly. I need you to stay strong." Shepard nodded her head and B moved back to her position. _Aunt B is right. Stay strong. You can cry later. You can hurt later. But not now._

Shepard listened to her town ... listened to the new sounds of screaming, gunshot, buildings crumbling, fire … Highland Falls was being raped as she had been earlier. She felt her left eye and knew that if it looked half as bad as it felt. _Shit_. She knew that her eye was a small thing but she continued to focus on it ... her closed eye kept her mind off the rape, off the pain in her body, off her dad ... It kept her mind off Tait, Ricky, Tyler, everybody. As if on cue, Ricky and Tyler appeared next to her. "Miss me?" Ricky tried joking before they hugged one another. "You didn't think that you were getting rid of me that easy did you?"

She pulled away and hugged Ty just as an explosion went off to the south. "The Alliance." Ty whispered as he pulled his jacket tighter, "They've been trying to save us … but the batarians aren't giving an inch from what Ricky and I saw."

"I have to break up with you," Ricky grinned. "I like my girls with two good eyes. You understand one-eyed Pete, right?"

Ricky always did make jokes at the worst possible times, but it made her smile just as her stomach started to growl. Ricky grinned even bigger and pulled out a candy bar from his jacket pocket. He then waved the Snickers under her nose. "Snickers from an excellent year, 2170."

"More like 2070," Tyler corrected. "It was at Mr. Rurik's and you know how that guy doesn't like to spend money."

Mr. Rurik's dead empty eyes came to Shepard in a flash and she covered her eyes with the heel of her hands. As Ricky punched Ty, Shepard said without removing her hands, "Who got the candy bar at the grocers?"

Just as Tyler was about to say Ricky, he was punched again by Ricky who cut in, "Sheriff brought out bags of stuff to us. We saw her in the alley next to the store and she had us stand guard."

"Mr. Ruri-" Shepard fought back the tears ... "Ricky, Tait and Mr. Rurik died trying to ... trying ... they were trying to protect me. I'm not worth that. I should have died instead!"

Ricky pulled her close as Ty looked down at the ground, "Don't say that, Shepard. If any of us make it out of here alive ... we must be grateful. Those that die here are because of those four-eyed bastards! Not you ... not me. Do you hear me?"

Shepard pulled away and looked into his eyes, "Please save yourself over me ... okay? I can't take someone else dying because of me."

"No problem there! All I am going to do for you is ..." Ricky waved the bar closer to her nose.

Shepard shook her head no, _how can I eat with all the death and destruction around me_. "I'm not hungry." She said as all three heard her stomach growl again.

"Eat before your stomach gives us away," Ricky whispered, half-joking.

She took the candy bar and as she bit a piece off on the right side of her mouth where she had more teeth now, she tasted the dried blood. Ricky saw her make a face and grabbed the bottle of Jack Daniels that he had slid in his jacket on the way out. "Here, rinse your mouth with this." Shepard thanked him and as she took a swish she gagged and spit it out with batarian and human blood mixed in. Just as the liquid hit the gravel another explosion went off.

"I hope those marines can hold out," Tyler said pulling his jacket closed again in a nervous way.

Ricky looked at Shepard, "Ty and I have to get back onto position. But take these aspirins and a swig of Jack."

Shepard shook her head no but Ricky would not take no as an answer, not this time. So Ricky personally put the aspirins in her mouth and made her take a quick swig. It made her cough and Ricky put his hand over her mouth as B glared at him. "Leave her alone with your alcohol. I don't want to see it drunk by her, you or Tyler again. Understand."

The boys nodded and Shepard hugged Ricky again. "Ricky, I just wanna go home."

Ricky kissed her on the forehead, "Is that all you want? I can make that happen. I mean, we can't leave Pepe Le Pew alone in your room too long. He might start reading your diary."

Shepard hung on Ricky's jacket as she kept her head against his chest, "Promise."

"Trust me." He softly pulled away from her. "You and me … we will survive this and dance the watusi together … naked!" Then he motioned to Tyler and the two boys headed for a deputy two roof tops over. Ricky waved one last time, grinning as he went behind a wall and Shepard turned to see B taking a drink of water, her back against the low wall.

Shepard crouched, went over to B who handed her the water as she looked out at the park and quickly regretted it. People were lined up and the batarians were now implanting something in the adults that caused them, like the children, to scream out in pain. The sound of the screams was mixed with the batarians' laughter. "Have you seen dad?" Shepard could barely get out as she watched.

Birgit looked at Shepard as she slid her Helix sniper rifle a little to the right, "Don't know but right now, Eli, you need to focus. Here take my Helix … you know how to shoot it better than I."

"I don't know if I could ..." Shepard looked down at it.

"You can," B said in a firm voice. "We need to be ready ... we are going to take back this town."

"Okay," Shepard grabbed it and started using the scope to get a closer look at all the events around her. She turned to the south side of the town and could see the marines pinned and whispered, "Do you think that more help is on the way?"

"I fuckin' hope so. I'm not doing this for the tickle between my legs." She quickly regretted her comment as she looked at Shepard.

Shepard looked over at Rurik's Grocers and felt her stomach knot, "I have to find dad, B. Nothing matters but finding dad."

"I know. I've been keeping an eye out for him for the last two days and nothing."

"Two days?" Shepard looked over at the Sheriff.

B looked past Shepard, "Butterfly, you have been up here for over 48 hours ... passed out."

After they had gotten Shepard up on the roof, B had given her a shot of a sedative to not only help with her pain but to also stop her ramblings. She had been calling out for her mother and at times screamed out in pain. B knew that if she didn't give her the sedative it could risk all their lives. She had worried that she had given her too much when Shepard continued to sleep, but there was nothing she could do. That first night the citizens that were hiding out on the rooftop were moved into the hills after the sun went down. After they were safely hidden, B had placed her deputies on different rooftops. She had wanted Ricky and Tyler to go into the hills as well but they would not leave Shepard. "Wherever Shepard is ... that is where we are." Ricky had said. So B gave them rifles from the stockpile and put them in positions. If … no ... when the marines broke through she wanted them to be ready to assist.

She had really wanted to take a drink of Brännvin but she couldn't afford to not have all her wits. So instead of taking a drink she told Shepard how they had watched the marines try and rescue them but the batarians had trapped them right at the start. Shepard touched her swollen eye again as she felt her heart race … no sign of her dad in two days. She pulled closer to B, "I sent him to give momma her Bible. Because of me Tait and Mr. Rurik died. And maybe even dad."

B looked at Shepard and pulled her chin up, "You are not responsible for anyone's death. These batarians … these bastards are the responsible party. Do you hear me?"

Shepard dropped her head, tears running down her cheek, "But I'm the reason that Tait did not go away on vacation. Momma always said to not be selfish … because of my selfishness he was here."

B dropped her head at the mention of Hannah. Arriving at the house and seeing her best friend holding the pastor in his arms crying she had felt her own heart stop beating. The one person that she had ever loved in a romantic way was gone and as she looked now at Eli she saw so much of her mother there. _Pastor, I will do everything to take care of Eli. I promise_. "Eli, this is not your fuckin' fault. None of it." _Shit, you had to say fuck. Why can't you talk without fuckin' swearing? Fuck. _Shepard turned her attention to a new group of people being herded down the street and her breath caught. Her dad was in this group and he looked scared with his shirt torn and nose bloodied. Shepard began to cry out when B put her hand over her mouth. "No Eli. We have to be smart."

Pierce was looking around for his daughter, wanting to call out her name, thinking if she was anywhere close she would hear him. But he didn't want to draw attention to her if she heard him and responded so he just looked at every body. The strike had happened just as he had left Hannah and was on his way to the pub. He had pulled his jeep to the side of the road, in shock and then turned it around to head home. He had to get to Eli and keep her safe. He had found the house empty and just as he was about to get back in his jeep he saw a group of batarians coming down the street_. Shit! Think Pierce, you have to find Eli_. He had jumped out of his jeep and headed into his backyard on foot and realized that the only way out was in the … _aw, no! I can't!_

As if Hannah's God had a sick sense of humor, a shuima could be seen rising out of the water and then disappear below the surface. _I can't! Those things … teeth_. But he saw Eli in his mind and so Pierce held his breath and forced his legs into the water. Every so often, as he hid under the dock, he imagined them biting him and he would flinch. He had stayed under there all night and then began swimming down the river towards town at daybreak. He had to find Eli. He had stayed in the river and as he passed batarians he almost gave himself away as the horsefish appeared around him. _Nice horsey, er, fishy thing. Be nice please_. By day two he was so hungry and, trying to be brave, he had left the river sneaking into a Qwik Go store after dark. Once inside he saw the Snickers and put one in his pocket, _Just in case I find Eli. _When he pulled a bag of chips from the rack, he heard a noise that made him turn to look … a batarian rifle butted him in the face.

As he passed Rurik's Grocers he saw Tait on the ground. He knew it was the boy by the blond hair and the Savannah Sand Gnats jacket that Eli had given him for his birthday. His heart began to race as he looked all around the boy; _Please Hannah's God … please let Eli be safe_. Pierce in his panic had strayed from the group as he began to look for his kid. As the batarian began to scream at him to get back in line, Pierce ignored him as he continued to search. _Please God, let me find her. Please! Hannah help me find Eli … I've gotta keep her safe_. As he moved towards the Grocers in his search one of the batarians seemed to be yelling something which brought two batarians running over with flamethrowers. Pierce so lost in his panic over finding Shepard didn't realize that gas was being thrown on him until too late. As he turned to face the batarians responsible for the drenching all he saw was a stream of fire and then white hot pain. He would have screamed but that would have taken oxygen and as his body began to dance then run he silently begged for mercy ... begged that someone take away the pain. And even as his body screamed in pain and his mind begged for mercy … his heart told him that he had failed. Failed to find his daughter. Failed in protecting her. Failed his Hannah.

Shepard had watched the whole thing, struggling not to move, knowing that if she did she would risk the other lives on the roof with her. But she couldn't just watch her father get hurt as the two batarians came forward ... Not her pops. She had grabbed the Helix wanting to stop the batarians, any batarian, from coming near her daddy, but B pushed it away from their direction, "No Eli. It will give our location away." And then as they splashed gas on him and set him on fire B froze as she saw her best friend burn. Shepard saw her father on fire, saw him begin to dance … to run ... to suffer ... and in that moment she heard him say, "If I was in that much pain and there was nothing anyone could do to save me … I would pray that my pain, my suffering would end quickly."

Shepard pulled the Helix up and in his direction; she then brought the scope down on him, thanked God for leaving her one good eye and with a squeeze Pierce's pain ended. Shepard, through the scope watched her father hit the ground ... watched as he died. And then she then looked at B … She was empty, nothing left to live for and so she told her Aunt B, "Get Ricky and Ty out of here ... Don't worry about me. I just want to be with mom and dad. I love you!" B had reached out ... reached out out to stop her but Shepard despite her injuries was quick. Shepard had run to divert the batarians, to give the others a chance to get out after she had given away her position to them. As she jumped along the roofs B began firing to try and give her cover, _Motherfuck … no one is gonna hurt Hannah's daughter_! The deputies began to herd Ricky and Tyler in the opposite direction as B killed the ones responsible, truly responsible, for her best friend's death. "Fuck you … you sons-of-bitches!"

Shepard had reached a dead end and with only one way out … down. So she stood with her legs slightly apart and raised the rifle. She started shooting at the batarians as if they were bottles … or clay pigeons. As she began dropping the enemies, she felt the first enemy bullet make contact with her left arm and then two bullets hit simultaneously. One hit her hip while the other slammed at her heart. The bullet ricocheted off the prothean jewelry and grazed her chin. The multiple impacts threw her off balance and she toppled from the roof. She was falling with no one to catch her.


	28. Blue Gardenias

Liara tried to catch it ... she tried as it fell but the piece of jewelry was now laying 16 feet down the shaft where it had landed after the clasp had come undone. "Oh, Goddess!" She groaned as she lay on her belly, flashlight in hand and shining on the silver cross below. This whole experience had not been going well, outside the revelation of the secondary code. Just earlier that morning Zazzy had started another fight and thank the Goddess it was with an asari … Vesta. Vesta using her asari diplomacy had settled the dispute quickly after seeing that Zazzy would not budge in his opinion.

She looked over at him and smiled. Sometimes he could drive her crazy but then he would say something brilliant and she would remember why she enjoyed his friendship. He was talking to himself again, something about how long it would take to crack the code and she smiled as he went back to the wall and put his face against it ... tapping against it. Liara went to one of the bags and found a 22 foot rope ... she then went over to the shaft, tied one end to her work table and dropped the other end down the shaft. As she began climbing down she remembered her first solo attempt at a Prothean dig.

* * *

It was 2154 and Liara was only 77 years old then ... she had properly budgeted for her trip of a week with time off from the Kilia Library of Science and Medicine. She had studied up on the history of the planet Kharditsa, studied the artifacts and architectural structures already unearthed and even researched what tools would be needed. She was ready and excited. Her mother had suggested getting her a guide, but Liara was determined that she could do this on her own. Sibila had said that she would be sorry if she didn't listen to the Matriarch … But no, Liara had to do it her way. After all, how hard could it really be? She knew what she was doing, mostly. So off she went for her week long solo adventure.

Upon arrival, she realized that she had not brought her sleeping bag and by day two she realized that she also did not have the proper attire or provisions. Yes, the books had given instruction for what she needed on Kharditsa, but that was for the dry season and here she was during the heavy rain fall season. Her first day there, she was caught in a rainstorm wearing a light one piece uniform that was not intended for moisture. It was now 3 sizes smaller, the sleeves just below her elbows, the legs just below her knee caps and the middle pure obscenity. She had only two outfits left waiting their turn to be shrunk, food that had quickly grown mold and now - no pickaxe. It had fallen down a shaft.

After looking down the shaft and realizing that there was no way she could get her tool out of the bottomless hole ... Liara propped her chin up on her one hand as she lay next to the thieving and gaping hole, while with the other hand she was bouncing the flashlight's beam around the cavern. She wasn't really paying attention until the beam came upon an object stuck in the wall to her right. She got up and moved closer. There was writing of some kind over it and she took a picture before she removed the piece. Liara turned it over and over in her hand fascinated by the colors of the jewels in it. It appeared to be a piece of jewelry that was worn in a head dress of some kind. As she spit on it and began to clean it a batarian appeared in the cave. It was making a noise but she couldn't understand it. Before she knew it, there were three of these creatures now in the cavern making hideous noises causing her to quickly back up. An asari appeared from behind them and stepped between her and the hideous creatures.

"It's okay," the asari said to her, "we aren't here to hurt you. These batarians wanted to see the Kharditsa walls of knowledge and the Ditsa Caverns."

"Batarians are interested in the protheans?" Liara asked as she picked up her bag and dropped the prothean piece in it.

"They say they are ... But who really knows." the asari whispered as she extended her hand and introduced herself, "I'm Ginerva T'Serza, guide to the Kharditsa ruins. And you are?"

"Dr. Liara T'Soni," Liara answered, looking at her extended hand. "Are you staying at the Hupnos Camp?"

"Yes," Ginerva answered as she dropped her hand, "Sorry, I am so used to dealing with batarians and humans that I forget our customs."

Liara smiled, "That is okay. It just seems quite forward that custom ... so quick to touch without true thought."

"That's how I use to feel but you get used to it ... We are on our way to the P22E Columns …" As Ginerva spoke she couldn't help but notice the ill-shaped uniform that Liara was wearing, "Is that outfit the new look on Thessia? I haven't been home in centuries."

Liara couldn't help but laugh, "I'm afraid that this is the style of one who doesn't know the environment's dress code."

Ginerva smiled and before she could respond, the batarians said something that seemed to change Ginerva's mood. "I have to go, but maybe later we can talk in camp? Oh, there is a shop that sells attire if you need something less … uh, snug?"

"Do they also carry pickaxes?" Liara asked as she flashed her light into the shaft.

Ginerva followed the light, smiled and gave Liara a nod, "Just 120 credits will get you a new one."

"A hundred and twenty credits?" Liara's eyes got big. "That is pure robbery. They should cost half that at most."

"Robbery, yes." Ginerva agreed. "But where else can you buy one? Another planet, I'm afraid."

Liara sighed as her frugal nature cringed at spending double the worth of an item, "Robbery."

Later that evening as Liara had her dinner at a food shack in the campsite; Ginerva arrived with the three batarians and left them to sit with Liara, "I see that you changed."

"Yes," Liara responded as she held up her arms to show off the normal length sleeves, "although, the short sleeves were growing on me."

The smaller batarian said something to Ginerva, who just shook her head. "What did it say?" Liara asked.

"Don't you have their languages uploaded?" Ginerva asked. As Liara shook her head, Ginerva reached into her bag. Liara watched as she rustled through her items and finally pulled out a small black device. "Upload this; it has not only the 2 standard batarian languages but all 4 main languages that the humans speak. Although, I would suggest not letting either of the filthy creatures know that you understand them."

Liara uploaded the B2ML and H4ML and just as they completed she heard the same batarian say "Ginerva, just ask her if she wants to come to my tent. I know how you asari are open to friendly conversation and she is quite appealing."

Ginerva shook her head, "She doesn't understand your language and she is not here as a consort."

Liara couldn't believe that this thing would even think that she would even consider being with it. "Are they always this …"

"Disgusting?" Ginerva interrupted, "Very. Humans are just as bad … well, actually they can be worse. I just finished showing a group of humans the Evorp Cradle and they didn't have any real understanding of its beauty … Of its delicate curves." She pulled a disc from her bag marked S&M**,** "Take a look at this vid ... it will show you how they pleasure each other. A little rough if you ask me. Oh, and did you know that they only live up to one-hundred and twenty years if they are lucky? Can you imagine?"

Liara shook her head, "I thought their average life span was ninety to a hundred."

"A hundred and twenty. Better than salarians, I guess, but why even be born!" Ginerva began to laugh, which drew the batarians attention.

Liara didn't like these creatures looking at her and moved just enough that she did not see them, "Why would humans want to see the Evorp Cradle?"

"Humans, like batarians, think that they will be able to understand things just by showing up," Ginerva answered, becoming more serious. "But if they can't understand it … well, then they pretend to, call it art and buy it."

Liara shifted on her seat at this last comment, "You said buy it?"

"There are humans who are buying up artifacts and historical pieces of all cultures … If they can't understand it, well then … just own it." Ginerva answered. "With their short life span, ignorance and limited abilities it just makes their arrogance even less tolerable. But then I may only be meeting the wrong kind ... who knows."

"How do you work with them?" Liara asked.

"Hmm, after 520 years nothing really disturbs me," Ginerva answered. "But, my advice to you is that if you ever find yourself in a group of humans or these beasts ... reveal nothing. Trust no one and don't ever depend on one, they don't even take care of each other."

"Well, hopefully I will never find myself depending on them." Liara said as she placed the S&M disc in her case. "It was nice meeting you Ginerva."

Liara went to her tent, pulled out the disc, turned it in her hand thinking about Moon Unit Zappa and crawled halfway out of her tent, tossed the disc in the camp fire and retreated back in. Hopefully, she would not have to ever deal with those creatures. The less she knew about them, the better.

* * *

_And yet here you are ... climbing down a shaft just to get a gift from a human_, Liara thought just as she was about to get to the bottom. The bottom came faster than expected though as the ground shook above her and she fell the last 6 feet. She saw a dust cloud cut out the light and thought she heard yelling, a popping noise. She even thought that she heard Vesta scream. She looked down, turned her flashlight on, saw what she had come for, grabbed the bracelet and waited for the dust to settle.

As Liara was almost at the bottom, four krogan had come in with three humans bound and one of the krogan tossed a small blast cap bomb that created a small hole and kicked up dust. "Stupid! Now we can't see!" The leader, a krogan battlemaster, could be heard growling in disgust.

Zazzy, coughing, began telling them that they needed to leave. "No. No. Off-limits. Must leave."

The leader looked at Zazzy and said, "We are here for a Dr. Liara T'Soni." as an image of her appeared from his omni-tool.

"Dr. T'Soni? No. She does not have time. Much work to do." Zazzy was upset and trying to wave away the dust in the air ... and just wanting these strangers to go.

The leader raised a pistol and killed Tila who had been scanning the wall. "Dr. T'Soni."

"This will not do. Killing unnecessary." Zazzy said as he moved towards his smaller kit.

The leader aimed at Vesta, "Tell me."

"We don't know where the Doctor is," Vesta said right before Zazzy tossed a small grenade at them and Vesta screamed.

The leader went after Zazzy as Vesta tried to escape through the tunnels. One of the humans escaped from the krogans at the same time and followed her when one of the other krogans sent three grenades down after them. The blasts brought the walls down on the fleeing asari and human as well as the roof over the wall of Kyuos. Zazzy seeing the wall disappear behind rubble as he ran around the table cried, "Disaster. Message lost. Liara will be upset."

The leader caught the salarian by the neck and snapped it, killing him instantly. "The Doctor has to be around here ... Look!" The leader then began hunting through the kits of the team until he found what he was looking for - a gun. He took Zazzy's firearm and went over to the two remaining humans and killed them. After the three searched the area with no Doctor T'Soni located, the leader was disgusted. "The asari must be back at the camp. Let's go find her. Saren will not be pleased if we come back empty handed."

Liara had grown tired of waiting and started climbing back up not realizing that she was climbing towards a massacre. As she finally made it to the top and pulled herself out she saw the wall gone with tons of debris in front of it. She felt tears forming in her eyes, "No! Zazzy what have you done?" As she walked over to it she saw Zazzy's legs and quickly realized that he was dead. She then began to look around and saw the two humans as well. Liara crouched low, not sure if there were any other intruders near. She did not see Tila or Vesta anywhere and hoped that they had escaped. She knew that she should hide but she went to the body of her friend instead.

She looked at his face, put his hand against her cheek and whispered, "Please, Zazzy ... wake up. Don't leave me. We have so many things to do together ... we still have the discs on Illium ... the box seats on Serrice. Remember? You can't leave ... please wake up."

It was while she was holding her friend's hand, tears running down her face as she begged her friend to not die ... to not leave her that she heard movement at the entrance. She covered his body with hers, trying to protect him when she heard Shiala, "Little? Are you in here?"

* * *

"Liara?" The Matriarch stood, her stomach all in knots and walked closer to the screen, "Is she ... hurt?"

"No, Matriarch," Shiala answered. "She had dropped her bracelet down a shaft and missed all of it." Benezia had almost smiled as she thought, _she will always survive_.

"Let me speak to her," Benezia wanted to see her daughter.

Shiala looked nervous, "Matriach ... she, uh ... she ..."

"What is wrong?" The Matriarch felt panic creeping in, "Where is Liara?"

"She's been crying over the death of her friend, Dr. Kish," Shiala answered, "Crying ... non-stop."

"Crying? Friend?" The Matriarch asked, agitated. "She is only ninety-three years old ... She cannot have connected with an outsider ... Not yet. Put her on Shiala!"

"She ... she won't stop crying. She called him friend and wouldn't let him go." Shiala almost apologized for going against the Matriarch's words, "She was crying and begging him to wake up ... she is even now inconsolable."

"Of course," The Matriarch sighed and thought; _can't anything be easy with her, Little? _"You say that there were two dead humans?"

"Yes, Matriarch." Shiala answered. "Shot in the back with Dr. Kish's gun. Their hands were still bound. The gun, however, was not with Dr. Kish but next to the humans. Looking at the ground, it would appear that there were others present as well."

"Krogans." Benezia said. _Only krogans would be stupid enough to try and set up another species so poorly_. "Find out who these humans are and where they went missing."

"Missing?" Shiala asked.

"I would guess that they were not there willingly by the restraints." Benezia answered, "Do not leave Liara alone though. I would gather that the krogans are still close by looking for her."

"Do you want us to locate them and take care of this?" Shiala hoped she said yes because she had already put it in motion. Seeing Little so crushed she was determined to see the individuals responsible dead.

"Quickly … and do not tell Liara." Benezia cut the communication and went to Liara's room. She sat on the bed, placing her hand on a pillow, not moving for an hour. _Saren, you should never send krogans to do any kind of work that requires brains or a delicate hand. I must find out what you are up to. I must to protect my daughter_.

An hour later ... Kyriake, her private companion, knocked on the door and entered as Benezia stood. "Shiala sends word that the problem has been taken care of … with one exception."

"Yes?" Benezia asked trying to keep calm.

"One krogan, a battlemaster, escaped. But three krogans will not be a bother in the future." She told her as Benezia took a deep breath.

Kyri watched Benezia walk out on to her daughter's terrace and take another deep breath to capture the bouquet of the gardenias that had been delivered from Illium just two days prior and placed throughout the estate. Like most things not from Thessia they would not last long ... but she and Liara had fallen in love with the earth flower after discovering them outside a human market in Nos Astra. Her mind went back to when they had spent six months there together ... the shopping, planning, smiles and just seeing her daughter smile. She did not know what she would do if anything ever happened to her daughter ... but she did know one thing. She would not survive if her daughter was taken from her. She had seen asari after the loss of a daughter and they were empty ... dead already before they met the grave.

Benezia sat down on the chair overlooking Armali and pulled up a flower ... The white petals of the gardenias were already turning a slight blue and by morning would be dead. But for now, Benezia sat smelling the gardenias and planning.


	29. Kerberos La Cha Cha

Shepard could smell the Gardenia House Coffee brewing as she got out of bed and crept quietly to the bathroom wearing nothing but her birthday suit. Her roommate, Ted, had been keeping an ear towards her bedroom and caught the slight creak on a floorboard sending him out of the kitchen, "Can I have what you brought home?"

Shepard halfway in the bathroom looked back at him with a smile, "No."

Ted peeked in her bedroom, spied the naked male lying on top of the covers asleep, shook his head and then followed her in. "Why must you always be so stingy? All I want is a taste."

Shepard laughed as she stepped into the shower and began singing 'Tu Solo Tu' in an exaggerated crying manner. The steam quickly filled the bathroom and Ted reached into the shower and turned the hot water down, "Girl, you are going to scald yourself with the shower being that hot."

Shepard slapped his hand playfully and popped her head out, "Teddy! How many times do I have to tell you not to put your hand in the shower unless you plan on using it?"

Ted put one hand on his hip, pursed his lips, stood back and began wagging a finger, "You cannot handle this bag of mess! Don't you ever forget it! Now keep that shower away from the scald level."

"I like my showers hot." Shepard responded as she put her head back in.

"But look at your skin! You come out of the shower red like a tomato every time!" He answered.

Shepard shook her head as he left and turned the hot water back up, "I like tomatoes."

Shepard had been living with Ted Silverstein for the past year and in fact had been living in San Antonio, Texas for just over a year.

* * *

After Mindoir had been released by the batarians, Lieutenant Ernesto Zabaleta had been the first to her and demanded immediate medical treatment. He had seen her "daring act of bravery" fighting the enemy on the roof but was completely unaware that it had started with the mercy killing of her own father. As the Alliance questioned her about that "act of bravery" her father came to mind. The rape in the grocers came to mind. Too many things came to mind. Shepard did not want to think of the shooting, of the events … or of her Aunt B who had been found dead not far from her.

The Sheriff had followed after her and when she saw Shepard fall off the roof she quickly found a way down to her. As she landed on the ground she felt pain in her side and realized that she had been shot. She tried to keep moving towards Shepard, _fuck it B … you gotta protect Hannah's_ … Another bullet tore into her neck. _Oh, God … Butterfly_. As her legs gave out she tried to keep moving … _just a few more feet. Keep movi_ … B's body gave out and her eyes fell on Shepard just two feet away. _Pierce, I failed_... was her last thought as she exhaled.

Shepard did not want to think of Tait or of her two friends, Ricky and Tyler. Tyler had been found curled up dead next to a deputy while Ricky went MIA. He had also raced towards his friend when she fell and as he slid down the backside of the building, he had slid right into the arms of the enemies. What happened to Ricky Parks no one knew so she was told by her grandparents that he had died as well just to help give her "closure" … God how she would learn to hate that stupid and very empty word. There was more, so much more horror, more loss that it tore at her as dark thoughts filled her head. While everyone had wanted her to talk about the events, some just for the entertainment of it, to tell them what she knew, she had built a wall to protect her, to guard her soul and she gave nothing away, using amnesia as her way out. Yes, the Alliance had taken care of her medically but they also had held a debriefing headed by one of their psychiatrists who she felt was trying to probe her mind, to get his rocks off. That was probably an unfair assessment on her part and she knew it, but it was how she felt. She was angry and here he had kept trying to push her, to make her remember and she just wanted him to shut up. To just leave her alone. She hated the questions, the looks and she told anyone who asked that she couldn't remember. One too many questions later, one too many pushes emotionally by the psychiatrist and she had thrown a chair, breaking his nose in the process and slammed her own head against the two-way mirror. That was the end of her debriefing.

Once released into the care of her grandparents it only got worse for her. She could see the pain in their faces. She could see how they were trying so hard to take care of her. To say the right things to her. Everyone it seemed in their community knew about the awful event and Shepard could feel the stares, hear the whispering and hated it. She saw everyone's concern and so she spent the next two years giving the appearance of being _okay_. She stayed on the honor roll, participated in sports where she even captained the female rugby team and dated the football quarterback, Terry Wishart. To all outsiders Shepard appeared to be recovering quickly, taking her mother's lesson of "focus outside of you, Elizabeth. Think of others first." Shepard thought of how she had put her desire, her wants first, asking Tait to not go on vacation and in the end it was her selfishness that killed him … _It was your fault. You were selfish. Momma was right ... Always put others first. I'll try to not hurt others again. I'll be strong._ So Shepard buried her pain, buried all the shadow people … what she called everyone that she lost on Mindoir. So instead of grieving, crying and reaching out to her family in Georgia for help … Elizabeth Whisper crawled deep inside herself while Shepard aced tests, played sports, made out at the local lookout point, got drunk with her cousins and built models with her grandfather.

As she got closer to graduation her grandparents began talking about what Universities she would apply to. She could have attended any University based on her grades and with the life insurance left by her mother, father, Aunt B and even her Uncle Stu the funds were also there. Birgit had also left her home to her Butterfly and Grandpa Jack had contacted a rental agency to handle leasing both places out. He then had the Shepard's and Birgit's personal items placed in a storage unit on Mindoir and told his wife that when Shepard was ready she could decide on both the real estate and the storage … but only when she was ready.

What no one knew was that Shepard just wanted to get away. To go where no one knew her, where no one knew about her past and where she could just be normal. So the day after graduation, she sat down and wrote her grandparents a letter, trying to explain her need to get away, to start over, and to forget. Then she put some clothes in a backpack and before her grandparents woke up she was on the road. She had taken nothing of her past, no photos, no mementos. She rode her BMW motorcycle all the way to San Antonio where she found herself stopping right in front of the Alamo.

It had been 3 days since she had left her grandparents and she found herself looking at the mission all lit up in the night. She felt a connection with that place but didn't know why. She had never heard of the place in her high school history lessons, it wasn't taught, but the building called out to her. _This place will work. At least to start_. Shepard had thought and within a week she was bussing tables at a café and staying at a weekly motel. While working at the café, Shepard met Ted who worked at the beauty salon next door to her job and he quickly took her under his wing. Through a contact, and Teddy had many in San Antonio, Shepard had started working in a warehouse that required her to drive a forklift and haul crates all day long. More times than not, Shepard pulled overtime and she didn't care, staying busy kept her mind off things that hurt. Work and sports was her ways of escaping the shadow people. Shepard stayed away from playing music though because touching a guitar she felt her father and playing the piano she felt her mother. She had not sat down with a musical instrument since her mother's funeral.

* * *

Ted was painting his nails when Shepard, wearing a towel, came into the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee. "Show tonight?" She asked as she sat down.

"Of course, it's Friday," he answered as he tapped her arm with a nail file, "Tomatoes!"

"Bossy!" Shepard responded as she tapped his arm with her finger.

"Do you want to come and see my absolutely amazing performance tonight?" Ted performed drag at the local gay bar, Rumourz, as Margarita La Cha Cha and was constantly trying to get Shepard to come back to the club.

Shepard smiled then took a sip of her coffee. The one and only time that she had come with Ted, she had felt uncomfortable. There had been a woman there that had reminded her so much of her Aunt B that she preferred to not go again. "I thought I would stay in tonight and do a little reading."

"What about your beautiful man?" Shepard had met Manny when she had taken her bike in to his garage to get it fixed just four months after landing at the Alamo's doorstep. He was ten years her senior with dark wavy hair, skin the color of caramel and a boxer's body. Shepard found him attractive at the start and his 'attractiveness' went up times ten when he quickly fixed her bike. Once she stopped looking at his biceps she saw his name on his shirt and quickly felt uncomfortable. Jesus._ That will not do_. So she asked him as they talked what his middle name was. Emmanuel. _Yep the other paddle fell in too_, she thought. "Has anyone ever called you Manny?" Shepard asked. And Manny he was christened. It had been just over ten months since they had been together and he had just proposed to her not three nights before.

"I'm hoping for a night alone."

"You know I am beginning to think that you do not like my kind," Ted said as he continued working on his nail.

"Teddy, you know that's not true!" Shepard responded as Teddy put down the nail polish, raised a brow and looked at her.

"Really?" he said accusingly. "Then why won't you come see me?"

"I just … well … I … Fine. What time?"

"It starts at 10:00 drag time." He answered as he went back to working on his nails.

Shepard looked at Ted as she began to towel dry her hair, "What does that mean?"

"11:30 tonight." Ted smiled.

"You know that this is emotional blackmail, right?" Shepard pouted as she stood up.

Ted looked up, "Honey, I like to call it guilt from this amazing Jewish mother. Next week we work on sharing your boys … I mean toys."

Shepard laughed as she headed back into her bedroom.

Manny had been awake since Shepard had crawled out of bed and headed to a shower. He would have gladly joined her but couldn't take how hot she liked it. He had begged her to turn the hot water down once when he had tried a little shower play but she had shook her head, handed him the soap and directed him to wash her back. Never again he thought after losing two layers of skin that day. Okay, maybe that was an exaggeration, but it felt like that ... and he had never had red skin before that day. He was lying on his stomach as she came in and she gently slid on top of him, pressing her body against him. She smelled like soap and as she began kissing his shoulder he felt himself start to stir. He carefully turned over, keeping her on top of him and once he was on his back he felt her hand start to coax him.

As she was kissing playfully on his lips, her hand stroking him, it was leaving him feeling powerless against her. Manny knew that he wasn't brilliant, reflective or deep, hell he could rebuild an engine but give him a book or a crossword puzzle; they might as well have been in Greek. He was not a word man and rarely read anything but the Hot Rod mags but she didn't care. She also didn't care that he wasn't good at pillow talk; she loved what his hands could do on both an engine and on her. What he lacked verbally he all but made up for in his body. He did not require Shepard to talk about where she came from, who her people were or what her life had been like before he met her. He just lived day to day without stopping to reflect on the past. It never crossed his mind to ask where she came from. All he knew or cared was that she was with him now. It was his "live in the present" personality that she liked most about him and was the real reason that their relationship worked.

At this moment Manny wanted to be inside her but she rolled off and jumped out of bed, "I've got to finish getting ready." Manny covered himself with his hand and Shepard smiled. As she slid on a pair of jeans she looked over at him sitting on the edge of the bed looking up at her. "In pain?" Shepard asked. Manny nodded his head as she walked over in jeans and a bra, got down in front of him on her knees and removed his hand. "I know what you need." She whispered as she kissed him on his lips and pushed his legs farther apart. Manny closed his eyes as he felt Shepard's hand wrap around him, "Are you sure you want me to do this?" Manny without opening his eyes, feeling her hand stroking him, nodded again. "Okay then … Teddy! Manny needs some help!" Shepard yelled, then giggled and quickly got up as Manny opened his eyes.

"Help?" Teddy could be heard as he ran from the kitchen and popped his head into the bedroom.

"No." Manny answered as he covered himself and grabbed his boxers off the floor, giving Teddy an ass shot. "No help needed."

Shepard was laughing as Ted fanned himself after seeing Manny's ass. She put on her black work shirt with the white and orange logo K and said to her heated roommate, "Sorry Teddy, guess I was wrong ... I think that Manny can do it alone."

"Do it alone?" Teddy looked at her with pursed lips. "You are a wicked girl Shepard!" He then looked at Manny who had his face in his hands. "Manny you need to date a nice girl."

"I am just trying to share," Shepard smiled innocently as Teddy shook his head and left the two alone. Manny was glaring at her as he put on his pants. "I'm sorry, Manny. But you must admit that it was funny."

Manny sat back down on the edge of the bed and she walked over to him. "You not only drive me crazy but you shouldn't tease me like this. It could cause some kind of damage to my ..." He pulled her closer to him by her hips as he left himself exposed.

Shepard slapped his hands as he tried to undo her pants, "No, Manny. I have work."

"Tonight?" He asked as she pulled away.

"No." Shepard walked over to her dresser and picked up her brush, "I promised Teddy that I would go to his club tonight. Do you want to go with me?"

"No." Manny quickly answered.

Shepard brushed her hair and looked back at him in the mirror. He was still holding himself and looking at her, "Why don't you ease your tension? I can do this and watch at the same time. You know I like to watch."

Manny looked at her reflection, "Do you love me, Shepard?"

Shepard grew serious as she looked at him in the mirror. Manny had told her he loved her when he had proposed and it had scared her. She didn't know how she felt about him. Cared? Yes. Desired? Yes. Needed? Yes. Loved? She turned around and looked into his eyes where she saw the pleading. _Love me Shepard. Please._ She stepped towards him and once between his legs, ran her hands through his dark wavy hair. She semi-rough pulled his head back to look at her, "Manny … I ... I don't know what I feel. I know that I care about you. That being with you feels … feels" _safe_ "good."

"Marry me." Manny said as he put his forehead against her stomach. Shepard bent over and kissed the top of his head. Silence filled the room as they stayed in that spot for a few minutes then Shepard pulled away, kissed him on the lips and left for work.

* * *

Shepard was parking her forklift as the 5 o'clock bell went off in the Kerberos warehouse. She was about to head to her locker when her boss waved her and three other co-workers over. "Shepard! Mondale! Sanchez! Moreno!" Carlton shouted from his office that overlooked the main floor. The four employees looked at each other and then headed up to his office. As they stepped in he was reading a datapad, "I need you four to come in tomorrow. Full day plus 5."

"Shit Boss!" Sanchez complained, "Fourteen hour shift tomorrow? I had plans!"

"Sorry!" Carlton chomped down on his cigar. "But I have orders from the top that we have a very important shipment coming in. We have to get them checked in and shipped out asap."

"Where they going that this is such a big deal?" Mondale asked.

"Somewhere off-world," Carlton looked at the datapad. "Mintoir."

"Mindoir," Shepard corrected without even thinking. The word just came out and it left a bitter taste in her mouth.

"Right. Right. Mindoir" Carlton shook his head.

"Off-world living," Moreno whistled. "Those people are crazy to go out there with limited protection. I heard that three space shuttles went missing last week."

"They are fools!" Carlton opinioned. "You ask me, they get what they deserve."

Sanchez grabbed his cross hanging from his neck, "No one deserves any of that …"

"Especially what happened to Mindoir in 70' … that was just horrible." Moreno cut in.

"Are you kiddin' me?" Carlton chomped. "I heard that the government told them to evacuate but the people refused. Got everyone killed. Serves em' right."

Shepard was hearing the same lies that were reported by the media shortly after the attack, that the colonists had been forewarned by the government but refused to leave. When an independent political party, Terra Firma, provided proof that the colonists were completely unaware and that the government may have known pre-attack, they were ridiculed by the main political powers and media. The proof regarding the colonists however was acknowledged as correct by the Alliance but still the media chose to not give it the same attention they had the lie. It didn't "sell papers" or "fit their narrative." So here it was three years later and the average Joe on earth would tell you how those people chose to not leave. The media said so … politicians said so … it had to be true. Shepard focused on the grey ash that was growing on her boss' cigar, tuning out the words, the lies, the accusations being thrown about.

"But there were thousands of children." Mondale said as he began to get angry. "You cannot believe that those children deserved what happened to them. Children!"

Carlton dropped the datapad as ash from his cigar finally fell, "Well no, the kids should have been taken away from those dumbfucks! Every last one of them should have just been shot in the head if you ask me."

"How can you say that?" Mondale asked as his face got redder.

"Because it's true!" Carlton responded as he sat back in his chair. "Anyone leaving Earth is a complete moron that deserves what they get. It's a shame that our tax money goes to protect them. If they go out there ... it should be at their own risk!"

Mondale looked at Shepard who was looking at the ash on the floor. "Shepard, can you believe this?"

Shepard looked at Mondale, "They got what they deserved."

Mondale's mouth dropped as Shepard turned around and walked out numb. It had been over a year since she had thought of Mindoir. She could feel the people, her friends, her parents coming awfully close to her and so she had pushed them back. _They got what they deserved._ She didn't mean it. But those words pushed them back. Made them run from her. There were times that she wanted to call her grandparents and tell them she was okay. But the shadow people they were waiting to rush in. To cause her pain. To ask her why she lived while they died or worse. Why did she survive? What made her so special? So worthy? While others died, were tortured, were enslaved? The shadow people were too close.

As she got on her bike Mondale came running out at her, "Shepard! Please tell me that you didn't mean that."

Shepard holding her helmet looked over at him, "Didn't mean what?"

"That those people deserved what they got."

"Why do you care about those people?" Shepard asked as she put her helmet on and raised her visor. "Those people are long gone, so who really cares?"

"Shepard, I care." Mondale said with tears in his eyes. "I may not have known them, but dear God. What they must have went through. And to think that some are still alive and being … I can't even imagine. I can't believe that you would feel like that idiot boss of ours."

Shepard looked down feeling the shadow people getting closer. "Mondale, I'm sure that no one is alive still. So let it go …" Mondale stepped away from her as she started her bike. "Speaking of go." Shepard reached over and patted his arm, brought her visor down and headed out of the parking lot. As she stopped to let oncoming traffic pass she thought, _I need a drink_.


	30. Etchings & Elibio Academy

Liara put her drink down next to her as she finished her mid-day meal at the Serrice Square Park ... The Park was located near the Serrice University and the Thessia Guildhall and she had spent many hours here throughout her life. She had just completed a training session at the Elibio Academy and was eating before going to work at the Thessia Guildhall. Elibio Academy, called Eli by the students, was the elite biotic training school for gifted asari and after Aethoyner, Benezia had enrolled Liara. The school not only focused on the biotic control of the pupil but also clean hand-to-hand combat, inner discipline, meditation, advanced forms of Anskrit and weapons from staff to knives. Firearms were not part of the training and Benezia had debated if Liara might need to attend additional courses elsewhere after she graduated ... She would make that decision when the time came.

Liara had delayed the training one year after her mother enrolled her to go on a prothean expedition in 2171 with Professor Henell leading. The University of Serrice was once again sponsoring Liara and so Benezia had approved with only one condition ... six of her commandos, along with Shiala and Alestia were to accompany her. It had been a healing time for Liara as she focused on both the site and completing her thesis titled "Prothean First Contact Protocals" ... Work had always been a way for Liara to avoid pain.

Liara was now two years into the 10-year-master course and while she may have argued that she had met all the biotic training required for her chosen occupation … well, after Aethoyner and what she had been through, she didn't argue. That experience had left Liara weak and emotionally fragile ... She did not have the strength to make decisions and so she let her mother have complete control over her life. Before Liara had even made that decision, Benezia had taken back control over her daughter already and it started when she had her acolytes bring Liara straight home to Thessia from Aethoyner.

* * *

Benezia not only took back control but at the same time she also broke a Matriarch custom by waiting on the shuttle personally that was carrying her daughter. The Matriarchs were never to wait on individuals that were not their peers or superiors so her waiting in the port on a young asari was improper ... It did not matter that the asari was her daughter. The Matriarchs were waited on. When her private companion Kyriake reminded her of that while they were alone in the privacy of Benezia's bedroom it angered her ... "Just as customs dictate that matrons never give counsel to matriarchs?"

Kyriake backed away, her head down, "Forgive me Matriarch. I was just protecting your image. People might think that you are being too permissive with your daughter. It is improper for you to be seen waiting on her. She is not acceptable …"

Benezia cut her private companion off with a wave of her hand ... she had been worried that she might fail her daughter and so she allowed the anger to replace it. Anger was easier than her fear ... she stood within inches of her companion, "Is that how you feel? That my daughter is not acceptable? I have been waiting on her since she grew in my womb and I will wait on her until I draw my final breath. If this causes you doubts about my abilities, please … leave then."

Kyriake had never seen the Matriarch like this in all the years she had been with her ... almost ninety years pass. Kyri had come to the T'Soni estate to fix an expensive timepiece after Liara had taken it semi-apart. Benezia had explained to Kyri how her daughter wanted to know how things worked ... stayed together ... were built. This had made Kyri laugh and so she had shown the young asari how a timepiece worked, even letting the young asari help her fix it. That was the start of their relationship and while it was not public knowledge that they were together, Benezia relied on her companion. Kyri was committed to the Matriarch and she knew that Benezia was worried about her daughter, but she had also sensed that the Matriarch had been more on edge as of late. She had tried to get her to confide what had been worrying her but the Matriarch had told her it was nothing. "Forgive me. I do not nor have I ever doubted you. I will go make the arrangements."

Benezia reached out and stopped her, "Kyri … I understand that others may not appreciate my letting emotions as a mother guide me at times. It may even be foolish. But a mother I am and Liara is still a child. I cannot always put her second to Matriarchal duties." Kyriake relaxed as the Matriarch stepped in closer, took her face in her hand and kissed her on the cheek, "I hope that you can understand."

Kyriake smiled and returned the kiss on her lips, "Erotas, I will always follow you no matter where it leads."

Benezia knew that Kyriake was just trying to protect her and that she was correct about it not being appropriate, her waiting in public on her daughter ... but the reports she had been receiving about Liara were causing the mother in her to ache. To want to ease the suffering of her daughter. As she sat down on the edge of her bed she wished that Liara had been born earlier so that she did not always have to think of her Matriarchal duties. As a matron she could have done so much more with her daughter publicly. Had more freedom. _No, this is one time that I will not allow my status to stop me from being her mother_, Benezia thought.

Now as the Matriarch, no … as Liara's mother waited in the port her stomach tightened. Upon arrival, Liara was carried like a child off the flight by Shiala with the grieving asari looked drained and frail. Benezia seeing this uncharacteristically rushed to her daughter and scooped her into her arms. She had planned on soothing her at their home, but she could see that the pain and confusion on her daughter was too extreme. Benezia thought quickly of alternatives and made her way to the nearby sitruuna house, Pikria. _You can never do anything easy … can you daughter_, she thought to herself as the manager whisked her party into the private T'Soni suite. Once inside, Benezia ordered everyone out except her private companion Kyriake and Shiala.

Liara had her head on Benezia's shoulder, arms draped around her neck and she was silent as tears ran down her face. Benezia found the lounge bench in the corner and sat down placing her young daughter on her lap. "Kyri, please have a set of sitruuna prepared. Liara may wake up thirsty and hungry when we are done."

Kyriake bowed and stepped away as the Matriarch motioned to Shiala, "Yes Matriarch?"

"Lower the lights and fill the room with incense … then prepare a pallet with bedding by the fireplace." Benezia instructed as she looked down at her daughter who was breathing fast. "Little Wing, it will be okay. I will guide you through this." As the lights began to dim, Benezia began to hum an asari lullaby and took Liara's right hand and placed it over her heart, "Shhh. Liara, feel me. Let my heart beat with yours." Liara hurt too much to hear her mother's direction so Benezia pulled Liara's head up, "Liara. Think only of me … Nothing else matters."

Liara looked into her mother's eyes and choked out, "Mother, why do I … why can't I stop crying? Why does it feel … empty? Painful? Cold? I don't understand."

Benezia began wiping away Liara's tears, "This is what we call loss. What we call grieving. Dr. Kish was your friend and now he is gone. He was your friend, wasn't he?"

Liara saw Zazzy in his skyball jersey, cheering at the screen as he jumped up and down on the barstool, laughing with her as their team made a point and she began to cry again. "He never got to sit in our box!"

Benezia looked confused at her daughter, "Box?" Liara's breathing was getting quicker. _Time to move you to the next phase_, Benezia thought as she began to softly blow on Liara's tear-stained face. "Liara, I think that we need to επηρεάζω."

ΕπZρεάζYω was what asari mothers did with their daughters. It started from their birth when the mother would enter the infants mind and start the process of connection absolute. The first time was always the hardest with the infant pushing away at first. When Benezia, drained from the birthing process, looked over at her daughter, who was extremely small, she had worried that she and her daughter might be too weak. If she failed at the connection absolute she would have no influence or control over her daughter and all asari that were not connected to their mothers died within the month as their bodies rejected everything, even nourishment. Benezia looked at the infant and prayed to the Goddess that Liara would accept her, that she would not fail her creation of the womb. The infant was laid on top of her and she took her baby's small hand and as she opened her mind she found her newborn daughter pulling her in. Benezia, consumed with motherly devotion as she intertwined emotionally, mentally and spiritually with her daughter, caught her breath and it sounded like cymbals to the infant. Benezia had felt her daughter's spirit giggle at the sound and Benezia began to cry, causing the infant to hear more cymbals_. You like that, don't you_, Benezia had whispered to her and intentionally began to make music for her daughter. It was the day that Benezia understood true purpose and pure devotion.

Benezia looked at Liara as Shiala lit the incense and whispered, "You have always been strong, daughter. From the first time that we shared ΕπZρεάζYω, you hated to let me go and I had to use more strength to break the connection." It was true; the infant from the start desired her mother's touch and would try and hold her longer inside her, causing Benezia to not only increase her pull to move away but also to be proud and smile at her daughter's strength and stubbornness. ΕπZρεάζYω was shared throughout the life of the mother and daughter but was crucial during an asari change of life, of which asari had many. Benezia looked at her daughter and knew that she was hurting not only because she was experiencing her first outside connection, which was hard enough for the young, but a death on top of that stripped her bare.

Benezia kissed her daughter on her lips and then went back to softly blowing on her face. Liara felt her mother's breath that smelled of cinnamon and could hear her mother's heartbeat. "Liara … open your mind; feel my breeze upon your soul." Liara could feel her mother just outside her and she reached for her, pulling her in to her heart. Benezia softly pushed back from her and allowed the music to enter her first. To prepare a place in her daughter of peace and it brought a tingling to Liara's nerves, like static. As her mother started to blend into her she began to feel a calming presence of warmth and security. In the old language she heard her mother reveal secrets of their people as her heart rate began to slow and match Benezia's. Benezia pressed upon her about the gift of caring for others, making outside connections based on trust, friendship and even romantic desire. She pressed that all creatures needed to connect with each other and that it was never to be treated lightly but with dignity, compassion and respect. Then Benezia moved softer as she spoke of the inevitable loss that asari felt. Yes, there were many gifts of a long life but all things carried a price. For the asari one of those prices was burying many non-asari loved ones. She spoke of how in death, a part of them lived on in you and that it honored them for there to be tears both of loss and joy. Liara heard her mother guide her on being grateful that Dr. Kish had been her friend and to look at all the things that he had left her. Their memories, his influence in her life and how he was now truly one with the light. _Liara, it honors both the asari and the non-asari that you acknowledge the feeling of loss … but it is an even bigger honor that you let them go. There can be no honor to their memory if you stay grieving and shut out life. You must in true asarian ways let them go._ Her mother pressed upon her the cycle of death in the asarian code; pain, reflection, gratefulness, acceptance, peace. Liara felt the instructions and teachings and the pain began to ease. Her mother's music continued as her words were silenced and Liara felt her mother move about her. She felt her mother's love and as Benezia began to pull away, Liara tried to keep her … _Stay mother. Please don't go_. She could hear her mother laugh causing more cymbals to sound and then she was gone and Liara was asleep.

"Will she be alright?" Shiala asked quietly.

Benezia's eyes seeing the room clearly again, looked to her companion Kyriake who was holding a cup of sitruuna, waiting on her. Benezia took the cup and thanked her, then looked at Shiala, "She will be fine. And you?"

Shiala bowed her head, "We failed to locate the krogan who led the attack. For that I failed you. Do with me as you see fit."

Benezia looked at Shiala and smiled weakly, "You brought Liara back safe. For that I give you my blessings. Now go and tell the others that it would please me if they had a meal while they waited ... that includes you."

"Thank you mistress." Shiala smiled, looked down at Liara and bowed before she left.

Benezia took a sip then handed the cup back to Kyriake. She then lifted her sleeping daughter as she stood up and carried her to the pallet. As she put her daughter down, Liara began to shake slightly in her sleep and Benezia pressed her daughter's hand to her own heart, "It is okay Little Wing, I am here. Be calm. Be rested." As Liara began to calm, Benezia kissed her on the cheek, rose up and went back over to the lounge chair and sat.

"What are your plans regarding Saren?" Kyriake asked as she placed a cold cloth on the Matriarch's forehead.

Benezia laid her head back, closed her eyes as the cloth was pressed against her and took Kyriake 's hand. "Kyri, it all depends on what my informants bring back." Benezia had reached out to her network of spies and was waiting on whatever information she received regarding Saren's current status and activities. Nothing in over 3 years had come back and it worried her. It was as if whatever he was doing was in some black hole … "I may have to go to him."

* * *

Liara loved to take her meals here and had so since her first years at the University … she loved sitting on the bench that faced the memorial to her ancestor the Justicar Cerelia T'Soni. It was an exact copy of the one back home in Armali in the city center park just in front of the T'Soni Tower and the Temple Of Athane ... the memorial was a water etching of Cerelia carrying her dead lover, Pastora, across a battlefield and had been commissioned by Liara's great-great grandmother. The water flowed down, up and sideways as the etching moved. Cerelia could be seen walking, looking at her dead lover and crying. Now after the loss of her friend she felt a closer connection to Cerelia and she wondered if she would ever have someone care for her like that. As she sat looking at it she saw Nicia just to the left walking in the park with her new companion and bondmate causing her to smile.

Liara rose up, tossing the remains of her meal in the waste bin, picked up her netbag and walked over to her. "Dr. T'Lemk, how are you?"

Nicia looked at her, pain flashed across her eyes briefly, and then she smiled, "Dr. T'Soni. It is so good to see you again. Do you know Master Professor Jampers?"

Liara smiled at her bondmate, "Yes of course. I took salarian history with you."

Jampers smiled, "Yes. I am now also offering human history. You should sit in if you have time. They are quite fascinating to study … We are focused on the politics, arts and social norms of the 1500's as of the moment. Ah, the art that came out of the country Repubblica Italiana at that time …"

Nicia cut her mate off, "I think that my mate has a fascination with them. It reminds me of you and the protheans."

Liara smiled and looked at Nicia's protruding stomach, "My congratulations and wished blessings on you and your daughter."

Nicia rubbed her stomach as she looked at Liara, "Thank you. We are both excited. And what about you?"

Liara smiled, "I am still working at the Guildhall and now training at Eli."

Nicia stepped closer to Liara, "You aren't thinking of becoming a commando are you?"

Liara saw the worry on Nicia's face and reached out and held her wrist, "No. I would make a terrible commando." They both laughed, "I'm afraid that with me on the battlefield it would probably be more danger to my side than the other."

Nicia relaxed and placed her hand over Liara's, "I am glad to hear that. Not that you would be a danger to your side, but that you are not becoming a commando. So, what is it like at Elibio Academy? I always wanted to attend but other things took my time."

Liara thought of her training session just that morning where she accidently placed the trainer in a stasis field and in trying to fix the error had thrown the trainer out the window. "At least the window was open," the trainer had noted as she crawled back into the room through the same window. Liara smiled, "It's got its surprises."

Nicia laughed, "With you in the class, I'm sure it does."

As the three parted ways, Liara was happy that Nicia had gained everything that she had wanted. Master Professor Jampers was the most respected asari at the University and the daughter of Matriarch Jampers. They had chosen a Turian commander, one of Jampers close friends, to use as the secondary parent opening future doors for their daughter. _Yes, Nicia has everything that she ever wanted_. Liara smiled at the thought.

Nicia had turned to look at Liara once as they walked away, _why couldn't you have been older? I would have made you so happy, Liara. Now if I can just stop thinking about you … about us._


	31. Comets & The Buckhorn

"You need to stop thinking about her," the Lieutenant advised her fellow Officer who was too busy throwing up on the side of the club to respond. The three uniformed officers outside the club Rumourz were part of the Systems Alliance six member Comets which was a program that was based off the United States Navy's Navy Flight Demonstration Squadron, popularly known as the Blue Angels. The Alliance used the team to go around the homeworld doing air shows in the A/D-18 fighter jets for recruitment purposes. The Comets were in town for the weekend 'Alliance Fair and Air Show' that was scheduled to start that next Thursday through Sunday at the Randolph Air Force Base. With the decrease in enlistments in the past few years the Alliance needed to get young men and women excited about life abroad in the stars. This was one of the Alliance's ways to get out into communities and publicize … you might even say glamorize life as a soldier.

Captain August Roux, the Commander of the crew, stood back as Lt. Greer tried to comfort the recently divorced and currently drunk Lt. Vasilyev. August had not wanted to come but Greer had begged her to take her to a gay bar for a look, while Vasilyev went for the kicks. August was a lesbian and Greer had told her that she was sick of men and maybe a woman would be better. The Captain had responded that she doubted it but if she wanted to go to a gay club … and there they were. Greer had been dancing with a few gals, Vasilyev was getting "kicked" by the shots of tequila that he had been slamming for the past few hours and August was bored.

August understood Vasilyev's pain as her own lover of ten years had left her just two years prior. Granted, she had been away the majority of the time as she served in the Terminus Systems but it was good to know that she had someone back home, waiting for her. When her lover informed her that she couldn't take being with someone who was always away, August had accepted the position with the Comets to try and spend more time at their home in Bordeaux, or at least on Earth. But even that was not good enough and they eventually separated with August moving out. _It's not like you ever moved in_, she had thought at the time. So here she was two years later as the lead of her squad, ground-side if you will, watching a fellow officer puking outside a gay bar. She was just about to say goodnight when a taxi cab pulled up and a young woman appeared.

August had never seen anyone as striking as the passenger but quickly realized that she was young, _can't be older than twenty-two_, she thought to herself. The female looked over at Vasilyev, who was heaving again, and August saw disgust on her face. _No, not disgust. Anger? No. Pain? Yes. Pain._ The female quickly turned away and was greeted by a much older woman who led her into the club. "Okay Captain, maybe we should go back inside." Greer said as she helped steady Vasilyev.

All Shepard wanted was a drink and the headache to go away. She had thrown up when she got home and as she stood under the hot water in the shower she had forced her mind to focus on Manny, his arms and his dark wavy hair. The shadow people were too close and all Shepard wanted was to go to sleep and hide away. But she had promised Teddy that she would watch him perform so she put on a black dress, heels and called a taxi. When she had arrived the woman that reminded her of Aunt B was outside smoking and threw the cigarette to the side as the cab driver opened her door, "Let me help you out, miss." The cabbie had grinned, extending his hand.

Shepard smiled as she took it and carefully exited; as her dress was want to show a little more skin then she had desired. _Why did you wear this dress tonight?_ She thought. _Manny isn't with you … _She stopped as she saw the woman that looked so much like her Aunt B. _Frick! Not tonight._ She was about to try and avoid her when she saw the officer throwing up. Memories of Mindoir flooded in as she remembered the soldiers pinned down getting sick as they watched what the batarian raiders were doing to the colonists. She had seen them from the rooftop throwing up, crying and at times praying as they watched helpless and trapped. She quickly turned away as the woman greeted her, "Hi! My name is Kevina and you must be Shepard?"

Shepard forced a smile as her head started throbbing harder, "Yes."

"Margarita told me to make sure that you got in safe," the woman said as she tried to put her arm around Shepard. "Some of these bulls don't have any fuckin' manners."

Shepard sidestepped her arm, "I am sure that I will be okay. But thank you."

As Shepard entered the club Kevina told the door person that Shepard was a guest of Margarita La Cha Cha's which resulted in her not being carded or charged. Shepard had hoped that she would be stopped without Teddy and turned away due to her age. No such luck. Shepard didn't look at the crowd once she was inside but focused on finding the table that Teddy had reserved. She finally saw the reserved sign and as she headed for it she felt the press of the crowd against her, making her wish even more that she was at home and tucked safely in bed. As she sat down Kevina appeared and took off her jacket, placing it on the chair next to Shepard's seat and asked what she would like to drink. Shepard thinking it might keep the woman away from her for a while yelled over the music, "Jameson Whiskey on the rocks with a glass of water on the side."

"Sure thing, hon." Kevina shouted back. "You want a lemon in your water?"

Shepard shook her head no and Kevina disappeared into the crowd. _Please be a long line at the bar_. Shepard with her eyes closed began slowly rolling her head from side to side, stretching her neck to try and relieve some of the tension. As she opened her eyes there stood an Alliance officer smiling and holding a glass of red wine.

"Thought you might be thirsty," she said slightly above the noise as she put the glass in front of Shepard. "I'm August."

Shepard smiled, picked up the glass and handed it back. "Thanks but I have a drink coming."

"What?" August grinned as she put her hand to her ear, pretended not to hear with a playful shrug and glance at a speaker.

"I said, no thank you," Shepard answered as she bent a little forward in hopes that it helped carry her voice to the Officer.

August liked the way the top of the dress revealed her bust just a little when the girl bent forward. So she mouthed 'What?' hoping she would bend farther. Shepard caught the quick glance, frowned and sat back.

Just then the woman arrived with Shepard's whiskey and looked at August with a glare. "Here is your drink sweetie. Is this soldier bothering you?"

Before Shepard could say anything the officer extended her hand to the woman, "Captain August Roux of the Systems Alliance. And you are?"

"Kevina Johnson, Attorney at Law." Shepard watched as they shook hands and she could see that the handshake was a little mini-dick measuring match. _Teddy I am going to kill you_. Shepard grabbed her glass and without adding water or hesitating emptied it in one swift gulp. Both women watched her and then looked at each other. Shepard got up, excused herself and went to the ladies room. As she entered she found an open sink and stood before it with her hands on the sides. _Okay Shepard. Relax and just enjoy tonight_.

After Shepard went to the ladies room, August re-joined her mates at the bar and kept an eye out for the girl to return. She watched her re-appear, slip through the crowd gracefully and sit next to the attorney. August tried to focus on her mates, check out other females in the club … but she couldn't help but return to Shepard. As the drag queens entertained the crowd, the girl continued to keep her attention. She could see that Shepard worked out by her arms and legs. _Shit, her legs._ Her legs were that of a dancer, muscular and long causing August to lose her concentration every time the young woman moved them or ran a hand down them. Even the way that she sat, back straight, legs closed … _Your momma raised you proper_. August smiled.

Shepard enjoyed the show and Teddy's performance as Margarita La Cha Cha made her laugh with absolute delight. She also knew that Teddy, like her, had a very teasing personality and she wasn't surprised, although she was a little embarrassed, when he told the women in the crowd, "This is my roommate, Shepard. She's just broken up with a horrible woman and is looking for a good woman to teach her the true ways of Sappho … aren't you dear?" He smiled innocently at her as he had the spotlight put on her. "If there are any takers, please see me after the show." The audience laughed as Teddy made her stand to "show off your wares, honey!" with a few cat calls thrown in. Shepard, after having two glasses of whiskey, her headache had faded but she was starting to feel a little buzz as she stood. As the show finished, Shepard carefully stood up and after excusing herself went outside to get some fresh air.

It was chilly out but it felt good to her and as she thought about Teddy's little tease at her from onstage she couldn't help but laugh a little, plotting on how she would get him back.

"Let me in on the joke?" August said as she approached Shepard.

Shepard looked at the Alliance Officer, thought of Lt. Zabaleta and smiled. "A private joke. Sorry."

August took her smile as an invitation to flirt and she looked at Shepard's nipples pushing hard against her dress, "Cold?"

Shepard looked where she was looking and put her arms over her breasts, "Don't do that. I don't like it."

August was caught off-guard by her firm response and looked embarrassed, "Forgive me. I've never been good at the dating game. How about, can I buy you a drink?"

"I'm sorry … uh," Shepard looked at her uniform.

"Captain August Roux of the Systems Alliance, but you can call me August." She answered a little disappointed that Shepard hadn't remembered her name.

"August." Shepard repeated, "Well August … I'm sure that you do well in the dating game considering the uniform, I hear women like them. But I am straight so you might want to find some other girl to spend your money and time on."

"Straight? But the … ugh, La Cha Cha …"

Shepard couldn't help but smile thinking of her friend's comment, "Well he was just getting back at me for something earlier."

"Now I feel silly," August smiled as she took off her Captain's hat and placed it under her arm. "Please let me buy you a drink to make up for my inappropriate comment."

"Thank you," Shepard replied. "But I think I will find my friend now. It was nice meeting you August."

As Shepard began to walk back into the club August couldn't stop herself as she caught Shepard by the arm, "Wait!"

Shepard stopped and looked at the hand … She knew that if she grabbed the wrist, squeezed hard enough to compress the blood vessels and nerves it would cause pain and force August to let her go. She had practiced it enough on Tait when they were training together. _Tait._ The pain of thinking about him made her angrier and she caught herself glaring at the person who made her revive the beautiful blond boy … if only for a second.

August sensing her anger removed her hand, "I'm sorry."

Shepard brushed back her hair as she tried to calm herself. _It's not this person's fault Shepard. Be nice._ "It's okay."

August put her hat back on and as she adjusted her watch said, "I was just hoping that you might show me around your lovely town while I am here."

Shepard was getting a little frustrated with the Officer's persistence and was about to say no when she thought again of the Officer that had found her, of his kindness. She looked at the door of the club as people moved in and out, sighed and looked back at August. "We can meet for lunch tomorrow at a café close by here, if that is okay?"

August smiled, "Perfect." Shepard gave August the name and directions to the café then left the Captain_. What are you doing, Auggie? You're too old to … ah, hell. What are you chasing a young girl for? You have to be ten years older than her. Are you into torture?_ As August was mentally beating herself up, Greer came out.

"Hey Captain, we wondered where you went."

"So did I," August joked back.

* * *

It had been a rough morning on Shepard at the warehouse. Every crate that she was moving had The Mindoir Nokeic Mining Company stamped on it. This brought the warehouse chatter back to Mindoir '70 as that raid was called with people talking about the eight miners that were found alive in one of the tunnels, the 262 colonists found hidden in the hills which then brought them around to discuss the heroics of the Sheriff herself who helped save those lives and gave her life in the process.

"What was that Sheriff's name?" Shepard heard someone ask. "Birgit Hallestrøm" came the response and it made her heart sink.

Shepard kept her forklift in motion, trying to avoid these conversations and at lunchtime asked Mondale if he wanted to head to the Buckhorn Saloon.

Once there, Shepard ordered a BLT sandwich and tea while Mondale ordered The Buckhorn, Fried Twinkie and coffee. "I am too tired today to be working these hours." Mondale griped. "Marge had me out with a group of her friends clubbing. I hate clubbing!"

Shepard looked at her watch and began to smile for the first time since starting work, "I stayed out a little late last night myself."

Mondale looked suspiciously at his friend, "Why the Cheshire grin?"

Shepard knew that while she and Mondale were having lunch Manny was meeting August at the café. _Sorry August but if you want to see San Antonio then Manny knows this place much better than I,_ she thought and then laughed out loud. "Sorry Dale, I had someone put the moves on me last night and I am sending a message."

"Do you need me to set the guy straight?" Mondale asked.

"No, she is getting the message right about now." Shepard answered as she pulled her hair back from her face and put it in a ponytail.

"She?" Mondale looked at Shepard, mouth open.

Shepard thanked the waitress as she served their drinks and looked at Mondale, "An Alliance Officer. Very attractive and if I were into women she would be tempting …"

Mondale pushed his coffee away and leaned closer to Shepard. "I didn't know you were into women."

Shepard shook her head, "You weren't listening … or your hearing stopped at-"

"Very attractive and tempting." He grinned.

Shepard laughed, "Okay! She is attractive but not … well, not my cup of tea. Mine is 6 feet tall, caramel skin and male!"

"So where did you meet her and how did she hit on you. And please make this story sexy, even if you have to lie."

"I met her at a club that Teddy, my roommate, performs at in drag and she asked if I would show her San Antonio … so I sent Manny."

Mondale laughed, "First, that wasn't sexy … second, I'm sure she wanted you to show her something other than San Antonio … and third, that wasn't sexy."

The two stopped talking as the waitress brought their food and as they ate Shepard's mind went back to the 262 colonists on the hill. The story of how her Aunt B had saved them came to her mind and she looked out at the other tables trying to find something to distract her. "I hope that the Captain and Manny get along." She said as she watched two old men laughing with each other.

"Does Manny know that she hit on you?" Mondale asked as he took a bite of his burger.

"No. I just told him that I had met a really nice person and that she needed a tour guide." Shepard smiled. "You know how he loves showing off his city."

"What if the Officer thinks you did tell him that she was putting the girly-girl on you and says something to him?"

"Like what?" Shepard smiled and then said in a voice similar to August's, "Hi, I hit on your girlfriend last night."

"She could panic under the pressure and say just that!" Mondale said as he pushed fries in his mouth.

"She's a soldier so she should be good under pressure … right?" Shepard reasoned.

"True, and if she does panic what's the worst thing she could do … besides kill your boyfriend?"

* * *

August had arrived on time, dressed in her uniform and found that she was actually nervous. Shepard had awoken a part of her that had been dormant for a long time. As she lay in bed that morning she had found herself thinking about Shepard … well, her lips, legs and hard nipples and for the first time in months touched herself. _You are acting like you are sixteen again, Auggie. Stop it! You are a thirty-three year old woman ... A Captain in the Alliance._ Now as she stood at parade rest outside the cafe she watched as a male pulled up in a tow truck that read Castillo's Garage & Tow. She wasn't into guys but it didn't mean that she was blind. She could see that he was attractive and if she thought her "boy gauge" was off, well the women around her confirmed that he was indeed very attractive_. Boxer in his part time?_ She thought as he jumped out of the truck showing off his solid frame and strong arms. The man smiled at her and began to walk towards her … _Sorry fella! You are about to strike out!_

"Are you August?" Manny asked as he extended his hand and smiled.

August caught off-guard as to why a tow truck driver would know her said, "Captain August Roux of the Systems Alliance. And you are?"

"Jesus Castillo." He smiled with his hand still extended, "Shepard sent me."

At the mention of her name, August smiled and shook his hand as she looked at the truck to see if she was there. "And Shepard is …?"

"She's at work." Manny responded causing August's smile to fade slightly. "But if you want a tour of San Antonio you are better off with me. Shepard has only lived here for a little over a year … not that she doesn't know a lot of the city."

August looked at Manny, "Where did she move from?"

"Somewhere back east, I believe." He answered still smiling. "But, she does know the city fairly well considering I took her everywhere when we first started dating. I figured that if she was looking at the Alamo, the river walk … hell, even the Buckhorn Museum … she wouldn't see how nervous I was."

"Dating?" August asked. As he responded with a yes, she almost laughed, _I get the message girl_. Manny was telling her how they met and then asked if she was ready to see his town. As she spent the day with him she hated to admit it but she liked him. She was so ready to find fault in him and yet with his easy-going manner, soft laugh and happy eyes she admitted defeat. By the end of the day she felt as if she had made a new friend and so she asked if he would like tickets to the 'Alliance Fair and Air Show' at the Randolph Air Force Base the following Saturday. When he said yes and that he would bring Shepard with him she almost felt guilty. Almost.

"You ever thought about joining the Alliance, Jesus?" August asked as he drove her back to her hotel that evening. The Alliance had seen a drop in recruitment as of late and Manny had a strong build suited for the military.

"No." He answered. "I was born here in San Antonio and I'll die here … besides, I have my own business. I also don't see me leaving Shepard. Once we're married I plan on us having a couple kids at least, Shepard can be a full-time mother if she wants …"

As Manny talked about his dreams, August felt a kinship of sorts with him. That is what she had wanted with her ex. "Well, if you love her … keep her close and tell her you love her every day. Trust me."


	32. Spine Lock Flight

"But I don't trust you," Liara said as she pulled away.

"Why not Little?" Shiala giggled. "I promise it won't hurt me … much."

Shiala had been trying to help Liara on the non-biotic hand to hand combat course required at the Elibio Academy and they were now at the spinal lock section, simply called 'Spine Lock' by the Eli students. Liara had asked Shiala if she would spar with her in secret and they had been meeting for the last week in the grand ballroom of the T'Soni Estate while the Matriarch was away on holiday with Kyri in Messonia. The Academy believed that all its students should be prepared for anything, even losing their biotic abilities. This part of the course had been a struggle for Liara and she was getting marks against her as a result of low to non-participation.

What Liara did not know was that the Matriarch had cut her holiday short when she had received word from the headmistress of the Academy, Aminta DIjam, that there was a problem. Benezia had promised Kyri that she would make it up to her later but that she needed to fly to Serrice and meet with DIjam to discuss her daughter's training.

* * *

As Benezia was served sitruuna in the headmistresses' private office she looked at the wall with images of past students and there was Arena T'Louck. Aminta seeing where her gaze was smiled, "That is Arena T'Louck ... she was the most gifted student that I've ever seen in the seven centuries that I have been here ... Liara could challenge her for that honor if only ... well."

Benezia smiled knowing that if Aethyta had heard that comment she would have put it in her arsenal of breeding myths debunked bag. Aethyta ... she would be just too proud to know that Liara was a student here. Benezia however felt otherwise. She had hoped that her daughter would never have a need to really know how to survive in combat. To live in peace and harmony with others unlike what she had seen in the past. But here she was ... "This is a beautiful set." ... The Matriarch said as she started the visit in a serene and uplifting place as was custom.

"Thank you, Matriarch." Aminta smiled. "It was made five centuries ago in your city ... Only Armali knows how to make a proper sitruuna tea set."

The Matriarch smiled as she took a sip and placed it gently back in the saucer. "Thank you ... They say that Athame herself taught the asari of Armali how to craft the perfect set as well as the ritual of evocation."

"It is a shame that we are no longer encouraged to practice that form of mating ... asari with asari. To mate within the ritual of evocation." Aminta frowned as she waved away her staff. Both the Matriarch and the headmistress were purebloods and this was just one other reason why the headmistress wanted Liara to not be turned away from the school.

The Matriarch smiled ... Liara had been a result of that ritual. She had wished that Aethyta had been trained proper by her mother ... it would have made the experience so much more fulfilling for her. But at least Aethyta had given her best and that was enough for Benezia. "Yes, well one day we will return to the ways of old."

Aminta smiled, "I believe that as well, Matriarch. I do not oppose mixing with others but ... to discourage the purity of a line. Sometimes I wish that we had not advanced from Thessia."

The Matriarch looked at the amber colored liquid in her cup, "My mother saw the mixing as weakening who we are."

"Diatheirós," Aminta softly whispered.

Benezia jerked up, caught off gaurd by the use of her mother's word. "That is what she called it."

"So did my mother," Aminta sighed. "When I mated outside of our kind she would not acknowledge my daughter ... _she is a diatheirós_, she told me. After that ... my remaining two daughters were from my asari daer."

Benezia could see that it had hurt the headmistress, "There is no power like a mother's tongue."

Aminta nodded and then she voiced her concern, "No power ... that is why I have asked you here. Your daughter has great potential but she has started pulling back. I understand that there have been some accidents these past few years …"

Benezia listened as Aminta went through Liara's history of errors from destroying a table, throwing her trainer out a window, sending a fellow student through a wall just to start. As the list grew and Benezia heard the words 'fire', 'screaming' and 'shattered' she couldn't help but start to laugh. _My Little Wing, how you do amuse me with your curiosity, earnestness and missteps_. Aminta stopped talking at the sound of the Matriarch's laughter. Benezia seeing the confusion on her face explained ..."I am sorry Headmistress DIjam, but these errors are quite familiar to the T'Soni house. My daughter has an amazing ability to cause havoc that in turn works somehow to her advantage. I would not want her gift of ... how should I call it ... _awkwardness_? I would not want that to be taken from her."

Aminta smiled, "Matriarch, I am not saying that these … uh, events are unacceptable. Quite the contrary, they show her potential in strength, ingenuity and even good luck. However, if she does not stop holding back in the non-biotic combat part of the training then we have a real concern."

Benezia placed her hands on her lap, "Non-biotic combat?"

"Yes ... we train the students in hand-to-hand combat as a back-up," Aminta explained. "As you know, when using biotics there are times that one must regain their strength during battle. In those moments one would convert their technique to pure physical strength alone ... as they recharge if you will. We teach the students how to not only cripple and maim their enemy but also to kill swiftly."

Benezia looked at the pattern on her cup thinking how that would impact her daughter, "To kill with her hands alone? Hmmm." Benezia thought of her daughter and her gentle nature and could not see her taking a life. To use one's hands ... stripped of weapons or biotics ... was the most brutal. Liara would sense this instinctually. "She is holding back because not only is this the hardest way to kill but my daughter would also be afraid to hurt others even in practice."

"Precisely my thought as well," Aminta said in agreement and then added, "This makes her incapable of defending herself in a real world situation. Now I realize that she is not slated for the military but … well, life is such an unplanned event, isn't it."

Benezia thought of Aethoyner and then of Saren and frowned. "I would be of the same mind in this … This is unacceptable. Liara must be able to protect herself."

"Yes, once again, we are in agreement," Aminta said as she poured more tea. "But I am at a loss. We have tried everything … everything except …"

Benezia looked at Aminta with a deadly gaze, "Exposure to unchained hand-to-hand combat and ... pain."

Aminta looked away, feeling her skin crawl under Benezia's deadly gaze. "I would not approve without your consent, of course. But this is the last step before we fade someone out of the Academy."

Benezia thought of Liara being hurt and it left her cold_. How can I stand by as someone hurts … beats my daughter. _Benezia turned the cup on the saucer as she weighed the matter. _But if she cannot protect herself … it could be her undoing. Her death. I cannot leave her defenseless_. Benezia struggled in thought as she felt her own anger build inside. "I will see to it." Benezia said as she rose. "This will be done under my care only."

"I understand," Aminta said. "I too had to do this with two of my daughters. I can arrange a trainer for you if you desire? She helped just recently with one of my daughter's daughter. I had hoped that my daughters would be spared this step in motherhood. Two were ... one wasn't."

Benezia thanked her, "That would be appreciated ... I would not want nor allow one of my staff to touch Liara in that way. And given that the ones most qualified have also known her since her infancy they would not accept my request ... of which I am grateful."

"They would deny your instruction?" Aminta was surprised given the Matriarch's ability to lead.

Benezia smiled as a proud mother, "My daughter has captured the hearts of my closest and most trusted acolytes."

Aminta thought of the young asari and smiled ... Liara was sweet-natured, courteous and respectful. "Knowing your daughter just these three years I must confess that I would have had a hard time overseeing this as well."

"Can you have them arrive at my estate in Armali tomorrow at mid-day?" Benezia asked, feeling tired of heart.

"Consider it done," Aminta bowed. "It has been an honor, Matriach Benezia ... peace to you and your household."

* * *

"I'm never going to get these joint locks!" Liara frowned as she sat down.

Shiala shook her head and sat next to her, "Little, you are quicker than me so you should be running through this with your eyes closed."

Liara thought of the spinal locks and what could go wrong to her opponent if it was too forceful or sudden. "I could really hurt someone … even kill them."

Shiala smiled, "Little, you can do the same thing in your biotics training."

"But this would be with my hands ... I would be touching them, Shiala. My own hands could kill them."

Shiala put her arm around Liara, "But you won't, at least not in practice. But there may come a day that it will be necessary."

"I couldn't kill anyone," Liara shook her head. "I can't stand it when I hurt someone in practice."

"Not even to protect a friend," Shiala asked, "A friend like Zazzy?"

Liara looked away and thought about that day. "That won't happen again."

Shiala took Liara by the chin and turned her face back towards her, "No it won't, because you will be prepared."

Liara shook her head at Shiala and removed her hand, "I'm sorry, but I think I need to tell mother that I can't continue the training."

As if on cue, Benezia entered the ballroom, "Shiala, please step away from Liara."

Shiala bowed at the Matriarch and then stepped to the wall opposite her, "Yes, Matriarch."

"Mother? I thought you and Ky-" Liara was about to run to her mother when the Matriarch held up her hand. Instead she stayed within the ring that Shiala had created in the center of the ballroom using chairs.

Benezia looked at her young daughter, knew that she had been through so much already, but knew that this had to be done. "Liara, no matter what happens you are not to leave this area."

"Mother?" Liara had never seen her mother look so removed from her and it scared her.

"You may enter now," The Matriarch called out and three commandos, that neither Shiala nor Liara had ever seen, walked into the ballroom and stood behind the Matriarch. Benezia looked back at the leader, "Phrixas, this is my daughter."

Phrixas bowed to the Matriarch and then looked at Liara. "Do I have your permission to start, Matriarch?"

Benezia, showing no emotion, gave her approval and then turned, walking twenty paces to a chair located next to the wall of mirrors and sat down. Kyriake had begged Benezia not to do this and debated on being present but it was just too much not knowing so she finally entered the ballroom with a pensive look. Benezia saw her enter and motioned for her to sit next to her, which Kyriake did in silence.

Phrixas looked at Liara as the two commandos removed the chairs. Once the chairs were pulled away Phrixas walked slowly to Liara. As Liara looked away from the commando to look at her mother, Phrixas backhanded her causing Liara to stumble backwards, "Look at me, not the Matriarch."

Shiala moved towards the commando when she saw Benezia stand and motion her away with a deadly stare. Shiala, realizing what was about to happen, looked away from the main floor and watched the events unfold in the reflection on a glass vase. Somehow it made it easier, although it did not stop the tears that would slide down Shiala's face as the pressure and pain on Liara increased over the next hour plus.

Benezia's stare was meant for Phrixas as she saw her hit her daughter but she took that fire and re-directed it at her acolyte. She knew that if she did not allow this force upon Liara it would keep her daughter weak and defenseless. Benezia quickly erected a wall internally and placed the part of her that wanted to tear the commando to shreds behind it ... The part of her called 'Mother'.

Liara looked at Phrixas, hand on her cheek and tears in her eyes. "You hit me!"

"I will do much worse by the time this day is over," Phrixas smiled. "Unless you care to stop me."

Liara looked over at her mother who remained cold and removed from her, "Mother?"

Phrixas backhanded Liara again, harder this time, and Liara fell to the ground. She was confused, her face stinging and tears falling down her cheeks_. Get up Liara, do not be weak_. Benezia thought behind her wall. _I cannot allow you to be weak with your enemies. You must stand and fight_.

Phrixas laughed and pulled Liara up by her throat, "You like that? You don't want to stop me? Maybe you can't, is that it?" she laughed at Liara, "Are you sure that you are the daughter of Matriarch Benezia?" Liara looked at Phrixas, tears in her eyes and back at her mother. Phrixas curled up her hand into a fist and brought it into Liara's gut knocking the wind out of her. Liara fell to the ground unable to breath and as Shiala and Kyriake fought to not protect Liara, Benezia remained calm. Calm in appearance but hurting inside_, Little Wing … You must fight! Please get up. I cannot always protect you_.

Phrixas continued to make aggressive contact with Liara who had slowly started to try and get away, half-heartedly pushing the commando, then she started to fight just a little. Liara swung countless times without true focus or conviction of purpose and as a result missed again and again. With every miss she was greeted with another hit, or a kick and always laughter. An hour in and Liara still had not broken through her wall of restraint. Phrixas looked over at the Matriarch and looked back down at a bruised and bleeding Liara.

Kyriake whispered, "You are going to let her kill Liara?"

Benezia thinking of Aethoyner and Saren glared at her private companion, "I am trying to save my daughter. Do not question what I allow or do with my daughter … ever."

Kyriake felt each word from the Matriarch cut into her and realized that every punch, every kick, every cry from Liara was tearing her mistress apart. "Forgive me," Kyriake choked out as Benezia turned from her to look at her daughter lying on the floor.

After another thirty minutes passed and Liara was knocked back on her knees yet again, Benezia stood and walked between Phrixas and her daughter recognizing that Liara needed a greater reason to fight back. She had hoped that Liara would not need this as motivation, that she would see her own importance, her own value and fight. But that had not happened, so Benezia went to plan b that she had discussed with Phrixas. She wanted to see if Liara could, at least, fight with everything if it meant helping or saving someone she cared about.

Phrixas looked at the Matriarch, bowed her head and then looked back up at her as she backhanded the Matriarch with every bit of her strength. The Matriarch's head swung back and blood splattered. Liara had been on her knees, behind her when she looked up and saw the violence against her mother. Her mother's blood splattered on her face and clothes and seeing her mother moved against in violence caused a blue hot bolt to run through her. Without thought Liara pushed her mother to the side of her, threw up her right hand and with everything she had she pushed the commando up and away. Phrixas had no time to protect herself, the response from Liara was so quick and powerful … She crashed into and past the great chandelier and out the glass roof, landing over a hundred plus feet away badly injured.

As the glass, diamonds and adama began falling from the shattered chandelier and ceiling Liara formed a barrier around her mother and her for protection. Shiala crawled under a table as Kyriake ran from the room with the two other commandos. As Kyriake and the two commandos ran to Phrixas, Benezia looked over at her daughter who was breathing hard and shaking. As the room settled, with just an occasional sound of falling pieces to the floor, Liara released the barrier and Shiala crawled out from under the table.

Shiala wandered onto the ballroom floor not far from the Matriarch and Liara, picked up a diamond, and half-heartedly smiled over at the Matriarch, "This is fixable … maybe?"

Benezia looking at her custom chandelier now in pieces, rolled her eyes … _Well, this was a start. Not the start I wanted but at least I know that you can protect others when needed_. As Benezia slowly moved towards the center of the room and looked up at the hole in her ceiling. "Shiala, isn't rain expected soon?"

Shiala crunched over glass to the Matriarch and looked up at the hole next to her, "Storm I believe. This evening."

Benezia sighed, "Of course, why not a storm. And this very evening." Benezia then turned back to her daughter, walked over and while extending her hand down said, "Stand up my hero."

Liara looked up at her mother, blood on the chin of Benezia, "Mother, I failed you didn't I?"

Benezia bent down on one knee and placed a hand on her daughter's cheek, "Never. But you must learn to fight for you … you, Liara. You would not want me to lose what is most important, would you?"

Liara shook her head, "No mother."

"Then you must promise me that you will protect my most precious gift in life. Promise!"

"Of course mother, I will protect it. Do you want me to hold on to it?"

Tears formed in Benezia's eyes at her daughter's words. "Liara, I am talking about you."

Liara looked up at her mother, wide-eyed, and then hugged Benezia as she cried. "Mother, I will try.

After the Matriarch left the ballroom, Kyriake arrived with a med-kit to patch up Liara. As she passed the shattered chandelier she said, "I always hated that thing."

"Maybe mother did too?" Liara hoped.

"Not likely," Shaila and Kyriake said in unison which made all three laugh.

As Liara was being patched up, Kyriake teased, "You sure did throw that commando far ... Over a hundred feet. I wonder if that is a record of sorts."

Liara looked embarrassed as Shiala, who was looking at the hole in the ceiling as rain started to fall said, "Her flight was almost pretty."

Liara and Kyriake both looked at Shiala with Kyriake saying "What?"

Shiala looked at them, "You must admit, her flight was pretty graceful."


	33. Pepe Meets Peaches

"That flight of the Comets was pretty impressive," Manny was telling Mondale as Shepard and Marge looked for the nearest ladies room.

"Dale," Marge interrupted, "Shepard and I are going to the restroom … go get me a turkey leg."

Mondale argued that she had just eaten nachos, cotton candy and a deep fried snicker which in turn caused her to start complaining that a true man did not tell a woman what she had eaten … "Not if he loved her!"

Manny looked at Shepard and they quietly walked away from the bickering couple, "If that ever becomes us, please just shoot me." Manny had teased her. Shepard looked away from him at that remark and Manny could see that she was upset. "Did I say something wrong?" Manny asked.

Shepard forced a smile and kissed him on the cheek, "No, I'm just a little off today."

With the bickering stopped for the moment, Mondale and Marge rejoined the two and Marge pulled Shepard to the restrooms. "So are you and Jesus getting married?" Marge asked once they were both out of the porta-potties.

Shepard looked over at her as she washed her hands, "Not at this point in time."

"Honey, I know that you are a few years younger than me … but - you better rope that man and brand him now." She advised and then laughed. "I might even try and steal him if you wait too long!"

As they returned to the men, Marge pointed over to a stuffed animal at a ring toss booth, "Dale, get me a dolphin!"

"Ah Marge," Mondale griped, "I thought that we would head over to the rides."

"If you loved me you would win me a dolphin!" The two began bickering about how a dolphin would or would not show that he loved her.

Manny smiled at Shepard, "Do you want a dolphin?"

Shepard smiled, "No, I don't need one to know how you feel about me. Besides, it would be cheaper to buy me a diamond ring then if you won me a stuffed anything through that game."

"So you doubt my ring toss ability?"Manny asked as he pulled her close. "Let me tell you lady … I am the king ring toss man of San Anto- no" he stopped mid-stream, "I am the king ring toss man of all Texas! I will win you a stuffed animal or my name isn't Jesus Emmanuel Castillo."

Shepard laughed at her boyfriend as he walked over to the booth as Popeye. Marge, seeing Manny heading over, pulled Mondale towards the booth as well, nagging him the whole way. "See! Jesus loves Shepard ... Why can't you treat me like he does her?"

Shepard was about to follow when she saw a sight that she had not seen since she was sixteen years old. The Anatolius cliffs were on a large poster board in a booth about thirty feet away. Shepard left her group and walked as if in a dream towards the cliffs. She could almost hear her old gang laughing, Ricky yelling her name while Freddy made some lame joke and Tyler mooned everyone. The many weekends and summer days that she had spent on that cliff … _All gone now_, Shepard thought as she reached the booth that had a sign reading 'Mindoir '70 … Never Forget!' There were pictures of her hometown all clean and pristine and pictures showing the last Founders Day celebration.

That was at the end of '69 and she had helped her mom and some of her parishioners bake pies for the church booth. Shepard began to smile as she looked at the picture closer and saw her mother's booth. The picture must have been taking while Hannah had broken away for a moment because Shepard didn't see her in the picture. _Look at you_, she thought to herself, _You've been avoiding your past and now you are trying … hoping to see your mother._

She then noticed the table that had pads with names on them and holo images of people. She went over to one of the pads and she realized that it was the names of the dead ... the citizens of Mindoir that had not survived. You scrolled through and when you touched a name on the pad the person's image would pop up with a short bio or stats. Shepard began scrolling and before she knew it she was looking at the name _Shepard, Pierce E._ and her heart began to beat harder. Without thinking, she touched his name and her father's image popped up. He was smiling and next to his face was the following info:

Pierce Ethan Shepard (1/11/2122 – 9/01/2170) Manager of Haakon Electrical & Plumbing Company

Shepard looked at his face … a face that she hadn't seen in over a year and she felt the tears rolling down her cheeks. The image was of her father about 10 years before the raid and it made it easier to look at him like that. Even with the tears she couldn't help but smile at his smiling face, "I miss you daddy," she whispered as she reached out and through his image. "Nothing has been the same without you and momma. I'm afraid that I haven't really handled this well. I ran away … I'm sorry. I wish that I was with you two now, but don't tell momma that. You know that would really upset her."

Behind Shepard stood Captain August Roux who had been looking for her since she had completed her part of the air show. She was about to harass the young girl about having her boyfriend take her place when she saw Shepard's tears and the resemblance to the image. _The same lips_, August thought. _The same smile. _She stepped a little closer and saw the name Shepard next to the face and looked at the sign Mindoir '70. _Oh, my God … you were there_.

Shepard heard the man behind the counter call out, "Captain! Great show! You come in here to remember the lost? Were you there?" August shook her head no, not wanting Shepard to know that she was there in the booth with her. The man motioned her over as Shepard continued to look at the image of her father. "I was one of the eight miners left alive in a tunnel. Scary times and to be honest we all thought we were gonna die." August walked a little closer to him as she saw that Shepard hadn't looked over or seen her. In trying to keep her presence quiet she walked behind a stand of 'Mindoir '70 … Never Forget!' caps to conceal her. The man pointed to the oversize picture that hung behind him, "Main street in Highland Falls ... it was an absolutely beautiful place that us miners weren't suppose to go to … but shortly after me and my cousin arrived on the planet … hell, like two young bucks we headed there." The man began to laugh as his mind went back to those times. "Our first and only time ever in town. It showed us just how tough those women of Mindoir were … hell, even the young girls. We were strolling towards the grocery store and we saw a woman … She was a much older woman but beautiful. The most beautiful woman that I have ever seen in my life … Well, we didn't have manners or sense then so we started doing what ignorant young men do." Then the man began to really laugh, "As we were showing our ass … a young girl of about 13 or 14 came out of nowhere and bam! A big can hit me on the head." As the man began to laugh even harder, Shepard turned to look at him. As he slowly got control of himself, he looked at August, who was not visible to Shepard, and said "God, I'd hate to see that kid today …" at those words his smile faded at what he had just said, "No. I wish for anything that kid was in front of me now."

Shepard stepped closer, looking at the man behind the counter. He looked older than the six years that had passed since their run-in. She saw the scar on his forehead as well as the slight tremor in his head and hands. "As long as she doesn't have a can of peaches you should be fine." Shepard said to him with a smile.

The man looked over at Shepard, "Ya! A can of peach-" He stopped, looked at her and then took a step back. "My god, you look just like Pastor Hannah Shepard!"

Shepard smiled at the sound of her mother's name and stepped forward, "The Pastor was my mother."

The man came around the counter and grabbed Shepard up in his arms, hugging her and laughing. "I'll be a … come here! I have thought about you for years ... I was so glad to hear that you made it out." The hug was tight and Shepard would have pulled away but she felt his emotion, his vulnerability in the embrace and so she hugged him back. "You had one fine woman for a mother." He said as he slowly let her go. "She asked the Sheriff not to tell our boss … she knew that we would have been fired and this was our last chance really. I'd screwed up on this here planet so bad that Mindoir was my last chance to not end up in prison … or dead. Pastor Shepard really worked with me, taught me how to not always focus on myself and it's because of her that I shaped up … well, sorta. I still need work but she put me on the right path. Good woman."

Shepard looked at him and smiled, "Yes … momma was a good woman. I didn't realize that she went down into the mining town."

"The Pastor? Yes." He said. "Right after that incident in fact. Your momma found out that we didn't have a church in Moorland … no spiritual guidance really and so she started coming down every Tuesday eve and she would hold services in one of the cafeterias there at Nokeic Central. By the time she passed away there were about four hundred of us attending … even a few upper management suits. I heard that some people weren't happy that she was coming down, threatened to have her church taken away … but your momma wasn't the type to let talk or threats stop her from what she thought was right. Hell, she even spent time with the whores. That woman was a saint … an angel if you ask me."

Shepard had always wondered where her mother had started going to on Tuesdays after choir practice instead of coming home to play cards with her dad, Aunt B and Lisa. Then she thought of her mother with the whores and she just couldn't see it. Not that she thought her mother would have looked down on them or considered them not worth her time. It was just that she couldn't see her mother … Hannah Shepard … in a brothel and … well, she just couldn't see it. "Momma in the brothels? With the whores?"

"With her Bible, yes ma'am," He said. "She would spend time wherever she was welcomed and let me tell you, that woman showed me, showed all of us in that community what true acceptance was. The day of her funeral almost everyone in the mining community came together at the local gym and held our own memorial. We would have come to town but … well, a lot of folks in town didn't want us there. I can't say I don't blame them though ... we could be wild. That and the whores didn't want to cause any problems for you and your dad ... or put a mark against the Pastor's memory. Those women loved your mother and would have done anything to protect her."

Shepard thought of her mother's funeral and what would have happened if they had showed up. He was right that it would have created quite a stir. "That might have been a little awkward." She said as she looked back at where her father's image had been. It was gone now as a person was running through the list on the pad. There was so much that she didn't know about her mother's life and Shepard was just starting to realize it. Her mother was always leaving the house on some mission and if Shepard asked where she was going her mother would always smile, "About the Lord's business." If Shepard asked if she could tag along Hannah always had something else she needed her to do … from piano lessons to weeding the garden. Shepard looked back at the miner, "Well, I better go."

As Shepard turned to leave, August moved farther out of sight behind the rack of hats almost knocking them and herself over. The man reached out and grabbed Shepard by the arm, "I don't know why you and I were saved, but it was for a reason … right?"

Shepard turned to face him, looking into his eyes that showed a lack of rest, a lack of peace. "Momma would have said that we were spared for a reason. Yes."

"That's why I started this little memory tent," he said as he pointed to the pads, "That took quite some time, money and push to get that but I wanted to … to … to not let their names, faces, lives just go to dust. This isn't much but I thought it might help."

The man was breathing a little harder, as if he had just ran a sprint. Shepard put her arm on his shoulder, "It's a nice thing for those lost on Mindoir to be remembered. You have done a really good thing here."

"I would have joined the Alliance," He said as tears started to form in his eyes. "I would have gone searching for the others that were taken. I have their names on the pad behind my counter if you want to look. Those that were declared missing. I would have searched the four corners until I brought every last one of them home … Home where they belong. Do you want to see the list?"

Shepard shook her head no. "I have to get back to my friends, but thanks! And God bless you for what you are doing. My mother would have approved of this." Shepard really didn't know what her mother would have thought of this but she could see that her words made him feel better, of that her mother would have approved of. "I'm sorry ... but what is your name?"

He wiped his eyes, "My name isn't important really."

Shepard looked him in the eyes, "Please, I'm Shepard."

He gave a little smile, "No kid ... you're Peaches." They both grinned at that. "I'm Tavio."

"It's nice meeting you this time, Tavio."

"Thanks!" He chuckled. Then his eyes grayed over again as he half whispered, "I just wish that I could do more. Failed the Alliance physical … tremors, mentally not strong enough either … it seems that I am falling apart. But hopefully this will make at least a small difference."

As Shepard walked away from the booth she called back, "Good to see you Captain August Roux. You might want to buy one of those caps you are cozying up to."

The crowd was pretty thick as she made her way towards Manny and she couldn't help but feel as if something was not quite right. It had been in the back of her mind since she had scrolled through the pad but she had just put it down to the memories of the past … seeing her father again. Talking with the miner about her mother had not hurt like she would have thought. In fact, it felt nice in some odd way to talk of her with this semi-stranger. _It felt like she was almost alive again_, Shepard thought. Just as she saw Manny coming towards her she stopped. He was holding up a stuffed Pepe Le Pew and grinning from ear to ear. "The king ring toss man of all Texas!" He was shouting.

"Ricky!" Shepard almost yelled. As she went running back to the Mindoir '70 booth, her mind racing through the list, she almost knocked down August who had been following her. "Excuse me Captain," she said as she went around her. "I didn't see his name … I saw his mother's and his sister's ... but not his." She said out loud to no one in particular.

As she returned to the booth and pushed a man out of her way to scroll to the P's she heard Tavio tell him, "I wouldn't get in Peaches way." Her memory had not failed her, Ricky was not there. She looked at the pad of missing and quickly walked towards it, jumping over the counter as if walking around would take too long. As she waved her hand over it and names flickered on, Shepard held her breath. She quickly scrolled through A-O and only slowed down once she hit the P's … and there he was Richard L. Parks. She touched his name and his image popped up along with Richard Lincoln Parks (DOB: 2/12/2154) Sophomore at Roald Amundsen High School - B***

Shepard felt her stomach turn and without looking away from her best friend choked out, "The missing … what do they think …" Shepard's voice trailed away from her as tears began to beat against her.

"More than likely, batarians took them … if you see a B and an asterisk then it means that an Alliance soldier witnessed his capture."

"If there are three asterisks?" Shepard asked.

"Three?" The miner looked at the image, "Then there were three separate witnesses to him being captured and carted away."

Shepard ran to the backside of the booth and threw up as she remembered seeing the colonists' skin peeled back as a chip was drilled into their head. The screams, _did he scream like that?_ Shepard retched again as she heard Manny calling her name. As she waved Manny away from her she felt someone steady her by her waist. "Just breathe Shepard," the Captain said softly. "take nice long breathes … don't worry, I have you." Shepard wanted to tell August to let her go but she also knew that she would collapse to the ground if she did.

"Manny," Shepard said as her stomach started to calm, "take me home."

* * *

Shepard woke up with Manny next to her on his stomach, fast asleep and sprawled out on her bed. His left arm was over her stomach and his leg was under her legs as usual. She looked over at the back of his head, kissed his shoulder and then quietly slid out of bed. She put on her robe and walked out to the backyard, where she listened to the crickets and locusts. The sky was clear and Shepard looked up into the heavens as she remembered the miners words, "I don't know why you and I were saved, but it was for a reason … right?" Shepard sat down on the bench as she heard him say, "I would have joined the Alliance. I would have gone searching for the others that were taken." _I would have searched the four corners until I brought every last one of them home … Home where they belong._ She repeated his words as she looked out into the night sky._ Are you still alive, Ricky? Are you out there waiting for me? I didn't know, if I had … I would, I would have … What Shepard? Joined the Alliance? _As soon as the question was asked she knew what she needed to do. Yes. She would join the Alliance … if they would have her. She would someday locate him, Ricky, and he could go to Illium and marry his asari girlfriend … or she would kill every batarian raider she could get her hands on. _I know momma … vengeance is mine sayeth the Lord. But I've got to try and find him and that may require me to ... _She thought of her father's last moments_ … I'm so sorry daddy. _Shepard felt confused, but as she looked up into the night sky she sent out a message ... _Ricky, if you are still alive … I promise that I will find you. Just please hang on!_

Two months later, Shepard was at the Texan Megapolis International Airport with a ticket to the Recruit Training Depot in Macapá, Brazil. Shepard had said goodbye to Teddy at the house where he cried like an old Jewish mother, telling her that if she got killed "I will never … and I mean this … I will NEVER talk to you again! Ever!" This made both Shepard and Manny laugh at him and he threw up his hands in disgust and walked out. Teddy hated goodbyes and Shepard knew that this was his way out.

On the way to the airport there was silence in the car. When Shepard had told Manny that she was joining the Alliance he became angry and told her that she could not do it ... he forbid it. She told him to go screw himself and then he yelled back that he did not want her going away, "I want to marry you!" he had shouted as he stormed out, breaking the door. Two days later he had come to her work with flowers and candy … "I'm sorry," He had said to her. "I just don't want to lose you … to lose us. You don't understand how dangerous it is out there. It is my job to keep you safe and I can't do it if you are thousands of miles away."

Shepard had promised him that she would be safe, that he could still protect her when they were together but that she had to do this. He had asked why but Shepard was still not ready to tell him all about her past. After the situation at the fair he knew that she had ties to Mindoir, but she wouldn't talk about where she came from.

Now at the airport, Manny hugged Shepard tight and made her promise that she would write. "Send me pictures and please write me."

Shepard laughed, "Okay … I can see you wanting pictures of me in uniform … But you hate to read, why on Earth would you want me to write?"

"Because it means that you will be doing something that keeps you from talking or looking at the Alliance soldiers … I can't have you leaving me for a man in uniform."

Shepard punched him in the arm and then gave him a hug. "I'll write, I don't think that I'll be doing much of anything else on my downtime."

Manny pulled her close, "Sure, it will be a cakewalk for you … nothing but lying on the beach, a little salutin' and good food."

* * *

Seventy-two hours later and Cadet Shepard was face down in mud with Drill Instructor Gunnery Chief Ellison standing over her yelling, "What, are you goldbrickin' Cadet Shepard? Get your ass in gear!"

Her body was aching, her heart was pounding, her feet were hurting, but Shepard was in heaven.


	34. Red Route Giggles

Her legs were aching, her heart was pounding, her hands were hurting, but Liara was in heaven. "Relax," she whispered as she softened her grip. It was important that she remained as relaxed as she could ... she focused on her back and shoulders, making sure that she wasn't putting to much tension there as it would make the fluidity and smoothness in her movements suffer. She had just spent the last three hours scaling the most challenging section of the climbing wall at the Serrice Fitness Center known as the red route. She needed to accomplish this difficult climb as per her agreement with her mother, as well as push her body to the limits in preparation of her next dig. And now with the final two moves she had done something that she would never have believed. She had successfully climbed the red route ... and without the use of her biotics!

* * *

Liara had accepted an offer to participate in a trip to Kur'deshia, a salarian planet with a low population focused on mining that had just uncovered prothean artifacts during a push deep into a mountain. The area had been secured by the salarian government and Dr. Titum Ronak, a well-respected salarian who was also considered one of the top prothean experts, was given approval to excavate and research the area exclusively. The expedition called "Kd 73-1" would require a team of twenty-four and Liara had been contacted by the Doctor's assistant on participating. Liara admired Dr. Titum Ronak and quickly accepted before realizing that she had not gotten approval from the Guildhall, Elibio Academy or more importantly her mother.

Liara as a master researcher was averaging sixteen hour work days at the Guildhall now, excluding her two days when she attended Eli. On those days, Liara would get to work early so she could cram in eight hours and then race to an eight to ten hour training day at the Academy. She loved the challenge of her job which at this moment saw her deciphering the codes in the documents N555k9. They had been discovered over four centuries past, purchased by the Guildhall and then left in storage. She would lay these out on her study table in her office and then lose herself in them and their mystery. She had on many occasions fallen asleep on her office couch and if she did not return home within a few days, the Matriarch would send someone to check up on her. She loved that her office was located on the archived floor which was just above the basement and saw very few people venturing to this level. Traffic was low due to the very strict and limited access allowed to the main section of the floor which housed the rare documents, artifacts and art while only three offices were on this level; Matriarch Eyto, Dr. Trasina and Dr. T'Soni. All three were involved in very solitary studies that on occasion crisscrossed each other's focus. Liara loved the Matriarch Eyto's quick grasp of problems and even quicker ability to give multiple solutions to a problem. Dr. Trasina was a little harder to get to know as she was very private about her life and unlike other asari did not like to be touched, at all. Liara found a connection with her at the game of chess and she would go into Dr. Trasina's outer office and move a white piece on the board and then leave. Every first work day of the week she did this and they were now in their thirteenth match without ever uttering more than twelve words to each other.

The Guildhall and Academy both gave their approvals for a six-month hiatus for Dr. T'Soni. The Guildhall saw it as an opportunity to acquire additional knowledge and potentially items from the site; while Liara's strong biotic abilities were moving her quickly through the training now that she had passed her non-biotic classes. But the Matriarch was not as ready to see Liara leave her wall of protection.

"Liara, it is too soon for you to leave the Elibio Academy," Benezia had said. "You are not even half-way through your training."

Liara's stomach turned as she worried that Benezia would not be persuaded, "Mother, this is an important discovery. And the head of the project is Dr. Ronak … Dr. Titum Ronak, mother. He has seen places as well as touched artifacts that I have not seen or even heard of … just think of what he could tell me or teach me. The secrets that he has uncovered and I could see how he deciphers things so much quicker … why, quicker than even I can."

Benezia could see the old spark in her daughter's eyes, that beautiful inquisitive spark that had been gone since she returned home from Aethoyner_. No, you must not let this sway you_, Benezia thought as she looked at her daughter. _You must protect her; she cannot leave Thessia alone, not yet_. Benezia was scheduled to attend a Matriarch Pact on Lessus for the next three months and had instructed her acolytes to return to the place of their birth for meditation and reflection. "No Liara. I cannot give my approval this time as my resources are not available to spare."

Liara could feel the tears as she looked away from her mother, "I understand mother, forgive me for taking your time in this matter."

Benezia continued to look at her daughter as a tear rolled down the young asari's cheek and Benezia sighed, "You must promise me to be careful and-."

Liara caught her breath, looked over at her mother who was rising from her chair and cut her off in her excitement, "Oh, mother!" _Why can you be so weak with her at times? _Benezia thought as Liara jumped up and hugged her. "I promise that I will be careful! I will even work out at the fitness center to make sure that I have all strengths ready … both physical and biotics!"

Benezia grabbed Liara by the chin, "I was not finished, my heart …You must also hone your technique in your climbing. You get a little careless at times and this is unacceptable!"

Liara looked up into her mother's eyes, "Have you seen me climb?"

"More times than you know," Benezia smiled as she thought of the time Liara hung from a terrace. "Just last week I watched you climb the mid-level wall at the fitness center. You relied on your biotics. Unacceptable. You must be able to climb the wall without the use of them and climb the hardest section … the red route."

The red route was intimidating to even the most experience climbers and only two climbers, medalists at that, had done it without the use of biotics, "The red route?" Liara said in a religious tone.

"The red route." Benezia repeated without a hint of humor.

"But mother … why can't I use my biotics? Only a few very experienced climbers have ever climbed the red route using their biotics and only two without the use of them. Climbers that are so much more gifted than I. Mother, I just can't … I can't even with my biotics."

Benezia looked deep into her young daughter's eyes, "You will never say _I can't _again … and you are much more gifted than you give yourself credit for. Now, before this trip you will climb the red route without biotics. Do you understand?"

"No biotics?" Liara almost whispered. As Liara saw her mother head to the door, she asked, "But why, mother?"

Benezia stopped, turned and smiled softly as she said, "Because Liara … my Little Wing, when you panic it seems that you forget that option."

Liara looked at her mother confused and then remembered times past that she had indeed forgotten her biotic abilities and smiled. "The red route … no biotics. I promise."

* * *

After exhausting all her energy in the climb, she was now being slowly dropped back to the ground by her belayer, who was congratulating her on doing something very few had done. As her feet touched the ground she saw Shiala appear with an unknown asari.

Shiala saw Liara being freed by the belayer and greeted her with a smile and a yell, "Little!"

Liara smiled over at her and waved as she got herself free from the rigging.

Shiala looked at her companion smiling even bigger, said something that Liara couldn't hear and then half-jogged to her, "What are you doing here this late?"

"I needed to get a good climb in before I forgot how," Liara answered as she motioned toward the red route wall. "What are you doing in Serrice? I thought you were with mother?"

"You climbed that part of the wall?" Shiala asked impressed and avoiding the question.

"Yes," Liara answered with just a hint of pride. "First time … I thought I wouldn't make it. But mother required me to climb it and without my biotics before I could leave on my trip."

Shiala looked closer at the course and around it, "And no one got hurt? Nothing came off?"

Liara giggled and punched Shiala on the arm, "No!"

Shiala laughed and then pulled her friend closer, "Liara, please meet Dlasta."

The two asari smiled at each other as Shiala looked back at the wall, "I didn't break anything." Liara almost pouted.

Shiala laughed again, "No Little, I was just wondering if I could climb to the summit without the use of my biotics … you did say that you climbed it on physical strength alone, correct?"

"Of course," Liara answered as Dlasta looked over at Shiala. "The red route was harder than I thought."

"You aren't thinking of …" Dlasta was cut off as Shiala went over to the belayer.

* * *

Two hours later the three were having kaffee at the all-night eatery _Prandiem_. This was Liara's favorite eatery since her early years at the Serrice University ... her and Sibila would come here and split a meal as they did their studies. It was also the first place that her cousin had shared pleasures with someone ... How that had embarrassed her. Sibila with the waitress in the back as she tried studying despite the noise and the other patrons laughing. But despite that memory she still loved the place with its maroon seats and beautiful view of the temple all lit up.

Now sitting here with Shiala and Dlasta she couldn't help but smile. She could tell that Shiala liked Dlasta and it made her glad ... Shiala was like an older sister to her and she knew that it was almost time for her to move into the matron stage if she hadn't already. She had wanted to ask her if she had and what it was like but there were so many things of late that had kept them from talking. That had kept them apart really. It didn't help that Liara was spending almost all of her time in Serrice ... residing at the Politia Villa instead of the Consilium Estate.

"Next time," Shiala interrupted her thoughts. "I can't believe that I got stuck just a quarter up … not even halfway."

"You did much better than I would have," Dlasta placated as she got up and excused herself to the washroom. "I won't be long."

"Oh, Shiala … you did wonderfully!" Liara smiled. "After all, I always seem to not use my biotics while you, well … in reality you made it much farther than me."

Shiala looked at Liara and smiled, "Thanks Little, but you have always had a stronger drive then anyone I've known … well, besides the Matriarch."

"Speaking of the Matriarch," Liara leaned into the table, getting closer to Shiala, "What is the Matriarch planning?"

Shiala shifted in her seat, "Planning?"

Liara tilted her head slightly, "Don't act as if you don't know what I am talking about. Mother is up to something ... even not being home that much when I am there are late night meetings in her private reading room, couriers coming and going, conversations that suddenly stop when I enter the room, the worry that I see on her face as she sleeps … just to name a few things."

"Liara," Shiala scolded. "No one is allowed to enter into the Matriarch's room uninvited! No one ... and especially when she is sleeping."

Liara put her hand on her own chin, "Please, I have been crawling into my mother's bed since I can remember ... Mother has never forbidden me."

"That is not wise!" Shiala said with shock on her face. "What if she is having pleasures with Ky... I mean. You shouldn't do that."

Liara had known that her mother was sharing her pleasures with Kyriake and was glad. Kyri had always been kind to her and had shown her how to tear down and put back together timepieces ... When she was smaller she had always hoped that Kyri was her mother's choice in mating ... but she now knew that it wasn't her. She had hoped and even pretended as a child but in the end it had been just a wish. "Shiala, I know about Kyri and mother ... Now, do you know what she is planning?"

Shiala looked at Liara with a solemn face, "Little, it would please me greatly to confide what I know ... but the Matriarch has sworn me to silence on her current activities. Please do not turn away from me because of it."

Liara understood that Shiala could not, nor should she, break the Matriarch's orders. Liara would just have to wait to see what her mother as a Matriarch was doing. "Can you at least tell me if you will be with her? Kyriake? If she will have protection?"

Shiala frowned, "That I do not know."

Liara joined in with the frown, "Promise me that you will be there to … to-"

"Little," Shiala whispered as she took Liara's hand, "You know that no one can tell the Matriarch what to do. But I have faith in her … no one has her wisdom or strength of mind. Wherever she goes, I will follow unless she forbids it."

Liara squeezed Shiala's hand, "I'm sorry. I should trust the Matriarch as you do. I just sometimes see her just as my mother and I feel apprehension."

Shiala laughed, "Were she my mother I would feel the same as you."

"So who is this Dlasta?" Liara asked, trying to brighten the moment.

Shiala smiled, "She is my neighbor downstairs at my new apartment. We have been getting to know each other and, well … do you like her?"

"I thought that you were seeing Dr. Trasina?" Liara asked.

"I wanted to but she would always push me away." Shiala answered as she looked at her hands. She had fallen for Doctor Bryn Trasina from the moment that she saw her while visiting Liara. She could tell that the feeling was mutual and she started to come by everyday on the pretense that she was visiting Liara. They began to talk and their joint love of agriculture gave them a subject to discuss for hours. But whenever Shiala would go to touch Trasina she would pull away as their touching became too heated. The last time that they were together at Shiala's it was Trasina that had started touching her first and the kissing, Shiala's favorite thing to do, was deeper and harder then it had even better. As Shiala felt Trasina reach down her backside she had started to open her mind to her and that was end their relationship ended. Trasini moved quickly away from her and left without another word. Since then she had not returned any of Shiala's calls and had sent her a message saying that she could not see her again. "She is very private and whenever I would touch her it seemed that I had hurt her." There was a small silence, a soft sigh and then Shiala looked at Liara, "So? Dlasta? What do you think of her?"

"She seems nice and very attractive, something I think that you've already noticed." Liara teased.

Shiala gave a slight laugh as Dlasta returned to the table. Shiala moving the conversation away from Dlasta asked Liara, "So why did the Matriarch put you on the red route?"

"Mother doesn't want me to lose my stamina, strength, determination, focus or technique in lead climbing." Liara answered, mimicking her mother.

Shiala fought back her laughter as she motioned her head towards Dlasta and slapped Liara's wrist, "It is wrong to mimic the Matriarch, Little."

Liara's giggle faded as she became solemn. All three knew that Liara's mimic was done without malice but custom did not approve of a Matriarch being ridiculed, mimicked or made fun of. Liara had overstepped her social boundaries and while Shiala was a confidante of Liara's, Dlasta was a stranger. Liara needed to show the individual that she was contrite and in no way meant disrespect to the Matriarch. Being Benezia's daughter did not give her license to ignore the customs but put a greater weight to follow them to the letter. She then turned to Dlasta, "Please forgive my inappropriate behavior. The Matriarch has my undying loyalty and respect … I am neither as worthy in life or as wise as the Matriarch, but just a humble servant to her. "

"Of course," Dlasta responded.

"I think climbing the red route has made you a little too full of yourself," Shiala poked at Liara.

"Do you think that Mother will be proud?" Liara asked.

"Little, she is always proud of you." Shiala smiled as she touched Liara's cheek. "You must know that."

"Thank you, Shiala, your words are kind," Liara smiled back as she took her hand. "I just hope that it eases her mind at least a little." Liara looked over at Dlasta, "The Matriarch says that being physically unfit could be the difference between life and death on a dig site." Liara's smile faded as she looked at her cup and thought of a colleague who was just murdered by a group of 'relic robbers' in the Artemis Tau cluster. She had been sent to scout out the area for the '79 expedition planned. "And I know that the Matriarch is right."

"The Matriarch is always right," Shiala said as she began folding a napkin.


	35. Rainforest Letters

Dear Manny,

I found the napkin from the Buckhorn Saloon in my bag. You love me, huh? That was sweet and very romantic of you my gorgeous San Antonio Boy!

You know how you said this would be a walk in the park for me? It is! If by_ walk in the park _you really meant a _march through hell_! No lie. Six recruits snuck out overnight because they couldn't take it. Not sure where they thought that they were running to, though. We are surrounded by a rainforest here. Had they not been caught within the first twenty-four they would have probably died out there. But I can't really blame them. First thing that I have to tell you ... they cut off my hair to just short of my collar. No military does this anymore except the Alliance and quite a few of the girls were crying. I wanted to but I told myself that it will grow back. Then we were given these awful sweat suits that we had to wear until our uniforms were issued and can I tell you that wearing those let everyone know that we were at the bottom of the food chain. In the galley we were given looks that made me not want to go back there for dinner. I was so happy to get out of them four days later. That first day we had almost no sleep and if I told you how we slept only two hours with our seabags pushed against each other you probably won't believe it. Who thought of this shit? They had to be related to Marquis de Sade. And why did they give us seabags when we are not sailors or on a ship? I think they just meant to keep us really off-balance. And we were.

I cannot stress enough how the crazy started day one and continued on ... after day one of the floor huddle sleeping we thought a cot was great for our second day ... that's when we were awakened by air horns and trash cans being thrown into the center of our barracks. Both recruits on either side of me (Stuart and Edgar) screamed in unison killing my eardrums! And before you think something like I am sleeping between two guys – don't. Their names are Michelle Edgar and Rose Stuart. Edgar is from Earth (Tennessee) and Stuart is from Eden Prime. From day one we three hit it off and we have bonded more over our mutual disgust at another recruit, James Haite. The guy is an absolute arrogant prick that talks non-stop. Or should I say boasts non-stop. We aren't supposed to be talking most of the time and this egghead in our group won't shut up. I swear if I have to do one more pushup, sit-up or run because of him I'm going to either pull his tongue out or just kill him. He talks more than Teddy!

These past two weeks have been exhausting and sometimes it feels like all we do is march and get yelled at. I know there must be a reason for all this screaming, sleep deprivation and brutal physical training but dear Bacchus! I swear I'm going to haul off and punch that crazy Ellison! Then there is the having to shower commune-style. I want to shower alone! And the water is only lukewarm. No tomato colored skin when I am done. Teddy would be happy to know that. Marches & yelled at - you get the gist. You never know if you are coming or going and the whole time a crazy drill instructor is screaming at you. Oh, and it is lights out at 10:00PM every night ... at 9:55 we hear _Tattoo, tattoo lights out in five minutes_ over loud speakers. For some odd reason this makes Michelle laugh everytime! Then she shows off her tattoo on her shoulder. Her tattoo is an asari ... she first showed it to me at mealtime and I spit my milk everywhere. An asari! How do I end up around people with that fetish?

I really miss having my privacy. To shower alone would be heaven! And to have a plate of Teddy's barbeque chicken and potato salad - YUM. I was actually salivating as I wrote that. I miss you and the gang in San Antonio. Tell Teddy and Dale that I am thinking of them and to please write! We only have Sunday AM to use the terminals to write and with the amount of people waiting I don't have the time to write everyone so you will need to be my voice. Just two and a half more months to go and I will be over this part. Please write and mail it! I wish that they allowed us to get e-mail here but it would really tie up the terminals and there would be bloodshed as everyone fought over the use.

Kisses, Shepard

P.S. Re-read and dear Lord all I did was bitch about my time here. Sorry! Did I say that I miss you?

Sent: June 20, 2173 - Recruit Training Command (Macapá, Brazil)

* * *

Dear Senor Castillo,

Happy 4th and not el cuatro de julio! I was really excited to see your letter, until I opened it. I don't speak Spanish, remember? I also do not have the time to translate. My only free time is Sundays from 0700 to 1300 and between waiting in line to write, shining my boots, eating, reading mail, ironing my clothes, I don't have time to translate your letters! I'm almost tempted to write the rest of this letter in French. Est-ce que tu me comprends? Okay, I won't do that. Besides, not being able to understand your letter just gave me more time to study. It's funny how between the physical conditioning, marching, classroom training, marching, meals, marching, etc we are also required to study. That means that we are studying when we eat, shit, shower and really any time extra that we get. I'm really thankful for my memory now! Some guys & gals are really struggling with the classroom portion.

Did I tell you that after a few days that crazy Ellison made me a recruit chief petty officer because I had green eyes? Really? Among other things I am responsible for maintaining good order, discipline, and security within the division at all times. I just wanted to get through this without too many hassles. Well, that was the plan.

Update on the yapping egghead - he is treading a fine line. We had to run an extra mile just yesterday because he couldn't keep his trap closed. Stuart is really homesick, not that any of us aren't, but she is really missing her kid. The guy she was seeing dumped her when he found out that she was pregnant and so she is the sole support and had to leave her infant daughter with her parents while she is here. It's sad. I don't know how I would cope if I were her. A baby. But with her extreme homesickness she also has a stronger drive to succeed than a lot of us. She is also really smart at technical crap. She also showed Edgar & I how to pick a lock. She can break into anything and fix anything. She is hoping to become an Aviation Electronics Technician when all is said and done. Well, actually she says that one day she would love to be an air traffic controller at a base somewhere so she can have her daughter with her. I hope that she gets what she wants. She is a really nice person.

Edgar is physically amazing especially when it comes to hand-to-hand combat. She was a cage boxer before she enlisted and she can take down an opponent quick with her powerful uppercut. I swear that her opponents never see it coming. The girl is quick! On top of being physically strong she also has a really great sense of humor. She joined after she broke up with her girlfriend and it's funny how no matter if you are gay or straight your heart gets broken just the same. We joke with her that some people get drunk after a break up and she went to hell instead.

I hate marching! I hate being yelled at! Sorry for the quick vent but I can't show how frustrated I am with all of this madness. Read and then quickly delete these moments of weakness!

I miss your smile and arms. One more vent. You know how much I love rain? Not so much now. That's all it's been doing here and with my face in the mud, Gunnery Chief Ellison's boot up my ass and sweat pouring off me, well I want to come home. Okay, it's not all bad. I've met some really nice guys and gals here. Some of the guys have bigger arms then you and bigger – oops! Just teasing! Did I say that I miss you? Tell Teddy and Dale thanks for their letters, in beautiful English.

Kisses, Shepard

P.S. I can't stop laughing. I just re-read what I wrote and I AM RAMBLING! Now you see what this crazy place is doing to me. Miss you! Just two months to go.

Sent: July 4, 2173 - Recruit Training Command (Macapá, Brazil)

* * *

Dear Manny,

Marry you? What happened to the guy that said he didn't want to ever get married? That sexy, easy-going, live each day and not think about tomorrow? Remember the last time that you asked? Wouldn't you rather us live in sin? Probably not even that if you saw me now ... I'm here getting rained on in July, hair like a boys, no make-up, very unsexy clothes ... trust me, you not only would not want to marry me but also touch me. Desirable is not a word that I would use to describe me at the moment.

Speaking of attractive, I almost called it quits here this last week when I was at my most awful looking. It was just after spending time in the Confidence Chamber (a gas chamber). Don't ask. While I rattled off my name, rank and Alliance number over and over until the DI tapped me to leave, it brought back some really bad memories with the smoke, the sound of people panicking, the choking and others tossing their cookies. Outside as my lungs began to clear and my eyes stopped hurting I just wanted to say that I was done. Finito. And then I could hear my mom say, "Elizabeth, you do not quit. If you committed to this then you must see it through to the end. Do you hear me?" The funny part is that my mother would have been the last person to ever want to see me in the Alliance. My dad would have been worried but my mom would have forbid it. Yet these past weeks I have been thinking a lot about her. Strange.

Haite started to panic in the gas chamber and was about to bolt when I talked him down from his panic. We hadn't even removed our masks and he was freaking out. I really surprised myself when I helped him to be honest. I was also starting to get nervous when he began to fidget and despite me not liking the creep I couldn't see any of us failing. After we were outside he was really grateful, telling everyone what I did for him and I think I saw Ellison smile at me right before he shut Haite up with "Is she your mommy? Should we put you in a diaper and have her burp your fuckin' wet ass?" I think I am starting to understand the Chief. Maybe. Not really.

Tell Teddy that the letter from Margarita La Cha Cha was funny, especially the garter that he included. Ellison had me put it on and walk around saying "Hey sailor, wanna dance?" for twenty minutes while the rest of my group had to do pushups, sit ups and run. I owe him!

I am missing you so much. Wish that I could sneak you in here for a night. A long month and a half to go before this part is over and I can touch you.

Shepard

P.S. Side note to the gas chamber moment, you really would have dumped me on the spot had you seen me there all bent over with more snot than I thought was even in my head running down my face.

Sent: July 18, 2173 - Recruit Training Command (Macapá, Brazil)

* * *

Stop Manny!

I know that you want to make an honest woman out of me but let's wait until after I have settled in to the Alliance. I hear that the first couple of years in the Alliance are really demanding and I don't think that marriage would be sensible since both of us have full plates right now. You have your business to focus on, congrats on opening the new shop in Austin. Now with two garages and your towing company it's probably good that I am focused elsewhere. Once you are the wealthiest man in San Antonio, no make that the whole of the Texan Megapolis then we can talk about marriage.

It's true that I've never talked about my mother or father with you. It's hard talking about them. They both passed away years ago and I just thought it was better to move on. To satisfy a little of your curiosity and questions, my father's name was Pierce and he was a manager of a place that did electrical and plumbing, my mother's name was Hannah and she was a pastor of a church and both my parents were musicians. Growing up I can always remember them playing music together in our living room. Yes, I do look like my mother but I have my dad's lips. Yes, the lips that you say are sexy belong to my dad! But before you freak, he got them from his mother, my grandmother. Wait, that isn't any better is it. Oh, well. That's enough about my parents.

This past week we spent a lot of time on the rifle range and focusing on our weapons. I actually enjoyed it to be honest. Of course knucklehead Haite, did I mention that this lunatic is Welsh? Anyway, he started saying that the targets were too close and that he could outshoot all of us. Dear Bacchus! So Gunnery Chief Ellison took him up on that and had targets moved farther away. All those years practicing with my Aunt B, who was a Sheriff, really came back and even after they moved the targets farther away they were still close for me but I wasn't gonna draw attention to myself. When it was my turn I had every intention to miss the mark but I couldn't stop thinking that my Aunt B was looking at me. By the time we were through I had beaten all the guys at 1,000 meters. Two days later I was pulled out of a class by Ellison and taken back to the range where they had me at 1250 – 1500 – 1750 – 2000 meter marks. I screwed up on the 2,000 mark because a group of officers showed up. I heard the words scout sniper and I got too deep into my own head which destroyed my concentration. Or maybe it was the shift in the wind. Or a combination of both. Who knows.

I'm glad that your new shop is doing well. Loved the pictures of the grand opening but why were there so many half-naked girls? Advertisement purposes? You really think that I am buying that? Just remember that if you dump me for someone it can only be either Teddy or Marge!

Kisses, Shepard

P.S. I miss you and the gang!

Sent: August 1, 2173 - Recruit Training Command (Macapá, Brazil)

* * *

Dear Manny,

I would love to send you a naughty girl-in-uniform picture but I am not about to risk getting caught doing that. You will just have to use your imagination my little Texas boy! I will say that after all this time my body is really getting in shape and that the communal showers are starting to heat up. Okay that second part was a lie. Two more guys disappeared this last week and even though we all understand being homesick and really tired – none of us can understand going UA when we are so close to graduating. I was hoping that Haite was one of them but no such luck. His big fat mouth was back on flap duty the very next day. Not really, I was glad that he was still here. He isn't really that bad of a guy if he could just be quiet now and again.

I hate to cut this letter short but I am writing a letter to my grandmother in Tybee Island, Georgia. I haven't spoken to her in fifteen months so this may not end well. Fingers crossed.

Shepard

P.S. Miss you.

Sent: August 15, 2173 - Recruit Training Command (Macapá, Brazil)

* * *

Dear Grandma,

I hope that this e-mail finds you, grandpa and the family doing well. Over the past fifteen months there were many times that I wanted to reach out and talk to you but something always stopped me. Actually, it was more like three years. After losing mom and dad I really needed someone to reach out to and knew that it should be you but the memories were just too much. I knew that no one could really fix this pain and staying away seemed the best for everyone. Or at least that is what I believed then. That it was just better to forget and move on instead of hurt everytime the memory of mom, dad, Aunt B, Ricky, Tyler, Uncle Stu, so many more.

But these past couple months have seen me thinking about mom and dad without the ache that was there in the past. I'm not sure what has changed or why thinking about them has gotten easier but it has. I saw a holo of dad not long ago and it reminded me of how much I was blessed. How lucky I was to have him and mom in my life, the community that I grew up in and my family there on Tybee Island. His smile made me realize too that I had failed his and mom's memories by running away. Words can never express how truly sorry and ashamed of my weak action after graduation last year when I ran away. I am so sorry. Hopefully one day I can make it up to everyone there on Tybee.

In trying to get back on course, I joined the Alliance and will be heading out into the stars as a Naval Aircrewman soon. At least that is my very unromantic goal. But for now, I will be graduating in two weeks and the ceremony is being held at the fortress of São José de Macapá here in Macapá, Brazil and they say that we can have family come. So if you would like to ... I have attached the info to this e-mail. It's okay if you can't or won't make it. I will understand. After my walking away from the family it would be understandable that you and grandpa don't want to see me again. Just know that I love you and that I am sorry that I hurt you.

Honest - I won't blame you if you don't write back but I wanted you to know that I am okay. Okay and missing the family terribly.

Elizabeth W. Shepard

P.S. I really do love you grandma!

Sent: August 15, 2173 - Recruit Training Command (Macapá, Brazil)

* * *

Dear Manny,

One week from now and I will be graduating. It feels like a lifetime since we were together and it will be really nice to have you here. You can see where I have spent the last few months, meet all the crazy people and you are even going to meet my grandparents, Aunts, Uncle and cousins. It seems that the Shepards are coming out in full force. My grandmother was excited that I had written and not a harsh word was written back to me. I was really worried that she and the family had written me off. It would have served me right. But they didn't and you will be meeting them. Dress nice!

Gunnery Chief Ellison is really not all that bad. He really wants all of us to be ready for whatever comes our way in the future. I never thought that I would say or write this, but I actually like the crazy guy. I would say that I am going to miss him but that would be a lie. Sorta. A part of me will miss this place, these people.

I have a lot to do today so I need to cut this letter short.

See you soon!

Shepard

P.S. When I said that I think I am starting to like the Chief, it doesn't mean I trust him. I have a feeling that he has one final surprise before we are released from this insane asylum. No, I don't trust the guy.

Sent: August 22, 2173 - Recruit Training Command (Macapá, Brazil)


	36. Water & Mud

"You can't trust him," Tatiaria said as she walked with her sister arm-in-arm through the four-mile square park Cerelia Meadows in the heart of Armali. Benezia had just informed her sister that she was going to be leaving Thessia to an undisclosed location where she was to meet the Spectre, Saren Arterius. When Benezia added that she was going alone and not taking any of her acolytes or commandos, her sister stopped in her tracks. "Sister, he is too dangerous to go alone. You must have some kind of security with you ... not only because of him but you will be off Thessia."

"I have no choice," Benezia answered, as she left her sister's side and walked over to the grand memorial to their ancestor, Cerelia T'Soni. This was the original memorial erected and twice the size of its copy in Serrice ... "He will only talk to me in person and not here on Thessia. It appears that neither of us is too trusting."

"Sister, must you meet with him? Can't you use an alternative resource or connection to pull back the veil on him?" Tatiaria asked as she joined Benezia at the memorial. "Surely someone knows what he is doing? What his plans are?"

Benezia dipped her hand in the water, causing the image of her ancestor to stretch and distort into a silent scream, "It would appear that he has found and fallen into a black hole, sister. A black hole that only by his invitation will I gain access to peer into."

"Well then leave him in that hole." Tatiaria bitterly responded as she moved her sister's hand in the water so that their ancestor returned to her mourning.

Benezia turned slightly to look at her sister, "Do not be blind sister to a black hole that could swallow our own daughters. Or be deaf to a silence that could shatter our world."

Tatiaria put her hand in the water next to her sister's and their ancestor disappeared in a swirl of water. Tatiaria would have smiled at their ritual of changing the memorial's appearance if the subject matter had not been so serious. "How long have we done this?" She asked as she moved closer to Benezia.

"Since you were a child," Benezia smiled and gave her a small push with her hip. "You loved this memorial and playing in the water. Always asking me to tell you the story Cerelia and her love of the Myndourite Pastora ... or was that Myndoup?"

This made Tatiaria laugh at her mispronunciation of the word back then, "Myndo-up! If you are going to mock my childish mistakes please get it right!"

The sisters laughed and hugged ... then the Matriarch began writing letters in the water as Tatiaria looked off at the T'Soni Tower, "I had dinner with Liara the other night in Serrice. She made me your omelete and I was very impressed ... she was giggling like when she was small as she told me about the red route climb. She is a strong girl ... like a krogan."

Tatiaria looked at her sister who despite the small smile at her younger sister's tease looked deep in thought as she moved her finger around the cool liquid. "Like an asari."

"Isn't that what I said?" Tatiaria asked innocently.

Benezia looked over at her sister, "I saw her in Illium."

"Why?" Tatiaria had never liked Aethyta and her coarse ways ... In fact that could be said of almost everyone around the Matriarch. But she did see that Aethyta worshipped her sister and was protective of her. Where her failing lied was in the word _possessive_. Tatiaria witnessed it at a party once. Benezia was speaking privately on a terrace with two cousins and Aethyta had burst in on them asking why they just didn't pleasure each other right there. When Aethyta learned that they were the daughters of Cerelia like Benezia she had said that it was an honest mistake, "No one listens unless they desire the speaker." Tatiaria had asked her sister later how she could put up with that kind of behavior and insulting ways ... Benezia had laughed, "Aethyta comes from the perioikos asari ... give her time. She may not behave as we do but she has an honest heart."

Benezia looked at her younger sister, "I told mother to send you to Lusia and work on the plantation for at least a season ... you would have met more perioikos asari and had a better understanding of where Aethya came from. It would have done you good." Perioikos asari were what the working class was called and the asari that Benezia loved. That love started when she was sent to the plantation to work when she was young and she met those less fortunate working the fields. These asari were strong, severly honest and hearty laughers ... these were attributes not seen in her society and she loved it. She had wanted her younger sister to experience that world ... to live and work among those people ... but their mother thought that she was too delicate. Benezia disagreed but kept silent. But she knew that if she ever had a daughter ... she would experience this world and when she had sent Liara she held her breath. She was afraid that Liara would turn her nose up but instead she had rolled her sleeves up and wanted to stay longer. _Thank you Aethya_ she had secretly said.

"I don't think working on a plantation would have made me like her." Tatiaria frowned. "She was rude and very vulgar!"

That made Benezia laugh ... Yes, Aethya was vulgar but she was also gentle where needed. Benezia saw that the topic was upsetting her sister so she changed subjects, "You also loved it here."

"I loved it when you would pick me up for the day and bring me here for a mid-day meal," Tatiaria hugged her arm, "You were the most beautiful creature to me."

"Were?" Benezia arched a brow at her much sister.

"Always, sister." The two manipulated the images as they listened to the sounds in the park. Tatiaria wanted to tell her sister no, to forbid her from going but she was still a matron and much younger than the Matriarch. Carefully she said, "Sister, what if something should happen to you? What if this is a trap? What if he will not let you return? Your absence would leave me empty and-"

Benezia cut her off, "If something should happen to me then you would honor me with tears of loss and joy."

Tatiaria caught her breath at the thought of losing her older sister and felt her composure slipping, "Sister, please don't go. If not for me then think of your daughter, think of Liara. She is so young … too young to be without you. What would happen to her if you were not here anymore? Without you or your guidance? No. She is too young to be without you, sister."

Benezia lowered her head, closed her eyes, took a deep breath herself, "Liara-"her voice choked at the thought of her young daughter alone without her, "Liara will survive without me as long as she has you and your guidance."

"My guidance?" Tatiaria looked worried, "Please, sister ... Look at my daughter, how senseless she can be and then look at Liara." Both pulled their hands out of the water to face each other as their ancestor slowly returned to mourn and carry her lover. "I wouldn't know what to do with her. She requires deeper training than I am able to provide."

Benezia smiled, "You have done well with Sibila. I have full confidence in you that my daughter would be properly trained if left in your care."

"How can you be so sure?" Tatiaria frowned. "I would surely fail, sister."

Benezia placed her hand on her sister's cheek, "Do you not realize that you are the reason that she is here? It was watching you, seeing you with your daughter that made me start to want a daughter of my own. It was seeing how you and Sibila lit up, how you took care of her and the way you two seemed connected. It inspired me long after I had given up any real desire or hope to ever have a daughter of my own."

"Me?" Tatiaria was shocked since she had always looked up to her older sister and never thought that she could truly inspire the Matriarch. "I am both touched and honored, sister. I never knew …"

"Now you do," Benezia smiled as she removed her hand and gave a kiss to her cheek where her hand had been. "Tati, I need your support in this matter. I cannot hesitate or fail at what I need to do. I cannot stand by and let Saren stay on the path that he is currently on. His hatred of the humans has poisoned his very heart and, while I have no proof, the path that he is on may be the destruction of us all. No, I pray to the Goddess that I do not fail in my handling of him."

"I have never known you to fail." Tatiaria said, "You have always succeeded at anything and everything you do."

Benezia frowned looking at the dead lover being held by Cerelia in the memorial, "Not everything."

"Do not think of that," Tatiaria pulled her sister away from the memorial and turned Benezia to face her, "That was not your failure. It was hers."

Benezia looked past her sister, remembering a happier time with Aethya on Lusia, "Liara asked me about her."

Tatiaria stepped back, "And did you tell her?"

"No." Benezia answered, returning her gaze to her sister.

The two sisters stood in the quiet sounds of the park again for a few minutes as each collected her own private thoughts. "I know that you are wiser than I am, but to go alone! He could kill you. You must take commandos … anything. Not alone."

"Tati, I do not know what he is up to so I will not endanger anyone until I have accessed the situation first. That is why I need you to promise me that while I am away that you will stand in for me."

Tatiaria looked at Benezia, saw that her sister was not going to be persuaded to change her mind and bowed her head, "It would be my honor to stand in your place, sister."

"Good." Benezia said, forcing a smile. "I have contacted my attorney and will be making you executor of my estate. It will remain that way until I have succeeded with the Spectre or if I do not return. All that is mine will become Liara's when she turns two-hundred and fifty."

As they walked off together arm in arm Tatiaria said to her older sister, "You better come back! Or I promise that Liara will be wagging her ass in some bar!"

"Lovely." Benezia laughed at that thought. The thought of Liara wagging anything in a bar would most definitely result in broken glass, overturned barstools and someone bleeding.

* * *

It was dark and cold. Liara didn't know how she had gotten there but she saw her mother off in the distance. "Mother!" Liara cried out as her mother began walking farther away.

"She needs you." A voice whispered, "You must be strong."

Liara tried to ignore the voice as she began running towards her mother who was now walking into a lake of mud that was slowly engulfing her. "Please mother! Please come back!"

"No Liara," The voice called. "She needs you!"

"I don't care!" Liara cried as she tried to cross a hedge between her and her mother. Soon the hedge was holding her ... holding her as that butterfly appeared and fluttered about casting green and gold dust on her ... all the while the hedge was wrapping around her legs and keeping her from the Matriarch. "Please, let me go! Mother!" Benezia stopped, turned to look at Liara, put a finger up to her lips to hush her and then disappeared into the mud. Liara began to scream just as she came awake.

"Mother!" she called out as she rose up out of bed. The dream was so real that she hurried to her mother's bedroom and as she threw the doors open she calmed when she saw her mother fast asleep in her bed. Liara, sweat rolling off her, crept over to where her mother lay and looked at her. She tried to slow her breathing so as not to wake the Matriarch and she looked at the spot next to her mother that was empty. Quietly and gently she slipped into her mother's bed, careful not to disturb her and then curled up to her mother.

As the morning light crawled into the Matriarch's bedroom her private companion came in and smiled. She had found Liara curled up next to her companion more times then she could count since Little could walk. She quietly moved to the Matriarch and whispered, "Benezia."

"Kyri," Benezia reached out to her and the companion pulled away and motioned next to her. Benezia looked over and saw her daughter sleeping and turned back to Kyriake, "I see that we will need to change our morning plans."

Kyriake smiled, "Not the first time. Would you like me to have your morning meal brought to you?"

Benezia said no as she slowly got out of bed and went into her washroom pulling Kyri with her. Benezia was to leave that morning and thought it best to not tell her daughter. Liara would have too many questions and Benezia did not want to worry her daughter. As Benezia touched Kyriake she knew that this was possibly the last time that she would know this kind of pleasure and so she opened her mind and moved into her lover's. Once they had pleasured each other, Kyri was sent away as the Matriarch bathed.

* * *

An hour later and Benezia sat out on her private terrace looking out at the early morning view and thinking of a lost love ... Benezia was gifted in the art of pleasure but used it more for control then release ... Except for one past lover. She had taken that control away from Benezia with just a slight touch ... Marcella T'Loak. How she had desired her, begged for her ... but in the end it was not to last. Her mother, Dianthe, had forbid Benezia to continue the relationship as Marcella was not only a perioikos but an athlete. Neither of these were worthy of a T'Soni.

As Benezia watched as the morning get brighter she remembered taking her daughter to see a skyball match and after the game she had taken Liara into the locker room. As soon as Liara had seen Marcella she had gotten so excited that she tripped over another player and hit her head on the ground. When she came awake Marcella was holding her and taking her to the team doctor as Benezia followed. Liara threw her arms around the athlete's neck and told her how she was her favorite player ever. Marcella had told Benezia later that it was a shame that her mother wasn't as crazy about her ... Benezia just smiled. Now even years later, she still wanted her but it was too late. Marcella had a turian bondmate, two daughters and had finally retired from skyball and moved to Palaven. Six centuries and she still craved her touch ... she was her one true regret.

"Mother?" Benezia turned to see her daughter looking at her worried.

Benezia patted the seat next to her, "Come."

Liara sat next to her mother, placed her head on her shoulder, "I had a nightmare last night."

Benezia pressed her hand against Liara's cheek, "What was the nightmare about this time?"

"You." Benezia froze as Liara continued, "I saw you disappear in a lake of mud and I couldn't stop you ... I couldn't help you ... I screamed and tried to get to you but I wasn't strong enough."

"It was just a dream, Liara." Benezia said as her stomach knotted. "Nothing more."

"But it seemed so real."

Benezia stood and pulled her daughter up, "It was just a dream. Now, go to your room and rest, it is too early for you to be up."

"I'm not sleepy," Liara said as she sat back down and tried to pull her mother back to her. "Please let us sit for awhile longer."

Benezia looked into her daughter's blue eyes and wanted to kiss her and tell her how she was her true heart but she had to start preparing for her trip. "Liara, I do not have time to sit here. I have many duties, you know that. Now go to your own bed." Liara looked down, then rose and headed for the door as Benezia reached out and stopped her. "Daughter, I wish nothing more than to spend this morning with you. I have always delighted in our time together. You are my heart. You understand that I must sometimes put what I want to do to the side? That as a Matriarch my duty to ensure that our species moves forward without losing connection to our past is above everything ... even you." Liara nodded as Benezia reached out and kissed her daughter.

Liara smiled as her mother kissed her and she reciprocated with a tight hug, "Of course, mother. Forgive me for being selfish."

As Liara left her, Benezia turned to the small altar of water to Athame in her room and whispered, "Please Goddess, watch over my daughter. Keep her safe if I cannot. Give her strength and wisdom if I am not here. And make sure that if my sister is left to teach and guide her, that Liara does not end up stripping in some bar." As her prayer ended Benezia heard the sound of the sunrise bell coming from the temple of Athame, as if in answer to her prayer.


	37. Angelus Bell & Jack Daniels

Shepard was praying silently to herself as she heard the Angelus bell start to ring in the distance. She slowly raised her head and looked out at the main thoroughfare that led to the white sand beach of Elysium. Just a week ago she was lying on that white sand, getting a little color and drinking margaritas. Now in between her and that beach were pirates, slavers and a few warlords, less than there was at the start of the blitz but enough to keep her from it. Now she was quietly sitting in the mayor's empty office after dropping a few careless batarians from the rooftop and preparing for when the daylight faded. She needed to return to that chiming bell located in the St. Anthony of Padua Catholic Church tower. She had dropped into both the major retailer Gal-Co and now the Elysium City Hall to not only inspire and encourage the people in each defense post but to also ensure that the enemy did not get an actual bearing on her. With her Naginata sniper rifle and Hesketh scope she had been deadly accurate at the start of the blitz and had too many kills to count, but she knew that the enemy was counting. The batarians tucked in the trenches had a greater fear of the "daimōn", as they were calling her, then the rest of the humans fighting back. She seemed to be everywhere and nowhere. They had even taken to putting up decoys for triangulation purposes so that they could hit her with all their fire power if she fell for one of them. So far, she had not taken a shot at the decoys but it had been close on one. She had almost squeezed the trigger when the wind moved the paper ruse over. Shepard had given a small laugh, "Mother, did you do that? Stop blowing on their traps."

While some worried about her constant movement from one defense post to the next, Shepard had realized very early on that her presence was important to keep up morale. She could see that the resistance, as they were calling themselves now, believed in her and saw her as the sole reason they would make it through. The weight of their dependence on her was heavy but she couldn't let it cripple her. She didn't see herself the way they did but Shepard knew that if these people didn't have someone or something to look up to, they were all lost. There were fellow Alliance soldiers and citizens camped at the city hall, library, Gal-Co and along the main route and Shepard would always arrive at each location smiling as if she had just come from a nice jog in the park. Her friend and crewmate Gunnery Chief Wernher Buckbee, who was camped out at the library, on day five had asked her how she looked so positive and Shepard had just smiled at him as she held up a candy bar and said, "We get the chance to save innocent lives and eat free snickers, Bucky! This is the best way to spend a furlough. Anyone can lie on the beach, but we get to save a community. What's not to like?"

The truth was that Shepard remembered that long ago flight to Illium and her mother's words, _you can either join them in their fear or you can offer hope_. Shepard was scared, tired and wanted someone else to take the reins … she simply wanted to call it a day but the words of a pastor pushed the young Alliance Naval Operations Chief. _I challenge you to think of others, to look outside of yourself and be a beacon of light when everything seems dark_. As she stood looking out towards the beach she whispered, "Well, momma ... It's dark. Not sure if this is the beacon of light that you meant though. I'll do my part if you just stay near me."

Shepard found it funny and yet quite appropriate that the church was all hers, even if it was a Catholic church. Maybe it was being the preacher woman's kid that made her gravitate towards it or that at 215 feet up in the tower, separated by 384 steps from earth to belfry, it made her feel safe. No one else wanted to climb up all those steps or be in the tower when the bell began to chime at 0600, 1200 and 1800. The bell would ring in three groups of three chimes with a pause in between each group which was then followed by 9 consecutive strokes. Father Quaglia had told her he could shut it off but Shepard had said no. "Father, as long as the tower stays loud the enemy won't think that some idiot would sit up there." The priest had smiled at her response, asked if he could bless her with holy water and say a prayer. Shepard looked at him and accepted, "Sure Father, I'll take all the help I can get." Shepard, seeing the oversized basement and how secure it was, had the children and adults not fit to fight moved there for their safety. Father Quaglia, Sisters Aquinata, Benedict and Ascenza all worked around the clock to attend to the hideaways as well as the wounded brought there. They also made sure to keep the 'Good Shepherd', as Shepard was christened by Sr. Benedict, in their daily prayers.

The bell that was both her friend and foe had the words _O Rex Gloriæ Veni Cum Pace_ inscribed on it and Shepard had punched the phrase into her omni-tool to translate. _O King of Glory, Come with Peace_ it read back in English. "Peace," Shepard whispered as she pulled her rifle up and peered through the Hesketh scope, "that would be nice right about now." With the bell chiming while she was camped there, she would climb halfway down the tower, plop in ear plugs and sit it out. Not that the plugs cut the sound out completely but it did help. The bell had saved her life and others once when she had went into a micro sleep and a batarian had made it across the field. The bell shook her awake and just as she popped up, she saw him duck into the city hall. She quickly began to tap out a warning in Morse code on her omni-tool to the guys in the building. "Come on my little scout, understand this." Shepard had chosen six of her LOTF crew to work the radios and each of these had been a member of the Boy Scouts that had earned the Radio Merit Badge. As she waited she wiped the sweat off her forehead and realized that she wasn't breathing. What seemed an eternity passed and then the message came back, "Four eyes dead". Shepard let out a deep breath of relief which passed quickly as she saw six batarians break from the trench that the enemy had created at the entrance of the main street. Shepard smiled, began quietly singing "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" as she dropped all six in beat with the song. Then she gathered her weapons, informed an imaginary Tommy Lasorda that she couldn't accept his offer to join the 1974 Dodgers "due to a prior commitment, Tommy … but tell Davey I still love him" and headed for the next point … Gal-Co.

Six days in with no true sleep, snacks only for food and on rare occasion lousy tasting Elysium coffee made her moody and a little punch drunk, but she made sure that she kept hydrated. Keeping hydrated meant increased pee breaks that included struggling to urinate without being caught with her pants down in a squat out in the field. This was the only time that she wished that she were a guy, "Is this what penis envy really means?" she had joked to Bucky on the first day as she squatted in an empty coffee can in an alley that they had been pinned in for four hours.

"Where did you get that coffee can?" He asked as he kept a look out.

"Inside the trash bin," She said as the sound of urine started. "There is brown gunk in it that I think is tobacco … At least that is what I am telling myself."

Yep, penis envy while squatting over Folgers.

After 144 plus hours of this crazy run she was getting really good at relieving herself mid-stride almost and any modesty that she might have had with the males around her were soon left behind. She could flush her system in under a few seconds and be back in position before the enemy would have time to stand. As for the lack of sleep, she had read somewhere that a teenager once went 264 hours with no sleep so she had another 251 hours at least in her bank. She hoped.

Staff Lieutenant Lezeu Moldovan was the highest ranking Alliance officer still alive and located in Elysium's Gal-Co. He was in his late forties and was about to retire from the Alliance. He and his wife had saved enough money to open a restaurant in Constanța, Romania and all he wanted was to return to his hometown, to his wife and to their three teenage children. After the initial conflict resulted in only a fifth of the Alliance Marines and Naval personnel surviving, Moldovan had looked at Shepard as they were discussing the new designated defense posts and whispered, "We will make it?" Shepard had placed her hand on his shoulder, looked him in the eyes and said, "Da!" She had made him feel more confident but inside she gave them just 24 hours to survive. _Why spoil the ending?_ She had thought to herself as she answered him. Now as the light disappeared, Moldovan stopped her, "Shepard, you must sleep. Rest here and I'll wake you if there is a change in our situation." Shepard slung her Naginata sniper rifle over her back, Kessler pistol in hand, joked "no rest for the wicked, Moldy!" and began her quarter mile sprint from the Elysium City Hall back towards the St. Anthony of Padua Catholic Church.

Moldovan had watched as Shepard had quickly rallied the few soldiers left along with the majority of the citizens following the first two days of the blitz. She had done this shortly after the head of their leader, Major Varus, was placed on a pole to show the humans how their leader had failed. Marine Major Varus had been tough and brutal but also sometimes too careless while he led the fight. Shepard had admired his strength and determination but worried as both sides saw heavy casualty and the bodies piled up at the beach side of the city. With his leadership the batarians were caught just outside the heart of the city as the Alliance moved in with their fleet to battle the raiders in the skies. This took a great burden off groundside as it kept the batarians from doing air strikes or sending in more ground troops. But instead of re-grouping to review their resources, enemies' location and strategy the Major felt that it was a waste of time. So he and 52 Marines battled their way farther into enemy territory with only 3 making it out.

The evening following the death and beheading of the Major, Shepard with three Marines stripped down naked, covered each other in mud, took only their weapons and carefully snuck behind enemy lines where they overpowered two of the leaders. Shepard personally snuck behind the one that was determined to be the head of the ground slavers and slit his throat. They decapitated both leaders, hid their bodies and then carried the heads back across the line … The heads were then carried just twenty feet from the enemy lines during the darkest part of the night and raised up on poles like the Major had been. Come daybreak the heads became visible with the morning light causing the enemy to panic. As some of the batarians tried to leave, their own side shot them in the middle of the desertion. It had made Shepard smile because she knew that they might have a chance of surviving. The batarians were like humans … they also felt fear and could display cowardice the same as humans. _We just might win_.

Moldovan had stepped aside to let the Alliance Naval Operations Chief lead since she seem to not only know what the batarians were going to do before they did it, but she was also willing to make decisions that he just couldn't make. She at times seemed ruthless but he knew that the leader needed to be if they were to survive. She had quickly cut off all roads in to the heart of the town and the batarians responded by digging a trench at the main entrance. Shepard had found it almost comical that the batarians were building a trench since they were using the dead. "Please someone tell me that they smell odors like us." Shepard had said half to herself.

Bucky had overheard, "Probably. Why?"

Shepard motioned towards the trench using bodies in place of earth or bags and half laughed, "Because in a couple days that place should really gag anything when those bodies start to decompose."

Shepard herself had taken out at least a hundred and sixty batarians with her rifle alone, not that she was counting. For the past six days there had been instances of the enemy trying to push in closer but Shepard would quickly spot the leaders in the bunch and drop them. This demoralized and left the rest of the group confused. Each defense post had plenty of ammo, rations and batteries for the oversized flashlights taken from Gal-Co due to the help of her LOTF team that scurried about. This was the name that she had given to the younger citizens that she had enlisted. The LOTF stood for Lord of the Flies and when she had started handing some of them weapons from bows to rifles she received shouts of protests from some of the parents.

"These are children!" A woman had protested as Shepard gave a rifle to a girl of fourteen.

"Yes, they are." Shepard said as she handed another teen a bow. "See that man over there?" She said to the acned boy as he took it, "He can show you how to properly use this," As the boy trotted off, Shepard instructed after him. "And aim at the chest; it's the biggest target on them. Don't try to be fancy with a head shot."

"What kind of monster are you? Someone stop her from using our children!" The woman had started to try and rile up the other citizens as she stood in front of her teenage son.

Shepard grabbed the woman by her shirt, pulled her close and said in a cold stern voice, "We do not have the luxury to baby these kids … just as I do not have time to coddle you. If you want these children to see another year then they need to join the fight. Only then do we stand a fighting chance."

The woman struggled free and pulled her husband in front of her, "But they are children! You have no right! Think of what this will do to them if they kill someone. The years of mental trauma they will live with. Years of-"

Shepard began rubbing her temples with her middle finger and thumb as she cut the woman off, "Years that they won't have at all if they do not fight."

The woman began talking more to the crowd as she answered, "Can't we talk to the batarians? If they knew that there were children here they would go away. They can't all be bad. We at least must try and end this peacefully … for our children."

Shepard stepped closer to the woman and pushing the husband to the side, "In Mindoir you know what they did to the children?" Shepard gritted her teeth. "They put chips in their heads. Chips. They pulled back the skin," Shepard made a motion of the skin being pulled back from the temple area, "drilled the chip in and then simply put the skin back into place … where they sewed it together without any anesthetic. The screams still ring in my ears. The children were then thrown into cages like animals and transported to their ships. Those children, if alive, are somewhere living as slaves. That's what they plan for these children. Now, if you are done with your tapioca delusions … I have things to do to protect this place, to protect these children."

As Shepard went back to outfitting the new LOTF team the woman was still calling Shepard a monster for using the children as her husband tried calming his wife. It was that woman's teenage son that had carried a duffel bag filled with ammo, first aid, food and blankets up to the belfry for Shepard a day later and had apologized for his mother. "She just doesn't understand. My mom thinks that everyone wants to do good." Shepard looked at the boy without emotion and the young man lowered his head, "No, that's a lie. Truth is she just doesn't want me fighting. I know that she would sacrifice everyone else, even my father, to see me survive this." Shepard went over to the boy, lifted his head up by the chin and told him that his mother was doing what mother's do. "She loves you. She would die for you so give her a break. Don't judge your mother, OK?" The boy wiped his eyes as he nodded. Shepard smiled at the boy, appreciated that the boy had set up her base because the less she had to carry between locations the quicker she could get there, but she had wished that he had stayed in his designated spot. She scolded him for leaving his station but then thanked him for the set-up. The boy grinned, grabbed his bow and promised not to stray again as he left her very well stocked in the tower.

Now as she moved across the dark town, Shepard under her breath silently quoted a scripture that she quoted every run as her own personal blessing;

It is God who arms me with strength  
and keeps my way secure.  
He makes my feet like the feet of a deer;  
he causes me to stand on the heights.  
He trains my hands for battle;  
my arms can bend a bow of bronze.

As she passed the library she decided to stop in and refill her canteen as well as check in with Bucky. He had kept a bottle of Jack Daniels and she wanted to make sure that he wasn't getting drunk. As she entered into the dimly lit first floor she put her rifle down against a chair and quietly walked over to a table. She pulled out her almost empty water canteen and as she turned and put the spout of the canteen to her lips she felt a sudden and extreme pain in her chest, ribs and back as she flew over the table and on to the floor. She had landed on her back and was struggling to catch her breath as she looked up to see three batarians looking down at her. How they had got there she had no idea and at first she thought that she was hallucinating. But with the pain, lack of air and dizziness that the batarian's kick to her chest had caused, she knew that she was not imagining them. She also quickly realized that her rifle was more than twenty feet from her and that she was about to die when they did something surprising.

The three batarians turned their backs on her as they strategized on getting to the fourth floor where the resistance was stationed. As they continued to talk among themselves, it was then that Shepard realized they thought she was just some weak nobody. It helped that she was dressed in civvies and not a uniform and that they had also not seen or noticed her rifle or the pistol tucked in her belt at her back. They may have not noticed but she remembered the pistol was there … it had made her almost scream out in pain as it pound into her back when she landed on it. Thank the Bacchus that she had the wind knocked out of her so she couldn't scream.

She began to slowly move forward as she reached behind her. She carefully wrapped her hand around the pistol, released the safety, pulled it out in front of her and in three squeezes killed the batarians where they stood.

Ten minutes later and Shepard was sitting on the same table that she had flipped over laughing with Bucky and a few others about the incident. Bucky had asked if she was hurt but Shepard had said no. Why tell him that she thought her ribs were broken or that she was breathing shallow to limit the pain in her torso. Shepard then told Bucky that they needed to figure out how the enemy had gotten past all of the defense points with no one seeing them. Bucky brought out his Jack Daniels and poured her a glass. The glass of whiskey was sitting next to her on the desk and she picked up the glass and admired the dark amber color.


	38. Mayngo & Sovereign

The glass of whiskey was sitting in front of Liara as she sat at her makeshift desk and logged the day's activities in her netpad. This was her fifth trip back to Kur'deshia in the last three years and after the second trip, Liara was heading the expeditions. Dr. Titum Ronak had been an inspiration for Liara and he had taught her everything he knew before he passed away at the old age of forty-two. His death had hurt although not like Zazzy and Liara followed the asari custom of honoring him with pain, reflection, gratefulness, acceptance, peace.

This evening, Liara was finishing up her day's work as music of Akdhat floated softly through her tent and out into the cavern mixing with the sound of falling icicles and an occasional shift of the underground stream now partially made of ice. It was the season of winter on Kur'deshia and temperatures could drop below -23 celsius, but thankfully today it was -5 celsius. A fellow asari colleague had left that glass of human whiskey with her saying that it would cut the cold but she had to be careful to monitor the effects when drinking it because it was alcohol. One of the many secrets that asari did not share was that they could not get drunk, at least not on alcohol. They would appear to be drunk if it served their purpose but it was a secret that was kept for reasons of advantage against other species when needed.

There was only one thing that could get an asari truly intoxicated and that was a fruit grown solely on the cold and methane-ammonia atmospheric planet Zesmeni. The fruit was similar in appearance to Earth's pomegranates but with a purple skin and gold inside with seeds the color of silver like titanium. The asari needed to eat only four seeds on average to not only become intoxicated but to also increase their sexual desire. The fruit, called mayngo, grew in patches of bushes that were found in a small rock garden and with only an average of sixty bushes growing a year and each producing roughly thirty-three mayngo annually; this made them not only expensive but an exclusive item of the very wealthy and elite. The best four hundred of the crop per year was turned into a type of wine and sold at three asari-exclusive restaurants located on Thessia, Illium and the Citadel. Liara had seen both the fruit and wine at her home but never felt a desire to try it. There were rumors that an asari had slipped some of the wine to her salarian lover and that the salarian had died as a result. Liara did not know if the story was true but she knew that giving the fruit or wine to other species was strictly forbidden.

She looked at the amber color of the whiskey, scrunched her nose and after taking a whiff of the liquid, emptied the contents in one quick gulp. The liquid's warmth could be felt as it traveled to her stomach and Liara enjoyed the feeling but not the smoky medicine after-taste. She had been shown how to act drunk by Sibila once and on Illium she had seen many different species inebriated, but she had no time for play-acting. She finished her report and then started stretching in her seat as some of her colleagues who were sitting around the camp fire erupted in laughter. After a long slow day of carefully scooping up and sifting through dirt the team of asari and salarians were chatting about their families, historical finds on previous digs, sports and warmer weather. Another eruption of laughter was heard as Liara flipped her netpad's screen over to her e-mail and her heart stopped. There was a letter from her mother.

These past couple years she had sensed a distance growing between her and the Matriarch along with small changes in her mother. The Matriarch was always busy and her time limited, but Liara was allowed less and less access and only in the evenings would she sneak into her mother's room and sleep with her. The mornings would find her mother kissing her awake and then the Matriarch was gone for the day. The changes that she saw in the Matriarch were so small and indefinable that after the tenderness of her mother in the mornings she told herself that she was being silly. Silly until the last time that she and the Matriarch were both at the T'Soni estate just three months past.

Benezia had arrived home after being away for three weeks and as usual had denied Liara access to her presence during the day. But this time she had also started locking her bedroom in the evenings so that Liara could not sneak in. Her mother had never done that in her life and after the fourth night Liara had broken down in tears at the door crying to be let in. The only response was silence as she heard the rustle of her mother's movements inside. "Mother, please let me in. I am sorry if I did anything wrong. Please mother." Silence even when the tears began to fall.

Liara in desperation had even stood outside her mother's reading room two days later and begged again to be let in only to have one of her mother's acolyte inform her that the Matriarch could not be disturbed. She had asked everyone from Shiala to Alestia what was going on but they simply shook their heads and walked away. Liara's panic increased when Kyriake had packed her things and moved out of the house on the Matriarch's orders. Kyriake had gone to the Guildhall and saw Liara in her office just so she could say goodbye, despite the Matriarch's strict instruction to not see her daughter. Kyriake, in tears, told Liara that she cared about her and the Matriarch and that if Liara ever needed someone to talk to that she would always be there for her. Liara couldn't help but worry that she would be asked to leave as well.

When Liara reached out to her Theia to tell her what had just happened with Kyriake and her own treatment, Tatiaria had seemed distant and rushed Liara off the phone, "Liara, trust the Matriarch. I must go." It wasn't until the day that Liara was leaving on a trip to Illium that Benezia appeared at the window of her private reading room and watched Liara get into the skylimo for the port. Liara had looked up, caught her breath as she saw her mother and as she went to wave Benezia turned away.

Liara worried that she had somehow disappointed her mother but she was quickly reassured by her cousin Sibila on Illium that the Matriarch was just busy with all of the demands from her various businesses that she was responsible for. "Li-Li, according to mother, there are some political shifts that might negatively impact our financial wealth and standing. You know how with politics there is always secrecy … mother says that it is requiring the Matriarch to move about in absolute secrecy." Sibila had tried to explain and reassure her younger cousin. Despite her cousin's words, Liara feared that the truth was darker. That it had something to do with the turian Spectre that she had met at the Opik Dinner on Illium years prior. The same turian that had shown up at their home.

For the last year, she had tried on numerous occasions to get more information out of the acolytes that she was close to, as well as her Theia and Kyriake but no one would talk about the Matriarch's activities, no one. Liara would have confronted her mother earlier but between her mother's absences and her own busy schedule between the Guildhall, Eli Academy, time spent on Kur'deshia and visits to her cousin on Illium she rarely saw her mother anymore. Now after months of no communication an e-mail from the Matriarch was in her inbox. Normally Liara would read this last, but it had been too long.

LIARA,

I WILL NOT BE HOME WHEN YOU RETURN LATER THIS MONTH AND MUST REMIND YOU THAT MY ACTIVITIES ARE NOT YOUR CONCERN. THE ACOLYTES AND TATIARIA SAID THAT YOU HAVE BEEN ASKING THEM WHAT I AM DOING AND WHERE I AM GOING. THAT IS FORBIDDEN. NOT ONLY FORBIDDEN BUT DISHONORS ME.

IT DISTURBS ME GREATLY THAT I MUST REMIND MY OWN DAUGHTER OF HER PLACE. YOU, AS MY DAUGHTER, DO NOT HAVE SPECIAL RIGHTS OR EXTRA PRIVILEGES. YOU ARE BUT A MAIDEN AND I AM A MATRIARCH FIRST AND FOREMOST. YOU MUST LEARN TO KEEP YOUR PLACE. I MAY HAVE OVERLOOKED YOUR BREACH OF PROTOCOL IN THE PAST BUT NO MORE. YES, YOU ARE MY DAUGHTER BUT I CAN HAVE YOU REMOVED FROM MY HOME IF YOU CONTINUE TO FORGET YOUR PLACE.

YOU ARE NOT A MATRIARCH. YOU ARE NOT ME. I AM DISAPPOINTED THAT I HAVE TO REMIND YOU OF YOUR PLACE AND SO OFTEN.

ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW OR UNDERSTAND IS THAT MY RESPONSIBILITIES ARE REQUIRING ME TO FOCUS ON MATTERS OF GALACTIC IMPORTANCE THAT MAKE YOUR WANTS AND NEEDS NO LONGER MY CONCERN. I AM EVEN NOW CONTEMPLATING HAVING YOU RETURN TO ILLIUM. IF IT WERE NOT FOR YOUR TRAINING AT THE ACADEMY I WOULD HAVE NO HESITATION.

KEEPING THAT IN MIND, MY SCHEDULE IS SUCH THAT I WILL MISS YOUR PASSAGE INTO ADULTHOOD ON YOUR 100th BIRTHDAY NEXT YEAR. TATIARIA HAS AGREED TO STAND IN MY PLACE AND I HOPE THAT YOU HAVE STARTED THINKING ABOUT WHO YOU WILL CHOOSE AS YOUR MONIUM. THE YEAR WILL PASS QUICKLY SO MAKE SURE THAT YOU START PREPARING WITHIN THE NEXT FEW MONTHS. I WILL NOT DISCUSS THIS WITH YOU. IT IS SAID AND SO IT WILL BE DONE.

BENEZIA

Liara could feel her stomach tighten up as she reread, 'I WILL MISS YOUR PASSAGE INTO ADULTHOOD.' The only reasons that a mother would miss her daughter's passage into adulthood was death or a mother's way of showing disapproval of her daughter. If Benezia did not stand by Liara it would say that the Matriarch was not proud of her and that she did not approve of the asari' life choices. As Liara re-read the line over and over she felt hot tears roll down her face and her stomach start to cramp up. After one more read through of the letter she placed her face in her hands and began to cry. "Why mother?" Liara choked out, "What have I done?"

* * *

_What have I done_? Benezia thought as she looked at the shuttle filled with a group of her followers. She had met with her acolytes and commando guards just two days prior in the great ballroom of her home and explained to them a portion of what she had been involved with for the last few years. She explained that the turian Spectre, Saren Arterius, had located an artifact from a time long past that could change everything that they knew. Believing that the discovery could be used for good or for the darker path that Saren was going, Benezia was trying to guide Saren down a less destructive path. She carefully explained the dangers and highlighted the chances that anyone who continued on following her might die. She wanted, no ... she needed to make sure that they understood all the risks so that they could make their own choices with full knowledge of the dangers awaiting them. After the meeting she saw over half of her acolytes and three of her commandos choose to not follow her into the dangerous mission. The acolytes and commandos that left were in tears and offering prayers for her and the others safety with hopes that this mission would be over soon and they could return to the Matriarch. Each and every asari present at that meeting was sworn to absolute secrecy and Benezia knew that the oaths would be honored even to her death.

Benezia had seen the data from Dr. Shu Qian's flash drive just that year as Saren was slowly giving her more and more access. He had on more than one occasion subtly hinted that her daughter, Dr. Liara T'Soni, might be beneficial since the relic looked as if might have some connection to the Protheans. "We might need her expertise to help decipher some of the findings aboard the warship." Saren had said. Benezia agreed that if there was a need she would reach out to her daughter but inside she knew that Liara would never step on that warship, never be brought into what she was doing and never be near Saren again.

Saren had also told her that Sovereign appeared to have some kind of field that somehow corrupted minds and he believed that between the two they could withstand it. Saren then requested that the Matriarch enter his mind to gauge him as he started to come in contact with the warship called Sovereign. As the Matriarch entered his mind she moved about pulling memories, patterns and most of all his truth. She found that underneath his anger and need for revenge there was still a spark of his light. There was still his drive to protect the turians and a sense of loyalty to them. She also touched the pain that was attached to the loss of his brother and was the driving force behind his desire to put the new species called humans under his foot. Once she was no longer in his mind he had asked if she had everything she needed. "Yes. I have everything I need." Benezia answered.

Benezia had been traveling to the base that had the research team set up by Edan Had'dah which was located near the Perseus Veil. She had started reviewing their findings and now Saren was ready to make contact with the warship. Benezia agreed to wait on the research base where she would enter his mind once again after he returned to see if there were any changes.

Now as she sat looking out at the stars she felt her stomach knot up. Not at what she was about to do but about what she had done. She knew that Liara had probably received the letter from her. The letter that had torn at her very soul to write and she knew that it would crush Liara. Benezia knew that not being at her daughter's birthday would dishonor her but if things did not go as planned she would do more dishonor being there.

She knew that her daughter would believe that her not being there was a sign that she disapproved of her but that was the farthest thing from the truth. Liara was becoming the person that Benezia had hoped for when she first held her in her arms ... This belief was further shown to be true when Benezia had flown with Liara to Sur'Kesh and attended the funeral of Dr. Ronak. Liara had been so mindful of those suffering around her, thoughtful in the speech she had given in honor of her friend and careful to not offend that Benezia fought back tears of pride. Liara was showing the maturity and social graces of a young matron while displaying the complete openness of a maiden. Benezia could see that her daughter was growing up into a strong, well-spoken and kind asari that learned from other species outside of her own ... and it made her proud. But she also hoped that her daughter would not miss out on the joys of being a maiden. She needed to laugh more and experience pleasures as well. She had told her daughter that on the flight back and Liara had promised that she was happy and enjoying new things. Benezia had smiled and then talked about how well the Serrice Delphinus were doing that year which was a topic that both T'Soni's could chat about for hours.

Benezia looked out at the stars and remembered her daughter's pleas and tears outside her bedroom. She knew that she was going deeper into the black hole with Saren and letting Liara near her might make her stop. Seeing her young daughter made her question the dangerous path that she was on and that was not acceptable. The Matriarch could not waver in her mission to stop Saren. Liara was a liability and therefore had to be removed from her life.

"Mother, please let me in. Please." Her daughter had cried at her bedroom door that awful night. She had stood just on the other side, tears running down her own face and wanting so much to let her Little Wing in. She had even reached out to the door handle in a moment of weakness and stopped … stopped and moved away as if from a snake. "Mother! What did I do? Do you not love me anymore?" she heard the one true love of her life cry out. Benezia's heart felt as if it was on fire and as she fought crying out in pain, she placed her hand over her mouth and ran to her washroom where she closed out her daughter's cries.

No, with the potential dangers and the risk of not surviving, she was trying to distance herself from her daughter so that it did not cause her to hesitate or question her own plans at this stage. She had watched her daughter the day that Liara left for Illium and hated the pane of glass between them. She wanted to call out to her daughter, tell her that she loved her, stroke her cheek, kiss her freckles on her cheeks … but that would have been weakness. She cursed herself, cursed Saren, cursed Sovereign as she turned away from the window and thought, _you can't be weak, not now. You must stay focused_!


	39. Belfry Tango

"Dammit!" Shepard put down the rifle, "Stay focused!"

Shepard had just shot three times into a stump thinking it was a batarian. She had been struggling with paranoia and hallucinations off and on since day four of no sleep and that lack of sleep had just caused her to think that the stump was the enemy. She wiped her eyes, scared that she might hurt an innocent person next time she had a hallucination. Embarrassed and concerned, Shepard looked around to see if anyone saw her and once she determined that she was alone she kicked the stump. This caused pain in her side and she cursed herself again. "You are an idiot Shepard!"

Half an hour later she was carefully climbing up the tower for her fourth time and once she opened the trap door and popped her head in, she saw that one of the nuns or the priest had been up in the belfry. There was more water, food and a new bucket for her toilet needs. She laughed and remembered how she had told the priest and nuns that she was protestant when they had first met hoping that they would leave her alone in the tower but nope. They were like her mother. "Good goobly-goop!" Shepard muttered under her breath as she looked at the bread and honey. She briefly took her position and used her scope to look at the batarians' deathbed, as she called it and once she knew that there was no movement at the entrance to the main street she put her rifle down and lifted her shirt.

She had been trying to ignore the pain in her rib area on her left side but her breathing had taken on a grating sound. There were also splotches of bruising all down the side. Now here she was struggling to ignore the pain, ignore her need to sleep, ignore her doubts, ignore her fears and hope that the Alliance would get control soon. She could see the fighting off in the distance as the Alliance Navy engaged the enemy in the skies which kept the batarians from attacking the resistance happening on the ground. Shepard knew that two to three well placed air strikes would be the end of them. She picked up the bread and honey and heard her stomach growl. "Thanks!" she whispered toward the trap door.

Elysium was supposed to be a nice break after spending six months on the frigate SSV Gettysburg patrolling the Skyllian Verge**.** She and three other crewmates were on shore leave and on their third day were at the Amsterdam Silo drinking and dancing when the blitz started. Shepard, unlike others around her, knew exactly what was going on and quickly gathered the Alliance soldiers and a few civilians that looked like they could handle themselves and headed for Gal-Co. Since they were on leave they did not have any weapons so they needed to arm themselves pronto. Once they had weapons, Shepard had looked at those with her and said, "Kill anything not human and kill any human acting with them. No hesitation. No mercy." She knew how those words sounded but any hesitation and Elysium would be Mindoir with the children being carted off first.

Sheriff Bozidar Khasbulatov was off-duty and shopping at the retail store Gal-Co located just off Main Street when he witnessed Shepard and her group that she had quickly assembled pulling arms and ammo for use. The Sheriff not knowing what was happening yet outside the store tried to stop them. As a few of the men tried to bring him up to speed, Shepard stripped off her dress and heels causing the men in the store to stop and stare at her. She pulled on a pair of cargo pants, v-neck t-shirt, flak jacket, belt to hold up the oversized pants, socks and hiking boots. She made sure that all the items that she picked were black and when she saw a black canteen she thanked Bacchus. As she picked up her dress and shoes she realized that a few guys were still focused on her so ... as she placed them in a backpack she had pulled off a shelf ... she said to no one in particular, "I'm not fighting wearing this dress or heels … but I'm not leaving them either. These shoes are Christian Louboutin and the dress is vintage D&G." Those items were somewhere in that same alley that she left the Folgers can. If she made it through this she was determined to go back there and retrieve the items. _Vintage Dolce & Gabbana_.

* * *

Now here it was, day six and Shepard knew that they couldn't hold out much longer. The ammo was dwindling, the rag tag group was tired and they had lost about half of their members just in the last three days. A great portion was killed in the many intermittent skirmishes with another portion losing their nerve and either fleeing to the hills or hiding in the basement with the women and children. Shepard wanted to kick the frick out of them but she couldn't waste any time or energy on them. "Let their cowardice condemn them if they survive," Shepard had told Bucky.

"How about we don't let them survive!" Bucky had said in anger.

Shepard shook her head, "No, Bucky. Let's take that anger and focus it on the four-eyed bastards."

Of the ninety-some odd people left fighting, roughly a dozen were women; two dozen were young boys and four teenage girls. Shepard was amazed that none of the men had appeared to have a problem following her … even her LT and the Sheriff seemed relieved that the weight was off their shoulders. Not that either man was a coward, but they recognized that pride had no place when you were fighting to stay alive. As she looked out at the different stations she couldn't help but feel proud in the men, women and children that had stood ground with her.

As she finished her honey sandwich her omni-tool went off. The Sheriff had taken two bullets to the torso as he had tried moving from the City Hall to the library and was now in a makeshift hospital in Gal-Co. "Frick!" Shepard almost yelled. She had grown to really depend on his support and the thought of him being taken out of the game made her stomach tighten up. She could feel the panic inside her trying to take over but she quickly picked up her rifle, scoped out a careless batarian in the trench and ZIP! As the batarian's head snapped back, blood flew and other batarians looked out quickly and then ducked. Shepard had then lowered her head and closed her eyes ... "God, please send help soon. We can't hold out much longer and I don't want any more of these people to be hurt or killed because of me. I need you to give a little help here. Even if it is the strength to stay awake, a steady hand and clear vision." Shepard opened her eyes to see a young brown-haired boy with a cow-lick poking his head in at the trap door.

"Can I help?" He asked softly.

Shepard smiled, "You just did." She took the remains of her food and handed it to him, "Now go back to the others and tell the Father that if he has any favors left from God to please call them in."

"Favors?" The boy asked confused.

Shepard laughed and told him that the Father would understand. "Now go before a batarian sees you!"

With that the boy scurried down the tower leaving a laughing Shepard. "Thanks for the second wind," She said to the skies. Grabbing her canteen, she took a gulp of water, put on her night goggles, picked up her rifle and as she peered through the scope she said, "Now back to my vacation of naked men and whiskey."

* * *

"Damn it! Focus!" Her eyes were blurry as daylight began to spread across Elysium and she knew that it was due to fatigue. She had been pretty much living with her right eye peering through the Hesketh scope for seven days. Seven days equaled 168 hours now. "Getting closer to your 264 hour record boy," Shepard croaked with her dry throat. She put down her rifle, took a swig of water from her canteen, relieved herself and then stretched out on the bell tower floor, careful to avoid moving the wrong way with her ribs. Ten minutes later and she was back in position monitoring the batarian's front line. She heard the trap door open and saw Sister Aquinata pop her head up.

Shepard had liked the elderly nun the moment that she first saw her. She had a glow about her that even in this dark situation made you feel a sense of peace. Her smile lit up the room and she had the gift of Hannah when it came to calming others. She smiled at Shepard and said in her sing-song voice, "Good morning, good shepherd."

Shepard smiled at her and helped her up and into the belfry, "Good morning, sister." As the nun pulled on Shepard's left arm pain shot down her left side which brought her to her knees. Shepard twisted to her left as a sharp stabbing pain shot through her chest area and she cried out as the nun grabbed her by her shoulders to keep her from falling over.

"You're hurt!" the sister said as she dropped to her own knees.

Shepard would have argued that she wasn't but she was just too tired and in too much pain. "I'll be fine in a moment."

"By the looks of you … well, you will be passed out in a moment. Where are you hurt?"

Shepard carefully raised her shirt and the nun gasped at the black and blue bruising that was over her left side. "It looks worse than it really is," Shepard struggled to say.

"Well that's a relief," Aquinata said as she began to feel around Shepard's ribs. "Because if it felt how it looks … well, you might be dead."

Shepard couldn't help but laugh at the nun's comment which caused her to grimace in pain, "Aaaagh."

The nun continued to feel around Shepard's left side as she saw the distinct boot print of a bruise, "Letting someone walk on you is not wise." Shepard agreed as she also looked at the bruise and the nun added, "Of course, you could be bleeding internally as we speak."

"Really, I'm okay." Shepard said through a moan of discomfort at the nun's touch.

The sister shook her head, told Shepard that she would be right back. As the nun went down the trap door, Shepard went back to her station, breathing carefully and keeping her eyes on the batarians' deathbed. A short time passed and then something caught the corner of her eye. As Shepard looked towards the movement she saw the nun scurry away from the church and carefully move towards the pharmacy located two blocks away. "Really?" Shepard sighed. The nuns and the priest could move down that tower or up it faster than even Shepard. She just knew that there was a secret elevator they used. "Good goobly-goop! Why are women of God that I meet so damn stubborn?" Shepard said as she could see the nun duck behind a building. She then looked up into the sky and asked, "Did you send her to watch over me, mother? Or did you possess some poor old nun's body and you are now trotting it across a battlefield? If you've taken possession try and keep her from getting hurt."

Six kills, multiple Morse messages to the various defense posts on the current status, a Snicker and an empty canteen later the nun was seen scurrying back to the church. Shepard couldn't help but smile at the nun's courage and when she popped her head up through the trap door later she had two Gal-Co bags with her. Shepard laughed, "You are a risk taker, sister!"

Aquinata smiled back, dropped the bags and then motioned for Shepard to sit down and pull off her shirt. "Never come between a woman and her shopping."

"Nuns shop?" Shepard teased.

Sister Aquinata giggled and then said in a serious tone, "Let's hope that you haven't broken three or more ribs."

"Why?"

"That could be fatal," she said as she pulled out a hand held x-ray machine. As she waved it over Shepard's left side she let out a sigh. "I've got good news and bad news. Which one you want first?"

Shepard lowered her arm, "Up to you doc."

"Well, only the 7th rib is actually fractured," she said as she pulled out a bottle of ibuprofen. "It can heal on its own, usually with no other problems."

Shepard took the two pills that the nun handed her and popped them in her mouth, "An bebd mew?"

Aquinata laughed, "The bad news is … well, it is going to be painful and you will just have to grin and bear it. But I think you have mastered that already. It is important though that you keep your lungs strong and healthy … you should take good deep breaths throughout the day okay?"

"Yes, doctor."

"And take a couple of these as noted on the bottle," she said handing the ibuprofen to Shepard. "I wish that I could have given you something stronger but you need all your wits."

Both the sister and Shepard looked towards the batarians as Shepard went to put her shirt back on. The nun stopped her and opened the other bag. "Here is a clean version of what you have been wearing along with liquid soap, shampoo and fresh underwear."

"Sister, I am fighting a battle not going on a date." Shepard teased.

"Look, if you expect me to visit you up here you will freshen up at least a little," she argued. "I'll stand guard."

Shepard laughed as she took the nun up on her offer. The water and soap on her face and arms felt refreshing and the soap smelled good. As she washed her hair she tilted her face towards the sister, "How did you know what to do?"

The nun looking through the scope of Shepard's rifle answered, "I wasn't always a nun. I was a doctor in my hometown of Stavanger a lifetime ago."

"A viking doctor nun?" Shepard laughed, rinsing her hair.

"A viking doctor nun that is now holding your rifle," she jokingly responded.

Shepard began to dry her hair with the towel and then moved next to her where she took possession of her post and rifle, "So how did you end up a nun and here off-world?"

Sister Aquinata looked at Shepard and as she patted her on the arm the nun softly said, "I would love to share stories with you my young friend. Maybe sometime in the future? Right now you need to focus."

* * *

By midday, Shepard contemplated heading to the library but she knew that her ribs and chest were going to slow her travel down. So she messaged Staff Lieutenant Lezeu Moldovan that she was going to hold her position at the church. Throughout the day she would drop a few enemies as they tried a push and when a few made it through she would tap out where they had made it to, resulting in members of the resistance locating and killing them.

It was just before 1800 that Shepard crawled down the trap door to wait out the bell when she came face to face with three batarians coming up the spiraling stone staircase. Shepard rushed back through the trap door just as the bell began to ring and the sound forced her to cover her ears. The first batarian was quick and halfway through the trap door before Shepard had a chance to close it and she began to kick him in the face. Her fourth kick was perfectly placed and she heard a crunching noise followed by his blood splattering against the trap door. Before he had time to come or go, Shepard picked up the bucket that she used as a chamber pot and turned it over on him and then forced him out of the belfry slamming the trap door closed.

As she stood on top of the trap door hoping that they didn't start shooting, she looked around and realized that there wasn't anything heavy enough to place over the door to keep it shut. She knew that the batarians had just climbed 384 steps at least to get to her so they're strength was a little sapped but they would gain it back soon enough. Shepard crouched down, putting her hand over her ears as the bell continued to ring, causing her teeth to vibrate. As if the batarians had a hydraulic lift, the trap door was pushed open with such force that Shepard was thrown up and over against the stone half wall. She cried out in pain as the batarians began to crawl up and into the belfry.

Shepard pushed away from the wall and as the second batarian was pulling himself up, she pulled out her pistol and shot the first batarian in the chest. Before she could turn on the second batarian, he had hit her in the face knocking her back against the wall and as she struggled to get her footing he was on her, grabbing her by the throat. She began trying to claw out his eyes as she felt her throat closing and she could feel herself getting light headed. Just as she was about to lose consciousness she heard the batarian cry out in pain and let her go. As she slid to the ground she looked up to see an arrow sticking through his shoulder as he turned and began beating on the young boy of the woman who had opposed her using the children.

Shepard struggled to her feet and halfway up she heard a popping and saw the third batarian halfway in with his pistol aimed at her. She used all her remaining strength and slammed the trap door on him, catching him by the neck. She heard a snapping sound and as she slammed down again her left shoulder felt like it had been hit with a bat. Thinking that she must have twisted it she looked up to see the young boy being lifted by the batarian who was carrying him towards the opening. Shepard quickly found her pistol and shot the batarian three times in the back as he tossed the boy over the side.

The batarian hit the floor and Shepard raced to the half-wall and looked down. The boy was hanging from a gargoyle just two feet down. "You okay, boy?"

He looked up, scared and shook his head yes. Just then they both turned towards the batarian's deathbed as bombs began to explode. The Alliance had taken control and were now bombarding the enemy. Shepard and the boy let out a holler each and Shepard reached over the side with her left hand, "Let's go help finish this dance!" she had said over the explosions.

"Yes ma'am!" The boy grinned as she lifted him up.

As the young man went to get his bow, Shepard felt nauseous and as her legs gave out she threw up. As she found herself on all fours she prayed that she would not fall flat on her vomit just below her. As she looked at it she saw blood mixed in and before she wondered if she had thrown that up as well she saw the dripping blood coming from her shoulder. She quickly fell on her side and rolled over on her back as everything began to fade. That third batarian had shot her and because of her adrenalin at the time, she hadn't realized it.

Just as she began to fall away she heard Sister Aquinata say, "Take a good look boy. You will be able to tell your children that you knew the woman who saved Elysium. You fought with a true hero." Shepard tried to argue that she was no hero but she had no strength to argue with the silhouette that she was looking at. The nun's silhouette was bouncing against the wall as the bombs and firefight lit up the sky. They had made it, they had held out until the Alliance could break through. Now all she wanted was to sleep.


	40. Monte Crystalis & Lavender Suite

Liara knew that her companion needed to sleep so she carefully got out of bed and softly moved away from her sleeping lover. She moved into the sitting room where she stood naked in front of the floor to ceiling window and wondered if she would ever be able to solve the mystery of the protheans. As the night light cast shadows in the room, Liara watched the snow falling on the frozen waters of the Midim'ah Lake as the strong winds pushed everything around. Quana was a cold planet not too far from Feros and was home to the Crystalis Resort. The resort was primarily an exclusive destination for the elite with one nine-star and three eight-star hotels, six Edesia rated restaurants, seven nightclubs, thirty plus high end clothing stores from asari to human designers and five casinos resulting in humans calling it Monte Crystalis. To come to this resort location one had to be either extremely wealthy, famous, or politically important.

Liara had been on the planet Quana in the Attican Beta for over six months, shortly after graduating from the Elibio Academy two and a half years early. She had hoped that her mother was proud of the accomplishment but the Matriarch had never commented on it in her communications. Now here she was on her first solo project. The planet was cold and frozen but it not only had the resort but also Prothean cities that were still in very good shape. The fact that the cities were reasonably intact meant that looters had come through many centuries prior and taken everything of value that they could lift. But they didn't … or should we say couldn't take the walls with paintings and other markings on them. Liara had arrived to capture these walls digitally and translate them. She had only seen about an eighth of the drawings, paintings and markings so far. Based on the past six month's slow progress, she realized that her initial estimation of a year was not accurate. She knew that she was looking at over two years easy. As she continued to look out at the storm she frowned at the thought of telling her cousin that it would take additional time. Sibila had been pushing her to move back to Illium and she had agreed after this project was completed.

The premier nine-star hotel in Crystalis was the Aikaterine, which was owned by the asari of the same name. She was simply called Aika by her family and was raised by her grandmother the Matriarch Livia, after her own mother, Vasalika, was killed in a shuttle accident off Thessia when she was only 6 years old. In the grand lobby her picture was front and center over the great fireplace and while it was known to take your breath away, it only hinted at her beauty. Her wealth afforded her to remain independent from her many suitors and even though she was a matron she preferred lovers without mating involved. It was said that her weakness at the moment was humans with fair complexions. She loved the way their skin appeared against hers as they pleasured each other and at the moment she was residing on Bekenstein with the famous female human violinist Liqiu Zhào.

When Aika heard from Tatiaria that Liara was working on Quana she had the Lavender suite prepped for Liara and reserved for her exclusive use while she was present on the planet. The two bedroom suite also had a sitting area and the best views of the Midim'ah Lake. Liara sent a thank you basket that contained some of the Matriarch's private stock of sitruuna leaves, as well as a bottle of mayngo. Benezia had brought Liara here on a few of their mother/daughter getaways and Liara had always loved the times here. This was one of the few places that she had her mother all to herself.

Liara heard Eveline move in her sleep in the other room and she returned to look at her. Eveline had come out to visit Liara and after spending a relaxing week together in the Aikaterine, Liara was ready to get back to work. It's not that she wanted to get back into her one-piece standard suit, sleep on hard cots or not have a morning massage to start the day … But she was ready to be alone again, staring at walls that were once touched by the protheans and hopefully in understanding what they had painted she would be that much closer to solving why they disappeared. She had seen a few markings that she thought may be from those that came before. It excited her to think that she might find proof that the protheans built their empire on the rubbles of another civilization. She knew that it was true but she needed hard evidence ... she would find it even if it took centuries.

Liara liked Eveline and her company, she was soft-spoken and there were no demands from her. They were both in the same phase of life and not as wild as some of their peers. Neither would even consider of working in a bar or running as a mercenary, but it is not that they looked down on those choices ... it's just that neither activities appealed to them. Liara was focused on protheans and art while Eveline was focused on biotics mixed with technology. Eveline was now an executive at Armali and had been dating a turian who was starting to put pressure on her to move in with him. She had told him that she was just a maiden but he didn't understand that she did not feel that type of exclusive connection … "I'm not in that part of my life yet." She had told him. She had come to Quana to not only share pleasures with Liara but to share her frustration and confusion with dating other species. "Why must they take physical pleasures as more than pleasure? It's not melding."

Liara told her that she had never been with another species, "I'm afraid that you need to talk to Siby. She has experience with turians, humans … and I am sure others that I don't know about."

Eveline shook her head, "I should follow your example … Only asari."

"Only maidens," Liara corrected. "Matrons also want to settle and mate."

"Oh, dear," Eveline frowned. "But to give up turians … No, I don't think that I could do it."

Liara laughed, "Yes … you and Siby should talk."

Eveline kissed her as they moved towards the bed, "When I return to Illium. But now, let us pleasure each other."

Now with Eveline content and asleep, Liara went to the dresser and quietly pulled out her citron colored silk draped tunic with its draped neckline, white V shaped lace undergarment and picked up her gold sandals then snuck off into the washroom where she took a long cold shower.

As the cold water made her relax, Liara's mind went back to her 100th Birthday celebration on Thessia. Her Theia Tatiaria had taken care of all the arrangements, in place of the Matriarch Benezia, and Sibila had accepted her request to be her monium. Liara had tried to be strong during the preparation and smiled when she was with Tatiaria and Sibila going over the details. On the day of her celebration, she tried so very hard to be a good strong daughter and not show her disappointment that her mother was not present. Tatiaria had informed everyone that the Matriarch Benezia was away on important T'Soni business but you could see the shock. A mother did not miss this day of adulthood.

* * *

There was a beautiful arrangement of gardenias in the center of the ballroom from the Matriarch to Liara, but she had a feeling that her Theia had done that. Liara had received a short e-mail from her mother that simply read;

DEAR LIARA,

ON THIS DAY YOU BECOME AN ADULT. ENJOY THIS DAY. KNOW THAT I AM THINKING OF YOU AND THAT I AM WITH YOU ON THIS DAY OF CELEBRATION. NOW CARRY YOURSELF LIKE A T'SONI. NO TEARS UNLESS THEY ARE OF JOY.

MOTHER

Liara tried to follow her mother's wishes as she moved around the party … she greeted guests with a smile and when they inquired about the Matriarch, Liara responded that she was unfortunately away on important business and could not attend. The guest would invariably say that they understood, comment on how important the Matriarch was and then kiss her on the cheek. But she knew that they were trying to not let her see their surprise. "What do you think Liara did to make the Matriarch show shame on her this way?" she overheard one guest ask a companion. With the absence of the Matriarch on this very important date, there was speculation on why Liara had been denied her presence. As the whispers grew stronger around Liara she felt the tears start to burn so she slipped away to her room.

In the safety of her room she hid away ashamed and in tears until Sibila appeared. She had come to inform her that she was being requested to pay her respects to her great-aunt Matriarch Livia.

"No," Liara had said muffled as her face was buried in her pillow.

"Li-Li!" Sibila scolded her as she pulled her up by the arm, "We have done this before if I remember … You will not dishonor-"

"Fine." Liara cut her off not wanting to be lectured. As she got up she saw the bracelet with the cross and put it on for comfort. She didn't know why but the gift from the human calmed her. "I just don't want to answer another question on where mother is."

"Fine," Sibila said as she touched the silver cross, "I'll punch anyone who asks. Okay?"

This caused Liara to giggle and push her cousin, "Theia would punish you."

"But I will if you ask," Sibila said more serious. "I want you to be happy today, Li-Li."

"I am," Liara hugged her. "You are here ... that makes me happy."

As Liara and Sibila made their way down the grand staircase and through the party to the place of honor in the great ballroom … there stood the Matriarch Benezia in front of her seat on a floor that was four steps higher than the dance floor. Liara saw her mother dressed in a yellow asari sheer robe speaking with Matriarch Livia and Tatiaria. Liara began to cry as she forgot all the rules and ran to her mother through the ballroom.

Benezia had hoped to arrive sooner but had been delayed by Saren and had to use her asari gifts to make Saren let her return to Thessia for a day. She had said that she needed to visit Thessia on business to ensure that "others do not start to question what we are doing." She did not want Saren to know her true reason, which was to see her daughter. She did not want to mention Liara to him, ever. She had then taken only her closest of confidantes with her to ensure that her true reason was hidden from him. Now as she stood in her place of honor she saw Liara's childlike display of affection as she ran through the crowd towards her and it made Benezia laugh as her own heart swelled with love for her daughter's open spirit.

"Oh, mother!" Liara said through her tears as she ran up the steps and threw her arms around the Matriarch's waist, burying her face in her neck. "You came!"

"Aren't you supposed to be an adult now?" Benezia had teased as she wrapped her arms around Liara as well. "Greeting me like a child … You must learn to act your age, Liara."

Liara began to cry harder and Benezia turned her and Liara away from the eyes of others ... As she held her closer she softly whispered, "There, there, Little Wing. Mother is here now … wipe your eyes and feel my grace."

Liara couldn't help but smile and tear up at the memory of that moment as the water washed the soap off her body. Remembering the time that she spent with her mother that day was pure bliss, but it was also the last time that she had seen her. Two years and the Matriarch had not been back to their home on Thessia or even in asari space that she was aware of. The T'Soni Estate had seemed empty without her mother or her followers moving about the great estate. But on that day, that glorious day, the house was full of people laughing, dancing, touching and celebrating. Shiala had danced with Liara and Sibila showed the two of them some of the latest dance moves from Illium. Benezia and Livia danced the ancient nectpir together which brought the room to a hushed reverence. The dance was one of their oldest that took centuries to master and was rarely mastered before an asari became a Matriarch. The dance was a celebration of water and fire, requiring two bodies and when performed perfectly could hypnotize other species watching it.

It was said in asari history that the dance was used against a species, no longer known, which had come to Thessia with the intent to conquer them. The species had claimed to come in peace and their true intention was discovered when an asari melded with the leader. She had been sent in to seduce for that purpose and after revealing what she had seen in his mind, a celebration of friendship was thrown by the asari. That very night's entertainment was Matriarchs dancing the nectpir completely nude and when the enemy was lulled into a drift of mind by the dance they were slaughtered. This was history that was kept among the asari, one of many secrets.

* * *

_What secrets are you keeping, mother? What are you up to?_ Liara thought as she turned off the water. What was really starting to concern Liara was that the Matriarch's communications were becoming less frequent. Vid-mails had stopped completely in the last four months and the e-mails that did come were cold, sharp, and short. They were also signed Benezia. Not the Matriarch. Not Mother. There were no hidden messages. No words of kindness. No words of grace. Nothing.

"Oh, Goddess … please keep mother safe," Liara whispered as she stepped out of the shower and got dressed.

Liara exited her hotel room and as she stuck the key card with the number 2183 into the door to secure it, she noticed that the door to 2185 was open as a female human was singing along to some song about playing funky music. The human's voice was not pleasant to Liara and as she turned to leave the human shouted, "Hey! Are you looking for someone?"

Liara shook her head no and proceeded to head down the hallway to the elevators. The human yelled something else as Liara continued on and as she picked up her pace she hoped that the human would go back to her awful singing. _Please, please do not follow me_, Liara thought.

The human had seen Liara the first day that she arrived and was instantly attracted to her. She had even told her friend later that evening at dinner that she had seen a "really cute asari" with the "cutest nose and the bluest-"

"Skin?" Her friend cut in.

"Eyes!" She had responded. "And her ass!"

She knew that she had to talk to the asari and was excited when she realized that they were staying next door. She had also seen that the asari was not alone but she had heard that the asari were not jealous or possessive so … she had to talk with her. It wasn't just sexual. Okay, truth be told it was … Liara's ass, almost visible now in her tunic, was very tempting and her legs inviting to the human, causing her to think what it would be like to bend the asari over. _Crap, what is it about you girl? _She thought as she grabbed her jacket and raced for the door.

Liara stepped into the glass elevator just as the human stepped out and ran towards her. Liara was not in the mood to deal with anyone, especially a human, so she ignored the cries to hold the elevator and let out a sigh as the human jammed her body in between the doors. "Whew! I thought I wasn't going to make it!"

Liara turned her back to the door and looked out at the winter storm as the glass elevator began to glide downwards, rocking on occasion with the wind and a human singing "Do you know where you're going to …?" over the elevator speaker softly. The human in the elevator with her kept looking over at her and finally broke the silence, "Hi! My name is Michelle Edgar of the Alliance." The human stuck out her hand and Liara looked at it confused and then looked up her. "Oh, I'm sorry … I forgot that your kind don't shake hands."

_My kind?_ Liara thought as she turned back to the window. _My kind, indeed_.

The human began to tell her that she and her friend had been at the Aikaterine for the past two days and that she was trying to cheer up her friend, who had just broken up with her boyfriend … "She was with the guy for over seven years and on her 25th birthday … he broke up with her. Can you believe that? On her birthday … Men!"

Liara began to adjust her tunic just a little lower and softly said, "Men". She didn't know what that really meant since humans were all one and the same to her but thought that if she agreed this Michelle Edgar of the Alliance would be quiet.

Michelle looked at Liara's ass again and smiled, "She's taking it pretty hard. You?"

Liara never realized how slow the elevator was until that moment. She turned far enough to her left to punch the L button a couple times hoping that it would spur it on a little faster. _Please hurry!_ Humans were considered to be one of the most openly curious of species and she was now seeing that first hand. "Me?"

Michelle moved a little closer, "Why are you here?"

Liara could not believe how nosey this creature was. "I am here for work," she answered as she moved away from her.

"Work? Uh, what type of work do you do? " Michelle looked out at the icy storm outside the elevator, "You in business with the abominable snowman out there?"

"Abonibale what?" Liara looked at her confused.

"Uh, nothing." She blushed as Liara looked in her eyes. _Shit, your eyes are sexy blue_, "So what do you do?"

"Prothean studies," Liara answered as she turned to punch the L again. _Hurry up._

"Prothean." Michelle repeated the word as she looked at Liara's ass. "Isn't that a mineral?"

Liara put her hand to her forehead as she closed her eyes, "Protheans are a species that pre-dates any of our-" Liara stopped as she saw the human's reflection. She was looking at Liara's ass still and it made her sigh. _I just couldn't stay in the suite_.

Edgar heard Liara sigh and realized that she had just been caught. Edgar looked up sheepishly, "Sorry. It's been awhile since I saw an ass … uh, well. I thought that you asari were … ugh! Sorry." _Great job there Michelle! _

Liara moved farther from her, hoping that she would not have to use her biotics. This was the first time that she had ever been alone with a human and it was making her nervous. The way she kept looking at her ass made her wonder what the human was thinking and what she would do to her ass if she had the power. _Oh, Siby, why aren't you here? You could give this human what she wants_.

Michelle realized that she had come on a little too strong and as she looked out at the raging storm she stole glances of Liara's reflection. _I bet you have a cute smile_, she couldn't help but think. Without looking at Liara she tried to change her tactic, "Well as I was saying, my friend is pretty heart-broken. Maybe if you have a friend … preferably a human male since my friend doesn't date asari." _Dammit, why do you keep messing up?_ Michelle cursed. There was something about this asari that was making her nervous. "I mean, maybe if you and a friend had time we could cheer her up? What are you doing tomorrow?"

Liara felt herself get a little offended that a human was turning her nose up at her species, but she tried to ignore that feeling. "I'll be gone in the morning." _Thank the Goddess_, she thought. As the elevator came to a stop on the third floor Liara stepped out and headed for the small private bar overlooking the frozen waters of Quana. An asari at the entrance of the bar Minoque saw Liara, gave a slight bow and allowed her in but stopped the human.

"You may not enter," The asari said to her. "This is an exclusive bar."

"I'm Operations Chief Michelle Edgar of the Alliance," She answered as she saw Liara go through the doors.

"No entrance," the asari answered.

"I believe that my friend is in there …" _God, still be in there!_ She thought to herself as she tried looking tough at the asari.

The asari looked Michelle Edgars up and down, "And who is this friend?"

"Alliance Staff Lieutenant Elizabeth Shepard."


	41. Elasa & Primrose Suite

"Lieutenant Shepard?" The asari hostess smiled as she placed a tumbler of alcohol in front of her, "This is for you."

Shepard looked at the tumbler filled with a pale green liquid, "What is this?"

"It's called Elasa," the hostess answered, "It's from Thessia. Drink it carefully."

"Thank you," Shepard said.

"It's not from me," She said almost in a soft whisper. The hostess pointed to a group of asari and as Shepard looked over she saw one of them raise her glass and smile. Shepard felt her stomach knot but returned the greeting out of politeness. _Frick! Please don't come over_, she thought.

The hostess pressed a little closer, a bit too close for Shepard, as she asked, "Shall I give her a message? Or is there something … or someone else that you may desire?"

"Message?" Shepard asked, pretending to have not heard the last remark. "Oh … tell her thank you. And can you have the lights dimmed in this area? I really don't want to be disturbed."

"As you wish." She smiled as she walked away swinging her hips just slightly.

The more contact that Shepard had with the asari, the more apparent it became that they found her attractive. She didn't know why, maybe because the feeling wasn't mutual and they sensed the potential chase? Or maybe her friend Ricky had put a curse on her … that thought always made her smile. _I haven't forgotten you, Rickster, so stop having the blue aliens hit on me. I'll find you. I promise_.

Shepard took a small sip of the drink which was both cold and sharp with a lingering aftertaste. _Interesting_, she thought as she put it down and pulled her own tumbler back to her. _But I'll stick to good old Irish whiskey_. As the lights in her area were dimmed she turned back to the massive window and looked at the storm. It matched how she felt inside … cold and alone. It had happened on her 25th birthday at her grandparents. Shepard had taken two weeks off from the Alliance and had met Manny in Savannah where they rented a car and drove to her grandparents. Shepard had sensed a distance between them but that was normal during the first couple days they were first back together. It was funny how time apart always made them feel a little like strangers when they came back together. But this time was different; Their sex was a little off ... he seemed torn as she slid on top of him ... he was also disappearing throughout the week, making phone calls away from her and being evasive when she asked who he was talking to.

To be fair, they had spent little time together over the past few years. She was always on an Alliance ship just seeing him for a few weeks every four to six months. He had begged her to not extend her service but she did just that ... six months prior to her birthday. She added another six years of commitment to the Alliance instead of returning to San Antonio full-time and committing to Manny in marriage. When she told him just a few weeks later during their Spanish vacation on the beach in Alicante, he had slammed his fist into the wall of their hotel room. As his fist tore through the wall the tourists in the next room could be heard yelling in Russian.

"Manny!" She had known that he would be upset but this was not what she expected.

He punched the wall again as tears filled his eyes, "Why?"

Shepard grabbed him by the arm as he punched the wall again, "Please stop!"

Manny hit the wall once more and then grabbed his fist, "I don't understand."

Shepard tried turning him to face her but he was like a bull. He would turn only when he was ready. "Please Manny! You know that I have to do this."

"No Shepard, I don't." He said as he finally turned to face her. "What I know is that I have waited and been understanding … and patient … and … stupid!"

Shepard stepped closer to him, pulling up on her tippy toes to get closer to his face. "Manny, I know. I'm sorry. But Ricky … I told you that my friend needs me."

Manny forcefully pushed Shepard to the bed and as she fell backwards he crawled on top of her, pushing her legs apart. "I need you! I'm a man, not a boy. I can't keep going months without …" Manny leaned on his left arm to keep his full weight off her as he reached down between them past her underwear "… without this." On the word _this _she felt his hand press against her as a finger slid inside.

"No!" She said in anger as she grabbed his wrist to try and remove his hand.

"What, Shepard?" Manny asked with tears in his eyes as he pressed harder, "You don't want me? Is that it? Are you spreading your legs for someone else? Some guy on your ship? Is that how you can go months without seeing me? Have you made me your woman?"

Shepard felt him shift as he tried unzipping and it made her start to panic, "Not again! Please Manny stop … I can't have this happen again. Not with you. You aren't like them … Please! Please don't ... don't do this."

The words, her pleas broke through his anger and he stopped. Had he not been so angry he might have heard her words clearly but all he heard were her pleas to stop. He rolled over onto his back, arm thrown over his eyes as he cried. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Shepard. I never … Jesucristo! What is happening to us?" he choked out through his pain.

Shepard turned on her side facing him and as she pulled her knees up to her breasts she felt shame. Not at what he had done but at what she had done. He was right. She had taken occasional lovers through the years, though none ever on the ship she was assigned, and she had assumed that he had as well_. Don't lie to yourself_, she thought as she reached out and softly took his arm. _You have always known that Manny is faithful. He's like dad … a good man_.

Manny's eyes were closed as Shepard carefully moved closer to him and whispered, "Manny, I didn't mean to hurt you … I can't explain why I just couldn't finish the next year and walk away."

Manny opened his eyes and looked at her, "I can't keep living like this. I feel like a part of my life … the biggest part is always on hold. I worry about you out there, I hate that the house is empty and the worst part is …" Manny stopped.

"What?" Shepard asked as she began running her fingers through his dark hair.

"I love you."

Shepard rose up, "That's the worst part?"

Manny put his hand on her face and stroked her cheek with his thumb, "It is when I know that you don't love me back."

"Manny … I … I"

"I know … okay, Shepard." He quieted her with a kiss. As his head fell back down on the bed she started to argue with him but he cut her off again, "No Shepard. I've always known that you weren't in love with me … but I have always hoped that you would one day."

Less than a year later and he left her. And it hurt. The night of her birthday party he had wandered outside to make yet another call. Shepard quietly snuck up on him and heard him talking about seeing a doctor, ultrasound and trimester. Her stomach dropped and she caught her breath. Manny turned around, told the person on the other line that he had to go and stammered, "Shepard. How long have you been there?"

"Ultrasound?" Shepard stepped closer to him. "Manny, trimester?"

"It was an accident Shepard," he answered as he reached out to her, "I'm going to fix this."

"Fix this?" Shepard could hear herself yelling.

Manny tried to tell her that he had gotten drunk one night and slept with one of the girls in his main office. She was just three months along and he was trying to do the "right thing. I can't let her do this alone Shepard … it's my …"

"Baby." Shepard finished for him as tears of anger began to fall. Before she knew what she was doing she was punching on him. Manny tried defending himself without hurting her but Shepard was quick and hitting him in places that hurt. He yelled for her to stop as the family hearing the commotion came outside. Manny had a bloody nose and scratches on his face as he tried grabbing Shepard. She dodged his hands and with a kick to his stomach sent him off the porch.

She was about to continue after him when her cousins, Aaron and Timmy, held her back. "That's enough, Lil'bit!" Grandma Elizabeth said firmly while Grandpa Jack helped Manny up and made sure that his nose wasn't broken.

"I'll kick his ass," Aunt Toni said as she took her son Timmy's place, "But you have to calm down."

As Manny, bruised and bloodied, apologized to everyone for upsetting the party, Shepard was on her knees dry heaving and crying. Her Aunt Mel pushed everyone away and began to try and calm her down. Shepard still couldn't catch her breath so Mel tried to do what she saw Hannah do once with Shepard years past. "It's okay Whisper. Just breath … Everything is going to be fine. I'm here now. Breath." Shepard hearing her middle name fell into her Aunt's arms crying while still struggling to breath. When she had fallen asleep out of exhaustion on the porch in her Aunt's arms, Mel asked Manny to carry "Lil'bit to bed."

When Shepard had awakened the next morning with a pounding head she was told that Manny had left late last night after leaving a letter for her.

SHEPARD,

I DID NOT MEAN FOR ANY OF THIS TO HAPPEN. BUT I AM ONLY HUMAN. IT WOULD BE BEST IF WE TOOK A BREAK FOR NOW WHILE I WORK THROUGH THINGS. YOU HAVE YOUR LIFE IN THE ALLIANCE AND I HAVE MY LIFE IN SAN ANTONIO. MAYBE AFTER YOU HAVE DONE WHAT IT IS YOU THINK THAT YOU NEED TO DO, WE CAN TRY AGAIN. JUST KNOW THAT I NEVER CHEATED UNTIL THAT DRUNKEN NIGHT. I DO NOT WANT TO BE WITH HER BUT WITH YOU.

I LOVE YOU.

MANNY

She had wanted to hate him, to act the victim … but she knew that she was just as much to blame as he was. She had ignored his needs and she herself hadn't been faithful either. She had left him alone while she did what she wanted … how she could expect him to just wait? She knew that she had always put him second to what she wanted. And now she was reaping what she had sown. It hurt to think of some other woman having his child but there it was. Manny was going to be a father with another woman ... not her. She may not be in love with him but she did care deeply about him and she needed him. She needed to know that he was there when she reached out for him. That was probably the cruelest part to her; he had recognized that she didn't truly love him.

But he had been her rock, especially after Elysium when life became a blur. The Alliance and politicians paraded her around for over six months and then the lawsuits started. With the lawsuits came the talking heads and the armchair quarterbacks who dissected the events and explained how they would have handled fighting in the blitz differently. How they would have been able to save more people. But most importantly, they talked about how they would have fought without bringing in children. A handful of reporters, politicians and individuals on Earth began calling her "the butcher of children" and saying that all the children that died under her command was on her head. That had torn at her. She could see all those LOTF team members and she remembered every one of them that was killed. Manny may not have known what to say like her grandmother or Aunt Mel, but his arms were worth a thousand words. After days spent in court seeing pictures of the dead, hearing the prosecution tell the jurors that Staff Lieutenant Lezeu Moldovan had failed in his command when he stepped aside and let ill-equipped Alliance Naval Operations Chief Elizabeth Shepard lead. How she had used the children where men should have been used, even suggesting that she used small children as shields … As they created lies and exaggerated events to fit their narrative, Manny was her lifeboat. He believed in her and when they would return to the hotel he would draw her bubble bath, then while she bathed he would wash her back and tell her things that were light-hearted and then make her eat dinner.

The woman that started the lawsuits was the same woman who had confronted her on Elysium. Tawny Hillard and her son, Nathan Hillard, had survived but not her husband, Tom. His charred body had been found behind enemy lines and no one could explain how he ended up there. At the trial Shepard had seen young Nathan look at her countless times, wanting to tell her that he was sorry. On the stand all he would say was that "Chief Shepard is a hero." In fact, all the LOTF kids said that and the majority of the adults. But lawsuits meant easy money to some individuals. Shepard knew that it was the money that drove Hillard, but she looked at some of the others and saw pain and grief. They needed someone to pay and since the true leaders of the blitz would never be held accountable their rage turned on her. She understood their pain as it mirrored Mindoir … She didn't hate them, she only felt empathy.

Two years Shepard went from patrolling the Skyllian Verge to courthouses in Geneva … back and forth she went. After the last court date she didn't have time to celebrate though, not that she would have, but she was sent straight to the Arcturus Station and the N7 program training.

The Alliance had from day one called her a hero and she had been awarded 26 Alliance awards for her heroism, injuries and combat. All of it was humbling and Shepard felt unworthy to receive them. But when she received word that she was being awarded The Star of Terra she was speechless. As the medal was awarded to her by Admiral Claudette Varus, the mother of Major Dander Varus, she thought of those six days and the brave men, women and children who had fought by her side or contributed in other ways and it brought tears to her eyes. That medal belonged to all of them ... not just her.

Admiral Varus saw that Shepard was holding back tears and as she went to kiss her cheeks whispered, "It's okay Lieutenant … you've earned the right to those tears." Admiral Varus had become Shepard's biggest defender after learning how the young woman had taken revenge for her only child's death. She had been the one responsible for Shepard becoming a Staff Lieutenant even when others complained that she was just an NCO. With the assistance of her friend and fellow Admiral, Steven Hackett, the promotion went through but not without strings. Shepard would have to go through the N7 training and graduate within the top three. Varus had wanted to reject that requirement but Hackett had made her see that Shepard becoming an N7 was to Shepard's best advantage within the Alliance.

"But the top three," Varus had argued, "When have you ever heard of a woman graduating within the top three? The highest a female recruit has made it is number six … No, I won't agree to that."

Hackett shook his head, "Claudy, there is something about her … something driving her. I wouldn't be surprised if she graduates at the very top."

Admiral Varus had also assigned her personal attorneys to represent Shepard in the civilian cases so that it would not crush Shepard financially. "These greedy son-of-a-bitches aren't going to crush the kid," She had told Hackett.

But all of that was over now. The trials, the parades, the N7 training … and Manny.

Shepard was scheduled to return to the SSV Madrid, a cruiser in the Fifth Fleet, after her two week vacation. Shepard had broken into her piggy bank and splurged on this trip, "I need to go somewhere and be pampered." She had told Michelle as they drank coffee on the Arcturus Station**. **Both of their assigned ships had docked for two days there and they were glad to be able to catch up.

"One word … Aikaterine." Michelle said. She had told Shepard that she had read about the hotel in a travel magazine but that it was pretty pricey. Shepard heard her talk about the spa, the food and the entertainment and there she was … sitting in a private bar drinking Irish whiskey and watching a winter storm. When they arrived and were led to a two bedroom suite, called the Primrose Suite, Shepard had returned to the lobby and said that she had been placed in the wrong room. She had reserved a single room and when she saw the suite knew that it would cost two years at least of her pay in the Alliance.

"No mistake," the asari smiled. "The Primrose Suite is registered to you Lieutenant Shepard. Compliments of the Aikaterine management for your bravery on Elysium."

Shepard didn't even know that the asari were aware of the Skyllian Blitz. "I see. That is too kind though … a single room is fine."

The asari smiled, "Please, it would honor us to have you at your most comfortable while staying here at the Aikaterine. You also have been given access to the Minoque found on this floor just around the corner to your right."

"The Minoque?" Shepard asked.

"Yes. It is a very private club that Mistress Aikaterine personally designed and has some of the best views of the Midim'ah Lake ... just asthe Primrose does. There are baccarat tables, fine spirits from around the galaxy, the singer Langston and companionship if you choose not to be alone for the evening."

"I see," Shepard said. "Well, thank you."

So here she sat in the darkness of an exclusive place looking out at a frozen lake, whiskey in hand and an asari instrument called onai that closely resembed and sounded like a piano playing softly in the background. She pulled out her mother's old prothean jewelry piece that her Aunt Mel had given back to her the day after her birthday. She had told her Aunt to keep it but Mel had insisted that she take it with her. "You can give it back to me next time you are here … but for now, keep it with you. It's your good luck charm." _Good luck charm_, Shepard smiled as she rubbed on it. She had found that it worked well as a worry rock with the unique design feeling pleasing against her thumb.

"Excuse me," She heard behind her, "Would you mind terribly if I sat with you?"

Shepard looked up and saw an asari looking down at her.


	42. The Minoque Masquerade

Shepard smiled at the asari, "No … please, have a seat." _Frick! Stay calm. Just smile and be polite_.

"My name is Ismene … Ismene Dantium." She said as she ran her finger over the rim of the glass with Elasa. "Did you not like the taste of asari … I mean Elasa?"

Shepard felt herself blush at the comment as she pulled her dress hem a little lower over her legs. "No … It tasted …I mean ... it .." _Crap, what the hell is it about asari that make me so tense and … uncomfortable_? Shepard thought to herself as she remembered that other asari on Illium. They had a way of being so direct not only in their sexual intent but also in their gaze. Mix that with their height, fluid movement and asari head and skin color … it was like looking into the face of a flared cobra to her. Not the actual look but the feeling that it gave her. _Get a grip, dammit_. "it … it was fine. I just prefer my whiskey."

_You will prefer me after this night_, Ismene thought as she took Shepard's tumbler and brought it slowly to her own lips. Ismene Dantium was the daughter of the soon to be Matriarch Vyka Dantium, while her mother's choice to mate with was a batarian, Kronol El' Grǣdig. Ismene was just over three hundred years old and was the youngest of Vyka's daughters. Ismene and her two sisters had grown up very privileged, pampered and spoiled by their mother. The daughters were never told no by anyone in the Dantium Estate and given everything that they desired which left them selfish and very hedonstic. Ismene's oldest sister died on Omega, where she was last seen having a tantrum in a club called Afterlife. This death impacted all of them ... Ismene became more wild while her other sister, who was an Eclipse mercenary at the time gave that life up and was now following the Matriarch Aleta. Her mother had used her financial and social position over the years to get her daughters out of trouble and after the oldest daughter's death Vyka became even more the slave to her youngest daughter's desires.

And tonight ... Shepard was Ismene's desire. She had seen Shepard the moment she entered the bar and once she had a brief bio of the Alliance Officer she had a drink sent over. "Hmmm, a human warrior … she will taste me tonight," Imense had said to those at her table as she lifted her glass to Shepard. "And I will taste her."

When the human had taken a sip and then went back to her own drink it gave a slight offense to her … Then when the lights were lowered, a message of just "thank you" delivered and the human continued to sit looking out at the ice storm and not coming to her … "Who does she think that she is?"

"Forget her," one of her sycophantic companions said. "You can have anyone you want."

"Of course I can," she said as she took a drink of Elasa. "And I want her."

"Then you will have her," one of her other companions said ... adding, "And if you require an additional body ... please honor me. She seems quite pleasing to look at.

_Yes, I will have her and she will pay ... at least a little for this snub_, she thought as she ignored the offer, took another sip and looked at Shepard's shadow._ A sweet punishment ... a little pain with her pleasure_.

* * *

Liara had taken a seat at the bar and ordered a glass of Elasa when she first arrived which was just after Ismene went to Shepard. A skyball game was being played on the two screens to each side of the bar and it made Liara smile. The game was between her team Serrice Delphinus and the Archelaus Minars ... Seeing her team she couldn't help but think of Zazzy and her smile got bigger. The grin was a combination at both the thought of him and the fact that their team was ahead by six points. As her favorite player on the team had the ball Liara realized how focused that she had been on her work because she had no idea how her team was doing ... at all.

"Excuse me," Liara waved the bartender over, "How is the Delphinus doing this season?"

The bartender looked up at the screen, "They are at the number two spot."

Liara frowned, "Who is in the top position?"

"The Minars," she answered as she dried a martini glass, "But by the looks of it the positions may reverse after this game."

That brought a smile back to Liara's face, "Thank you."

"Would you like something to eat?" The bartender inquired. Normally she wouldn't offer but she knew who Liara was, knew that she was the cousin of the owner and also liked her manners. Anytime that she came in she was polite, soft-spoken and tipped very well. That was one area that Liara was not miserly if the service warranted. "I can have the kitchen opened, Dr. T'Soni."

"Oh, no thank you." Liara answered. "It is quiet in here tonight."

"It normally is when the singer Langston is off," the bartender replied. "It's a nice change."

"Yes, it is." Liara smiled. Liara and Eveline had been in the bar on a few of the nights that the asari sang and it was standing room only. Liara loved to hear her sing but in all honesty she was grateful that the bar was fairly empty when she arrived. There were two salarians and an asari playing baccarat to the right of the room, five asari at a table to her left and a couple sitting at a table. She could see the asari but the human was tucked safely in shadows and her face hidden in the dark as the lights in that area had been dimmed.

The hostess dropped a tray of empty glasses on the bar to the left of Liara as she ordered two wet martinis, an Elasa and "another whiskey for the human."

The bartender looked towards the shadow figure, "What is she like?"

"Quiet," The hostess answered. "She isn't what I expected."

"No?" The bartender responded as she put the glasses in the sink and turned to make the martinis.

"She is polite and very soft spoken," The hostess said. "Lovely in fact ..." The hostess looked up at the screen and asked Liara, "What is the score?"

Liara without looking away from the game told her and when the hostess heard that Serrice was ahead gave a small cheer. Liara then turned and smiled at her, "I can't believe that the Minars are in top position."

The hostess agreed as the bartender placed the two wet martinis on the tray, "The other teams that they played had off games … pure luck."

"Well whatever it is," the hostess said, "It ends in this match."

The bartender and Liara agreed.

"I see that the human has captured Ismene's attention," The bartender said.

The hostess looked over and saw her with the human.

"Mine too," the hostess frowned as she started putting napkins on her tray, "She is pleasing to look at, but if Ismene wants her ... she will get her."

"True," the bartender said as she placed the Elasa and whiskey on the tray. "To be honest, she does have something pleasing about her."

"Ismene?" The hostess asked. "I didn-"

"No!" The bartender stopped her. "The human."

Liara sighed; _I have a human they can have if she shows up_.

"That's surprising for you." The hostess lifted the tray, "Well back to work."

"Did you have to turn the lights down?" The bartender joked as she began to wash the glasses.

The hostess laughed, "Sorry, but she asked. I'm a slave to humans with green eyes."

* * *

As Ismene had approached the Alliance Officer she couldn't help but look at her long legs and wonder if they were as strong as they appeared. Now that she had seen them up close and caught the scent of Shepard ... exquisite. The things that she planned for them would require the human to have strong legs ... very strong legs.

After tasting Shepard's whiskey, "Mmmm, this does taste quite strong," Ismene said. "I should be careful and not get drunk. You might try and take advantage."

Shepard looked at her tumbler as Ismene placed it back in front of her. _Nope. No more for me tonight … at least not here_. "Please, just drink it." Shepard said as she slid it back to her.

Ismene looked at Shepard, thought of where she would like her lips to be and smiled, "So you know my name … what is yours?"

Shepard looked at the teasing way the asari was touching the whiskey glass with her finger and her stomach began to tighten. "Shepard."

"Just Shepard?" Ismene teased.

"Just Shepard."

Ismene dipped her middle finger in the drink and as Shepard watched she placed it on her tongue and then smiled. "Well, Shepard … you have beautiful lips."

Shepard couldn't help but think of her Aunt Toni picking on her father's "plush lips" and she smiled.

_Flattery always gets the humans_, Ismene thought as she misunderstood the smile.

* * *

"Look, just ask Lieutenant Shepard … I'm here with her," Michelle Edgars said.

"I'm sorry, but we do not bother our guests once they are in The Minoque," the asari said.

"Dammit! She's my friend!" Michelle began to yell.

The asari stepped forward and said, "Please keep your voice down. If she is your friend then you should have a way to contact her. Call her and have her come out here."

Shepard had left her omni-tool in the hotel room when she had walked down to the bar. "Please let me in! I told you that she left her omni-tool in our room and … and … sweet mary could you just go ask her if she knows me? Chief Michelle Edgar."

The asari shook her head no as two asari commandos approached, "I'm sorry Chief Edgar, but I must ask you to leave this area or I will have you escorted away. There is nothing that I can do for you."

Michelle looked at the turians and back at the bar entrance. _Seriously?_ She thought. _The love of my life … the ass that speaks my name is in there and you forget your omni-tool? Damn you Shepard!_

* * *

_Damn you Michelle_, Shepard thought as Ismene shifted closer.

"So, are you here alone?" Ismene asked.

"Alone? ... Why, uh, no. No I'm not." Shepard stumbled out. _Michelle where are you when I need you_? "She should be here any moment in fact."

"She?" Ismene loved nothing more than to take someone from another person. She enjoyed the victory more if it was another asari but any competition was fun to her. "And where is this she?"

"On her way," Shepard said as Ismene shifted closer. Too close for Shepard. _Michelle! Dammit_!

"Perhaps you can forget her for the night," she pressed as her hand slid across Shepard's breast.

Shepard jerked as she felt the asari's hand press against her and quickly jumped up grateful that it had not touched her skin, "I'm sorry but I need to go to the ladies room."

Ismene looked up at Shepard and smiled, "Of course." As Shepard turned to go Ismene got up as well, "I think I might join you."

Ismene at 6'6" was 9" taller than Shepard and with her 4" heels she towered over her at 13". This was another area that always made Shepard cringe ... the asari were a tall species with the average height being 6'5" ... not as tall as krogans but equal to the turians. Shepard felt her throat tighten at the thought of being alone with the asari and went back to her table, "You know, I'll just wait here … I didn't realize what time it was and she should be here any moment." _Or I am going to kill her_.

"But don't you have to relieve yourself?" Ismene asked as she looked between Shepard's legs and smiled.

"No ... I don't really have to go." Shepard forced out. The look made Shepard feel as if the asari had actually reached between her legs, the look was so direct and forceful.

Ismene wanted nothing more than to have Shepard alone but she had another plan, "I'd like to buy you a drink on my way back."

Shepard shook her head, "That's not really needed. I was about to order a cup of coffee … I think I've had enough to drink." _I don't want to lose control or god forbid consciousness with you around_.

"Coffee?" Ismene purred. "I love coffee … I'll have a cup sent over."

Ismene loved how this human wasn't so quick to be with her and she loved it even more that the human had no idea who she was. It made her want her more. _You will be mine tonight human! The pain and pleasure that I have in store for you. Mmmm._ She grinned as she went to the bar and snapped for the bartender, "Send another glass of Elasa for me and a cup of kaffee for the human to our table."

"Kaffee?" The bartender asked.

"Kaffee," she said coldly, "Don't make me repeat myself again."

"We … uh, we don't serve humans kaffee." She answered as she pulled down a cup. "But we do have Earth coffee … that's what you really want isn't it?"

Ismene stepped closer to the bar, eyes narrowed and clipped out, "Kaffee. Thessian Kaffee. Now. Hear. That. Understand. That. Kaffee."

Liara had just returned from the washroom when she heard the exchange between Ismene and the bartender about serving the human Kaffee. Liara looked over at the human lost in the shadows and the thought of her being used by a Dantium angered her. The daughters of Vyka Dantium and their unscrupulous behaviors were known throughout Thessia and Liara was not about to let one of them take advantage of anyone … even if it was a human.

Liara walked up behind Ismene and said, "Of course she meant coffee … not kaffee."

Ismene turned to look at Liara, "Who do you think that you are intruding into my business?" She demanded with venom. "Why are you … oh, I see. You are with her, aren't you?" Ismene laughed as she looked Liara up and down, "Well, you are no match for me ... maiden."

Liara ignored Ismene and said to the bartender, "No kaffee is to be served to the human."

Ismene's eyes narrowed as she stood closer to Liara who was standing 8" shorter than her with just her sandals on, "Uhm, you are a maiden! How rich ... and such a waste," she laughed as she looked over towards Shepard and back ... "You are still a child trying to be a matron ... Oh, how sad. You do not have the skills to please anything yet ... not yourself and especially not someone like her. She should experience the touch of a true asari ... not a child pretending to be. You might as well walk away and leave her to someone that knows how to please … after all, the human will tire of you soon enough."

Liara could feel the heat in her face as the asari continued to laugh, "I am not a child and I will not allow you to seduce a human with kaffee … at least not while I am here."

Ismene stepped closer, "You won't allow it? You? You do know that I am Ismene Dantium, daughter of Vyka Dantium?"

"Oh, I know who you are," Liara answered. "The question is do you know who I am?"

Ismene smile faded just slightly as she looked Liara up and down, "I thought we established that you are the human's pathetic and ill-equiped companion ... someone who cannot please her as I could. A cheap ... inadequate perioikos asari."

Liara's biotics flared as she said with ice, "I am Liara T'Soni, daughter of the Matriarch Benezia of Armali."

Ismene's smile and attitude disappeared at the mention of the Matriarch Benezia ... she was revered by her own mother as well as the favored cousin of Aikaterine. Ismene knew in that very moment that the asari in front of her had the power to have her removed from the hotel and the elite guest lists in the asari world. Liara was part of the Corallium Circle ... from the line of Cerelia. She was everything that Ismene would kill to be ... "I really wasn't going to let her drink it," she smiled, trying to manuever her way out of this horrid moment.

"I didn't think so," Liara said without a smile.

"Well, I didn't realize that the Matriarch's daughter was seeing a human. But looking at her I can see that you two are a perfect match … Maybe you and I could share her … together we could show her what true pleasure can be found between a human and asari … or you could leave her to sleep tonight and I could please you in the Blue Rose Penthouse."

"Your offer is kind," Liara answered, following the false nature of the conversation. She knew that Ismene would have wielded her social standing over her if she had been able to but Liara's family name trumped hers. Even so, Liara knew that it would be more advantageous to her down the road to let Ismene keep her pride then strip her of it. "But my … uh, lover is an insecure human." _By the Goddess, I can't believe that I just said that_.

"Of course," Ismene gave a slight laugh. "But by the look of her it can be tolerated."

Liara looked over at the human and wished that she could at least see what all the fuss was about but the darkness still kept her imprisoned. "Now, if you wouldn't mind I need to get me … er, her and I drinks."

"Of course, she wanted coffee," she said. "But can I ask you something?"

Liara wanted to say no but ... "Yes."

"What does she taste like?"

_Oh, by the Goddess_! Liara looked over at the shadow, took a breath and said, "Like mayngo."

Ismene caught her breath at the thought and wished that her family position had given her the power to take Shepard that night ... But Liara was a T'Soni. _One day, bitch_! "Do you mind if I give her my best wishes before I leave?"

"Of course not," Liara answered with a smile and tilt of her head. _Please don't mention me_.

As Ismene walked back to Shepard she was seething. _Damn bitch! Shepard should be with a matron not some inexperienced maiden_. Liara ducked behind plants to ensure that she was not pointed out.

Ismene could smell Shepard's perfume as she stood next to her and the scent along with her legs were almost too much. "Shepard, I'm sorry … I didn't realize who you were with."

"Sorry?" Shepard said with a start ... Asari moved much too quiet for her and this one made her really nervous.

"Your lover," Ismene said. "Impressive catch … I am sure that she must spoil you ... I would love to stay and have drinks with both of you but I have to leave. Maybe in the future we three could … well, you know."

"My lover?" Shepard was confused … _Oh, Michelle must have made it in the bar … thank Bacchus_. "Oh, yes ... my lover. Where is she?"

"Getting you two drinks," she answered, as Shepard stood and looked over in the direction of the bar. All Shepard could see was the bartender and the hostess … no Michelle or anyone else. "Well, goodbye Shepard ... until we meet again. And we will."

"Oh, goodbye." Shepard said as Ismene gave one more look at her legs, "It was a pleasure meeting you." _And seeing you leave_.

Shepard watched her walk away as she sat back down confused. _What the hell was that all about and where is Michelle? _


	43. Icy Pirouettes

Shepard knew that Michelle, along with Private Seaborg, was just a few paces behind her but it made her nervous not having them closer. Shepard had climbed Mt. Kilimanjaro with a few Alliance soldiers for charity just a year prior which had made her contemplate trying Mt. Everest. But after reading about the death zone she had scratched it off her list of things to do. For the past half hour that they had been slowly climbing up the mountain all she could think about was the death zone. _Stop it Shepard_, she thought to herself as she moved over a small crevice. _This is not Everest_.

She knew that they had been moving slow but she was disheartened as she looked at her omni-tool and realized that they were no more than a quarter mile from where they started. The air was thin on the planet and the temperature so cold that without their suits on, frostbite was just ten minutes away. Breathing, even with oxygen, seemed a little more labored and walking was just one step at a time. It was hard to believe that just four hours earlier, Shepard had been drinking coffee and reading "A Pocket Full of Rye" on the SS Madrid as it patrolled the Tereshkova System.

As she turned the page to follow Miss Marple on her case she was requested to the bridge. A distress signal from a small unidentified turian cruiser that had gone down on the planet Antibaar had just been detected. Captain Tanner instructed Shepard, his 1st Lieutenant, to take a three man crew to check it out but with strict instructions to abort if the storm proved too dangerous to proceed. The storm had been captured on the NESIS and was moving quickly towards the crash site so Shepard knew that they had limited time to get there and help the survivors, if there were any.

She had chosen Chief Michelle Edgars, Private Seaborg and Corporal Ludlaw. The Corporal was the best Mako driver that she had ever met and one of the most gifted techs. They had been serving together for over four years and also sharing a two bedroom apartment together on the Arcturus Station for the past three years. He was introverted and in his downtime on the ship he preferred spending it researching, documenting and hunting coins for his coin collection or chatting with Captain Tanner who was a fellow birdwatcher. Michelle had hinted at Shepard about the two sharing a place now that they were on the same cruiser. But Shepard liked Luddy's calm personality and shared love of quiet when at home. This created tension between the Corporal and Chief, tension that Shepard was constantly trying to defuse between her two friends.

As Corporal Ludlaw maneuvered the Mako around the rocks and began climbing the steep mountainside towards the signal it became apparent that they would need to go the rest of the way on foot. The ship had landed almost three quarters of the way up a steep and rocky mountain.

"Shit! Tell me that you can drive over those boulders and up that steep grade," Michelle said as they came to a stop.

"Unfortunately this baby can't go any farther," Luddy groaned as he looked over at Shepard, "Sorry Shepard."

"That's alright, Luddy." Shepard smiled, "No one else could have gotten us this close. Michelle, Seaborg … suit up. Luddy, I need you to stay here and monitor the signal. If you see anything change let me know asap."

"But Shepard," Luddy said as he swung his seat around to face her, "I can hook up my omni to the readouts and go with the team."

"You could … but I need you here." Shepard said as she patted him on the shoulder, "If something should go wrong I need to know we have someone closer than the Madrid but not in the same ditch."

"Yes, ma'am." He answered watching her and the other two pulling on their gear.

"Let me carry the DX emergency pack," Shepard said to Seaborg. The pack was an emergency pack that was specifically designed for the dextro-protein races, specifically the Turians and Quarians, in rescue situations. The pack added another 18.2 lbs on Shepard but she wanted to make sure that nothing happened to it in the climb. Seaborg was a good soldier who was also an amateur mountain climber in his spare time but Shepard knew that he had never been off-world for very long. The last thing that she wanted was to have him panic and in the process lose the pack.

"Yes ma'am." Seaborg said without a fight as he took the pack off.

Shepard, Michelle and Seaborg left Luddy in the Mako and in the midst of the ice storm began their climb. "Stay close," she had instructed her team. "None of us can afford to get lost out here."

Now here it was a half hour later and no more than a quarter mile from where they started. As Shepard crossed over a cluster of rocks she called out to Michelle, "Hey Chief?"

"Shepard?" Michelle answered.

"Remember how I said that I knocked Everest off of my list of things to do?"

Michelle laughed, "Everest sounds pretty easy at the moment."

"Yes ... Yes it does," Shepard laughed with her. "I might just add it back on …"

"You know you're crazy, right?" Michelle interrupted her. "Why don't you just run with the bulls or dive off the cliffs in Mexico? Oh wait, you did those things!"

"Lieutenant?" Seaborg cut in, "You ran with the bulls? Really?"

"Just once ... I blame it on the sangria," Shepard answered as she carefully crossed a three-foot crevice. "Be careful guys, I'm running into larger crevices up here and there are pockets of ice that make it challenging … unless you are looking to slide down the hill."

"Oh, that sounds like fun," Michelle said jokingly, "I'll be right there!"

They knew that the storm was forecasted to get worse and now it had done just that as they passed the halfway mark. Visibility already limited had decreased even more and now they could see no farther than nine feet in all directions. The wind also picked up strength and the team was finding it hard to stay upright as it pushed hard against them. Well as upright as you can be at 39 to 50 degree angles.

Shepard could see the crash site location on her omni-tool but it was getting harder to view as the storm pushed both ice and snow at her. "Dammit!" She cursed as she began to slide. She had looked at the map when the wind caught her off-guard and knocked her against a rock twice her size that was jutting out of the ground. As her footing began to slip on the ice she reached out to grab whatever she could to stop her from racing down the mountain side. "Okay, okay," she calmed herself as she came to a stop, hand clutching part of the rock.

Corporal Ludlaw, monitoring not only the signal but each soldier's vitals, came over her earpiece, "Are you okay Shepard? Your heart rate spiked."

"Shepard?" Michelle quickly followed in her ear piece.

"I'm fine," she answered trying to cover up her nerves, "I decided to try a fancy slide."

"No fancy pirouettes out here girlfriend," Michelle joked nervously.

"No?" Shepard answered; a little sorry that she told Michelle about her years of ballet training. "Well then, how about an entrechat-quatre?"

"A what?" Both Michelle and Luddy said in unison.

Shepard laughed as she carefully started moving forward, "Barbarians! That's what I am surrounded by … barbarians!"

"Why must you always treat me this way?" Michelle responded. "I thought after the baby you would be nicer to me."

Shepard smiled at her friend's comment and then went back to work, "Luddy, how far am I from the wreck?"

"You are about 4 clicks away." He answered. "Not too far really."

"Not too far if we were in a nice park on a sunny day," Michelle cracked back. "But one click on this fuckin' icy mountainside is too far."

"What was that mister wanna-be?" Luddy shot back. "I couldn't hear you over the tea kettle."

"Fu-"Michelle began to respond.

"Okay, you two!" Shepard cut in. "With this wind bullying the shit out of us, the mountain getting steeper … I need you to focus on what you are doing Michelle."

"Yes, ma'am" Shepard heard Michelle reply in a meek voice.

"As for you Luddy … focus on your blips and graphs while you drink your tea." Shepard laughed.

"Tea drinking pom can kiss my ass." Michelle muttered into her mic.

"After you suck my dick. " Luddy shot back in the Mako.

Shepard shook her head, "Chief Edgar and Corporal Ludlaw."

"Sorry Lieutenant." They both said in unison.

"Shit!" Shepard heard Private Seaborg groan. "Lieutenant, we are never gonna make it up there. The turians are probably dead anyway."

"Clamp it!" Michelle said still pissed at Luddy and now taking it out on Seaborg. "Shepard decides on what we do … she didn't ask for your fuckin' advice."

"Okay, okay," Shepard called over her mic. "I know this is challenging but if just one person survived that crash … we have to help them."

"Yes, ma'am." Seaborg responded almost in a whisper.

"Just stay close and watch your footing. The wind is picking up speed and with the ice it's getting to be a little-"

"Like a first date?" Michelle changed gears as she interrupted Shepard. "Speaking of which … how was your date with Dr. Suave? Did you entannie –quatro for him?"

"Entrechat-quatre," Shepard corrected as she carefully maneuvered around a rock. "Now who needs to clamp it?" Michelle's quick mood changes never ceased to amaze Shepard in all the years that they knew each other and another reason why sharing a place was never going to be an option.

After another twenty minutes of climbing the weather had really started biting at their heels, visibility diminished to just two feet and the minutes were running away fast. Shepard although worried about any survivors up the mountain did not lose sight of her own team, "Everyone doing okay?"

"Lovely," Michelle answered.

"Private?" Shepard called out.

"Hey semen, did you hear the Lieutenant? Wake up." Michelle growled as no response came from the private.

"Okay Chief … can you see Private Seaborg?"

"Barely," she heard Michelle respond. "Just like you. You are beginning to look like a shadow."

"Private, talk to me." Shepard said in a soft voice.

"Lieutenant!" the private sounded in a panic, "I can't see anymore."

"I know," Shepard said. "Use your omni-tool. You might have to bring it really close but remember that it will show you where both the Mako and the site are. Okay? Don't panic."

There was a pause between communication as the sound of the private starting to breath heavy sounded in Shepard's earpiece.

"I think I have a tear in my suit!" The private started to cry, "I'm getting cold! Dear God, I don't want to die!"

"Private Seaborg," Shepard said in a more stern voice, "everything is going to be fine. Chief Edgar?"

"Yes, lieutenant?" Michelle knew that when Shepard was using her big boss man voice, as she liked to call it, that it meant play time was over.

"Go back to the private and check his suit."

"Yes, ma'am."

As Shepard waited she looked out at the storm and couldn't help but think of the Crystalis Resort where she and Michelle had vacationed three years prior.

* * *

"Where did you go?" Shepard asked as she stepped into the Primrose Suite.

"Go?" Michelle asked as she looked up from the couch. "I never came to go. Someone left their damn omni-tool here in the room and the blue brigade bitch wouldn't go in and get you." Then Michelle mimicked the asari at the club, "I'm sorry, but we do not bother our guests once they are in The Minoque."

"What?" Shepard was confused. "Didn't you tell that crazy asari that we were lovers in the lounge?"

Michelle looked at her friend and laughed, "Us lovers? What the … no way! I am not into straight girls or girls like you who don't know they are into women. And what crazy asari?"

Shepard pulled out a tumbler from the wet bar and began pouring herself a whiskey. "Some asari looking at me like I was … I am not gay!"

"Are you kidding me?" Michelle laughed as she motioned for Shepard to pour her one. "One night with a woman and sister you will never look back."

This was a conversation that they had since boot camp. Michelle was always saying that Shepard had TOP written all over her. Shepard had countered that she wore dresses, make up and did not act or look like a man to be top of anything.

Michelle countered that tops came in all forms and "You sister are a top! Lipstick and all … which makes you a devious top. No one sees you coming. Some poor lesbian is going to see your curvy body, soft lips and long hair then bam! Tied up, legs apart and you driving into them."

Shepard rolled her eyes as Rose Stuart, their third musketeer in boot camp, asked, "What is a top?"

"I'm not into women!" Shepard said.

"What is a top?" Rose asked again.

"Now Rose here is a man's woman." Michelle said, ignoring Shepard's protests and Rose's question.

"Why thank you!" Rose had curtsied.

"Michelle, you need your head checked!" Shepard had laughed.

Michelle put her arm around Rose as she added, "Your boyfriend is your bitch and any man after him will always feel neutered … so, wake up and start reading Sappho."

"What's a TOP and who is Sappho?" Rose almost yelled which made Shepard and Michelle laugh.

Now here they were on vacation six years later and Michelle was still at it.

Shepard laughed as she handed Michelle a glass of whiskey and then sat down next to her. "If this is your way of trying to get me into bed … Stop!"

"Me with you?" Michelle motioned between them. "No way!"

Shepard pretended to be hurt, "You don't think I'm pretty?"

"Don't even," Michelle came back, "You know that you are attractive. I've seen you work a club. But I'd rather risk being with twenty straight girls then being with you."

Shepard took a drink as she kept looking at her friend. Michelle tried looking serious as Shepard raised a brow and smiled as she brought her tumbler down. "And here I thought that you were some smart, tough lesbian."

"Please!" Michelle shook her head. "You will need someone who is a lot smarter and tougher than me."

Shepard sat back after taking a large gulp of her drink, "Alright, Michelle … But I am not into women for the last time. And I'm not in the market even if I were … It's too soon."

Michelle turned to face Shepard and as she leaned against the back cushion asked, "Look, Manny has moved on and you cannot tell me that there is nothing about the female that attracts you."

Shepard thought about Manny being with someone else and as she took another drink grumbled, "Drink your drink."

"Sorry," Michelle pouted. "So maybe we should go hunt down that mystery woman that saved you? It was a woman, right? I mean it could have been a guy, I guess … a bland male white knight … eck! And god forbid!"

"No it had to be a woman," Shepard said as she stretched, "I told that asari that I was with you."

"Me?" Michelle smiled as she batted her eyes, "Really?"

"Well, not you but you."

"What? I'm confused now."

Shepard explained what had happened which made Michelle laugh harder than Shepard liked, "Okay, okay. I'm glad that you are enjoying my pain."

"Oh please," Michelle squeezed her arm. "I would have taken that asari up on her offer. Do you want to go find that mystery woman?"

Shepard shook her head, "No thanks … that big blue spider is out there somewhere. I think that I will go to bed."

"Speaking of blue," Michelle stopped her, "Did you see my blue future wife in there?"

"Who?"

"You never listen to me," Michelle sighed as Shepard stood up and walked to the window.

As Shepard stood looking out the window at the storm she couldn't help but think of who might have saved her. "Well, I don't know who pretended to be my girlfriend tonight but I would certainly buy her dinner … hell, anything for running medusa off! And why do they have to be so tall?"

"I like tall! Hey ... What if this mystery woman wanted more?" Michelle teased. "Wait ... you realize that she was probably an asari? Now isn't that priceless! Your white knight was a blue asari!"

Shepard turned to Michelle, rattled the ice in her tumbler and teased, "Probably your future blue wife."

"Oh, god," Michelle stopped. "I am really going to marry her now."

"Good night, you nut!" Shepard cracked as she headed for her bed.

* * *

"Lieutenant?" Michelle's voice brought her back to the present.

"Go ahead Chief," Shepard responded trying to see if she could make her two soldiers out in the storm.

"I can't find a tear but he's shaking pretty bad."

"Luddy, how are his stats?" Shepard asked.

"His heart rate is 145 BPM, Lieutenant. I'm guessing a panic attack."

Shepard turned towards the crash site and could feel her anger rising. _Dammit! I do not want to do this alone_. As she struggled internally she heard the private crying. _Stop complaining Shepard and just get moving_. "Michelle, take the private back to the Mako."

"What?" Michelle almost yelled. "I am not leaving you out here alone!"

"I hate to agree with strap-on but she is right," Luddy added.

"This isn't open for debate," Shepard said through her anger. "Chief Edgar, you are to escort Private Seaborg back to the Mako."

"Yes, sir!" Michelle snapped. "But once I get this crying douche delivered I'm coming to your side."

Shepard could feel the wind get just a little stronger and knew that she had to start climbing. "Chief, you will let me know once you are back at the Mako. Once there I will instruct your next move. Understand?" Shepard waited for a response and when it didn't come fast enough she growled, "I asked you a question, Chief Edgar."

"Yes, ma'am!"

Shepard understood that Michelle was concerned but she could not let emotions or friendship come before a mission. Not that she didn't want Michelle to follow her … doing this alone was not what she wanted. If she were being absolutely honest she was feeling fear and doubt start to creep into her mind and that would not do. _Okay Shepard. This isn't so bad. Just a little storm is all. You've been in worse places anyway so just breathe and put one foot forward_. _There could be turians in need up there. _She thought as she shifted the DX bag on her back. _You'll be there before you know it_.


	44. Artemis Tau Cluster Project

"You'll be there before you know it," Benezia said as her daughter pouted. "Trust me, Little Wing."

"But why can't I be grown up now?" Liara asked as she dangled her feet over the bench.

There was a warm breeze on the terrace of the reading room and Benezia couldn't help but smile as she looked down at her tiny ten-year-old, pouting. Her daughter was tiny for her age but not in spirit ... she was smart but also very impatient and headstrong. Since birth her daughter had pushed against the norm, questioned why at every stop and wanted to understand everything now as well as be her mother's protector.

"Patience, Liara." she instructed her daughter again for the hundredth time. "You must learn patience and self-control."

"But you could get hurt without me there!" Liara said as concern spread across her face, "Why can't you make me an adult so I can go with you?"

Benezia laughed as she bent down and picked up Liara ... "Because then I couldn't do this!" she teased as she started kissing all over the young asari's worried face.

This caused Liara to lose both her pout and worried look as she started to giggle. "Stop mommy!" Liara screamed playfully as she tried to wriggle free of Benezia's ticklish kisses.

"I'll stop only when you grow up." Benezia countered, kissing her even more.

"But mother, I am grown up." Liara was now standing full grown before her and Benezia was holding air. "Don't you remember?"

"Liara?" Benezia was trying to gain her senses when Saren appeared between them.

"Liara," He said in his soothing voice. "I have been looking forward to meeting you."

"And I you," Liara smiled at him innocently. "Mother says that I am to trust you and do whatever you ask."

"Your mother is very smart and knows what is best for you," Saren looked over at Benezia as he put his arm around Liara.

The sight of Liara being in Saren's clutches caused Benezia to cry out, "No Liara! He is not to be trusted!"

Saren looked over at Benezia, "Come Benezia, you know that this is for the best."

Liara began to pull away from Saren, "Mother? Isn't this what you wanted? Shouldn't I trust him?"

Saren began to pull Liara back to him with seductive words and the scenery changed around them as the ground to the right gave way … Benezia found all three now at the side of the cliff with no railing. As she looked down she heard Liara cry out as Saren continued to try and pull her back to him. Benezia looked up and in one sweeping motion pulled Saren away from her daughter and flung both him and her off the cliff.

As she fell she saw Liara on the cliff reaching out for her as she screamed, "Mother! Don't leave me!"

* * *

Liara's screams brought Benezia awake with a jolt. _Where am I?_ She thought in a panic. She felt the sweat running off her and for a few minutes she couldn't get control of her mind ... she thought that she heard voices and the walls had shifted.

Saren was asleep next to her and she carefully got out of the bed. _How did I get here … with him_? It was getting harder to keep her mind solid, feeling sometimes as if it was splintering and that black oily bugs were crawling all over her. She had been on Sovereign now for over a week and she could already feel her independence, her free will and her mind slipping away from her. Sometimes she was confused and the only thing that kept her sane was the thought of her daughter. _Liara, I will not fail you. I will not let anything harm you … not even me_.

Benezia could already see that she had failed her followers. They were different and with their change she realized, realized too late, that bringing them with her was a mistake. A tragic mistake. They were following Saren now, not her and there was nothing that she could do to save them. _At least not at this moment,_ she thought to herself. She was still hopeful that an event, that an opening would present itself and that she could stop the destruction that was coming. She could not give up hope if all was not to be lost. She prayed to the Goddess Athame to give her the strength of wisdom to prevail against both Saren and Sovereign. _How do I keep my senses?_ She had struggled with this for the past few days. _How do I not lose who I am? If I do not hang on … this creature will destroy all of us … family, friends, everyone. Liara. Oh, Goddess! I cannot lose myself completely. There is too much at stake_. _I must think of a way to keep a part of me alive … alive and ready to strike._ _I must find a way!_

* * *

Liara knew that if she was steady with her hand and patient enough that she would unearth it whole. _Careful,_ she once again silently cautioned herself as she brushed away the dirt … _You'll be there before you know it_. She had been hopeful at the start that the prothean bowl was undamaged and now with it almost free from the ground her hope and steady yet careful pace was almost rewarded with a bowl fully intact. Her breath had caught when she saw that it was decorated with art that mirrored the same vivid shades of red, orange and yellow as seen on the wall of Kyuos. "Beautiful," she said as she brushed away the dirt. She knew that no additional secrets would be revealed from its unearthing but she was excited just the same. Anytime that she came into contact with items that had not been touched since the protheans she felt a small rush.

"Dr. T'Soni?" Dr. Dacanay whispered, trying to not startle her. The Doctor specialized in paleontology and Liara found her inquisitive and sharp mind fascinating. Liara had arrived three weeks prior and while she enjoyed working with the doctor and her crew she did not feel the same about the weather on Therum. As she stepped off the shuttle she had sighed in response to the planet's extremely hot and humid environment. It was definitely not the type of weather she liked … especially when one's activity was digging, scaling walls and spending hours bent over artifacts still embedded in walls and the ground.

"Yes?" she whispered back as her brush pushed away the last of the dirt from the artifact.

"Wouldn't you like to stop and eat?" the doctor continued to whisper.

"I told Deek' Lo that I would skip lunch," Liara answered as she carefully rubbed her thumb against the lip of the bowl. Deek' Lo was a salarian responsible for the crews who set up the scaffolding, replaced burnt out lights, managed the mining blasts, carted away the dirt as well as the services dealing with the meals, clean bedding, toiletries. Only a salarian would have the energy, quickness of mind and stamina to manage all these activities on a daily basis.

"Uh, yes. Lunch." She hesitated as Liara began to take an even closer look at the artwork on the bowl.

"Isn't it amazing that no one has touched this since the protheans?" Liara said in a very hushed tone.

Dacanay nodded and then politely said, "Uh, doctor … its dinner time now."

"Dinnertime?" Liara looked up quizzically. She then looked at her time piece, shook her head and then rubbed her stomach. "Dinner, of course. Let me put my tools away and I'll be right there."

"Of course," the doctor smiled. "You were right … The bowl was intact."

Liara smiled up at the doctor as she began wiping the dirt off her brush. "I would love to keep this, but the Guildhall will want it."

"Maybe they will let you keep it." Dacanay said, which brought a smile to Liara's face. "You have a lovely smile, doctor." Dacanay said as she bent down to help Liara finish up her packing. "I am surprised that you do not have a mate."

"Mate?" Liara asked. "Doctor, I am only 105 years old."

"Of course," the doctor smiled back. "Too young … But you must have a lover or two?"

"Yes, I have someone that I occasionally see," Liara answered almost absent-mindedly as she finished putting away the tools and stood up. "… but nothing of consequence."

"I see," the doctor smiled. "Please forgive my frankness of speech … I have a human mate back on Illium and I'm afraid that her curious nature has rubbed off on me."

"Rubbed off?" Liara asked.

"Oh," Dacanay laughed, "I'm sorry. It's a human term for influence or taking on someone's characteristics."

"Rubbing off," Liara repeated. "Interesting."

The doctor said that she would keep a place open at the dining table for her and as she walked off Liara put back on her silver bracelet which was now shining under the floodlight. She turned the bracelet around until she was holding the tiny cross between her thumb and finger which made her smile. She still didn't fully understand what that symbol meant to some humans but to her it represented the one good interaction with a human.

* * *

Then her mind went back to Aikaterine and the night at the Minoque three years past. After Ismene Dantium had gone back to the human, Liara had hid until she saw Ismene leave. Once she knew that she could safely leave the human alone she asked the bartender if there was another way out and the bartender walked Liara to the employees' entrance.

"Not wanting to run back into Ms. Ismene Dantium?" The bartender had asked as she opened the door.

"No," Liara had answered, "I would prefer not to see her again this evening."

"I understand," the bartender smiled.

Just as Liara stepped out in the hallway and the bartender was about to shut the door she found herself asking, "What was the name of the human, by the way?"

"Human?" The bartender repeated. "Oh! Shepard … Lieutenant Elizabeth Shepard of the Alliance. But she goes by Shepard only ... She was the human who saved Elysium about six years ago."

"Elysium?" Liara had heard of the attack but had not really paid much attention to it at the time. She had been too busy on Kur'deshia at the time to be bothered with anything outside of her project.

"Yes, the Skyllian Blitz," the bartender added. "Is this just in case you run back into Ms. Dantium? I mean … since you are supposed to be with the human."

Liara gave a slight laugh, "Yes. I guess I should know the name of my lover."

"That might be wise," The bartender laughed as well. "And may I say that your lover is the most attractive human that I've ever seen?"

"Is she?" Liara asked, then straightened and said, "But of course she is … I would never date anything less."

_And how attractive is this human_? Liara couldn't help but wonder on her way back up to her suite. She tried to remember the Skyllian Blitz and all she really knew about that event was that one human had been instrumental in fighting off the batarians. Once she entered the Lavender Suite she poured herself a glass of Elasa and then sat down at the Extranet in the sitting room. _Okay… Alliance Lieutenant E. … uh, how does she spell her last name? She-p-ard_? She thought to herself as she looked at the blinking cursor.

"Liara?" she heard Eveline call out.

Liara took a sip of her drink and then softly moved to the master suite. Eveline was stretching as she sat on the edge of the bed, "I'm here, Evie. I was just looking up something."

"Oh?" Evie said as she got up and walked towards the washroom. "Prothean?"

Liara smiled, "Not this time … Human."

Eveline stopped with a confused look on her face, "What? Did you say human?"

Liara smiled at her as she put her lips against the rim of her glass. "Hm, huh."

"And why would you be looking up … human?" Eveline asked as she leaned against the washroom's door frame. "You don't like them … oh, are you looking at how to quickly kill them? Or has that strange female caught your attention and now you are thinking of being with one?"

Liara thought of the human next door and made a frown at her lover, "No!"

"You sure?" Eveline teased. "Why don't you go next door and invite her over? We could tease her mercilessly."

Liara shook her head, "Stop it!"

Eveline walked over to Liara and as she took the half empty glass of Elasa asked, "So tell me what you were really looking up and why."

Liara pulled Eveline to the bed and as they both sat down she explained what had happened in the lounge earlier while Eveline was asleep. "Wait, you left me in bed while you went for a drink?"

"And watched skyball," Liara laughed. "Now quiet while I finish …"

When Liara was done telling her about what had happened at the Minoque, Eveline shook her head, "I've always disliked the Dantiums. Especially the oldest … she was an absolute horrid bitch."

"You knew Krona Dantium?" Liara asked surprised, taking the glass of elasa from her and placing it on the nightstand.

"Unfortunately," Eveline sighed. "She was seeing a cousin of mine right before she ran off to Omega. She had always loved places that were seedy and Omega is one of the seediest … that and she had a thing for batarians. Omega has plenty of those as well. You know that their mother mated with one."

"I had heard that." Liara said as she stood up and walked over to the floor to ceiling window. The ice storm was raging outside and as she watched it she said, "But even a batarian is better than-"

"Don't!" Eveline said cutting her off as she quickly got up and went to her side and hugged her.

Liara gave her hand a slight squeeze as she continued looking out the window, "It's okay, Evie. Being a pureblood is who I am."

"I hate when you speak like that, "Eveline said as she kissed her cheek, "You are perfect."

Liara smiled and returned the kiss. "You have always been so kind."

"It is not kindness," Eveline answered, "It is the truth. Conventional wisdom might say that we asari should mate with other species … but if you are what we produce together. I say that we should go back to mating amongst our own."

Liara looked at her lover and gave her another kiss. "If you are trying to get me into bed … It's working."

"I thought that you wanted to see what all the fuss was about that human … or should I say your latest lover?"

Liara giggled as she pulled Eveline towards the bed, "I would rather pleasure you … a beautiful asari."

"As long as you don't do that … that turian thing on me again," Eveline laughed. "I need my legs by this afternoon … Unless you plan on carrying me to my shuttle."

"Turian flywheel position," Liara softly giggled. "I promise that you will have full access of your legs."

* * *

_I should send Evie a note tonight,_ Liara thought as she came back to the present. It would be years before Liara returned to either Illium or Thessia now that she was on the Artemis Tau Cluster Project but she had promised her Theia, Sibila and Eveline that she would write at least once every quarter. She had been happily surprised when the University of Serrice had funded this four year expedition on Therum and had offered her a position on the team. She had initially struggled with accepting only because she thought if her mother returned home she should be there ... but after talking with her Theia it was decided. Liara took a leave from the Thessia Guildhall, closed up her apartment and left word with her mother that she was on a project. She hoped that when she returned home that the Matriarch would be back.

Looking at the schedule she was also debating on leaving with the crew during the off-season when Therum was scheduled to become even more hot and humid ... but she was still undecided. If she kept finding the type of artifacts she might stay during the down time. There was no reason for her to leave without the Matriarch being home and Liara was enjoying the treasures that they were unearthing ... her latest find was beautiful and she had placed it in her room. She knew that it would eventually go to the Guildhall but for now ... it sat on her dresser.

As she walked toward the well-stocked cafeteria for dinner she played with her bracelet and thought of the Minoque again. _I wonder what she looked like, _Liara found herself curious again about that human. Throughout the years her mind would go to that time and she would almost search her on the extranet ... almost. She was almost afraid that looking up the human would be a disappointment. This Shepard would look like that Moon Unit Zappa ... _I must query her though sometime .._. _But not now … now I must eat_.

Now that her attention was not focused on the prothean artifact she realized just how hungry, tired and in need of a shower she really was. Her scientist uniform was sticking to her, sweat was running down her face and her stomach was not just growling, but roaring. _If only this place wasn't so hot!_


	45. A Turian Dance

_If only this place wasn't so cold! _Shepard thought as she continued moving up the mountain. Even with her suit on she could feel the bitter freezing wind trying to get in. She had been walking up to the crash site now for 30 minutes since ordering Chief Michelle Edgars to take Private Seaborg back down the hill. Based on her calculations, Michelle and Seaborg should be, if not already there, just a few steps from the Mako and that meant that Michelle would be calling her. As Shepard readjusted the DX emergency pack that she was carrying she made a decision that would not make her buddy too happy. No, Michelle would not be too happy when Shepard instructed her to stay there. _No, my friend … you are going to really hate me,_ Shepard thought as she stopped and leaned against a rock. _But hell, it's not like you're missing anyth-_, Shepard stopped mid-stream as she felt something move past her in a hurry and as she turned to see what had pushed passed, her feet were knocked out from under her. She slammed down onto the ground and as she looked up she could see a turian over her. _Shit! Now what?_ She thought as she remained on her knees acting wounded as she carefully pulled out her Bowie knife. In times of stress or of the utmost importance Shepard had always found her quoting scripture that her mother had taught her … today was no different. _Keep me as the apple of your eye; hide me in the shadow of your wings_, Shepard prayed as the turian moved in on her. He reached down and as he grabbed her by the throat she pushed the knife up and into his gut with all her strength. Had the turian not been wearing a helmet she would have seen the look of absolute shock, shock that a human could do this to him.

In one last attempt to overcome her, the turian squeezed even harder cutting deeper into her neck as she once again used all her strength and shoved the knife even farther into him. As the enemy dropped to the ground Shepard grabbed her throat. The turian had torn not only into her suit but also into her skin leaving Shepard exposed and bleeding. She could feel the burning wind snake into her suit and she felt tears of anger threatening to escape. _Don't you dare frickin' cry like some girl_, Shepard ordered herself. _You are an N7 soldier and a Lieutenant in the Alliance … now act like it!_

Once she had put herself back in line she started looking for identification on the dead turian and she found a type of steel wallet that had the turian's face, a fact she confirmed by removing his helmet to compare … unfortunately the writing was in turian so she needed to upload it. "Let's see who you are," Shepard said as she scanned the information into her omni-tool to translate. _Lers Wrylhilm, General_ popped back to Shepard. "General?" Shepard frowned, "What is a turian General doing out here?" Shepard wiped her blade clean as she focused on getting her bearings. She knew that now with a torn suit she needed to get out of the cold and she needed to do it quick. She had to limit her exposure or risk losing parts of herself to frostbite. She quickly moved on, trying to not panic when she almost jumped as Michelle came over her earpiece sounding panicked, "Shepard, are you there?" Shepard trying to calm herself before responding began to focus on her breathing as she moved forward. Michelle not getting a response quick enough repeated a little more loudly, "Please Shepard, please tell me that you are there!"

Shepard very quietly responded, "I'm here Michelle … what's wrong?"

"You need to get back here," Michelle answered. "We aren't alone."

"I know," Shepard was straining trying to see past the storm. "What's going on down there?"

"We are trying to stabilize Private Seaborg," Corporal Ludlaw said. "He was shot and wait ... How do you know?"

"I'm sorry, Shepard," Michelle said right on top of Luddy, "I missed the hole until we were back on the Mako. He was shot in the back … the kid is pretty tough. And here I kept calling him seme-"

"Shepard, you need to get back here," Luddy cut her off. "After we realized … well, that we weren't alone, I took a reading and there appears to be a small aircraft … probably a drop shuttle to the west of us."

Shepard knew that she couldn't be more than twenty paces from the crash and that even if she tried she wouldn't make it back to the Mako with the breach in her suit, "Luddy … protect the Mako and let me know if anything changes."

"What?" Shepard heard Michelle say in almost disbelief. "Shepard, these are not friendlies … they shot Seaborg and maybe at all of us. Hell, with that visibility up there I'm surprised they could see us."

Shepard started carefully moving forward when she saw flashes of light and a few more steps she could finally start to make out three figures in the mix of the lights. She was glad now for the rocky terrain and pulled herself around a large boulder as she kept it between her, the shadow figures and the craft. As she drew almost on them she could now see that there were three turians and one was using a type of torch to get the aircraft door open. "Luddy, I have a visual on three turians," Shepard said softly. "They are at the downed craft and they are definitely trying to get in."

"I guess it is safe to say that the craft did not fall apart on impact," Luddy said. "Can you see writing on the craft?"

Shepard squinted as she looked over the side but there was nothing, "Sorry … the sides are clean."

"Shepard," Luddy came over her earpiece as Michelle could be heard yelling at her to get away in the background, "There has to be more. There is no way-"

"I know Luddy," Shepard shifted on her left leg as she slowly brought her weapon up. "That's why I need you and Michelle to keep alert. Okay? Anyone come to your door other than two guys in suits on bikes …"

"I should have never told you that I was raised Mormon," Luddy stopped her.

"Sorry," Shepard laughed, "On a more serious note, why would a ship have no markings?"

"Pirate?" Luddy guessed.

Shepard thought of the dead General and shook her head, "No … This ship is not illegal. Or at least not in the traditional sense … But it is concealing its identity. Maybe it is carrying someone or something that does not want to be tracked?"

"Possible." Luddy's voice came back. "But whatever it is, be careful."

"That is the plan," Shepard said as she continued to monitor the activity, "Luddy, I'm about to get busy so I'm not going to be available to chat for a while. But you can clearly see my vitals so listen … if I flatline I need you to leave this place post haste … do you understand?"

"You are not allowed to flatline," Michelle answered from the background. "Do you hear me Lieutenant? No flat, straight or missing line … not today!"

"Yes sir!" Shepard teased her friend. While Shepard seemed light hearted in the banter it did not match what she was really feeling. She felt the freeze attaching itself to her as her body felt a type of tingling burn as every sense was on high alert. She had her weapon aimed in the direction of the shadow figures as she watched them working the soon to be open entrance. She didn't see a need to stop them from working on gaining her easy access or testing the waters. After all, Shepard realized that there could be a very unwelcoming group inside the downed craft. It took another ten minutes before the three had removed the door and once they had access and no resistance came from the shuttle Shepard took aim and before she pulled the trigger whispered, "When I called, you answered me; you made me bold and stouthearted."

The three shadow figures were quickly put down by the accuracy of Shepard's aim and before she headed to the opening she tried to see as far as possible in all directions. "Well, here goes nothing," she said to herself as she headed for the entry. As she made her way carefully into the ship she saw at least twenty dead turians scattered throughout the aircraft. "Luddy, how are you doing out there?" Shepard asked as she began to check bodies for any survivors as well as identification.

"We are okay down here," Luddy came back. "You?"

"A lot of dead turians here," Shepard said as she looked around the craft trying to see any type of logo or writing. "This shuttle is a clean slate. I can't find any markers or identifications anywhere." Shepard then saw a turian in a leather seat wearing a high end suit. He had been shot in the head and Shepard knew that he had been the mark. She looked through his clothes and found what she was looking for … a quick scan of the document and the words Villos Carthaana popped up.

Shepard then looked away from the target and while all the other turians were dressed in standard clothes only one was in full armor and helmet. She slowly moved forward and as she bent down next to the shooter he suddenly reached out to her before his hand dropped and he passed out.

"Shepard?" Luddy called out worried.

"I have a live one here," Shepard answered. "He … well, I think it's a he … He is fully armored and wearing a helmet. He has a deep wound, maybe gunshot … I'm not sure. Did you know that there blood is dark blue?"

"Really?" Luddy whistled. "So it must look like a bunch of smurfs threw up there?"

"Yeh, it's weird," She said almost absentmindedly as she continued to try and see what was wrong with the turian. "Keep an eye out in your area."

"Yes, Shepard." Luddy responded. "Please be careful up there."

As Shepard pulled the DX emergency pack off her back she began to attend to the turian's injuries. It was clear to Shepard that the craft went down as a result of a massacre inside and looking at this creature she quickly determined that he was the cause. _I'm not sure that healing you is wise_, Shepard thought to herself as she began wrapping the wound, _I may just regret this_. As if the turian read her mind he pulled out a HMWP Master Pistol and as he went to fire she used all her strength to push his arm away. Her quick response surprised the turian and as she tried to get to her knife he grabbed her thigh and tore into it, causing her to cry out in pain. As she fell forward but still on her knees he swung the weapon around again and as they struggled he shot her in the shoulder.

The blast knocked her across the room and into the wall leaving Shepard nauseas and blurry-eyed. The turian stood up and checked his wound. Shepard still on the ground watched as he moved about the room switching on orange boxes that she quickly determined were bombs. _Get up!_ She told herself, _you cannot die today! Not like this! Get up!_ Shepard refused to stay down as this creature continued to flip switches. She struggled to get back on her feet and her determination caught the attention of her enemy. He stopped what he was doing and watched her struggle to stand on her own. As Shepard finally made it up she went to pull up her rifle, wanting to scream as her left shoulder that was blown open rebelled ... the turian kicked her back down and at the same time went to pull her rifle away ... As he took a hold of it she swung her knife out and caught him by the arm slicing deep into him. The turian angrily brought his pistol over her and as she looked up at him, her face hidden under her helmet, he squeezed the trigger but instead of it ending Shepard's life they both heard just a click.

Shepard hearing the click thrust her knife into his leg, ripping her own shoulder more in the act, and as he came down on his knee she tried to crawl away. The turian caught her leg, pulled her back to him and as she fought he began to choke her. Shepard struggled as she felt herself getting lightheaded and then when she was almost passed out she felt a searing pain in her side. What Shepard did not know was that the turian had grabbed her knife as he strangled her and had pushed it into her. As she lay on the floor he slowly got up amazed at the human's determination.

As Shepard lay passed out and bleeding on the floor the turian checked his own injuries and then turned his omni-blade on, "Alastair, are you on-line?"

"Yes, yes." Came a quick response. "I am waiting just north-east of where you are. Was the mission a success?"

"Yes," the turian responded. "I will update the council once I am back onboard."

As the turian left the shuttle he saw the bodies of the three turians at the entrance which made his respect for the human go up, _she is skilled with a weapon_, he thought as he saw the bullet wounds to each turians head. _Clean and precise, impressive_. But he had a timetable to stick to so he continued on being careful not to walk into anyone else.

Shepard struggled to get up and in her first three tries she came crashing down again. _I can't die like this!_ she had angrily cried out. _Not like this!_ She felt her body hurting, her chest pounding, her shoulder throbbing ... _Get up Shepard! Don't you die today! Not today!_ She pushed herself up and she called out to Luddy ... to Michelle. There was no response and she knew that in the fight she had lost contact. _Move Shepard!_ she had told herself. She began stumbling for the door, stumbled over bodies ... stumbled out of the craft into the bitter cold. _Do not die! Not this way! Just keep moving!_

As he moved forward he thought of the human ... He admired her but he would have left the human there to die either by her wounds or the inevitable explosion when he came upon the body of General Lers Wrylhilm of the turian military. "General?" the turian looked at the bloody body and thought, "Who are you, human?"

The turian turned back to the shuttle, and as he got closer he saw her stumbling down the mountain ... he watched her as she fell to the ground and continued to crawl another few feet and then drop in the snow. He hurried over, checked her vitals and without hesitation threw her over his shoulder. He then carried her to the shuttle waiting for him and once onboard placed her on the ground. "Fix her," he said to the turian Alastair.

"Fix her?" Alastair looked confused. "Who is she?"

"A very determined human who shows promise," he answered.

Alastair opened her suit to see the extent of her injuries when he found her Alliance tags, "She is a Lieutenant E.W. Shepard." He said.

"Shepard?" The turian knew that name but why. "Ah, yes. Shepard … butcher of children her kind called her."

"Butcher of children?" Alastair questioned. "She butchered children?"

The turian ignored him as he bent over Shepard, removed her helmet and then held her tags, "You are a great example of military tactician and strategist during dark times … You will do what is needed to ensure success and with limited resources. This is an honor, human. "

"But Nihlus we aren't set to heal a human," Alastair said as he saw the SpecTRe Nihlus Kryik slowly inspected Shepard's injuries and damaged suit. "We would need to get her to that ship off-world and no one can know that you were here. No one must know that you or the council was tied to the elimination of the Admiral Carthaana. No one."

Nihlus looked at the face of the human and shook his head, "She does not know what she found. And even if she figures out who was on that ship … she never saw me. I will give this human a chance. Take us towards the Alliance vehicle."

* * *

As Shepard's body was left just fifty feet from the Mako with a rescue beacon set off next her … Nihlus looked out the window of his shuttle and watched as two Alliance personnel raced towards the unconscious female. "I could teach you so many things and the galaxy would be the better for it with you in our ranks."

"A human SpecTRe?" Alastair said as she maneuvered the craft away.

Nihlus ignored his companion as he continued to watch the human get picked up, "I give you my oath that if you survive, we will meet again Shepard and I will teach you to be stronger, quicker and a SpecTRe."

* * *

Author's Final Note:

Thank you to everyone who took time out of their lives and read this story. I am deeply grateful for all your comments, feedback and encouragement in the crafting of this story. Thank you all so much!

_PM Canales_

Chatsworth, California - Tuesday, December 13, 2011


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